Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

this bullshit underlines why I need to delete my profile. the only thing preventing me is that there is some salvageable stuff in emails I've sent there - I could compose my memoirs from stuff written in emails to girls over the past year

this bullshit underlines why I find OKC hilarious and fun. I really want to know what science project they're up to with this.

I imagine that when told they're attractive people send more messages.

good point - would very much be in tune with their sorts of shenanigans

Argh wtf how do you turn this shitty IM thing in the corner off? I went into my profile and in 2 secs flat some prick messages me "isnt trayce a bit of a bogan name?"

Way to sell yourself, twat.

$10 says it was pato

If it was he's using a fake pic (it shows the profile pic when u msg ppl and I didnt recog whoever it was).

what is - "bogan"?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bogan

everything you need to know, and lots you don't

In New Zealand, Waikato University postgraduate student and self professed bogan Dave Snell was awarded nearly $100,000 in 2007 to study the bogan lifestyle. Snell's stance is that enjoyment of heavy metal music is a key element of the bogan lifestyle. Snell explains that bogans express their identity through visible tattoos and clothing choices.[13]

Can we get this guy to post here?

Anyone with the stupendous talent required to get $100,000 to study the bogan lifestyle obv has more lucrative ways to employ his time.

We called 'em booners where I grew up (or "westies" which was the sydney term)

techno/house bogans

There's been times in the past when I've e-mailed (not IMed) girls to point out outrageous things they put in their profile. Like some 4chan type girl wrote that sometimes she gets mistook for being a twelve year old and I asked "are you sure you are not a 12 year old?", and she replied "95% sure". I didn't pursue any further.

were you hoping she actually was not sure?!

No, I wouldn't have ever pursued her. But I impulsively felt the need to tease her for being a dysfunvtional 4chan creep... she deserves for people to think that she is a 12 year old (but she probably only got a kick out of me telling her so... Bleh! those terrible /b/tards)

that's one of those... "the only way to win is not to play" kind of situations

That's one way to reiterate the obvious

Since it came up elsewhere... Myself & the occasionally above-discussed fine young Blake-first-message/Mahler-first-date lady are no more, as of a couple of weeks ago.

I think that I got incredibly lucky to meet someone like that straight away. The first & thus far only date I've ever been on via OKCupid ended up in an at times wonderful 3 month relationship.

I'm pretty certain that its ending was the right thing, but it doesn't stop it being sad, and there are a few doubts in my mind, mainly born of woeful inexperience.

Ah! I sympathise. Was it a distance thing, or were you not compatible in the end?

As said elsewhere, although I've kept my OKC account (purely due to the fact I could easily compile my memoirs from emails exchanged with women over the past year), I am *completely* through with internet dating. Even meeting women with romantic intent from elsewhere on the web is right out. It's been too painful.

It was a question of compatibility for the most part.

Sorry to hear you guys have had bad OKC luck. I'll continue to promote OKC, myself, as I'm now just a few weeks shy of spending half a year with the greatest girl in probably the most stable and happy relationship I've ever had.

I'm very pro OKCupid, I think it's a great site, pretty much regardless of what relationships I do or do not form via it.

trayce he was negging you

Finally manned up and posted a photo, got four visits within 24 hours including one actual message, and it seems like she was repulsed not by the picture, as expected, but by my taste in music. So it goes, I guess.

MALE SLAG

The school boy error of even alluding to meeting in person promptly killed a very promising seeming conversation for me... sad, frustrated face.

I may look like a serial killer, but I certainly don't have the guts to really pull it off. Perhaps I should make this clearer on my profile.

the conversation-killers: John Maus, The Chap, The The. AVOID

but the last 2 of those are brilliant and the first one obscure enough to make conversation about

how can anyone hate the the, like, fuck

how can anyone hate the the, like, fuck

Yeah, that's pretty wtf.

Made a profile a few days ago. Pretty fun distraction so far. Not sure if I'm doing it right.

