ILX Parenting 6: "Put Some Goddamn Pants On Before You Go Outside!" is a thing I say now

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have at it

Οὖτις, Friday, 10 July 2015 19:51 (five years ago) link

"because I'M the parent!" is a thing *I* say now.

UYD: Oxys, Percs, Vics, Addys, Rit-Dogs and Xannys (sunny successor), Friday, 10 July 2015 20:47 (five years ago) link

I find myself saying giving the weirdest instructions sometimes

Οὖτις, Friday, 10 July 2015 21:00 (five years ago) link

completely frivolous post but: ex-coworker pregnant w second baby. she's naming it "Macyn" and I am pretty IA about it tbh

ugh. just call the fuckin kid mason jeeeeeeezus christ almighty

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 14 July 2015 19:48 (five years ago) link

boy or girl? I'm guessing girl.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Tuesday, 14 July 2015 22:50 (five years ago) link

just intentionally mispronounce it from now on

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 14 July 2015 23:00 (five years ago) link

"makin? like yr makin a baby?"

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 14 July 2015 23:00 (five years ago) link

we've moved beyond the "why" stage to the "no" or simply ignoring stage which is slowly sapping my will to live and/or self-image as a nice guy

transparent play for gifs (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 15 July 2015 12:53 (five years ago) link

Hey all. Haven't been around for a while but K now has a baby sister, E. 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧

five six and (man alive), Thursday, 16 July 2015 00:58 (five years ago) link

Good job.

Jeff, Thursday, 16 July 2015 01:02 (five years ago) link

Oh yay! I was just thinking about you, man alive, and hoping you'd come back and say hello. Congratulations!

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 01:45 (five years ago) link

Aw! Nice to not be forgotten by ILXORs, at least a few nice ones.

five six and (man alive), Thursday, 16 July 2015 01:47 (five years ago) link

yes you were missed dude

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 02:12 (five years ago) link

we even posted in the ilx milk carton thread a while back iirc

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 02:13 (five years ago) link

anyways good to have a new thread

J is starting to ask "what is ____" about everything, it is really cool, like he is really trying to get at the deeper meaning of it, e.g. he has been eating oatmeal for a good two years now but now he wants to really know "what is oatmeal???"

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 02:15 (five years ago) link

haha also xp man alive i misread your post to say "K now has a babysitter, E" so i did not comment b/c that seemed unremarkable, but yea congratulations!

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 02:24 (five years ago) link

So yeah, two kids is pretty crazy. OTOH in the final months before the birth I hustled hard and found a better job -- better pay AND more flexible with time, and that's been making things a lot easier.

five six and (man alive), Thursday, 16 July 2015 03:13 (five years ago) link

Oh awesome! Congratulations on the new job AND the new baby!

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 03:17 (five years ago) link

yeah two kids is nuts. fwiw three is not as nuts as two is, in case you're inclined in that way

we just flew back to the usa for a couple of weeks and my kids did well, but then my youngest is 8 so why would it be bad. tons of movies on demand with the little screens, they keep bringing you food and drinks, you get to snuggle, what's not to like.

droit au butt (Euler), Thursday, 16 July 2015 12:01 (five years ago) link

fwiw three is not as nuts as two

this needs explaination

UYD: Oxys, Percs, Vics, Addys, Rit-Dogs and Xannys (sunny successor), Thursday, 16 July 2015 17:36 (five years ago) link

two is fucking crazy

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:45 (five years ago) link

I assume when you have three you let the oldest child be in charge of the other two. Parenting over!

Οὖτις, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:46 (five years ago) link

im dying here w/ 2, it is intense

my mom had 5 and i just can't even comprehend that

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:48 (five years ago) link

i think maybe people who say the jump to 3 is not a big deal is maybe because at that point the older ones are a little more manageable since they are older?

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:49 (five years ago) link

also some of you may recall i mentioned J's autism diagnosis on the previous thread, things were super stressful for a long while especially after F's birth but things do seem to be falling into place a little w/ his services and planning for preschool next year. we found some really incredible home-based therapists and b/c of his diagnosis J also got offered a spot at one of our city's best public schools allowing us to bypass some of the anxiety-inducing byzantine lottery process. one benefit i guess to having a kid with special needs. also J is just doing amazingly well right now and we've seen so much growth and progress, it is really hopeful.

marcos, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:54 (five years ago) link

Oh good! That's good to hear.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 19:21 (five years ago) link

Thanks for the update Marcos, that's good to hear.
My friend with 3 kids says the jump to 3 is the craziest ever. You only have 2 hands for a start!

kinder, Thursday, 16 July 2015 19:44 (five years ago) link

Yeah I've heard that 3 is the hardest - harder than two, harder than four.

