Conservapedia - An encyclopedia you can trust

This is either the funniest parody site ever or, er, I can't even imagine the alternative.

It's not a parody site, but there are likely Colbertist operatives within.

I wonder how they square Obama's adherence to the tenets of Islam and Sharia law with the several instances of him drinking alcohol.

He arrogantly thinks he's above sharia law.

Look, if conservative Christians can believe in stoning homosexuals yet wear garments of mixed wool and cotton fibers, then clearly Muslims can also pick and choose what rules they follow, right?

The thing about these people(rightwing auhoritarian follower-types) is something like what Chris Hedges has talked about in his book _American Fascists_ and what we've discussed previously; ultimately, most of them are victims. Reality and modernity have resulted in them being either left out or left behind. The various ways they were able to handle(or ignore, if need be) daily life have changed or been destroyed in the last half-century. Either they weren't able to cope, or the families & communities they were born into weren't, and so they fall into or choose this unreality. Fred Clark has talked about this for years in detailing American Evangelical Culture and his weekly hilarious eviseceration of the first _Left Behind_ book.

And so we're left with folks who are pretty undeveloped, have never allowed themselves(or been allowed) times of self-reflection, or emotional maturity. And so you get this bullshit infantile, incoherent, and at times superbly comic example of cognitive dissonance in real-time.

But yeah, a lot of them are still fuckheads, and as John Dean and Dr Bob Altermeyer wrote, part of the fraction of America(sorta like your Bee Enn Pee-types, perhaps?) who would happily march us into a brutal, violent theocracy, if not full-on fascism, and think us all better for it.

They are completely shameless...

Obama recently referred to his "Muslim faith."[30]

The reference number leads to a note which leads to a youtube clip clearly showing the opposite.

Does anyone read this crap apart from us though?

oh plenty do, but mainly for the lolz, i'd suspect

That's kind of what I meant. I don't see anyone actually referencing this stuff.

Critical Thinking in Math

* Is this ever going to happen? It's now been over a year since it was scheduled to start . . . -CSGuy 19:15, 13 October 2008 (EDT)

I've found greater interest in American History right now, so it's taken first priority. It's unfortunate that some who have math skills seem resistant to looking at math critically.--Aschlafly 22:17, 13 October 2008 (EDT)

Watch out, the people with math skills are part of the liberal plot too!

I can't stop reading it!

Reasonable Explanations for Atheism

There are a number of reasonable explanations for atheism:

* Moral depravity:

It's not a parody site, but there are likely Colbertist operatives within.

― ᑥ ᑥ ᑥ (libcrypt), Saturday, November 8, 2008 5:33 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I'm pretty sure at least 25% of these are "Cobertist" operatives

coLbertist

still my all-time favorite conservapedia passage:

According to the origins theory model used by young earth creation scientists, modern kangaroos are the descendants of the two founding members of the modern kangaroo baramin that were taken aboard Noah's Ark prior to the Great Flood. It has not yet been determined by baraminologists whether kangaroos form a holobaramin with the wallaby, tree-kangaroo, wallaroo, pademelon and quokka, or if all these species are in fact apobaraminic or polybaraminic.

After the Flood, these kangaroos bred from the Ark passengers migrated to Australia. There is debate whether this migration happened over land[6] with lower sea levels during the post-flood ice age, or before the supercontinent of Pangea broke apart[7] The idea that God simply generated kangaroos into existence there is considered by most creation researchers to be contra-Biblical.

Other views on kangaroo origins include the belief of some Australian Aborigines that kangaroos were sung into existence by their ancestors during the "Dreamtime" [8] and the evolutionary view that kangaroos and the other marsupials evolved from a common marsupial ancestor which lived hundreds of millions of years ago.[9]

Man, these retards are retarded.

http://www.conservapedia.com/Starlight_problem

Corky Romano

Do we really want to promote movies that will never be classics? And about this kind of subject matter?--TerryHTalk 09:57, 16 April 2007 (EDT)

* Deleted --Ed Poor 15:31, 10 May 2007 (EDT)

