Things you were shockingly old when you learned

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(a julia child recipe steered me right)

nelson algreen (get bent), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 08:09 (seventeen years ago)

How to tie my shoes (velcro, you see..)

Sugar hiccup, Makes a pig soar and swoon (Pillbox), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 08:12 (seventeen years ago)

Didn't realise that Adam Ant was a pun, until a year or so ago.

^^^ this. Same with Sandy Shaw.

NotEnough, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:34 (seventeen years ago)

Fay Fife of the Rezillos.

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:35 (seventeen years ago)

(i.e. it's a pun on "I am from the town of Fife, my good fellow" in broad scots)

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:36 (seventeen years ago)

What's the Adam Ant pun? Adam Ant = adamant? If so... pretty lame pun.

Mordy, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:37 (seventeen years ago)

That's it.

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:43 (seventeen years ago)

xpost Tell that to Lai Mpun, the lead singer of Bangkok's Phleng Chat.

I CRIED (G00blar), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:45 (seventeen years ago)

I am 33 and didn't know any of these things. Wait - how the hell DOES a candle work?!

Savannah Smiles, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:53 (seventeen years ago)

Same with Sandy Shaw.
OK I was 32 when I found out this was a pun.

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:54 (seventeen years ago)

i don't know how to explain it but i used to think chickens had a really weird way of "mating", something to do with the rooster's legs. (!!?!?) :)

Ludo, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:55 (seventeen years ago)

I thought penguins were as tall as humans until that march of the penguins movie

I CRIED (G00blar), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 10:56 (seventeen years ago)

"that SHIFT + 6 = ^. I think I figured it out a month or so ago. I always wondered how people got that character."

^^^Dude, you beat me by a month. Thanks!

I once spent a half hour trying to eject a cd from a Mac before someone finally told me there's an eject button on the keyboard. I was going through all these crazy menus and preferences...

Nate Carson, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:10 (seventeen years ago)

I think I was like 16 or 17 when I learned that cows and bulls were the male and female versions of the same animal and not two distinct animals.

What sort of seemingly basic facts did it take you a surprisingly long time for you to learn?

― filthy dylan, Wednesday, November 12, 2008 5:30 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink


I did not know that oxen were cattle until about a week ago.

With a little bit of gold and a Peja (bernard snowy), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:23 (seventeen years ago)

I thought penguins were as tall as humans until that march of the penguins movie

loooool one of my friends thought this and it was since passed into running joke territory.

I think I've done that Mac eject button thing too :(

Pronounced lapels like 'labels' for years until corrected but happily don't dress well enough to use it often

The Slash My Father Wrote (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:34 (seventeen years ago)

My girlfriend was shocked to learn, at the age of 33, that a 'Flea Circus' is actually a rather charming mechanical toy, and is in no way operated by any parasitic insects.

Huey in Bristol (Huey in Melbourne), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:56 (seventeen years ago)

Ismael, at the age of 32, is shocked to learn the same thing. This thread is getting embarrassing

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:57 (seventeen years ago)

WAT! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flea_circus

Øystein, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 12:59 (seventeen years ago)

I thought penguins were as tall as humans until that march of the penguins movie

one of my friends thought this and it was since passed into running joke territory

no but seriously, what is this about?

negotiable, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:01 (seventeen years ago)

i mean i can see that there's rarely anything to size them against in the big white antarctic, but why would anyone then automatically think okay here's a bird i could play tag with

negotiable, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:03 (seventeen years ago)

u could still play tag w/it tho

SNAKES! (ice crӕm), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:04 (seventeen years ago)

But you could make the same assumption with ostriches in the big yellow desert (or wherever they live), and in that case you'd be right!

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:07 (seventeen years ago)

I'm still in touch with several grown adults who genuinely believe there's 'something' to supernatural claims about ouija boards, despite its fairly obvious origins in parlour games / illusions which utilised the (admittedly fucking spooky) ideomotor effect.