LOL survey says - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/07/three-children-is-most-st_n_3229032.html

I think we'll stick with one to be on the safe side.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 19:58 (five years ago) link

http://adequateman.deadspin.com/14-things-you-will-say-to-your-kids-a-million-goddamn-t-1717985943

I would add "Put on your shoes" to this list.

Immediate Follower (NA), Thursday, 16 July 2015 20:11 (five years ago) link

Ivy's only 19 months so some of those don't apply but we're already well on our way with "Careful," "You're fine," and "Don't eat that."

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 20:16 (five years ago) link

yeah I dunno with #3, #1 was already 6 years old, so didn't need the kind of management that newborns do, and got along well with #2 so our lives were fine. plus we knew what we were doing by that point, at least as well as we ever were going to. but when #2 was born...I don't know how we survived tbh

droit au butt (Euler), Thursday, 16 July 2015 20:44 (five years ago) link

Oh god, "careful!" is getting a lot of use now, as well as the related "gentle hands!" F's top three words are "no", "nono" and "nonononononono".

Madchen, Thursday, 16 July 2015 20:55 (five years ago) link

"Did you take another bite of your dinner yet?"

how's life, Thursday, 16 July 2015 21:03 (five years ago) link

Ivy's daycare teachers use the Spanish "linda" to mean "nicely," which Ivy picked up on early so we say that instead of "gentle hands." And we say that a lot... Also my mom's old favorite: People are not for hitting. People are for loving. Usually said through gritted teeth after Ivy smacks my glasses off my face.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 21:15 (five years ago) link

our perfect granddaughter, who always slept through the night even from birth and has never been the slightest bit difficult during year one, has FINALLY has her first tantrum, tried to scratch her mom with her little fingernails. we breathed a sigh of relief tbh, thank god she's not some pod person experiment and is actually human.

I have a couple of new Isolde pics as well, will post later

sleeve, Thursday, 16 July 2015 21:31 (five years ago) link

Damn straight.

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Thursday, 16 July 2015 22:00 (five years ago) link

"gentle hands" wtf does that mean, like what is the situation

transparent play for gifs (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 16 July 2015 23:47 (five years ago) link

pets?

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 16 July 2015 23:48 (five years ago) link

ime it is another way of saying "don't scratch my fucking face, boy"

marcos, Friday, 17 July 2015 00:06 (five years ago) link

Yeah like "don't hit scratch slap pinch me/your dad/this other child/the cat."

from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Friday, 17 July 2015 00:39 (five years ago) link

"What did I just say?" is another thing I say a lot.

Οὖτις, Friday, 17 July 2015 02:39 (five years ago) link

I've been trying to get a little more real about "rules" lately, especially with eating, e.g. I keep repeating "we don't get something else until we finish what we have," because she has a really annoying habit of asking for something, taking a few bites and then asking for another thing. Also trying to stop snacks in the stroller and carseat so she'll actually eat her goddamn meals instead of snacking all the time, but that one is challenging (because on the morning where she DOESN'T eat her goddamn breakfast, you feel guilty sending her to school hungry).

five six and (man alive), Friday, 17 July 2015 04:51 (five years ago) link

Also we have a grandparent who sees her every week and undermines all this

five six and (man alive), Friday, 17 July 2015 04:51 (five years ago) link

gah, that thing when your newborn is finally asleep and completely quiet and then you keep checking every twenty minutes to make sure they're alive.

five six and (man alive), Friday, 17 July 2015 05:02 (five years ago) link

:)

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 July 2015 05:19 (five years ago) link

double congratulations, man alive!

estela, Friday, 17 July 2015 05:28 (five years ago) link

small man still alive

wisdom be leakin out my louche douche truths (k3vin k.), Friday, 17 July 2015 05:29 (five years ago) link

So I may have missed something, but I think Nora only woke at midnight and 3am last night. It's 7am now and she's still asleep. And it's Em's birthday.

Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Friday, 17 July 2015 06:18 (five years ago) link

Ha, I slept straight through a 5am waking..,

Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Friday, 17 July 2015 06:24 (five years ago) link

Happy birthday Em. I was just thinking I hadn't seen her over at the other place for a while. If it's any consolation, our sleep has gone back into a bad pattern after having a really good thing going for a couple of months. Hoping we find that groove again.

kinder, Friday, 17 July 2015 08:33 (five years ago) link

(mis-post deleted)

stet, Wednesday, 10 June 2020 15:41 (eleven months ago) link

chinaski, sorry that was meant to imply that they get better when they're no longer yr9 boys!

kinder, Wednesday, 10 June 2020 15:41 (eleven months ago) link

That's what I took it to mean, kinder - here's hoping! I see (well, saw) upwards of 80 Y9s every week and have a range of archetypes. My boy seems to be a new archetype; may indeed be a new species, as yet undiscovered by science.

I'm suspicious of the way educationalists use neuroscience in a hand-wavy way, but I'd love to get a look inside an adolescent's brain, just to see what the actual fuck is going on. I bet it's like the Somme in there.

Vanishing Point (Chinaski), Wednesday, 10 June 2020 15:50 (eleven months ago) link

We have let our teen go out to see his friends since the beginning of this. He has one group that he was hanging out with, and they spent a couple months building bike jumps in one guy's backyard. It was not ideal, but I've known from having to ground him a few times recently that keeping him in the house really effects his mental health. And I know from arguments in years previous about wearing bike helmets and wearing shorts in 30 degree weather that he's way too stubborn for me when rationality doesn't prevail.

We've kept the daughter with us and tried to give her as much space as she needs. She has used this space to obsessively watch video game youtubers. We'll take her out on walks to her favorite places around the neighborhood and stuff. Last week she got to see two of her friends and it was a great little test run. One family only let us hang for a brief 15-minute outdoor visit. The other one we spent an hour or two at one of our local beaches.

peace, man, Wednesday, 10 June 2020 17:47 (eleven months ago) link

There's an Australian play called "year 9 are animals" which we studied when I was in high school :) Its true!

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 11 June 2020 06:13 (eleven months ago) link

two weeks pass...

I'm so happy. We bought my teenager a drumset last night. Used, off of one of his friend's parents. Some cheap no-name brand that doesn't even exist anymore, as far as I can tell. But he's in there practicing and trying to figure things out now. I had really been worried about how he's been spending his free time, because other than building bmx jumps in the woods, his hobbies have sort of consisted of smoking pot, CS:GO, watching Netflix, and being at anyone else's house other than ours. He played violin for a couple years in elementary school and I showed him how to play Smoke on the Water or something once on guitar, but that didn't really stick. I love the sound of kids making music.

peace, man, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 12:18 (ten months ago) link

That is awesome!
My 5-year-old has been having piano lessons with my mom (a piano teacher) a couple of days a week for the past few months and he’s reading music now! So he’s officially learned to read music before he’s learned to read words ha! I’m fine with that.

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 1 July 2020 21:42 (ten months ago) link

two weeks pass...

I think my kid took the piss out of me for the first time today. She’s ten months. She snatched the book I normally read to her out of my hands, opened it out, and started “reading” to me in a mock-pompous voice.

Chuck_Tatum, Friday, 17 July 2020 19:20 (nine months ago) link

get used to it!

scampo, foggy and clegg (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 17 July 2020 19:49 (nine months ago) link

...boomer

DJI, Friday, 17 July 2020 20:22 (nine months ago) link

My 11yr old (going on 25yr old) tagged me in her Instagram story today as the 'most boring person in her life'.

Vanishing Point (Chinaski), Friday, 17 July 2020 20:48 (nine months ago) link

I mean, she's probably right but OUCH.

Vanishing Point (Chinaski), Friday, 17 July 2020 20:49 (nine months ago) link

hahaha lmao

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Friday, 17 July 2020 20:53 (nine months ago) link

haha

kinder, Friday, 17 July 2020 21:01 (nine months ago) link

I’m down to only two teenagers today, like, forever. It’s weird.

Joey Corona (Euler), Friday, 17 July 2020 23:13 (nine months ago) link

one month passes...

Two days into the new term and I’m trying to get anti-climb paint out of a school sweatshirt fml.

Madchen, Friday, 4 September 2020 15:32 (eight months ago) link

“It kind of happened magically” at playtime, according to F. His new teacher was veeeeerrrrrry apologetic.

