ILX Parenting 5: I'm a big kid now

My parents are being really amazing, though. My mom has already done all of the laundry, and my stepfather made breakfast AND did the dishes, shoveled the back steps, and took out the trash. And gave me $200 "for groceries."

LIL CEASE has started moving his head a lot, and will sort of have it held up before suddenly losing control and slamming it into my head or shoulder. He's also discovered that he can move his hands and cause them to hit things that dangle in front of him which is like the most mind-blowing thing. I guess when you're 7 weeks old everything is sort of mind blowing.

And kids reacting to kids is really interesting too - we have friends with a 5.5 year old and a 2.5 year old, and another on the way in June. The older one is fascinated by our baby, always asking "why does he look mad?" and "why can't he do anything?" and such. It's like he had no recollection of when his brother was born but knows there's going to be another baby around soon and is trying to figure out how they work.

yeah mine headbutts me quite a lot! also kicks his legs straight as if launching himself away from me. bound to end in injury sometime.

had the best day with him so far. which means i'm dreading tonight...

Oh yeah the headbutting. I fully expect to have my nose broken before Ivy turns two.

J head-butted my sister-in-law's partner directly in the mouth while playing over the Christmas break and I was lucky enough to get the whole thing on film. This will be saved for a graduation video.

Also the kicking. I've constantly got bruises around my midsection. And Jeff and I both usually have scratches on our face. For someone so adorable and cuddly and wonderful and generally good natured, our daughter can really rough us up.

D took a little chunk out of my nose the other day with his claws AFTER I'd trimmed his nails. Also both of them are getting very good at kicking me in the crotch.

Baby talons, man. They are unstoppable. I want to put little silicone caps on her nails like you can get for cats.

You gotta watch your eyes, I thought my left eye was perma-fucked for at least a week or two after she scratched it.

cutest lil killing machines

I've already had one cornea scratch that the eye doc said was probably due to a baby talon, since I couldn't think of any injury I had suffered and getting baby fingers in the eye is pretty much a daily occurrence.

cutting baby nails is bringing out the zen master in me

we usually wait until he's totally passed out to attempt that

Legitimate reason to put the telly on, imo.

I was picking her up from daycare last night. We were getting her boots on when she spots an insect. She loves insects. Growing Up Creepie – one of her favorite shows. She goes “daddy, let’s save that bug!” I look closer – it’s a small roach. I don’t want to make a fuss. I don’t think any of the daycare staff has noticed our interaction. I would kill the roach, but she wants to save it and she’s being so cute about it so I quietly grab a tissue and coax the roach onto it and rush her out the door, where we will set it free about 10 feet away in a bush.

But then everything goes wrong. The bug starts crawling toward me, right toward my hand! I freak out and drop the tissue. But when I look around on the sidewalk, the roach is nowhere to be seen on the ground. All that’s there is my daughter’s wide-open backpack. Trying to regain my calm, I zip the bag up tight and throw it in my car.

When I get home, I start methodically emptying the bag in the kitchen (dark and rainy out last night so there was really no other place to do this). Take out her spare change of clothes, examine, set them to the side. Take out her lunch box, examine, set it to the side. Her stuffed animal, her pull-ups, etc. All I’m left with is the empty backpack. I turn it upside-down over the middle of the kitchen floor, give it a light shake…and the roach falls out, bounces once, and then scurries away into a crack under the cabinets.

aw

meanwhile both of my kids got hit with the RSV hammer after one week of day care and are currently in the hospital under observation

That sucks. The beginning of daycare seems to be a big shock to the immune system for kids. I've already noticed a big drop in her being sick even since september though.

x-post - aw, Dan! that sounds stressful. hope they get better quick.

Oh Dan I'm sorry. I lived in abject fear of RSV when was younger, especially since she was preemie and our asshole insurance wouldn't cover the RSV vaccine.

I hope the boys are okay!

Feel better, little guys.

That sucks. The beginning of daycare seems to be a big shock to the immune system for kids.

Also parents. I've pretty much been sick since Ivy started daycare. Yay.

I live in fear of when my little guy starts getting colds etc. but I know it's gotta happen... And then me getting sick. And my bf getting sick (he is a giant wimp when it comes to illness. I just plow through.) There will be much handwashing but I know that doesn't matter much when daycare is in the picture. Ugh why must daycares be cesspools.

I hope your little guys are getting better, DJP!

Also, lol roach, so hard not to freak out.

Seriously. That was some heroic action on your part, how's life.

I keep telling myself that every time I get a cold, I develop immunities to another cold virus strain. At the rate I'm going, I should be immune to colds completely in five years.

I was always much more afraid of the stomach bugs than the colds -- a lot of dread about her throwing up/having diarrhea. But you know, it happens, you clean it up, things keep going.

how about a cold that leads to throwing up, giving you the best of both worlds

xxxp You could have zipped up the backpack overnight and sent it back to the daycare, roachie would probably have crawled back out the next day.

The cold that my family and I had last week led to throwing up. My daughter and I both gag when our throats get irritated I guess.

baby + 3-year-old is a whole new adventure

haha yeah, welcome to that club. unbelievable looking back.

idk where else to put this so I'm putting it here:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B7OF4Q_IcAEHqlH.jpg

lol

haha yeah, welcome to that club. unbelievable looking back.

this week has been good -- the 3-year-old, who's slept pretty poorly most of his life, has been having good nights! but wow wow wow...I thought I knew fatigue with kid #1. no. I did not even know the beginning of it.

K took 1.5 hours to fall asleep last night, with me lying on the mat next to her.

yes. 1 + 1 ≠ 2 ; 1 + 1 = 200. it's exponential. and I say this as Euler, the Mastur of Us All

toilet training has begun. Had our first no-accident day yesterday (unless you count Ella standing up mid-pee to see what the admittedly unusually loud sloshing noise in the potty was).

A monster?

Heh. I don't see how that could backfire at all.

http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/my-2-month-old-son-wont-stop-demanding-soda-grown--1721?utm_campaign=default&utm_medium=ShareTools&utm_source=twitter

crying with laughter at this

very helpful considering our kids are STILL in the hospital

they're doing much better, but still

Definitely LOLing at my desk here. jesus...

When do they think the boys can go home?

no idea, depends on when they can go a while without spiking fevers and when they start eating regularly again

I was hoping for tomorrow but I think Monday is more likely

Objectively that's not too long, I guess, but it feels like freaking forever. I hope you and Ms. P are getting rest, too.

well, we are sleeping on uncomfortable fold-out chairs in the hospital rather than in our bed 10 minutes away, so not really

last night I got more than 7 hours of sleep for the first time in 2015 largely because we left the hospital to eat and I had two beers at dinner

*jealous*

(about the 7 hours of sleep)

i can't count that high in hours of sleep.

7 hours of sleep because you're in the hospital and someone is sucking mucus out of your kids' lungs isn't primo sleep

Those fold out chairs are hideous torture devices, too. I wish I lived in Boston so I could bring you a casserole.