Why I hate the Daily Mail, as distilled into one edition

To be honest I'm laughing about it right now. My seven year old self found him very amusing.

the jumping started off when he was trying to avoid the elephant shit on Blue Peter

Do the Freddie!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGxDS10VAbg

His trademark was the jumping up and down, the Dreamers' trademark was their silly cock-a-leg dance. Top entertainment.

John Noakes: Get down, Freddie Garrity jumping up and down to avoid elephant shit on Blue Peter!

xps
Really kicks off at about 1:04

(xxxp) That's a different dance!

There was no end to their talents.

There was no beginning to them, either.

as jumping goes that was pretty good. Would take me a good half hour to get to that standard.

http://www.inrumor.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Cellist-Mike-Edwards-tragic-accident-1-570x311.jpg

Things are picking up for the rock star after his recent encounter with Liz Jones

Too soon :-)

(I lolled because I am a bad woman)

I was sad cos I thought it was that tit out of The Alarm.

That was Mike Peters. Mike Edwards is the guy from Jesus Jones.

haven't been following this liz jones business but i wish i had if this is anything to go by

Assuming what this wretched woman writes is true, nobody with an IQ higher than a peanut should feel sorry for her, let alone send her money. It is hard to imagine anyone who has created their own problems more than her.

Daily Mail discovers camwhores

In September 2009, her mailbox was hit by several air rifle pellets (not a shotgun blast as was first thought); it is not known by whom, or if it was intentional, although she claimed that it was because her remarks made the residents seem "cold, dirty, smelly and vicious".

DG, I think I touched on that upthread, how the article was published on the Sunday and on the Monday morning she allegedly had letters in from pensioners worried that she'd spent her £200k salary on holistic tooth whitener for her horses and cashmere throws to mollycoddle the bats in her belfry with and whathaveyou and didn't have enough money to keep her in organic eyebrow dye and quail's eggs.

Pointing out the inconsistencies from week to week is so easy (she's vegan, but she eats eggs and the schedule for her farm - currently up for sale - shows her loft insulated with sheep wool; she hasn't had a holiday for 20+ years but frequently talks about all the overseas trips she and Nirpal had - which she paid for, hence needing to defraud fictional pensioners)

journalists are depressing

except all those lovely journalists who post on ilx obviously

some good news at least
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1309135/Puppy-throwing-girl-Grandmother-saved-dogs-struggling-water.html

lol at the Mail - watch the horrific puppy hurling AGAIN! Now!

Take note Wayne, here's one footballer who's sticking by his WAG: Rio Ferdinand and wife relax on French holiday

By Mailonline Reporter
Last updated at 2:12 PM on 7th September 2010

* Comments (63)
* Add to My Stories

With Wayne Rooney, Ashley Cole and Peter Crouch all having faced allegations of cheating, it's refreshing to see a footballer who's sticking with his wife.

Rio Ferdinand and Rebecca Ellison looked calm and relaxed as they travelled through Nice Airport en route back to England.

........

Despite the fact Rio was himself alleged to have had a fling with a model while on his stag week earlier this year, Rebecca apparently decided to give their marriage another shot.

so it's not like they're trying to set up ferdinand for a fall, like

More like for a merking.

Take note Wayne, here's one footballer who's sticking by his WAG

Shouldn't it be Coleen sticking by Rooney and not the other way round? "Sticking with" doesn't make fidelity sound terribly appealing if they are really meaning he should be sticking with his wife and child, does it?

I also mentioned it on the Premier League thread, but this story equating being a hooker who sells her story to the paper to being murdered (illustrated by some lovely bikini snaps) is just awful.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1309847/Jennifer-Thompson-Amy-Leigh-Barnes-Two-victims-WAG-lifestyle.html

tbf i think a merking involves a flagrant deception of the merkee. i'm guessing rio ferdindand can fuck up his personal life all by himself, should he so desire.

Nah you need a cunt of a shitbag journalist to do the job proper like.

if yr being cynical, which of course would be wrong, you could link the rags' sudden interest in showing what a nice, sensible, white accountant wife rio ferdinand has to the superinjunctions currently obtained by several england players.