Category: Articles for deletion -> Cheesy potatoes

Keep

Cheesy potatoes can taste pretty darn good, and it would serve the average Conservapedian to have access to a recipe that is sure to provide a low-cost, high-taste alternative to Easy Mac. --Huey gunna getcha 16:01, 26 March 2007 (EDT)

Neutral

* I'm neutral on this. I don't think we really need an article on cheesy potatoes, and if we do have an article I think it should be useful to the reader and give the full ingredients list and cooking directions, without holding back any secrets. Dpbsmith 15:08, 10 March 2007 (EST)

P. S. I see no reason at all why this couldn't go on User:TimothyR, TimothyR's own user page, so I'm going to take the liberty of copying it there now in case the article gets deleted before he has a chance to copy it. Dpbsmith 11:28, 11 March 2007 (EDT)

Are we too high-brow to include entries on one of the most delicious of summer side-dishes? A good batch of cheesy potatoes can make an ordinary steak seem gourmet. Deleting this entry would abuse the principles of an encyclopedia: Is something relevant only if it has some sort of large societal impact? The encyclopedia's comprehensiveness is it's main strength: Eliminate cheesy potatoes and you can never be a true reference. Mittromney 16:18, 26 March 2007 (EDT)

I suspect you of being tongue-in-cheek, but if this is your opinion shouldn't it go in the "keep" section? Dpbsmith 14:29, 28 March 2007 (EDT)

Delete

* I believe it should be deleted - and not only because I hate cheese potatoes. If we want to make this a professional site we're going to need professional articles and posts and avoid cheesy posts like this. Cheesy potatoes really doesn't fit the bill....Tash 17:08, 10 March 2007 (EST)

* I believe this should be deleted as it really isn't encyclopedic. I suggest deleting this article and making one on potatoes in general. Sulgran 20:53, 10 March 2007 (EST)

* This is silly. MountainDew 00:45, 11 March 2007 (EST)

* Delete Geo. 00:48, 11 March 2007 (EST)

* Would rather suit a cook book than an encyclopedic entry.

haha, lookee what i found:

Political and Social Themes

Several stories in the series have been subtly or overtly political in their themes. For instance, The Green Death (1973) emphasized the dangers of pollution and big business; while the following year's Invasion of the Dinosaurs featured a contrasting menace -- pro-environment extremists. Other stories have taken their themes from current news stories of the time, such as the United Kingdom's entry into the Common Market. Many of these pro-liberal stories came during the period where the show was produced by Barry Letts, whose heavily liberal and environmentalist views shaped a lot of stories in the early 1970s. Apart from this period, the original series generally did not have a particularly heavily political leaning (perhaps reflecting the less liberal culture in the BBC in those times), and in fact The Sun Makers (1977) was a pro-Conservative story that told of the dangers of heavy taxes and overly complex governments.

In a recent episode, the Daleks - Doctor Who's most dangerous enemy, a race of creatures who are physically shriveled and weak but contained within an armored tank-like body - take over Manhattan. They ruthlessly exploit workers engaged in construction and repair on the Empire State Building. This was reported in the British newspaper The Independent as a metaphor for the rampant abuse of capitalism. Conservative writers in The Guardian have used this as supposed evidence of the BBC pumping out "relentless socialist propaganda", although others argue that this assumes an inherently Marxist perspective. The lead writer of Dr. Who, Russell T Davies is known for aggressively promoting the gay agenda in his prior show Queer as Folk and continuing to promote it in Doctor Who (despite the fact that the show is supposed to be geared towards a young audience), with many openly gay or bisexual characters, including the lead of the spin-off Torchwood, Captain Jack Harkness. Davies' attitude has been contrasted with that of John Nathan-Turner, the final producer of the original series who, while being publicly known as a homosexual, never allowed this to overtly influence the stories written while he produced the show.

again, Poe's Law at work:

