what to do when your roommate doesn't realize you're home and thusly is having loud sex in the living room

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Baby take off your coat real slow
Take off your shoes
I'll take off your shoes girl
Take off your dress yes, yes, yes

You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on

Go over there turn on the lights, all the lights
Come over here, stand on that chair
Baby thats right
Raise your arms up in the air
And now shake em

You give me reason to live
You give me reason to live
You give me reason to live
You give me reason to live

Sweet darling
You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on baby
You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on

Suspicious minds are talking
There trying to tear us apart
They don't believe this love of mine
But they don't know what love is

They don't know what love is
They don't know what love is
They don't know what love is
I know what love is

You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on
You can leave your hat on

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Right? What gets anal out, again?

Just turn up the bass.

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Shenanaligans? (xpost)

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

inexcusable? I say trendsetting! heaven knows I'm leavin' my trucker hat on TONITE

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I kind of feel bad for him, too -- it's your roommate's fault, really. It's not like the guy knew it was your couch, but your roommate definitely did. And what's up with that, anyway? Wouldn't assfucking on the couch be incredibly difficult, just logistically speaking? I mean there's a whole floor there!

A friend of mine claims she knew someone in high school who had anal sex in a movie theater.

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Shenanaligans : anal sex performed by hooligans

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:41 (twenty-two years ago)

a little buggery, a little lysol, the day just perks up!

― Kingfish Balzac (Kingfish), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:41 (twenty-two years ago)

u + k: what did the trucker hat say?

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:41 (twenty-two years ago)

who had anal sex in a movie theater.

Was it during Lord of the Rings?

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I have to say, after coming back from (what i thought was) a good job interview, this thread is the whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles on top of my day. (puns intended)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

No, not only did he leave it on, he had to put it BACK on after he REMOVED his shirt! THINK about it...

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

KEEP ON TRUCKIN' ?

― dean! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

This would make for a brilliant and award-winning one-man play.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't think I've ever heard of lysol used for debuggery until this thread

― martin m. (mushrush), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Whoa. That's serious hipster fetishism.

― Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

please please let Trucker Hat Dude come across this thread someday (lame pun intended)

but Gear! now they know how annoyed their couch ass-love makes you you can bet that they'll try it again when you're not in.

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

wait, the timeline's all screwy here: did they spend forty minutes merely ATTEMPTING anal?!

― mark p (Mark P), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

debuggery!!

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Think Lysol could corner the anal hipster hygiene market by buying the right to this and using it as an ad campaign?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:44 (twenty-two years ago)

He could have been wearing a BUTTON up shirt

― Lil' Fancy Kpants (The K is Silent) (ex machina), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, that guys full name needs to be in this thread, definitely.

― dean! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:45 (twenty-two years ago)

either a) she was really into trucker hats, or b) he had something hideous on his scalp. OK, it was probably and most disappointingly c) the trucker hat dude thought it looked cool to have it on while doing it.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Lysol will become the Pabst Blue Ribbon of sex hygiene.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:45 (twenty-two years ago)

"lysol: it's not just for back-alley abortions anymore"

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:45 (twenty-two years ago)

inexcusable? I say trendsetting! heaven knows I'm leavin' my trucker hat on TONITE
-- J0hn Darn1elle (edito...), April 13th, 2004 4:40 PM. (later)

Trendsetting like two years ago! Even wearing a trucker hat now, let alone leaving it on during sex like it's a hot pair of boots or, you know, a tool belt or something, is just wrong.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Lysol should come up with a hipster version of the Puma ads.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not entirely sure he DIDN'T ALSO leave his socks on. I didn't chcek out his feet as I was mesmerized by the hat, which I think was an Urban Outfitters purchase.

I'm guessing she demanded the ass-fucking and then they did it, took a break, and were about to resume as I entered stage left

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

TOOL BELT SEX!?

― Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

hey, don't knock the tool belt

― mark p (Mark P), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

haha xpost

― mark p (Mark P), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

http://prodtn.cafepress.com/2/9859872_F_tn.jpg

I think you should buy this for truckerhat since he's probably not having a nice day now.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

I feel sorry for PBR. :(

And yes, tool belts are probably pretty hot.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Is it some kind of hypermasculine see how I will put up shelves after giving you a good rogering thing?

― Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:48 (twenty-two years ago)

So, where does this all stand now?

Is trucker guy making you an omelette now? Is she still cowering in her room?

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, toolbelts just make me think of Tim Allen going MORE POWER, which is not an image I wish to entertain mid fuck.

― Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:49 (twenty-two years ago)

"making you an omelette"

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:49 (twenty-two years ago)

ricardo: i dunno, i am talking shit. i wear mittens and listen to oval, what the fuck's a tool belt for?!

― mark p (Mark P), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I did feel a tiny bit bad for truckerhat, cause he obviously felt bad and probably didn't know it was your couch, but goddamn, a mufuckin' TRUCKER HAT?

Can I just say I am so, so thankful to you for being all brave and going out there and posting the results for all to see? Holy hell, my heart is doing backflips.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:49 (twenty-two years ago)

was this guy one of the Beachwood Sparks?

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Now I feel sorry for tool belts.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:50 (twenty-two years ago)

maybe this is her way of seducing you

― kephm, Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:50 (twenty-two years ago)

"See? Look what you made me do! Have anal sex with some lamo in a fucking TRUCKER HAT! GAAAWWD! You drive me CRAZY, can't you SEEEEEE?!!!"

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I think that anyone who thinks that leaving assspunk on your furniture is an aphrodesiac is a person to avoid sexually.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

also: domestically.

― mark p (Mark P), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm hot for you, so I had some other guy fuck me up the ass on your couch. DON'T YOU WANT ME NOW BABY? DON'T YOU?

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:52 (twenty-two years ago)

assspunk!

― martin m. (mushrush), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:52 (twenty-two years ago)

http://photos.friendster.com/photos/12/57/337521/3195888237370I.jpg

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:53 (twenty-two years ago)

If only Gear! had a digital camera.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

$5 to put some bagpipe music on in your living room.

― dean! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

"I love you so much, I'm going to have this trucker hat guy's retarded ass babies."

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

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