Footballers you hate

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Maybe there's a reason, maybe there's not, but you know in your heart of hearts they're a cunt.

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babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:06 (nine months ago) link

Jordan Pickford. He just seems like a real Englandy clean-cut good boy England cunt.

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:08 (nine months ago) link

Your Jonjo Shelveys kind of go without saying but what a cunt.

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:09 (nine months ago) link

Lol technically blasphemy

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:12 (nine months ago) link

dele ali. so snide.

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:13 (nine months ago) link

gareth bale and his 'heart' celebration.

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:14 (nine months ago) link

On a personal note I used to harbour an unseemly amount of hate for Karl fucking Henry, a man who never cashed an honest paycheck in his life.

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:14 (nine months ago) link

let it be known that I said Ali was a cunt long ago, but the Spurs massive circled the wagons

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:15 (nine months ago) link

Hating Dangerous Dave Edwards would be like hating a puppy but how my heart sank every time he put a skill-less shift in for Big Mick.

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:16 (nine months ago) link

Let it be known that I said Ali was a cunt long ago, but the Spurs massive circled the wagons

Yes, he's hideous.

Load up your rubber wallets (Tom D.), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:17 (nine months ago) link

but find dele alli v punchable

― pandemic, Wednesday, January 4, 2017 8:26 PM (three years ago) bookmarkflaglink

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:17 (nine months ago) link

but find dele alli v punchable

― pandemic, Wednesday, January 4, 2017 8:26 PM (three years ago) bookmarkflaglink

― oscar bravo, Friday, February 21, 2020 4:17 PM (three seconds ago) bookmarkflaglink

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:18 (nine months ago) link

10 secs later he scored vs chelsea

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:18 (nine months ago) link

Hoo boy... Thread's only for English players, ppl who are still "playing"?

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:18 (nine months ago) link

shouldn't think so

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:19 (nine months ago) link

I should've started this thread with a big pic of Terry but too obvious maybe

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:19 (nine months ago) link

No LBI this is an ecumenical theatre of hatred

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:20 (nine months ago) link

Azpilcueta and Andy Robertson

both snide, mouthy wee cunts in the classic FB mode

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:20 (nine months ago) link

lets save some time here

golden era darraghmac vendettas

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:22 (nine months ago) link

yeah that sweet spot where it's not just players whose antics you hate but would reluctantly tolerate if they were at your club but who you would genuinely hate to root for if they played for your team.

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:22 (nine months ago) link

xp thankig u

Could name a whole XI of Portuguese but: fucking Pepe.

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:22 (nine months ago) link

end of the season should really rerun that poll with aurier as an option. Landslide surely. still think of that robinson post when he pops up on SSN.
xp

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:23 (nine months ago) link

leaving actual performances aside, i have a particular hatred for players that perform the professional acts of dark arts required to thrive in the game, but who seem to get away with it because it's what's expected of them

yr savages, terrys, carvalhos, yes yr lamelas (love him tho)

obv it's the refs i should hate but look hatred isn't a rational thing

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:24 (nine months ago) link

Michael Owen

since day 1

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:25 (nine months ago) link

Fucking Sergio Ramos is one of the most booked defenders in history (citation needed) but I still feel like he gets away with murder every time.

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:25 (nine months ago) link

Always hated smug fucking Shearer.

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:26 (nine months ago) link

McGeady

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:26 (nine months ago) link

like

tbh

and this is inexcusable

but i actually think i hate the doubleglazed thickness of robbie keane

and i cant stand over that in any way, but i feel it's kind of in the spirit of the thread

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:26 (nine months ago) link

ooh i fucking hate the bones of that loveable irish scamp stephen hunt

and while theres much to defend in james mccleans stance, as a person and a player hes everything i hate in a footballer

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:28 (nine months ago) link

Nah I feel you with Keane, when we were huffing and puffing away in the Champo, pre Fosun, there were still sad old twats on the Express & Star whining that we should bring back the ungrateful immobile lump

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:30 (nine months ago) link

Already preparing to fp anyone who says Roy Keane

Robbie K ruined an exam for me once when he scored but it wasn’t an important one and none of us minded

hyds (gyac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:30 (nine months ago) link

I think my first true hate might have been Bryan Robson, the epitome of a gormless England shitkicker

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:32 (nine months ago) link

John Terry

Saxophone Of Futility (Michael B), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:36 (nine months ago) link

Michael Owen is a hate that goes back decades now. I should get a gold watch or something. Its probably 23 years since I first said what a fucking cunt.