Madchen, Friday, 4 September 2020 15:33 (eight months ago) link

Recommending things to your kid: classic or impossible?

My older kid, I rarely had any influence over. His mom had more luck than I did. I've had mild success with introducing my fourth-grader to things. She went on a big Homestar Runner kick last year and earlier this summer we enjoyed Avatar: The Last Airbender together when it came to Netflix. These days, her tastes run almost entirely toward Minecraft and Five Nights at Freddy's youtubers.

I can't get her to read a book with me anymore. And I respect that she wants to choose things for herself. She's been big on Warrior cats books and reads them and enthusiastically discusses them with me about them when she's done. But anything that I loved as a child and I try to introduce to her - C.S. Lewis, Madeleine L'Engle, etc. - I get shut down with a firm "no", which I honor and respect but... Anyone know any tricks, or do I just respect that Warrior cats are the new classics and give the fuck up?

peace, man, Sunday, 13 September 2020 23:20 (eight months ago) link

Warrior Cats are a phase that will pass. Generally think people should come to classics because they want to, not as an "eat your vegetables" thing that parents do. You've done your job by letting the kid know about them.

School may require some specific reading, and sometimes hearing it from a different authority works better.

velcro-magnon (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 13 September 2020 23:44 (eight months ago) link

Fair enough. To be clear though from my perspective , I'm not approaching/proposing these things from "eat your veg" as much as "I want to enjoy this thing with you".

peace, man, Sunday, 13 September 2020 23:47 (eight months ago) link

I've found it very hit & miss - some stick others get dismissed after one or two episodes/chapters.

Sometimes it also seems to be about catching them at the right time - first time I tried Avatar with my son he wasn't really interested but then gave it another go a couple of months later and he was hooked.

groovypanda, Monday, 14 September 2020 06:20 (eight months ago) link

"I want to enjoy this thing with you".

Oh yeah, I totally get that! My wife and I were thrilled when our daughter put down the Warriors for a bit and picked up Wrinkle in Time. We tried not to show it too much, though. Our acting like eager puppies over her enjoyment of something we can share can have a backlash effect in tweens (just as much as teens).

I should add that she got into L'Engle not because we'd lobbied for her to do so (see above) but to be in a school play.

This is complicated for me because my family of origin definitely had canonical movies and books and musicals that we felt obligated to like Or Else. It was only as an adult that I realized what a dud that can be, how limiting and prescriptive. I spent a lot of time feeling that my taste should align with my parents' taste in order to think of myself as cultured, when sometimes I probably would have been better off finding out what *I* liked on my own.

Also I'm sure there were people in my family that kinda resented how much of our interaction was based around certain references and in-jokes and quotes from "Auntie Mame" or whatever. Stepsiblings and new spouses and such who either felt left out, or who felt they needed to wlbe given a read/watch list before they could participate.

The ritual of "you haven't seen Princess Bride (or whatever)?!?! We need to rectify this immediately!" can be well-intentioned and feel like generosity and a desire for shared enjoyment. But it can also feel stifling, and I've deliberately kept that to a minimum with my kids.

That said, they live in a house with thousands of books and people eager to talk passionately about each one. If they become interested in something great under their own steam mand following their own curiosity, the joy is more real.

velcro-magnon (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 14 September 2020 10:08 (eight months ago) link

otm.

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Monday, 14 September 2020 10:18 (eight months ago) link

I don't think any Onion article has haunted me as much as this one.

https://www.theonion.com/cool-dad-raising-daughter-on-media-that-will-put-her-en-1819572981

Nevertheless daughter number one has started telling me that none of her friends ever get the movie or music references she drops (tho the last one was to School of Rock for pity's sake).

Piedie Gimbel, Monday, 14 September 2020 10:32 (eight months ago) link

my kids currently only listen to minecraft parody songs, not sure if this is a disaster or not

这是我的显示名称 (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Monday, 14 September 2020 10:46 (eight months ago) link

Yes, we are firmly in Minecraft parody territory. I'm fine with that and watching some youtubers like Preston or Slogoman or LaurenZSide. She's been down a rabbithole watching Gacha Life vids recently though, and I haven't said it aloud to her, but they are the absolutely dregs.

peace, man, Monday, 14 September 2020 11:48 (eight months ago) link

my kids watch Mr Beast and he’s the fucking worst

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Monday, 14 September 2020 11:50 (eight months ago) link

I have had more than enough of hearing about "Preson Styles Merch" and have banned him, BeckBroJack too.

