You guys who have probs w/loosening lugnuts need to learn to keep a can of WD-40 in your trunk. Works miracles.
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, December 10, 2009 2:11 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
also lol hit the nuts w/yr tire iron
― Richard Snorkeling (ice cr?m), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:27 (fourteen years ago) link
"hit the nuts" is often good advice when you don't know what else to do
― wtf?!? just randomly started crying! (HI DERE), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:27 (fourteen years ago) link
i dunno, sometimes it takes a gentle touch
― eight woofers in the trunk sb'n down the block (M@tt He1ges0n), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:28 (fourteen years ago) link
Guys don't break the surface tension -- we'll all drown.
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:28 (fourteen years ago) link
Back on the lists of useful things. This was a cover story on a ish of Popular Mechanics that I did pick up for the Christmas flight to the parents'.
100 Skills Every Man Should Know: 2008's Ultimate DIY List
http://media.popularmechanics.com/images/tool-fist-470-1008.jpg
Their list?
Automotive1. Handle a blowout2. Drive in snow3. Check trouble codes4. Replace fan belt5. Wax a car6. Conquer an off-road obstacle7. Use a stick welder8. Hitch up a trailer9. Jump start a carHandling Emergencies10. Perform the Heimlich11. Reverse hypothermia12. Perform hands-only CPR13. Escape a sinking carHome14. Carve a turkey15. Use a sewing machine16. Put out a fire17. Home brew beer18. Remove bloodstains from fabric19. Move heavy stuff20. Grow food21. Read an electric meter22. Shovel the right way23. Solder wire24. Tape drywall25. Split firewood26. Replace a faucet washer27. Mix concrete28. Paint a straight line29. Use a French knife30. Prune bushes and small trees31. Iron a shirt32. Fix a toilet tank flapper33. Change a single-pole switch34. Fell a tree35. Replace a broken windowpane36. Set up a ladder, safely37. Fix a faucet cartridge38. Sweat copper tubing39. Change a diaper40. Grill with charcoal41. Sew a button on a shirt42. Fold a flagMedical Myths43. Treat frostbite44. Treat a burn45. Help a seizure victim46. Treat a snakebite47. Remove a tickMilitary Know-How48. Shine shoes49. Make a drum-tight bed50. Drop and give the perfect pushupOutdoors51. Run rapids in a canoe52. Hang food in the wild53. Skipper a boat54. Shoot straight55. Tackle steep drops on a mountain bike56. Escape a rip currentPrimitive Skills57. Build a fire in the wilderness58. Build a shelter59. Find potable waterSurviving Extremes60. Floods61. Tornados62. Cold63. Heat64. LightningTeach Your Kids65. Cast a line66. Lend a hand67. Change a tire68. Throw a spiral69. Fly a stunt kite70. Drive a stick shift71. Parallel park72. Tie a bowline73. Tie a necktie74. Whittle75. Ride a bikeTechnology76. Install a graphics card77. Take the perfect portrait78. Calibrate HDTV settings79. Shoot a home movie80. Ditch your hard driveMaster Key Workshop Tools81. Drill driver82. Grease gun83. Coolant hydrometer84. Socket wrench85. Test light86. Brick trowel87. Framing hammer88. Wood chisel89. Spade bit90. Circular saw91. Sledge hammer92. Hacksaw93. Torque wrench94. Air wrench95. Infrared thermometer96. Sand blaster97. Crosscut saw98. Hand plane99. Multimeter100. Feeler gauges
Handling Emergencies10. Perform the Heimlich11. Reverse hypothermia12. Perform hands-only CPR13. Escape a sinking car
Home14. Carve a turkey15. Use a sewing machine16. Put out a fire17. Home brew beer18. Remove bloodstains from fabric19. Move heavy stuff20. Grow food21. Read an electric meter22. Shovel the right way23. Solder wire24. Tape drywall25. Split firewood26. Replace a faucet washer27. Mix concrete28. Paint a straight line29. Use a French knife30. Prune bushes and small trees31. Iron a shirt32. Fix a toilet tank flapper33. Change a single-pole switch34. Fell a tree35. Replace a broken windowpane36. Set up a ladder, safely37. Fix a faucet cartridge38. Sweat copper tubing39. Change a diaper40. Grill with charcoal41. Sew a button on a shirt42. Fold a flag
Medical Myths43. Treat frostbite44. Treat a burn45. Help a seizure victim46. Treat a snakebite47. Remove a tick
Military Know-How48. Shine shoes49. Make a drum-tight bed50. Drop and give the perfect pushup
Outdoors51. Run rapids in a canoe52. Hang food in the wild53. Skipper a boat54. Shoot straight55. Tackle steep drops on a mountain bike56. Escape a rip current
Primitive Skills57. Build a fire in the wilderness58. Build a shelter59. Find potable water
Surviving Extremes60. Floods61. Tornados62. Cold63. Heat64. Lightning
Teach Your Kids65. Cast a line66. Lend a hand67. Change a tire68. Throw a spiral69. Fly a stunt kite70. Drive a stick shift71. Parallel park72. Tie a bowline73. Tie a necktie74. Whittle75. Ride a bike
Technology76. Install a graphics card77. Take the perfect portrait78. Calibrate HDTV settings79. Shoot a home movie80. Ditch your hard drive
Master Key Workshop Tools81. Drill driver82. Grease gun83. Coolant hydrometer84. Socket wrench85. Test light86. Brick trowel87. Framing hammer88. Wood chisel89. Spade bit90. Circular saw91. Sledge hammer92. Hacksaw93. Torque wrench94. Air wrench95. Infrared thermometer96. Sand blaster97. Crosscut saw98. Hand plane99. Multimeter100. Feeler gauges
― kingfish, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:37 (fourteen years ago) link
lol some of those are hilariously wrong
― call all destroyer, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:38 (fourteen years ago) link
i am eliminating entire sections of that list in my mind
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:39 (fourteen years ago) link
Where to begin, even
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:39 (fourteen years ago) link
18. Remove bloodstains from fabric
^^^i like how it's specifically bloodstains and not like wine or grape juice or a multitude of others
― you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon (omar little), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:40 (fourteen years ago) link
i think "brew beer" HAS to be the worst
― call all destroyer, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:41 (fourteen years ago) link
xp I don't much like that at all.