Huey in Bristol (Huey in Melbourne), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:08 (seventeen years ago)

aw no-one said 'where babies come from'

Cittaslow Mazza (blueski), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:14 (seventeen years ago)

I've had a lot of experiences in my adult life with mispronouncing words I understood as part of written text, but hadn't heard aurally in the context of conversation etc. For example, I was well into my twenties before I knew the word "vehement" wasn't pronounced veh-hee-ment. I wish others would politely correct you when you do that instead of letting you blindly sound like an idiot.

Sugar hiccup, Makes a pig soar and swoon (Pillbox), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:16 (seventeen years ago)

I'm a bit like that, but now I'm in the habit of saying works incorrectly, I can't get out of it. Canal is not pronounced can-el, but there's fuck all I can do about it now.

NotEnough, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:39 (seventeen years ago)

^ This happens to me all the time too - so much so that I actually now find it quite amusing when I realise, midway through a sentence, that a word I've never heard before is looming at the end. I suppose that people who talk a lot, rather than reading, must find the same with spelling. It only annoys me when some moron uses it as an opportunity to score cheap points (sadly fairly often)

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:40 (seventeen years ago)

I was going to start a thread like this, but it was going to be more about 'life lessons' that took you forever to learn, rather than trivia.

Anyway it's taken me this long to fully realize how unreliable first impressions can be when it comes to people.

invisible jet (wanko ergo sum), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:42 (seventeen years ago)

but why would anyone then automatically think okay here's a bird i could play tag with

haha

Ant Attack.. (Ste), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 13:57 (seventeen years ago)

TAL have an episode on this in the "best of" section on their wesite. people who thought unicorns were real, etc., lots of awkward silences at cocktail parties: good stuff.

rent, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:00 (seventeen years ago)

i like to tag birds. (runs)

Sugar hiccup, Makes a pig soar and swoon (Pillbox), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:01 (seventeen years ago)

There's a penguin here and he wants to say "you didn't touch me ner ner ner"

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:12 (seventeen years ago)

I thought penguins went "weh weh weh"

╓abies, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:14 (seventeen years ago)

I'm still in touch with several grown adults who genuinely believe there's 'something' to supernatural claims about ouija boards, despite its fairly obvious origins in parlour games / illusions which utilised the (admittedly fucking spooky) ideomotor effect.

― Huey in Bristol (Huey in Melbourne), Wednesday, November 12, 2008 7:08 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

you couldnt get me in the same room as a ouija board

a country packed with ponies (sunny successor), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:42 (seventeen years ago)

I was about 35 when I figured out Open Sesame = Open Says Me.

Rotgutt, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:44 (seventeen years ago)

i used to think HAZCHEM was a foreign word for danger like Achtung

Cittaslow Mazza (blueski), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 14:45 (seventeen years ago)

I just figured out, like 2 days ago, that the lyrics are "highway to the danger zone"

(until then, thought they were "I went to to the danger zone")

homosexual II, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:03 (seventeen years ago)

ooh i like that

Ant Attack.. (Ste), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:07 (seventeen years ago)

lol mandee those are even better

Uncle Shavedlongcock (max), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:22 (seventeen years ago)

Nothing, as I'm not shockingly old.

Eric H., Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:23 (seventeen years ago)

Misheard lyrics are always better. The singer of my old band had this (intentionally) corny line that went "sleep all day til the telephone ring / head to the bar and shake that thing", the latter half of which I always thought was "head to the barber and shave that thing".

monkey bonkers (╓abies), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:28 (seventeen years ago)

My friend always thought that Op Ivy song Take Warning went "skate boarding", which is way better.

monkey bonkers (╓abies), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:30 (seventeen years ago)

Same with Sandy Shaw.

Ok I sounded this out several times in several different ways and I still don't get how this is a pun. Help?

Kevin John Bozelka, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:40 (seventeen years ago)

I think that 'Shaw' is meant to sound like 'shore' - I don't hear it either

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:42 (seventeen years ago)

Sandy Shore.

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:42 (seventeen years ago)

Shaw is pronounced exactly the same as Shore, in England.