这是我的显示名称 (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Monday, 14 September 2020 11:56 (eight months ago) link

Aw, I mean, these guys are annoying don't get me wrong, but when I was my daughter's age I was either watching genuine neon-orange effluvia on Nickelodeon or sneaking over to MTV in hopes of catching the Britney Fox 'Girlschool' video. But yes, I have purchased Preston Stylez merch in the past two months.

peace, man, Monday, 14 September 2020 12:07 (eight months ago) link

Lol @ Piedie Gimbel

velcro-magnon (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 14 September 2020 12:51 (eight months ago) link

Has anyone else had experience with their kid, particularly a young kid (kindergartner in my case) being mean to other kids? We have had the experience multiple times when we will set up a playdate and E will decide in advance she doesn't like the kid, refusing to share anything, refuses to show her room to the kid, refuses to play, says rude things on purpose, etc. We try to model being good hosts and being friendly, we try gently reminding her how to be nice, and we have tried sterner approaches too, but none work because she has clearly set her mind against the playdate and on not being nice. In fact, sometimes the more we encourage her to be nice, the worse she gets. We did move recently so it may partly be a control thing, but it happened before we moved too. I'm not sure what to do and it makes me afraid to set up playdates with other kids - today she made a girl we invited cry.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Sunday, 27 September 2020 17:06 (seven months ago) link

No real advice, but I've noticed that with playdates, the kid whose house (and toys) it is, generally ends up being difficult. the same kids are fine going to the other's place. leaving can be fraught too even if they're having a good time. is kindergarten age 4/5?

kinder, Sunday, 27 September 2020 18:02 (seven months ago) link

three months pass...

ILX Parenting 6: "Put Some Goddamn Pants On Before You Go Outside!" is a thing I say now

Over the past few months, my 16-year-old has just stopped wearing shirts around the house. Just now I was about to exhort him to "put a goddamn shirt on before he opens the refrigerator" but I'm just gonna give up and let him do whatever the hell he wants because these times are hard enough on everyone.

peace, man, Monday, 4 January 2021 20:15 (four months ago) link

oh i have to bribe my two boys to put on anything more than underwear.

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Monday, 4 January 2021 20:59 (four months ago) link

Mine think shorts are year-round apparel

calstars, Monday, 4 January 2021 21:45 (four months ago) link

Oh yeah, when he got to be around 10 or 11, my wife would have huge fights with him in the morning because he didn't want to wear jeans in sub-freezing weather. Wasn't a thing when I was a kid, but apparently it is the standard for tween boys these days.

peace, man, Monday, 4 January 2021 21:49 (four months ago) link

guess what happens if you give an 18 month old some toilet roll from the cupboard and say "go and put this in the toilet".

ledge, Sunday, 17 January 2021 09:15 (three months ago) link

🤔

Madchen, Sunday, 17 January 2021 09:33 (three months ago) link

three months pass...

How are people handling vaccinated parents and unvaccinated kids?

𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Sunday, 2 May 2021 15:21 (one week ago) link

Do you mean our parents (their grandparents) or their parents (us)?

My wife and I are vaccinated and we live with unvaccinated children. We are extremely unlikely to infect them, and they are extremely unlikely to infect us.

Vaccinated grandparents can socialize with their unvaccinated grandchildren. They are extremely unlikely to infect one another, in any direction.

If there is any potential trouble it comes from cousins, I guess. Like, the under-16 crowd being allowed to cross-socialize because all the adults in their life are vaccinated. But they're effectively in a bubble with everyone in their respective schools, which could entail thousands of people.

Frumious Cumberbatch (Ye Mad Puffin), Sunday, 2 May 2021 17:41 (one week ago) link

Our unvaxxed six year old has seen all 6 of his double-vaxxed grandparents in the last two weeks inside and with no hesitation on our part. He’s not going to hangout with any other kids though unless we know they’ve been isolated for a while - so contact with his cousins who have been in school all year.

joygoat, Sunday, 2 May 2021 22:53 (one week ago) link

I place no restrictions on who my kids can see at this point. I have them wear masks inside when with other kids (or unvaxxed adults but that doesn't happen anymore). I have them mask outside depending on my perception of the comfort level of the other parents (which can be tough to gauge and tends to lead to erring on the side of masks) even though I find masks outside totally unnecessary.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Monday, 3 May 2021 02:07 (one week ago) link

I should also note that I wasn't that worried about my kids getting it based on how uncommon it is for children to have severe symptoms, but we were cautious anyway, and then one of them did get it (and probably both - the other tested negative but had identical symptoms), and as would be statistically expected it was extremely mild, like a cold that came and went in a couple days with no effects lingering more than a week.

