Hello Mudduh Hello Fadduh: ILX Rolling Parenting Thread

Yes, I've been told that teething = overproduction of saliva = upset stomach = watery stools. Ava has certainly gone through bouts of this (the worst one was the onset of teething); she had bad nappy rash at the same time. The teething thing is ongoing (she still only has six teeth) but, apart from occasionally interrupted sleep, the symptoms are not nearly as bad as they were at the start.

Met an old college friend up on Merseyside this weekend and got to cuddle his 9-week-old daughter; I'd forgotten how tiny, light and fragile they are at that age. A timely reminder, I suppose.

Baby K is beautiful.

teething can cause nausea, and the runs that my kids got from teething were potent i.e. rash if you didn't change after every watery fart. Teeny, I'll bet your little guy is teething.

My little one (5 months last week, WTF!!!!!!!!!!) is getting rice cereal before bed every night now. She's probably teething. She's had a nasty cold, too. Misery for like three weeks. What is sex like, anyway? I can't remember.

I held a four-week old baby yesterday HE WAS TINY! (Born prematurely so he's only just reached the size of many newborns.) Awwwww.

cute, nathalie.

here's a few from easter weekend, one in his easter outfit and one not:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v335/gypsyfrocksbedlam/Zollereaster06.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v335/gypsyfrocksbedlam/ZollerApril06.jpg

On Monday, our boy of 18 months, took a dive off the changing table and landed on his mouth. Lots of blood, a busted tooth, a big scare, a day at the ER, and we're one tooth lighter! All parents seem to have a similar story, not that it makes it an easier to go through. He's feeling like nothing happened, running around and happy as ever; they're so resilient.

Indeed. Even Britney Spears. Then again, didn't he fall from a collapsing chair or something? Cracked skull was the result.

Anyhow, gotta go breastfeed Ophelia now. :-)

z0ller meets david blaine:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v335/gypsyfrocksbedlam/zollerblaine.jpg

(and is not terribly impressed)

Everyone in our family has the flu. S. doesn't want to go to sleep right now. Aargh.

Edith says sleep is for squares and we're going to be the hippest family in town.

developmental milestone reached this week: RASPBERRIES!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IIuIiC5ZLY

(sorry for the shitty quality)

Okay, call me dumb but what do you mean with raspberries? Also, your kid is totally CUTE. Though not as cute as mine of course. Just kidding! But yeah I am at this stage where I think that my kid is *the bestest*, cutest, prettiest thing on this planet.

So how about crying? I have been told I should leave her crying (without ferberizing) which TOTALLY FUCKING freaks me out. I know I should not spoil her, but I can't just leave her crying. :-( How do I find a middle road? I think ferberizing (sp?) is the way to go.

Ophelia still doesn't sleep through the night but then I do give her last bottle around 7 or 8 pm and she now sleeps until about 3 or, like this morning, 4 am. I don't really mind, but I know that sooner or later I'll need to *stretch* it.

http://static.flickr.com/51/141391974_33a30705f5.jpg?v=0

This is on her 100 days. My parents bought this Gap dress.

did i say bottle? hahaha, oh no! i still breastfeed. she doesn't even like my milk in a bottle. this is how hardcore she is. :-)

Nathalie: definition 4 at http://www.answers.com/raspberry&r=67

I'm afraid Ava raspberries a little too often - usually a third of the way through meal-time. Other developments: a seventh tooth and a terror of bubbles. We thought we'd be in for guaranteed roffles when we bought one of those bubble magic guns but, no - she screams and shakes with fear. I pick her up to console her and her eyes dart around, making sure they've all popped.

We Ferberize now (without knowing it was referred to as that) but certainly not at the age Ophelia is; we just couldn't leave her to cry at that age. Also, as I'm sure you know, there are different intensities of crying and some just aren't going to dissipate after 5 or 10 minutes. We were fortunate in that Ava was always a good sleeper so we weren't tested too often; if we'd had a colicky baby (and who knows with #2) perhaps we'd have been Ferberizing at every opportunity.

today our son is ten years old! the latter stretch of this thread has practically in tears realizing how fast the time has gone by(sometimes cliches are true, sorry)since the toddler days of sleep deficit, etc. of course parenting doesn't leave much time for nostalgia. yesterday was the party w/school friends, a big success and this morning I'm nursing a chocolate cake/pizza "hangover" and preparing for a grandparental invasion and b-day dinner tonight.

these nights I lay wake pondering my answers to recent queries:

have you ever seen an X-rated movie?

why did those people in Rent die?

what does getting drunk feel like?

when people get married, they do something where they take their clothes off and hurt each other. did you guys do this?