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:45 (seventeen years ago)

hows it pron in USA?

Mark G, Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:47 (seventeen years ago)

Well I guess it must be different, if people are having problems hearing it? Dunno.

I didn't even know it was her real name, tho.

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:48 (seventeen years ago)

wasn't, rather

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:48 (seventeen years ago)

I knew someone who, if my friend is to believed, is said to have uttered at age 18 "wait, you can't get pregnant if your clothes are on, right" while making out.

Their time's limited, hard rocks, too (mehlt), Wednesday, 12 November 2008 15:51 (seventeen years ago)

That is surprising. (Would've been 88 yesterday). And Martin Rev is almost 10 years younger, I never figured that.

Josefa, Thursday, 25 June 2026 02:27 (one week ago)

Ah shit I missed the Cabo Verde chat.

The creole is indeed closer to European Portuguese than Brazilian Portuguese, so "vurd" it is. Cabo Verde is reasonably close to the Azores, where I grew up, lots of migration. It also likes to see itself as a bridge between Europe and Africa, it even has some standing accords with the EU.

The impulse to swallow vowels at the end of the word is even stronger in S Miguel than in the rest of Portugal, so when I first started speaking it as a kid I would just sort of let words trail off into mumbling and silence, worked ok but I had to readjust once I got to the mainland.

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Thursday, 25 June 2026 07:50 (one week ago)

The Krishnas are a serious problem in Hawaii aiui? Oahu is a small island, and I heard from one woman that there's a sense that the cult preys on people there who are then separated from their families and local society. She said the mayor of Oahu had "kicked them out" but I don't see evidence of that now online from a quick search. See also the current breaking news w/r/t Tulsi Gabbard.

This unlocked a whole new subtext to one of my favourite video games, thanks for the info!

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Thursday, 25 June 2026 07:52 (one week ago)

European Portuguese (much like English) tends to replace unstressed word-final vowels with schwas, so yeah verde sounds like "verd". Interestingly, Brazilian Portuguese doesn't do this, there it sounds like "ver-jee". Don't know about the dialect spoken in Cabo Verde.

― fluffy tufts university (f. hazel), Tuesday, 23 June 2026 16:35 (two days ago) bookmarkflaglink

Ah thanks for finally explaining that because I've been so confused about the pronuncation. British people (including me) generally pronounce it "CAP-ay VERD-ay" but someone who seemed to know a lot about the Lusophone parts of the world pronounced it "Cap-uh Verj-uh" and that discombobulated me somewhat

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Thursday, 25 June 2026 07:56 (one week ago)

Have you not being watching the World Cup? Literally everyone in the British media pronounces it Cape VERD-ay.

stanes on the knees and blood on the jumber (Tom D.), Thursday, 25 June 2026 07:59 (one week ago)

Reminds me of my first trip to Lisbon. I tried to explain to the taxi driver I was staying at "ROO-ah da SANT-o EHS-TEH-VOW" (R. de Santo Estêvão), innocently thinking it must be pronounced roughly as it's spelled and with similar inflections to Spanish. He looked at me blankly until I showed him the address written-down - "Ah! Rua De Santo SHTEH-VOH". It was at that moment I realised European Portuguese isn't pronounced anything like it's spelled and spent the rest of the trip fascinated by how many letters disappear into the tongue

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Thursday, 25 June 2026 08:02 (one week ago)

xp no I don't watch the World Cup

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Thursday, 25 June 2026 08:02 (one week ago)

but you're right - I Think I've got so used to moving the pronunciation around in my head it's become "capay verday" but, yes "cayp verday" is more common

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Thursday, 25 June 2026 08:05 (one week ago)

It was at that moment I realised European Portuguese isn't pronounced anything like it's spelled and spent the rest of the trip fascinated by how many letters disappear into the tongue

Now imagine my surprise to learn the pronunciation of Leicester Square, Ladbrokes, Chiswick...

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Thursday, 25 June 2026 08:31 (one week ago)

This unlocked a whole new subtext to one of my favourite video games, thanks for the info!

