― Cathy (Cathy), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 13:14 (twenty years ago) link
― colette (a2lette), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 13:24 (twenty years ago) link
Hi Richard, this is Dr Davies, sorry to hear things aren't going so well at the moment. If you come into the surgery I have a new cream you could try, and we can talk about possible surgery.
For some reason we all assumed it was genital related.
― ledge (ledge), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 14:26 (twenty years ago) link
Dad: "Well if its just monkeys then we're not going, because I've seen Monkeys"
Son (lifts head from shoveling chimichanga into face and lazily says): Yeah, you've seen monkeys...but you haven't seen monkeys...a lot.
― Travis Brady, Wednesday, 12 May 2004 21:04 (twenty years ago) link
― Bryan (Bryan), Thursday, 13 May 2004 03:41 (twenty years ago) link
at this point, the two ppl disappeared out of the door to the staircase which leads to the smoking area, so I never heard the rest!
― MarkH (MarkH), Friday, 21 May 2004 12:07 (nineteen years ago) link
Earlier:
"You put it in the green washing up bowl"
"What green washing up bowl?"
"There, in front of the bald man"
― MarkH (MarkH), Monday, 24 May 2004 09:56 (nineteen years ago) link
― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:26 (nineteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 May 2004 14:21 (nineteen years ago) link
― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 24 May 2004 14:48 (nineteen years ago) link
― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Monday, 24 May 2004 20:00 (nineteen years ago) link
― Rickey Wright (Rrrickey), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 00:16 (nineteen years ago) link
― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 19:58 (nineteen years ago) link
Girl: It’s weird, in my new story the main character is addicted to coffee and I don’t even drink coffee!Guy: Maybe the coffee is a metaphor.Girl: Oh yeah.
2. Sometime in 02
Girl 1: My mom called me an “atheist” this morning, can you believe that?Girl 2: She thinks you worship the devil and stuff?Girl 1: Nooo, that’s Wiccan!
― David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 21:39 (nineteen years ago) link
― King Kobra (King Kobra), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 21:44 (nineteen years ago) link
"Only children are the worst. Everyone I know with issues is an only child."
I wince and go back to reading my book but before I leave the same girl, who has been slagging off her bf and his family for the last 20 minutes says,
"Well, I think that families that yoga together, stay together."
First time I've heard yoga as a verb.
― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 20:52 (nineteen years ago) link
-- g--ff (webmail), April 19th, 2004 11:55 PM. (gcannon)
G--ff! This was in Minneapolis, wasn't it? I used to live off of Columbus, near Franklin & Chicago. Right behind the morphine clinic!
― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:36 (nineteen years ago) link
― AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:38 (nineteen years ago) link
― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:47 (nineteen years ago) link
Well, I think that families that yoga together, stay together.
My aunt is a very well respected yoga teacher and so insane at family gatherings that I avoid her like the plague.
― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:49 (nineteen years ago) link
Maybe he was just negotiating with one of his other personalities.
― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Wednesday, 4 August 2004 00:29 (nineteen years ago) link
"The end of July"
"Oh, so next year, then?"
"No this year."
"But we're in August now"
"oh yeah!"
― MarkH (MarkH), Friday, 6 August 2004 13:22 (nineteen years ago) link
1: It's not pronunced "Porsh" it's "Porsha".2: Is it?1: Yeh man, if you go for a job interview with Porsche and pronounce it wrong then you don't get a job. You have to pronounce it "Porsha"2: Didn't know that1: Yeh, they'll be all like "Fuck off mate - it's Porsha".
― dog latin (dog latin), Friday, 6 August 2004 14:01 (nineteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 August 2004 14:05 (nineteen years ago) link
Coworker1: How far up does it go?Coworker2: Pretty much all the way. I've got to put my medication on it now, if you want to see it.Coworker1: YEAH! We should tell Nick to stay in his room for a few minutes, though.
― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 6 August 2004 14:09 (nineteen years ago) link
Man: "god, I havent been here since the last time we were here!"
― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 12 August 2004 22:57 (nineteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 12 August 2004 23:03 (nineteen years ago) link
― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 12 August 2004 23:29 (nineteen years ago) link
Student 1: Oh, what was it? ... that Marvin Gaye did?Student 2: Lovely Day?Student 1: No... um, Sexual Healing, that's it![both sing brief snatch of Sexual Healing]Student 1: APPARENTLY, he was SHOT. By his DAD.Student 2: Really!!???Student 1: Yeah, for being gay I think.Student 2: And he was *called* Gaye. Weird. His dad didn't shoot him because he was CALLED Gaye, did he?Student 1: No that would be stupid, he had the same name.
― Archel (Archel), Friday, 13 August 2004 07:51 (nineteen years ago) link
― RJG (RJG), Friday, 13 August 2004 08:05 (nineteen years ago) link
Woman: (smiling) It was good. Very good.Man: (looking pensive for a split second and then correcting his wife's ungroovy lingo) - It was COOL. Very COOL.
― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 1 September 2004 08:44 (nineteen years ago) link
Coworker1: Do you think Angelina Jolie would do a sex scene?Coworker2: I'm pretty sure she already has...um...Coworker1: I bet she would.Coworker2: That's what I'm saying, I think she has, I've SEEN it.Coworker1: I bet she'd do a three-way.Coworker2: ORIGINAL SIN! That's what it was called.Coworker1: I bet she'd do a sex-scene with her brother.Coworker2: You need to stop thinking about this for a second.
― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 2 September 2004 18:11 (nineteen years ago) link
mother: Yes, all good reporters use pencils.daughter: what do bad reporters use then?mother: ...biros
― rainy (rainy), Thursday, 2 September 2004 22:05 (nineteen years ago) link
― Rickey Wright (Rrrickey), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:02 (nineteen years ago) link
My mum and I were walking the dog and talking about how we'd off my father (semi-jokingly)...walked around a hill and there were a bunch of people sitting there looking a bit stunned.
Ah well.
― papa november (papa november), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:09 (nineteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:16 (nineteen years ago) link
― papa november (papa november), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:23 (nineteen years ago) link
YOU CUNT!!!!
Two uncomfortable seconds later:
...do that! You cunt. You simply cunt. I don't beleef you.
― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:26 (nineteen years ago) link
― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:29 (nineteen years ago) link
― gem (trisk), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:34 (nineteen years ago) link
-- mark s (mar...), September 5th, 2001
Upon reflection, an accurate assessment.
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 28 January 2005 02:53 (nineteen years ago) link
I say this all the time. I think it started as a joke, but today I said "I haven't talked to you since last time!" without thinking anything of it until afterwards.
― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 28 January 2005 03:07 (nineteen years ago) link
Best thread ever.
― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Friday, 28 January 2005 03:31 (nineteen years ago) link
Guy1: Guess who I saw at the mall the other day.Guy2: Um...who?Guy1: Richie Sambora!Guy2: Didya now?
― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 March 2005 14:41 (nineteen years ago) link
― Ken L (Ken L), Thursday, 17 March 2005 15:02 (nineteen years ago) link
Woman 1: So... how do you know when to turn the CD over?Woman 2: You don't, it's just one side.W1: So... what's the other side for?W2: ...W1: And how do you know which side is which?W2: Well, sometimes the blank side has, I don't know, manufacturer's information on it or something.
WTF? I mean Woman 1 was fairly elderly but even so...
― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 17 March 2005 15:06 (nineteen years ago) link
"I'm outside the toilet just now...........yeah, I'm absolutely bursting.............do you dare me?"
― Rumpsy Pumpsy (Rumpie), Thursday, 17 March 2005 18:19 (nineteen years ago) link
― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 18 March 2005 06:36 (nineteen years ago) link