When I say cautious I mean that we didn't take them into stores or restaurants and that all playdates were outside and masked, and we had zero indoor gatherings. We made one mistake which was that we rented an airbnb and then one day decided to try skiing at a small nearby mountain, never having done it and thinking "safe outdoor activity." What we didn't realize was that we'd be indoors getting rentals for an extended period of time with people not really observing distance or wearing masks properly, and that's where I think they picked it up.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Monday, 3 May 2021 02:20 (one week ago) link

I keep a close eye on the stats and adjust my caution accordingly. Last week there were 20 cases per 100,000 in our local authority area so I’m pretty comfortable taking our son to see his (double vaccinated) grandparents even if he’s mixing with plenty of others at school, playgrounds, Beavers and gymnastics club. I’d feel differently if the numbers were a lot higher, or if we were in a surge testing area for the Brazilian or South African variant.

Madchen, Monday, 3 May 2021 08:18 (one week ago) link

Likewise. Our rates are really low at the moment, 13 per 100,000 last week. We're still only meeting outside, either with (vaccinated) family or friends in similar situation to us, and haven't actually done it very much so far. I'm pretty relaxed in general about being outside in uncrowded places, generally moving around etc.
I got vaccinated last week and once it kicks in I'm going to the hairdressers for the first time in a year and booking the family in for dentist checkups.

kinder, Monday, 3 May 2021 09:42 (one week ago) link

My daughter and a friend spent some outside time together last week, generally staying masked. They came inside for dinner, but it seemed like a manageable risk level given that we're fully vaccinated and the kids were masked except while eating. It would have been better if we had eaten outside, but the weather didn't cooperate.

Frumious Cumberbatch (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 3 May 2021 14:03 (one week ago) link

my kids are going back to day care in a month and then to school a couple months later, so we've fully accepted that there's gonna be some risk and it's out of our hands. I have been trying to look at this rationally, it's easy to get very worked up about Covid since it's in the news all the time and literally ruined everyone's lives for over a year but I think the truth is that given how this affects (or rather, doesn't) kids I should probably be more worried about pneumonia or even just the regular old flu. it's kind of like how people get traumatized hearing about shootings constantly and when in public actively look for people with guns or "who here might go nuts" when the reality is their chances of getting into a fatal car wreck on the way home is probably higher. that said, I still don't want them around unvaccinated people. luckily the place I live got hit so hard in October and November that our infection rates are actually pretty low now.

frogbs, Monday, 3 May 2021 15:36 (one week ago) link

yup. And I know this is all anecdotal evidence, but in addition to my own, I now know a bunch of kids who have had it, all extremely mild except one high school student who had a moderate case but not like "should we go to the hospital?" bad. None of these kids have after-effects either.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Monday, 3 May 2021 15:59 (one week ago) link

A similar analogy might be how we tend to get anxious during plane takeoff/landing/turbulence when statistically we have more reason to be nervous on a highway.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Monday, 3 May 2021 16:00 (one week ago) link

sorry my question a while ago was unclear

How are people handling vaccinated parents and unvaccinated kids?

should have been: how are people handling their being vaccinated but their kids not.

i feel like things aren't really changing for us yet even though all adults (parents and grandparents are vaccinated).

parks etc. were already open and the one that's old enough for daycare has been back for a while. i have no desire to go to a restaurant with kids in these circumstances. and the kind of place we'd take our (very young) kids for activities (museums, etc.) don't seem like they're going to open soon in a way that is pleasant to attend.

and that's assuming we weren't worried about the risks to ourselves and others. which we are. the risks are lower than they were where we live, but the CDC is still requiring masks for unvaccinated kids in the same situations they're recommending them for unvaccinated adults for a reason.

so our getting vaccinated in the last week or two has been kind of an anticlimax.

𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Friday, 7 May 2021 19:55 (one week ago) link


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