I was just thinking I hadn;t heard much about Rio's wife and she didn't seem like yer average WAG

Liz Jones sticks up for other inane babbling idiot while having a dig at people who aren't pig ugly and have the audacity to have children, etc non shocker

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1311217/LIZ-JONES-Kay-Burley-isnt-dim-She-just-doesnt-tanned-legs-doe-eyed-look.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1311228/Taxpayer-funds-council-adventures-Sindia-Lesbianandgayland.html

Just savour that url

She doesn’t fawn. She’s cantankerous, impatient and prickly. And men, even gay ones, hate that.

Liz Jones U R MAD.

x-post

I don't want to click on it and ruin it - I'll stick to some Narnia-esque imaginings.

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Sep/Week3/15734806.jpg

also why is the free cd inside kylie?

I thought daily mail readers hated animal rights activists, they going for a new demographic?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1313303/Britain-goes-halal---tells-public.html

They care about animal rights in the same way they care about gay rights - they're willing to hold their nose and fake some concern if it means attacking Islam. This story also includes their hypocrisy about free markets - which they're all for if it means screwing working people, but heaven forbid capitalist logic should dictate anything that affects their bizarre notions about 'anglo-saxon' civilisation.

Love how they tie it in with the Pope's visit.
tbh, I'm quite surprised by this, is halal chicken really cheap?
Honest question, because it isn't particularly cheap in halal butchers around our way. And have you ever tried getting a free-range halal turkey? More expensive than gold.

Obv the mail's concern for this is hypocritical, and this line: "The vast majority of people in this country would not want meat of this origin" from Tory MP Andrew Rosindell is cleary bullshit, has he never heard of kebab shops? But from an animal welfare perpective this is potentially a serious issue.

This makes about as much sense as going into a delicatessen in Golders Green and wondering why the meat is Kosher (both butchery methods are about avoiding blood in the meat and all the traditional prohibitions Muslims and Jews observe were responses to food poisoning risks in a certain climate). The only religious sect that objects to eating Halal meat on cruelty grounds *specifically* is Sikhism (but even so, most Sikhs I know will take a punt on the amazing Halal kebab place in Southall).

This makes about as much sense as going into a delicatessen in Golders Green and wondering why the meat is Kosher

not really, because you know what you're getting there. you wouldn't expect halal/kosher meat other than in places advertising as being halal/kosher.

it's probably true that the daily mail is being hypocritical, but it's a legitimate news story. it will be interesting to see if (say) the guardian follows it up. as one of those dreadful secularists i don't see why not.

No, really - because all the restaurants and takeaways using Halal generally advertise - if you can be bothered to look for the little sign, you'll find it, just as you would find 'Kosher for Passover' or pareve signs in a deli. The parallel that I was trying to draw is that nobody would have issues with being slipped a little something Kosher, unadvertised. I don't really have any problem with Halal or Kosher butchery that I don't also have with other forms of the mass abattoir, so to dress Halal practices up as *special* cruelty is a bit disingenuous.

i agree that the way 'we' treat chickens etc is already fucked up. but we shouldn't be going further in that direction!

We should at least baptise those chickens first.

No, really - because all the restaurants and takeaways using Halal generally advertise - if you can be bothered to look for the little sign, you'll find it

Apart from all the places interviewed by the Mail which say they don't, you mean?

tbh, I'm quite surprised by this, is halal chicken really cheap?
Honest question, because it isn't particularly cheap in halal butchers around our way.

It did say in the article that one of the sellers (Whitbread?) sourced most of its chicken from Turkey, presumably for economic reasons, so it just happens to be halal. Your local halal butchers possibly buys from UK producers, hence the difference in cost.

Yeah, I think that's probably right, obviously they're not buying tonnes of the stuff like Whitbread. And some even advertise free range/organic halal. I'm guessing that's not from Turkey. Just the thought of a truck load of cheap chicken, halal or not, makes me want to give up meat tbh.

I don't really have any problem with Halal or Kosher butchery that I don't also have with other forms of the mass abattoir, so to dress Halal practices up as *special* cruelty is a bit disingenuous.

The theory, i thought, was that the use of stunning prior to killing to prevent the animal suffering at point of death is specifically forbidden by halal. However further reading suggests this might be a misconception, and as long as the animal is still alive at the time of slaughter, i.e. the stun does not actually kill the animal, then it's ok. In which case this is just standard daily mail hysteria.