Aaah, it's bit like razzing then? Ophelia does this quite a bit. She's extremely vocal. In the morning she likes to shout - I do mean SHOUT - so much so that I wake up and have no option but to get dressed and go for a walk with her. ;-)

We've gone back to putting her on her belly. She's getting used to it again and lifts her head again. I'm very happy because this, together with propping her, expands her world. She's now getting the hang of throwing toys away. Yep, she's gonna be a feisty little girl.

the cry-it-out debate is probably one of the biggest ones in parenting I think. I think it's interesting to hear other parents' views and experiences with going-to-sleep issues but ultimately every kid, every parent, and every situation is different and there's no one solution that applies to everyone. You just have to know yourself and your baby and try to figure out what is going to result in happiness for all.

A lot of people will say you MUST let them cry themselves to sleep or they'll never learn how to go back to sleep in the middle of the night and they'll be cranky and never develop good sleep habits. A lot of people will say you must NEVER let them cry themselves to sleep because it pumps all these stress hormones into the brain and they lose trust in you.

I got quite stressed out about it for a while listening to both sides, they couldn't both be right! But you can't let other people make you feel guilty or whatever, it's you and your kid and your sleep and nobody else's. If you trust your instincts and feel secure in your decisions, you won't feel guilty.

We haven't had to cry-it-out and I'm not sure that we could. If my kid was waking up five times a night and cranky all day, then that might be the best way to go. Right now he goes to sleep pretty easily and wakes up once a night around 5 in the morning if he wakes up at all. A month ago it was twice a night; he's growing and figuring things out. And he's really happy during the day. Letting him cry it out in order to skip that 5 a.m. feeding is not a good tradeoff for me.

Now, things may be different when he's older and crying for different reasons, but at this age that's where I stand.

Oh uh, I was talking about day time crying but I guess that applies to this as well? She never really cries at night. Wakes up about 2, 3 or sometimes 4 am but never cries. Then again I always pick her up after she *nearly* starts crying. I don't know... I'm still in doubt. I certainly won't do it before she's 6 months old but after that? Then I'll definitely try ferberizing. I can understand both sides (letting her cry: showing who's in control versus not letting her cry:showing you are there for her?). That said, I will need to make a decision soon. Time definitely flies with babies. :-)

During the day she really does need a lot of attention: she needs someone around her. Leave her alone for a few minutes and she cries (or shouts). She immediately stops when I (or someone else) approaches her. I don't mind,but I know in the long run she'll need to learn how to be on her own. OF course now is too soon, she's only four months old but later? I don't know... Mostly I just go with the flow of things. So far I think she's adapted extremely well. I can even put her in bed and let her fall asleep on her own in the evening!

We've discovered: there's crying and then there's crying. S. sometimes does this very loud thing we refer to as "polite crying" as we put him in his crib: "no, really, it's been wonderful, I hate to see you go, I wish I could stay up and play with you ALL NIGHT." (Within a couple of minutes, he's generally passed out.) But if he sounds like he's actually distressed, then we pick him up and hold him.

Ongoing issue with S.: he DOES NOT LIKE the sippy cup at ALL. We've tried various models; he's just not into it, and it makes it difficult for him to get enough fluids, I fear.

He's still trying really hard to talk, but is having signifier/signified issues.

S. reminds us how old he is:

We saw S. and his mom from afar at the EMP last weekend - he is indeed adorable!

re: sippy cup: Z was never too big on it either. we didn't really push, just waited a few months until he could handle a cup with a straw, which he greatly prefers.

Dear ILXors with childrens, guess what I have seen recently on the playground near my home? I have seen children playing on the playground equipment with no bicycles in sight, and yet these children are wearing helmets! This is clearly wrong! Tell me you would never do this to your kids!

I'm making mine promise to wear a helmet 24/7 when she goes to college.

Two year old wears helmet under two conditions:
1. On pushbike
2. Whenever he can get his hands on it. Because he thinks it's so cool. Black w/ red flames. When he puts it on himself, it's usually backwards, tho.