Lol same

99 gram lychee (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 25 June 2026 09:21 (one week ago)

I have to admit that for a long time I pronounced Mojave as Moh-Jave. I would like to thank Our Lord Jesus Christ that I never visited the Mojave when I was younger. The people would probably have shot me in the head! And then I would have been dug up by a robot and nursed back to health by a friendly doctor. Then I would have been killed by flying tarantulas.

I was aware that there was a thing called "the Mow-Have-Ay" but I assumed it was something else. Now I just remember the line from Fallout: New Vegas. "Mojave, mo' problems". I once fed Victoria to the White Glove Society. Her story has an unhappy ending no matter which options you choose, so I felt that it was at least good that she got to wear a nice dress, if only briefly.

I am smart enough to know that Texas is pronounced "Teck-Sar-Say".

Ashley Pomeroy, Thursday, 25 June 2026 18:10 (one week ago)

wait how is Ladbrokes pronounced

mookieproof, Friday, 26 June 2026 02:19 (one week ago)

For the longest time I thought Yosemite rhymed with hose bite

Zelda Zonk, Friday, 26 June 2026 03:49 (one week ago)

xp "brooks" rather than "brokes"

Here is the mentioned donkey, (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 26 June 2026 06:36 (one week ago)

Which is very sad as its function is indeed to get lads broke.

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Friday, 26 June 2026 08:12 (one week ago)

see that's how they get ya

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Friday, 26 June 2026 08:15 (one week ago)

Arkansas was the one that got me for the longest time. Made sense in my head that you had Kansas and Arkansas, like the Arctic and the Antarctic.

rameau in the main room (dog latin), Friday, 26 June 2026 08:17 (one week ago)

I always want Vegemite to be pronounced va-JEM-i-tee based on the Yosemite model

xp Arkansas as in Arkansas River is pronounced two different ways, apparently depending on which US state it's running through

Josefa, Friday, 26 June 2026 12:50 (one week ago)

Ladbrokes is pronounced fuck off you pernicious leeches.

Ed, Friday, 26 June 2026 13:40 (one week ago)

the Azores, where I grew up

What was that like? I find it difficult to imagine, so different from my experience.

Nasty, Brutish & Short, Friday, 26 June 2026 23:02 (one week ago)

How is that pronounced

just what is it that you think the "ilxor algorithm" directs? (Hunt3r), Saturday, 27 June 2026 01:56 (six days ago)

Mow-Have-Ay

mojave is pronounced more like mohawk-y

shaking babies (map), Saturday, 27 June 2026 02:15 (six days ago)

AYyyyy…ZOR ayys. like fonzie?

just what is it that you think the "ilxor algorithm" directs? (Hunt3r), Saturday, 27 June 2026 02:47 (six days ago)

I don't wanna take a stab at it because as a non native English speaker I fear my attempts would perhaps confuse things further, but this video has it correct:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=142zclENL0M

Of course in Portuguese they're the Açores. A very large percentage of Portuguese immigration to the US and Canada is Azorean, since we're halfway across the Atlantic anyway (mainlanders tended to move to France and Switzerland instead).

Fun fact, the islands are named after a bird that doesn't actually exist there, some sailor just got the species wrong.

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Saturday, 27 June 2026 08:02 (six days ago)

AY zors seems about right and matches my usa usage. wow that place seems amazing

just what is it that you think the "ilxor algorithm" directs? (Hunt3r), Saturday, 27 June 2026 08:24 (six days ago)

What was that like? I find it difficult to imagine, so different from my experience.

My parents moved from Hamburg, Germany when I was four years old, mainly because my dad was despondent at Germany's turn from his student radical days into the yuppiedom of the 80's - so like the boomer bands he loved, he decided to get it together in the country and become a farmer. We were in S Miguel, which is the largest and most developed of the islands, BUT within that context we were in one of the smallest villages, and on a street that mostly had Summer houses for tourists. So I'd say it was a very isolated childhood, I did have friends but the cultural gap was immense, video games and TMNT pretty much all we could agree on, I wasn't really an outdoors kid. So getting the internet in my early teens really saved my life, made closer friends than I ever did in school.