Dalek
A Dalek is a member of race of cyborgs which hail from the planet Skaro. They are featured in the internationally-popular BBC TV show Doctor Who. Externally they are pepperpot-shaped metallic machines, with a single eye-stalk, a gun, and a utility arm, but internally they are controlled by an amorphous Kaled mutant. The Dalek race is fiercely resistant to malign outside influence, and the purity of their race is of the utmost concern to them. The liberal BBC paint these characteristics in a most negative manner since the Daleks are essentially a conservative race. Indeed when Terry Nation first came up with the concept he modelled them after a right of centre political entity. In the new series of Doctor Who the Daleks are shown to be religious, instructing the Doctor and his companions not to blaspheme. However, they seem to follow some sort of heathen emperor worship cult rather than a genuine religion.
Categories: Fictional characters | Science fiction

"some sort of heathen emperor worship cult"

The liberal BBC paint these characteristics in a most negative manner since the Daleks are essentially a conservative race. Indeed when Terry Nation first came up with the concept he modelled them after a right of centre political entity.

that's the thing; there's too much statistical noise, if you will, to tell if this is real or not. I mean, ferchrissakes, you have Nyder wearing Iron Crosses and a black uniform. 'Right of centre'?!

http://www.kaldorcity.com/graphics/screengrabs/genesis1.jpg

A tangential and probably not at all original thought (I've never studied any of this but I'm assuming I'm saying something really obvious to many) but it's interesting how conservatives construct their conservatism along continuous, unchanging lines, when the beliefs themselves, whatever they may be, and wherever or whenever they occur, are no more than recent inventions. At the dawn of the industrial revolution, conservatism implied a kind of environmentalism insofar as the new machinery, the growth of the city, and the arrival of mass production, was often seen as a threat to the land itself, or at least to traditional agricultural life. Somehow, recently, all that has flipped: now conservatism is allied to, rather than opposed to, the mass mobilisation of workers and technology. That's probably what conservatism is at heart, of course, ie, the maintenance of a myth that what is happening now is what has always happened.

* Descriptions of dragons are widespread and match descriptions of dinosaurs, suggesting that dragons were real creatures and were actually dinosaurs.

* Descriptions of dragons are widespread and match descriptions of dinosaurs, suggesting that dragons were real creatures and were actually dinosaurs.

* Descriptions of dragons are widespread and match descriptions of dinosaurs, suggesting that dragons were real creatures and were actually dinosaurs.

The page on F.D.Roosevelt is some str8 up nasty weasely shit.

That's probably what conservatism is at heart, of course, ie, the maintenance of a myth that what is happening now is what has always happened.

thx for this

Apart from this period, the original series generally did not have a particularly heavily political leaning (perhaps reflecting the less liberal culture in the BBC in those times)

Damn those conservative titties and Benny Hill gags.

Ha yeah I thought I was being really obvious, allow me my baby steps.

http://www.conservapedia.com/IQ

http://www.fixmbr.de/wp-content/uploads/us_election_iq.jpg

A sympathy vote is a vote given in an election to a candidate because of that candidate's apparent disabilities. It is believed[Citation Needed] that up to 3% of the votes given to Barack Obama during the 2008 presidential election was sympathy votes, enough to have determined the outcome in favour of Sen. Obama.

somebody please please put that election iq jpg on teh IQ page

don't think you can link to external images.

also it's a hoax ;_;
http://www.snopes.com/politics/ballot/stateiq.asp

Their obsession with homosexuality is most comical. http://www.conservapedia.com/Homosexuality weighs in at an impressive 23,000 words, almost exactly double the wikipedia entry. And many of the sections link off to longer separate pages - just in the health bracket alone you can find pages on
* Homosexuality and AIDS
* Homosexuality and MRSA
* Homosexuality and Syphilis
* Homosexuality and Gonorrhea
* Homosexuality and Lymphogranuloma Venereum
* Homosexuality and Parasites
* Homosexuality and Proctitus
* Homosexuality and Hepatitis
* Homosexuality and Shigellosis
* Homosexuality and Anal Cancer
* Homosexuality and Illegal Drug Use
* Homosexuality and Mental Health
* Gay Bowel Syndrome
* Homosexual bathhouses and disease
* Homosexual circuit parties and disease
* Lesbianism and Obesity

still my all-time favorite conservapedia passage:

According to the origins theory model used by young earth creation scientists, modern kangaroos are the descendants of the two founding members of the modern kangaroo baramin that were taken aboard Noah's Ark prior to the Great Flood. It has not yet been determined by baraminologists whether kangaroos form a holobaramin with the wallaby, tree-kangaroo, wallaroo, pademelon and quokka, or if all these species are in fact apobaraminic or polybaraminic.

