Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

Well, depends where on the web. If it's a dating site...

I don't actually think I should take the piss on this thread any more. Too much bad karma.

How many pleasant okc dates with the same person, ending in 'see ya then yep ok see ya' (rather than 'it was kissy') are ok, before the more interested party can reasonably start to think 'put up or stop contacting me'?

Obviously depends on the people, but I am thinking for most people it's about 3 or maybe 4.

2

2 or 3

minutes

2 eh? Dammit. I like this person very much but he unnerves me slightly. Just need a bit more time.

:-) xpost

Some ppl like to take their time, I wouldnt worry overly... but its all about the body language and how they react, too, I think. I wouldnt know, its been years since ive had to go on a date and the very idea is making me feel ill and depressed.

unnerves? How so?

Hard to pinpoint. Might just be nerves. Awkward silences where there should be none? Prob my fault as much as his!

I sometimes fall back on standard questions--(so you like--- hiking, indie movies, music , travel to x...) when silence occurs.

"do you like to fart? are you crazy?"

"so, there's this one ralph wiggum scene, let me ask you..."

cool people write conversation topics on their hand

"so, there's this one ralph wiggum scene, let me ask you..."

LOL so trying this on the next date I end up havening.

Just got an IM out of nowhere at 3 in the morning! She's 21 and a largish state away and just messaged me because she couldn't sleep either, was bored and I came up as a match, so it's obviously not going anywhere, but it helped knock some of the rust off my conversational skills. And now I can get my 4 hours of sleep with a less shitty attitude.

So. Moved to a new city less than two weeks ago, updated my zip code and did nothing else with OK Cupid. End up getting two v. cute girls messaging me. I go out with the first, twice now, and we've hit it off remarkably well, some excellent chemistry, it's very cool. However, before the second date where we really hit it off, I made a coffee date with the second girl. That's tomorrow, and while obviously I'm doing absolutely nothing wrong, I'll be damned if I don't feel screwy and two-timey about it.

Someone yell at me for being neurotic, plz.

You are being neurotic. I am yelling, though you cannot hear me because I am way the hell over here on the other side of the internet.

Yeah make the most of it while you can, for srs :/

Thanking u. My old broody lonely self is kinda not prepared to accept that things are going pretty well atm so I'm kinda looking for things to feel shitty about, I think.

I should probably shut the fuck up.

I'd rather 2 new dates than scraps from the ex Im still living with who is breaking my heart imo.

Ugh, that suuuuuuucks, I'm sorry Trayce. I had an ex living with me for awhile, I ended up moving into my uncles' place for a few months while still paying all the rent, as that shit is untenable.

Yeah, you're being neurotic but I do the same thing so it's cool. Seriously tho - - you have no 'relationship' with the first girl where you'd be two-timing her, and plus the whole premise of your endeavors here is that you're new in town and trying to meet people - - you should feel really great about the fact that you've got more than one thing on your social calendar! Bravo!

She's 21 and a largish state

Hurry up and get on that before ESOJ does [/Pato]

21 bit young for me these days

:D

fwiw I met someone incredibly promising on this yesterday but I'm not going to say any more.

A gap of 5 years is just about the point where I start feeling like a dirty old creep. And she didn't seem interested, anyway, just bored.

Today is the two month anniversary for myself & the wonderful Mahler-as-first-date lady friend...

It's also my birthday.

Excuse me being so happy. :-D

Krakow, I had been waiting for an update but felt I shouldn't ask! Nice one!

HB and congrats, krakow!

(sorry Trayce, that sounds no good at all)

Still seeing Mr Disconcerting, becoming less disconcerted

Trayce has he made any effort towards finding somewhere else?

Hurry up and get on that before ESOJ does [/Pato]

god DAMN it, louis

Is OK Cupid a sort of bargain bucket in web date finding?
I searched my local area and it's everything i wouldn't want to meet!

Today is the two month anniversary for myself & the wonderful Mahler-as-first-date lady friend...

It's also my birthday.

Excuse me being so happy. :-D

― krakow, Tuesday, 11 May 2010 10:51 (3 hours ago)

What about the...um...ummm...

Is OK Cupid a sort of bargain bucket in web date finding?
I searched my local area and it's everything i wouldn't want to meet!

― not_goodwin, Tuesday, May 11, 2010 8:46 AM Bookmark

It seems like a real crapshoot on whether or not particular cities have gone for it, virally speaking. Like for example, Toronto is just bulging with hotties of all stripes but Columbus, you're picking for the diamonds in the rough. Dunno how exactly that happens but it does.

My OkCupid are seems to be a "no signal zone". But en I see kay, I'm curious, do you have pictures showing off some muscles or to give reason for two cuties to message you based on you appearance alone? Are you attractive?

They might have liked his profile and not just his hotnesss!

Maybe, but I'm still curious

I'm a scrawny little dude, so it definitely ain't the muscles. I do have a picture of my tattoo, tough.

I can tell you that when I sat down to write the thing a few months ago, I told myself I'd keep the usual self-deprecation to a minimum.

I usually give smart-ass responses on these dating sites so I don't feel vulnerable, but I actually answered the questions on OKC this go around without a hint of irony or sarcasm. Oh, and I get messages from some really wack individuals - lots of 21-and-22 year old stoners, 45+ renaissance faire workers, bikers, shit like that.

I think I'll be single 4 life!

I tend to e-mail girls that have minimumish self descriptions - I see your point en I see kay.

Last girl that I was e-mailing back and forth didn't reply to my last message over a week ago... I might e-mail one last time and ask her for some kind of confirmation.

She doesn't seem exactly my type (if I had a type) but she's streets ahead of most people in my area code as far as not having some really uncompatible/wack shit on their profiles.

Maybe my profile has a bit much specific stuff and not enough good photos. I really need someone to take a good pic of me instead of my dumb holding a camera at the mirror pics.

is it even possible for a profile not to be horrible? seriously

Capn Lorax, how come I thought you flounced ILX?

Maybe my profile has a bit much specific stuff and not enough good photos. I really need someone to take a good pic of me instead of my dumb holding a camera at the mirror pics.

^This. A good photo is essential. IMO 80% of the impression you will make is based on your pic(s), not your info (unless you post something really off-putting, of course). Get someone who knows what he's doing... a good camera too. I have a nice, not-bad-looking friend who told me he had messaged close to 100 girls without a single reply! Not even "Hi, not interested". I couldn't believe it until I saw his profile pic, he looked like a serial killer.

setting your camera up on a timer also gives the illusion that you have friends who would take photos of you. it is an important illusion. really though. i had to have a recent photo for a site i'm writing for and the process of having a friend take it, photo-shoot style (tho just w natural light), ran the gamut of emotions, lol it is weird and disconcerting having yr photo taken over and over, but did end up with some nice, truthy photos in the end. anyway i can't really deal with okcupid and etc but this is my pro tip regardless.

xp

I flounced for a 2-3 months at one point after I got frustrated in this thread (this thread being a symbol of my own frustrating non-existant love life)

I'm gonna try to get some good photos and maybe even have my friend e-mail me a photo like he said he would a year ago. I have been dieting long enough now that I can finally be photographed for a decent full-length photo. Plus I started going to the gym as of yesterday (and I plan on going back tomorrow)

However maybe I should try Match.com
How is the variety of people on that one?

I might try meeting girls at the gym as well