Mrs. Hunter treats people with traumatic brain injury. She likes the helmets. All the same, kiddo does not wear a helmet at the playground.

But before he got his helmet:

http://static.flickr.com/35/106923596_98df653033.jpg

I really like that concept of "polite crying"!

We hit both sides of my husband's (divorced) family yesterday, it was like an oddysey of bad food. I'm surprised my husband didn't have scurvy and/or rickets, I've never seen these people eat a vegetable beyond iceberg lettuce. Anyway at least we have something to talk about now besides arguing about politics.

When do people stop accosting you in the supermarket to coo at your child? I never mind but it's a funny phenomenon.

The cooing that I find most amusing is that of toddlers. It seems that every 2 to 4 year old who I encounter must, must, must see and touch any baby less than 6 months old--and pronounce "OHH! BABY!!!" *poke finger in baby's eye*

yes totally!

oh while I'm thinking of it, let me totally spam the board with my diaper find: I found a good online discount diaper place: http://1800diapers.com/ Prices are equivalent or cheaper than anything I've found around here, and there's no sales tax (except in NJ I think) and cheap or free shipping. I just received my first order (2x174 Luvs) and got them quickly, they're just like diapers you get in the store (I thought maybe they'd be like for the Korean market or something, who knows). They sell diapers, formula, and wipes. The delivery-to-your-door factor is also a plus, god knows it's hard enough shopping with the kid(s) without dealing with enormous boxes of diapers. Use my discount code (LAAZ4830) and you'll get $2 off and I get a buck kicked back to me for my next order.

Ava says, "Bay-beee!" at any other human under the age of about 10. But also at dogs, bricks, windows, etc. The supermarket cooing hasn't stopped yet...

She was very insistently pointing at the 200ml mark on her bottle at lunchtime and saying, "Bo." We were in Bodeans, maybe that had something to do with it.

Sorry M, but people are NEVER going to stop cooing at Ava :)

I don't think the public cooing stops until the kid is old enough to shoot effective surly scowls.

loobylu has a new kids activity blog: http://kiddley.com/

i've been looking for a good story book. alas, i can't seem to find one. :-(

ophelia now loves being on her belly. her head control is GR34T! she also turns on her side.

http://static.flickr.com/48/144522666_51d5fc1e68.jpg?v=0

ooh ooh I forgot to mention Louis has now figured out how to get up on hands and knees and rock back and forth, it is super neat to see.

what a dear ophelia is, I can see a little of your face in hers there.

What kind of book are you looking for?

My First Mother Goose by Iona Opie is really nice.

My two-year-olds were really good today:) (Well, they were mine for about half an hour.)

Actually she looks a lot like my mom. She definitely has the same eyes. :-)

I can't wait till Ophelia gets up but I think I'll just die of shock. :-) I'm so accustomed to her being on her back (or belly). I can't picture her walking around.

What book? Just a collection of *classics*, I guess. But as I'm looking for a Dutch version - I don't want to teach her English just yet (hah!) - I can't look on Amazon.co.uk. BUMMAH. Maybe I should teach her some English? heh.

dikkie dik?

This seems like a Dutch book. No thanks. I have enough Dutch material: We bought this toy which has a recording of Dutch songs. My husband's convinced that some kids will turn into serial killers because of these ehstatickally chirpy songs. :-)

We have a Belgian book in Basque, by this person:

http://www.liesbetslegers.be/

I don't suppose this is very helpful.

Edith is developing tantrum tendencies.

Oh no, those look GREAT! I'll check it out.

Breastfeeding is getting difficult again: she only wants to eat for about five minutes at each breast and then STOPS and CRIES. :-(((( I'm of course terribly worried that she'll be underfed. Boo. Maybe I should just relax. Maybe she's eating enough or maybe she's teething?!? I was very early with my first tooth and it seems to be hereditary.

I bought a high chair yesterday because soon we might introduce solids. Scary. :-)

Last night - she turned exactly four months old yesterdat - she slept in her own room for the very first time. It went surprisingly will (for me and for her). :-)

Sometimes babies feed a lot, sometimes a little. If she doesn't want any more then just relax. In a couple of weeks she'll go through another growth spurt and be sucking that tit like no tomorrow.