After the Flood, these kangaroos bred from the Ark passengers migrated to Australia. There is debate whether this migration happened over land[6] with lower sea levels during the post-flood ice age, or before the supercontinent of Pangea broke apart[7] The idea that God simply generated kangaroos into existence there is considered by most creation researchers to be contra-Biblical.

Other views on kangaroo origins include the belief of some Australian Aborigines that kangaroos were sung into existence by their ancestors during the "Dreamtime" [8] and the evolutionary view that kangaroos and the other marsupials evolved from a common marsupial ancestor which lived hundreds of millions of years ago.[9]

― With a little bit of gold and a Peja (bernard snowy), Saturday, 8 November 2008 22:32 (2 days ago) Bookmark

More like lolobaramin amirite?

also it's a hoax ;_;
http://www.snopes.com/politics/ballot/stateiq.asp

Why I'll be... Apologies, I had no idea. :-(

* Lesbianism and Obesity

^^lol

Obsessed? I don't know, they don't have a portal yet.

http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Sexual_intercourse&diff=prev&oldid=277307

indeed

or, indeed!

Category:Human Sexuality
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Conservative Party MP and Shadow Minister Damian Green embarrassed Britain's Socialist government by revealing its lies and blunders over immigration policy once too often - so they had him arrested and held incommunicado for nine hours. So much for the respect of liberals and leftists for freedom and democracy. Americans can look forward to this kind of thing as the Obama caliphate takes hold. [1]

hahahahaha obama caliphate

Yeahm Damian Green who, like all British conservatives (at least pretends to) believe in 'socialized medicine'.

Bob Seger (b. 1945) is a popular American rock musician. One of his biggest hits is the song "Night Moves." This article is a stub. You can help Conservapedia by expanding it.

Britain's Socialist government

Americans can look forward to this kind of thing as the Obama caliphate takes hold. [1]

i love that this is footnoted.

changing by the hour!

http://www.conservapedia.com/Damian_Green

Damian Green is a British politician and Conservative Party member of the House of Commons. He is the party's spokesman on immigration policy, and has repeatedly embarrassed the ruling socialist Labour Party, pointing out many incidences of incompetence and bungling, and exposing lies told by Home Office ministers responsible for immigration policy. In November 2008 he was arrested by a large squad of anti-terrorist police and held incommunicado for nine hours, while his home and office were searched. The case has raised grave disquiet about the misuse of police powers by the socialists in power in order to stifle dissent.[1]
HELP US IN THE UK - WE ARE IN SERIOUS POLITICAL TROUBLE. DAMIAN GREEN WAS ARRESTED BY OUR OUT-OF-CONTROL RULING LABOUR PARTY. PLEASE RAISE AWARENESS IN AMERICA - OUR ALLIES FOR SO LONG:
Incredibly, in the last five or ten years, we have seen - or rather not seen - an enormous change in the democratic freedoms afforded to British citizens. To name but a handful; we are being forced to adopt unwanted and malignant identity cards (despite owning passports already), we can be placed under 42 day arrest for mere suspicions, our government cannot keep a track nor hold of our personal data and we have been pushed into two controversial wars apparently under our ruling party's need to be associated with right-wing America.
Now we are being asked to accept that a political opposition leader can be arrested apparently at the behest of the ruling party, without a statement any more substantial than a cursory "i didn't know" from our illustrious, scheming and power-crazy prime minister. Does this scenario remind you of anything? Let's consult that good old standby, namely Recent History. Namely Zimbabwe. China. Russia. Iraq. Syria. Rwanda. DR Congo....need I go on?
We are on a precipice - and the chasm beneath us is as dark as it can possibly get. Our nation - for so long a shining paradigm of democracy and fairness that the world could aspire to - is hanging by a thread. And the worst of it? That our government can create this police state to either rapturous applause whipped up by the right-wing idiots of the tabloid press, or the sheer political apathy that has infected most of our population and which has allowed this vile Labour government to spread uncontrolled, far beyond the realms of the free 'Western' world. We must regain control of our nation as a people, before the dark dreams of our 'leaders' stop us from doing so altogether.