Still seeing guy from upthread (since early May). All going very well. Talk most days, meeting his friends, met his daughter. But we both left our profiles on the site. I took mine down unilaterally last week and didn't mention it to him. He has not logged on there for ages. Don't want to make a thing of this, but hoping he takes his down soon, or changes to seeking friends only...

how can anyone hate the the, like, fuck

wttf (what the the fuck)

like like the the the fuck

I do, like, like the "the the" fuck

death

I was talking to a female friend of mine who uses OKC as well, expressing my frustrations at the lack of replies to messages I send, let alone anyone messaging me first, and at conversations that start promisingly and then die suddenly in a deafening silence for no fathomable reason. Her tales of what it was like from the perspective of a good looking, intelligent, decent sounding woman on there (being swamped with messages and IMs and a lot of them from perfectly nice looking and seeming guys rather than all-out weirdos) just made me despair even more. The odds one has to fight against. The spark of hope is still there, but it's struggling pretty hard...

PURGE IT FROM YOUR LIFE

I'm really glad that the "horrifying stereotype test" told me I am a bull dyke.

Can't purge! Still hope!

I'm thinking of trying to end my era of procrastination. I have tended to delay, delay, delay getting in touch with people, seemingly interminably, especially those that I find most interesting or attractive, precisely because of that, waiting for some kind of perfect inspiration or moment to strike my message writing skills, which never materialises.

Instead I'm thinking of trying an "act now or not at all" policy, i.e. when I look at a profile I either find them attractive and send a message or I don't and move on. No more of this saving profiles and endlessly revisiting without doing anything.

anyone else get a fucktonne of flash errors on this site? the damn thing is unusable even with flashblock

I think it's about time to delete my profile after seeing firshand what the "attractiveness" does... Not to be shallow or looksist or whatever (beggars can't be choosers, I know) but having the pool of visible users suddenly and drastically drop kind of does a number on the old self-worth. Couldn't they have just given me an email notification reading DAMN BOY YOU UGLY or something instead of being so coy and inoffensive about it?

Being off work last week and in fitting with my abovementioned pro-active plan, I sent a lot of messages compared to my previous usual behaviour. Replies.... zero. Sadness inside... palpable.

I'm aware of the possibility that sending more messages might come hand-in-hand with putting less effort into them and hence them being less likely to garner a reply, but by a lot I mean about one a day, still individually hand-crafted and laboured over.

I find it very frustrating, but I'm loathe to give up, as I've already spent 29 years of my life meeting precisely no-one in Real Life.

None of it does anything to help with the long-standing feeling that in some basic underlying way I am just not made for other people. Fuck this shit.

RENOUNCE INTERNET DATING SRSLY

Waiting for the girl of my dreams to simply drop out of the sky at my feet really wasn't working out though.

I don't know if that's the only other option tbh

a g00d profile strategy is humour and showing that you don't really take the site too seriously. so if yr answering the questions with paragraphs you should probably just tone those down and add a little mystery to em

yet again, I joined okcupid in a burst of enthusiasm and ended up deleting my profile after a couple of weeks. as before, I started off thinking hey this is fun, I'll set up some dates and do some flirting and boost my self-esteem, with no intention of looking for a serious relationship. then, not having enough else to occupy my time, I started to spend too much time thinking about things like how I'm presenting myself, what sort of person I'm looking for and how frustrating it is that I find so very, very few people attractive enough to even give a chance. which triggered an unsettling crisis of confidence and removed all fun from the experience.

krakow, have you thought about branching out to other sites? guardian soulmates seems to have more people looking for relationships as opposed to just casual dating/internet timewasting. the same with any other sites with fees, I suppose.

@darraghmac I am definitely open to other options. I certainly don't seem to meet many people in my life as is though. I'm not a social animal.

@LOLK Wise advice. I do have a propensity for over-elaboration and taking things too seriously. There are some wee jabs of humour in my profile, but I'll bear your thinking in mind, thank you.

@cocotte I thought about the Guardian site, but it seemed really rather expensive, which in my horribly poor state is quite off putting.

A friend of mine did really well with casual dating on the Guardian site, but she’d only signed up in order to compete with a male friend who was pulling hotties. Got to #1 user-ranked and then got bored, or something.

friend and i just had a little chat. she says:

people are just pretty meh about online dating
i think that's the issue
we're all sort of like eh might as well get started on this so i have a backup
but no one our age WANTS to meet on the internet
am i right?

(we're 23)

anyone else feel this way?