It's a place of immense natural beauty and I had the ocean 10min away on foot, so it did give me a love of the sea and swimming; the port where I would swim at that time still had amazing ecodoversity, I'd see starfish and octopi and little crabs, that's all ruined now. Also fond memories of a hot spring waterfall (they charge for it now) and the mountains. I'm still not an outdoors person but yeah definitely thankful that I grew up surrounded by such beauty, I used to stay awake all night online talking to people in Australia and then check out the most amazing sunrise from my balcony.

Socially people are very closed off and stick to their own, my parents made a lot more friends who were immigrants as well (Cabo Verde, Angola, Brazil). Everyone was very catholic in theory tho obviously if anyone wanted to do something that the church didn't approve of they'd do it anyway (this taught me a lot about how religion works).

It's a totally different world now tho, there's a hipster record shop and a hipster music festival (Tremor), people are openly gay without getting beat up on the regular. Recently we've been overrun by American digital nomads of the woo woo variety, my mum likes it because now she gets to do yoga but on the other hand I have to debunk the chemtrails bullshit and other conspiracy theories that these ppl love to get into, despite being hypervocal about "fleeing Trump".

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Saturday, 27 June 2026 08:38 (six days ago)

xp "brooks" rather than "brokes"

ty

i grew up in a north american town called cheswick, and, whatever, carry on

mookieproof, Sunday, 28 June 2026 03:33 (five days ago)

Euro Portuguese is to Brazilian Portuguese what Danish is to Swedish, maybe. Just kind of ... swallowed

Cattedrale metropolitana di Santa Maria de Episcopio, Sunday, 28 June 2026 03:56 (five days ago)

lol Daniel I have a hipster-type friend who just bought a house in the Azores. I think right now he's splitting his time between there and D.C., where his wife works. But they're planning to move there full-time at some point. If you hear of a guy offering banjo lessons, that's him. I don't think he's into chemtrails tho.

paper plans (tipsy mothra), Sunday, 28 June 2026 04:06 (five days ago)

Haha, banjo players def welcome! Do you know which island he's on?

a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Sunday, 28 June 2026 07:53 (five days ago)

i was completely unaware of the Mel Brooks/David Lynch/Elephant Man connection until reading all of the tributes to Mel's 100 years on earth yesterday.

My homies buttthole surfers' record sounds like a f (Western® with Bacon Flavor), Monday, 29 June 2026 13:57 (four days ago)

this one is embarrassing but i didn’t get the pun in “Honk if You’re Horny” bumper stickers until last week, when i saw one that read “Chonk if You’re Chorny” and put two and two together

out of the cradle endlessly party rocking (the table is the table), Tuesday, 30 June 2026 10:24 (three days ago)

I didn’t realize it was a pun either! So that’s why I’ve never gotten laid by honking.

Illegal Algae (Boring, Maryland), Tuesday, 30 June 2026 12:11 (three days ago)

No honky, no bonky

Scott Baiowulf (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 30 June 2026 12:13 (three days ago)

That Walt Disney is not, nor was he ever, cryonically frozen; he was cremated. This is an urban legend.

Cattedrale metropolitana di Santa Maria de Episcopio, Wednesday, 1 July 2026 00:58 (two days ago)

Suspended animation

Halfway there but for you, Wednesday, 1 July 2026 02:32 (two days ago)

Never knew Billy Preston was gay until today. I heard "Will It Go Round in Circles" on the radio--never a favourite; it's okay--and the line "I've got a story, ain't got no moral/Let the bad guy win every once in a while" jumped out at me. I wondered where the song stood chronologically in relation to Nixon and Watergate--checked his Wikipedia page (the album came out in October '72; maybe with re-election imminent, that line captured that feeling), found out the other.

clemenza, Thursday, 2 July 2026 18:20 (yesterday)


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