The Trustworthy Encyclopedia

Random serendipitous searching comes up with fun:

http://www.conservapedia.com/Violent_video_games

Violent video games
Violent video games are video games that teach and encourage the players -- typically children -- to engage in horrific virtual violence. Teenagers playing these games are desensitized to violent and criminal acts[1][2]. In a particular study specifically children who were diagnosed with neurotic behavior and predisposition to aggression reacted to violent stimuli brought by video games, though not all of them showed aggressive behavior as a consequence[3].
Examples of violent video games include:
Grand Theft Auto (series) -- The series, which now spans ten games, is considered a "sandbox" game where a player can roam around a virtual city at will. The player is able to obtain many different types of weapons, murder anyone they encounter including other criminals and prostitutes, innocent bystanders, and even police officers. One of the games also included a modification that allowed a player to engage in graphic sexual acts in the game however this was not made for the public and was found long after the original release.
Doom and Quake are first person shooter games wherein a player roams around various levels killing various demonic creatures. The games have been described as murder simulators and were blamed as inspiration for the Columbine Massacre as well as other school shootings.
Postal 2: Apocalypse Weekend (M-rated) -- The ads for this first-person shooter boast that new weapons will enable you "to hack your enemies to meaty bits!" It involves a game character who commits violent acts against unarmed civilians. Other features in the Postal series include: urinating on people to make them vomit in disgust, using cats as shotgun silencers, and playing fetch with dogs using human heads.
The Punisher (M-rated) -- Game player is able to jam knives into victims' sternums and pull up to increase the damage, cut off heads, ram a character's open mouth onto a curb, run a character over with a forklift, rip a character's arms off with an industrial hook, and set a character on fire in an electric chair.
Resident Evil (series) (M-rated) -- Includes chainsaw decapitations and impalements, and zombies and other monsters ripping off other characters' throats and biting off their heads. A promotional chainsaw shaped controller was released with Resident Evil 4.
Manhunt (M-rated) -- Game player's character is James Earl Cash, a convicted serial killer facing execution. The execution is ordered to be faked so that a character named "The Director" can use Cash as a star in a series of snuff films. As the Cash character kills other characters, by suffocating them with a plastic bag, slicing them up with a chainsaw, shooting them point blank with a nail gun, stabbing them in the eyeballs with a glass shard, or beheading them with a cleaver, The Director makes sexually vulgar comments. The game has two difficulty settings: fetish and hardcore.
God of War (M-rated) -- Game features disembowelment, mouth-stabbing, eye-gouging, severed limbs, and human sacrifice.
Silent Hill 1-4 -- large portions of these games involve roaming around decaying buildings and beating hideously malformed humanoid monsters to death with blunt instruments.
Condemned -- Requires the player to bludgeon NPC's to death.
The Court of Appeals for the Eighth Circuit declared this to be free speech and struck down a Minnesota law that prohibited minors from purchasing or renting video games bearing a "Mature" or "Adult Only" rating.[4]
See also

Video games
References

↑ http://www.townhall.com/columnists/PhyllisSchlafly/2008/04/07/violent_video_games_held_to_be_free_speech?page=2
↑ http://www.apa.org/science/psa/sb-anderson.html
↑ http://www.qj.net/Study-Violent-games-don-t-alter-normal-kids/pg/49/aid/88522
↑ Entm't Software Ass'n v. Swanson, 2008 U.S. App. LEXIS 5634 (8th Cir. Mar. 17, 2008).

I'm disappointed that the God of War entry doesn't list the whoring, including the button-mashing/sexualizing sequences