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:41 (fourteen years ago) link
And it's interesting to read the reactions from an actual tech-heavy DIY group
― kingfish, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:43 (fourteen years ago) link
bloodstain advice shoulda been listed closer to "crosscut saw."
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:44 (fourteen years ago) link
101. Cancel magazine subscription
― Richard Snorkeling (ice cr?m), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:45 (fourteen years ago) link
as i'm reading it's just....no. no. no. arguably. no.
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:45 (fourteen years ago) link
50. Drop and give the perfect pushup
this is a terrible gift idea
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:46 (fourteen years ago) link
drop and give a perfect pushup wtf
― voices from the manstep (brownie), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:47 (fourteen years ago) link
72. Tie a bowline73. Tie a necktie
tie a bowtie is harder than both
― cozwn, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:47 (fourteen years ago) link
I live in Texas. Knowing how to drive in the snow is only slightly more useful than knowing how to survive in the post-nuclear holocaust mutant wasteland.
― smashing aspirant (milo z), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:48 (fourteen years ago) link
39. Change a diaper40. Grill with charcoal
proximity of these two steps is disconcerting
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:48 (fourteen years ago) link
69. Fly a stunt kite
roffle roffle
― elmo leonard (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:48 (fourteen years ago) link
This made me chuckle. Just one? Are we really that flabby?
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:49 (fourteen years ago) link
ayo brownie how come you are not over in muni lot with the rest of the Browns tailgaters?
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:49 (fourteen years ago) link
whittle
― voices from the manstep (brownie), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:49 (fourteen years ago) link
xxp I think of Bill Murray in Stripes. He did five.
busy whittlin', pancakes
Surviving Extremes63. Heat
step 1: remove excess clothingstep 2: drink water step 3: get under something to block big fireball in sky
still hot? repeat steps 1-3 until not as hot
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:50 (fourteen years ago) link
bowties aren't terribly complicated but they do require a bit of practice
― elmo leonard (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:50 (fourteen years ago) link
And i wonder where something like this fits on the manly<--->bro gradient. You're still making something with your hands, after all. Even if it is chainmail made from beer tabs.
http://blog.makezine.com/beercantabarmor_cc.jpg
― kingfish, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:50 (fourteen years ago) link
okay, so the military things we need to know do not include unarmed combat, weapons training, tactics, ballistics, crowd control, or any of the actual cool military stuff, but rather the stuff that your dad made you do on Saturdays when he was irritated that you'd spent all morning watching cartoons
― wtf?!? just randomly started crying! (HI DERE), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:51 (fourteen years ago) link
xxp So do regular ties, tbh, if you want that perfect dimple.
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:51 (fourteen years ago) link
53. Skipper a boat
http://sixcharacters.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/skipper.jpg?w=190&h=240
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:51 (fourteen years ago) link
19. Move heavy stuff
lol at this being a "skill" you might now "know"
― retrovaporized nebulizer (╓abies), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:52 (fourteen years ago) link
102. fashion lionel richie head from clay
― cozwn, Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:52 (fourteen years ago) link
59. Find potable water
fucking 4/20 man
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:53 (fourteen years ago) link
112. Be dumb as stump117. Crush beer can on head141. Crush enemies150. Hear lamentations of women
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:54 (fourteen years ago) link
102. sire an heir
― elmo leonard (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:54 (fourteen years ago) link
103. Hire Slayer
― jazzgasms (Mr. Que), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:55 (fourteen years ago) link
but honestly, surviving tornadoes? "son, if you see a tornado, i want you to look him in the eye and just say no. it was nice talking to you, see you next christmas."
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:55 (fourteen years ago) link
104. Invoke "Droit de seigneur" on all your friends' fiancees.
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:55 (fourteen years ago) link
105. Fence
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:56 (fourteen years ago) link
106. master the art of sincere apology even if you do not give a fuck irl
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:57 (fourteen years ago) link
80. Ditch your hard drive
Do what with it? You mean, throw it in a ditch? I think I might like to wipe it, reformat it, and see if I can use it again first.
― Cronenberg sleazy (kenan), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:58 (fourteen years ago) link
187. self-administer a prostate exam
― elmo leonard (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:59 (fourteen years ago) link
for a second i thought it read "pantone" and i was all who is this guy
― Richard Snorkeling (ice cr?m), Thursday, 10 December 2009 20:00 (fourteen years ago) link
188. self-diagnose prostate cancer
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 20:00 (fourteen years ago) link
See, I thought it said "Fatone" and I was like, uhhhhh . . .
ps to brownie apparently there is a wedding scheduled for 3:30 in the muni lot amongst the idiots Browns fans
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 20:03 (fourteen years ago) link
195. commandeer the vehicle of a stranger by force (non-video game)
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Thursday, 10 December 2009 20:09 (fourteen years ago) link
6. Conquer an off-road obstacle
can this include alcoholism?
12. Perform hands-only CPR
Real men give mouth-to-mouth
― Brad C., Thursday, 10 December 2009 20:10 (fourteen years ago) link