ILX Parenting 5: I'm a big kid now

Yeah, apparently she has it. I mean I've known for a while, but then some friend of my mother-in-law (it's always some friend of the mother-in-law) made it sound like it was some serious thing that she'll have to deal with for the rest of her life, and was probably exaggerating or confusing two different things.

I'm pretty sure I have/had it too -- I read descriptions and it sounds exactly like me. Difficulty running laps or doing pullups/situps/pushups at a young age, difficulty with handwriting and normal pencil grip, easier fatigue, etc. It sucked as a boy growing up, obviously, and I never really thought of it as some potentially genetic thing until now. I just thought "oh my parents didn't like sports, so I probably didn't spend as much time playing sports as other kids." But the thing is I spent a good amount of time playing sports, I was on teams, I played at recess every day, etc., and I did seem to be naturally bad at them, like other kids just mastered stuff way more easily than I did. It's simultaneously reassuring and frustrating to think of it as something that might have been beyond my control. At the same time, I can do quite a lot of pushups etc. now and am relatively physically strong, although it took work.

Anyway, I think it is still worse for boys than girls to have this, although it shouldn't be, and ultimately it may just mean I don't have a future varsity athlete, which is fine.

From my extensive (not extensive at all) internet research, it's something that has less of an impact if it's caught early, and that sounds like the case with K.

I definitely see that she is behind other kids physically. She walked after 18 months, she generally does not seem to like climbing or doing anything on the playground other than going through the sprinkler or going in the swing. She gets free physical therapy from the city once a week.

Boring things our baby likes watching on TV, a list: snooker, weather forecasts.

I've officially had to stop watching TV while breast feeding because Ivy will stop eating and turn and watch TV instead. Sigh.

Get 'em addicted now, and you've got something to withhold for misbehaviour in a couple of years' time, that's what I say. (I don't. But it has crossed my mind.)

I definitely use TV as a tool. If it weren't for the hypnotic power of Sesame Street I'd never be able to trim her Freddie Kruger talons.

We watched the French Open the other day.

tv works well for haircuts too ime

Ha D & J were ENTRANCED by the French Open, to the point where I am seriously considering repainting their room to clay-court red.

when michael never learns to read, remind me to tell him that i tried, but he turned into such a shit at bedtime around 8 months that i gave up.

in fact, i'm just going to use that for all things. "Son, the reason you are terrible at baseball is that i rolled a ball to you when you were 4 months old, and you put it in your mouth instead of rolling it back. I just didn't see the point in continuing."

Beeps got three awards at her first grade recognition ceremony. One was for being and accelerated reader and showed her AR score. Not knowing what the crap that score meant I went to the monster web and found out she is reading at a 6th level. Holy crap!!!!!

go beeps!!

Whoa! Way to go, kiddo!

aw Beeps. that's awesome!

Nice!

that rules

superstar reader! give her some kafka now, just to see how she does

fyi beeps yr getting the complete works of James Joyce for your birthday

We got a couple of parking tickets within a week recently and now Evie is a total backseat driver/parker. "Daddy, what does that sign say? Can we park here? Are we going to get a ticket? Is it ok to park here?" And yesterday we watched most of The Great Muppet Caper until Evie made me turn it off because it's "too scary" and now she's asked me four or five times why Miss Piggy was put in jail (the bad guys frame her to make it look like she is the diamond thief, which I guess is kind of a complicated concept). She did NOT like Miss Piggy being put in jail.

i lolled at this:

http://24.media.tumblr.com/60374321e56f42ecd4dbcb48cb202cff/tumblr_n780h1r9OK1qb3s9go1_400.jpg

My favorite current mispronunciation is "Lesterday". She's pretty sure of it too: "Do you mean yesterday? Yuh, yuh yesterday?" "No, lesterday!"

K insists on calling the elevator the aligator

Another frozen reference that randomly pops up now: "The Love Experts"

lol @ aligator.

my son is started saying "GHEE" as please. it is so cute when he rly wants something and hes like GHEE GHEE GHEEEEEEEEEEEE and im like homie we're vegan we dont even eat dairy.

lol

We used to go to a pool that required taking an elevator, and they called it (or at least we thought they called it) the "alligator pool." Maybe they were saying "elevator..."

Uh, D is showing strong signs of teething. This seems super unfun.

Good grief, they are going to be walking by the time they are five months old.