Moved out this week into the basement studio flat at our friends' (vast) house while our place is being rewired. Ava's travel cot is in the hallway, which unfortunately means we have to walk past it to the bathroom and any activity in the kitchen wakes her up. I come home from work at 7:30 and have to creep in and talk in whispers. Gawd help us if a mobile phone rings.

It struck me that a hell of a lot of families (maybe a majority in London) live like this - without the luxury of a separate room for baby. How do they cope? Cos we're struggling, really - doesn't help that Ava's got her first bad cold in a couple of months, but she wakes up every couple of hours and so do we.

Still, she loves the swing, the dog, her bathtime buddy Luke and the grounds (it could hardly just be called a garden).

I just found out the newcoming baby will be another lady-baby and I am very happy about it. I don't know why, but I somehow feel safer like this, although I guess they will get together in hating their mum-figure (me) by the time they are 10...Anyway, Sara is super fine, and tall, and really getting big. wow, reading Nathalie's posts I suddenly remembered when we started feeding Sara with solid food. and, oh, was I paranoid, but then everything went fine. only, it really feels, phisically feels, like yesterday. time get to feel so "wide" when you have children, doesn't it?

congratulations! time definitely gets very weird. I've been picking up kid clothes from yard sales when I find them and it's so hard to believe my boy will ever be big enough to fit in them, that I'll ever be sending him off to school etc etc.

Whoo! Congrats!

We had the 13-wk on numero duo last week and all is well. Nuchal fold translucency results were good (Pam's 39 but the trisomy risk was down at 1:730) and all the bits appear to be there. We might discover the sex (never did with Ava) at the 20-wk scan in July. Foetus #2 is 69mm long!

Andrew, thanks for the encouraging words. I realize this,but always need to be told again and again as I worry way too much. :-) I just keep thinking about the midwives saying I HAD TO FEED TWENTY TO THIRTY MINUTES. Argh. Those midwives sure brainwashed me (and others).:-)

It struck me that a hell of a lot of families (maybe a majority in London) live like this - without the luxury of a separate room for baby. How do they cope? Cos we're struggling, really - doesn't help that Ava's got her first bad cold in a couple of months, but she wakes up every couple of hours and so do we.

The midwives told us that it's best to put the baby in a seperate room from three months old. At the time I was pregnant and I could never imagine doing it as such an early age. Now she's four months and I decided on my own to put her in her own room. In the evening I felt extremely guilty, but during the night, when O woke me up for a feeding, I felt as though it was mean to be. It's far easier actually as there's a bathroom in the next room. (Yes, we're spoiled rotten: Ophelia has her own private bathroom.)

ANYWAY, the midwives said that, if you don't have a babyroom, one should put the baby in the bathroom (or any other room that can be darkened and is quiet.)

It's great hearing about new babies - yay for the good test results. It's a flashback but, I still don't know, a flashforward: I'm still undecided whether to have a second child or not. How did you guys decide? I think it's just weird deciding over a new life in a way...

YES NATHALIE. My husband talks about numbers two and three all the time. I'm an only child and he's one of three boys, I enjoyed being an only and he enjoys having brothers. I'm pretty much on board with having more but the timing is what I wonder about. My doc says you want to give your body a full year to recover between pregnancies but I feel totally recovered now (not that I want to get preggo again now, just saying). I would really like to hear people's thoughts on baby-spacing, both from the perspective of a parent and a sibling.

I have one brother but he's almost 10 years older than me and we didn't have that close sibling thing; Pam (younger sister & brother - both within 4 years of her) tells so many wonderful stories of family road trips and getting each other into trouble (and there's always so much group hilarity in those old Polaroids) that we were determined that Ava should have that experience. Plus they can entertain each other to a certain extent when they're a bit older and give Ma and Pa some peace.

The negative aspect to Pam's experience was that three kids generally meant a lot of 2 on 1 meanness. So we're stopping at two (but it's more an age thing with us). The gap will be 21 months for us, which seems pretty good.

Pam's had to do a lot of looking after Luke and Ava this week and it's been a shock to the system; two toddlers is bloody hard work. We can only comfort ourselves in the knowledge that #2 won't be mobile until next summer, by which time Ava might be a little more controllable.

How long are you in limbo, Mike? Or is that a silly question? I think you might need some kind of holiday soon. Or is that a silly comment?