We had a terrible couple of days of teething hell around 10 weeks, and nothing to speak of since thank goodness.

teething has always been pretty rough for us, thankfully there is only one set of teeth left to come in for J

Ibuprofen is your friend.

Definitely

oh yea. J knows it too, he loves that shit

Had some parenting weirdness last night. Not really sure how to handle it. My wife bought some summer dresses yesterday. It's pretty out of the ordinary for her. She's been a life-long tomboy to certain extent and as a grown-up and parent has totally just worn what feels comfortable to her: scrubs, sweats, board-shorts, whatever. A few weeks ago she mentioned to me that she was thinking about wearing some sundresses this summer. Our daughter likes wearing dresses sometimes and I think she wanted to bond a little that way.

Anyway, so yesterday she came across a huge stack of sundresses for cheap and bought a few. I was washing them and found that they were "no tumble dry" so I began hanging them around the house.

When he saw them, my 10-year-old got so upset that he shut himself in his room sobbing. He really didn't want to talk about it except that he felt that his "mommy from two weeks ago would never have worn a dress". He cries sometimes when he's sad about stuff, but not inordinately for a ten year old. I cried a lot more than him when I was his age. But he spent as much time crying about this as I have when say, a pet died.

And this isn't the first time he's gotten traumatically upset about his mother changing her appearance either. Last year she had her long tresses trimmed into a pixie cut and he apparently had a meltdown on the ride back from hair cuttery. She has definitely had short hair before during his life though.

We don't really know how to approach this. We've both tried talking with him about how people get to choose how they want to appear and that she's the same mommy inside and that wearing a dress every so often won't change her tomboyish nature. But we don't really feel like anything was resolved last night.

So anyone have any experience with anything like this?

my kids get weird when we get new glasses and new shoes; I can TOTALLY get why yr kid's upset about this! but I don't think you need to do anything to resolve this except let your kid see that your wife is still mommy no matter what she looks like. sounds like a good lesson actually.

This is the same guy who's switching to plain t-shirts, right? I wonder if his anxiety about appearance in general is playing into this some, or he is feeling particularly insecure (about himself and his outward presentation) and his mom's style change has him feeling particularly unmoored.

Yeah, the same guy carl. And I think those are both pretty good points.

Ivy has opinions! She has these really cool art cards (http://weegallery.com/store/woodland-collection-art-cards-for-baby.html - they were a gift but I have never been able to figure out who gave them to her so if it is you, lmk because I owe you a very heartfelt thank you note. I love these things) hanging up over the changing table. She used to just look at them but now she grabs them and HOLDS ON and tries to eat them and last night and this morning when we tried to take the card out of her hand so we could take her off the changing table she YELLED LIKE A BANSHEE because she really wanted to stay put and eat that card.

This are about to get reeeeeeeaaaaaal interesting...

Fox now starts crying when I stop singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. So I have to keep going because I can't bear the sadface.

My sons have discovered how awesome it is to shove their hands into their mouths. For some reason, my wife finds this upsetting.

Wait until they discovery the joy of putting their hands in their mouths and then taking that same slobber coated hand and shoving it in her mouth.

OTM.

I am pretty sure this is why she finds it upsetting

Awww Madchen. August hated coming to the end of books, so I had to kept reading or she'd cry. Doesn't last long.

how's life: I hated change as a child and struggle with it from time to time as an adult. I am also extremely sentimental. I was a child deeply attached to my world and very much in love with it. I was aware, at avery young age, that things could change and would and the thought of that alone drove me to tears and really, really hurt. I liked things just as they were.

I do remember crying when my mother tried to over correct her accent and pronounced things differently. Just made me cry because she wasn't sounding like the mom I knew, therefore not being the person who is mom. I was four or five. When my grandparents made changes to their home, they converted the carport to a den, I totally lost it when I saw them preparing for the construction I refused to visit for awhile. When I finally did return I cried all night. I was eight or so. When they had to cut down trees on their property or added a shed or took down a chicken coop...tears.

Crying it out helped me, having my grandmother reassure me that the change was good and pointed out how I would benefit from it helped.

Michael has gone from half-hearted commando crawl for 2 steps and roll over into all time speed demon "holy fuck where did the kid just go" belly up crawling in the last week. its ridiculous. also slightly terrifying because all baby-proofing projects need to get done uh right now.

baby proofing in my house mainly comprised moving the liquor bottles out of reach