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:38 (nine months ago) link

first hate was norman whiteside. rudi voller hate ran p deep, never has phlegm in a perm been so celebrated as it was in my house during that holland - germany game

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 15:39 (nine months ago) link

It's impressive how Owen is whiny and droney at the same time, and his career as resident thick cunt who hates the Wolves on BT is some next level of despicableness

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:40 (nine months ago) link

sol campbell
martin keown
lee dixon
ashley young

ymo sumac (NickB), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:41 (nine months ago) link

feel like pepe and ramos kind of at least get what they have coming tbh

oooh oooh oooh

neymar

neymar is the personification of everything shit about talented footballers

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:42 (nine months ago) link

a joyless preening ridiculous greedy fuck of a fuck

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:42 (nine months ago) link

I developed a faint tinge of protectiveness toward Neymar because of all the blokes who hate football using him as their exemplar of why football is shit but I guess when you come right down to it it's Neymar's fault, the cunt

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:45 (nine months ago) link

my feelings towards him are notably and similarly against the grain in that regard, but he is the one that you simply have to allow the knuckleheads to be right about.

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 15:55 (nine months ago) link

Michael Owen is a hate that goes back decades now. I should get a gold watch or something. Its probably 23 years since I first said what a fucking cunt.


You should hear me abusing him every time the boring prick is doing commentary!

hyds (gyac), Friday, 21 February 2020 16:09 (nine months ago) link

Some footballer hates are quite ephemeral, it sort of makes me lol I used get very irate about Dean Windass because he was a bit of a pantomime cunt in a mere a couple of west yorkshire derby games. Then later you realise the poor bastard barely has enough brain function to write his name and some of his interactions on social media are fucking hilarious. But my hatred for Owen is eternal and he is completely humourless as well as whiny, overrated and all the rest. That clip of him being a complete shrill cunt to a 14 year old goalkeeper he's tried to humiliate and Neville Southall says something sarcastic like: well played, he's a 14 year old kid. That time after Real Madrid he put out a prospectus of himself. Seriously I'd love to batter the little tory cunt to death with a lump hammer and force-feed his remains to all the lousy Talk Sport/5 live cunts/pub bore pundits in Ingerland shirts that used to blow so much smoke up his worthless arse.

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 16:13 (nine months ago) link

Joe Hart
Antoine Griezmann

ymo sumac (NickB), Friday, 21 February 2020 16:14 (nine months ago) link

oddly enough i've just found out they were both brand ambassadors for head & shoulders, so maybe i just don't like their shampoo

ymo sumac (NickB), Friday, 21 February 2020 16:16 (nine months ago) link

yes joe hart's decline has pleased me enormously. from 2nd best goalkeeper in the world behind manuel neuer according to p much every english pundit to not good enough to start for west ham or burnley in 3 seasons.

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 16:18 (nine months ago) link

actually i'm not sure if he's declined so much as found his level. will always have a fond regard for his role in england's defeat to iceland however.

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 16:20 (nine months ago) link

too obvious to say those cokehead thugs types like chris morgan, craig bellamy, etc?

first game i saw hamza choudhury play he pulled a fuckin shocking two footer on someone and he went right into my cunts book

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 16:20 (nine months ago) link

another vote for Beckham being Good and Alan Green spitting vitriol at him being a founding stone of Brexit or something

imago, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:29 (nine months ago) link

becks tick

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:30 (nine months ago) link

scholes can fuck off tho

oscar bravo, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:31 (nine months ago) link

/der/ Lothar Mattheus, from just before the wall fell, fanned on by a Germans hating grandad


Did you enjoy his crushed face when Bayern lost in the CL final as much as I did?

You are all wrong, Beckham is a cunt.

hyds (gyac), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:31 (nine months ago) link

Scrolling through peacocks twitter is the nuts, hard swerves between vile right wing batshittery and earnest discussions on whether or not Alan shearer was the best striker Newcastle ever had

ymo sumac (NickB), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:31 (nine months ago) link

Lol the nuts

ymo sumac (NickB), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:32 (nine months ago) link

lol I took it as read

imago, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:33 (nine months ago) link

I mean you can't remember prime Beckham very well if you think he was only about the odd free-kick

fair enough if you don't like him but I always thought he was pretty harmless off the pitch too

Number None, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:34 (nine months ago) link

Beckham visited Afghanistan in May 2010 for a morale-boosting visit to British troops fighting the Taliban insurgency. The appearance of Beckham as well as British Foreign Secretary William Hague and Defence Secretary Liam Fox was believed to have prompted a Taliban attack on Kandahar airfield.

hyds (gyac), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:39 (nine months ago) link

Taliban assault team led by Gavin Peacock

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:41 (nine months ago) link

Could name a whole XI of Portuguese

Deco, greetin'-faced wee cunt.

And Trezeguet another greetin'-faced crybaby cunt.

Load up your rubber wallets (Tom D.), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:50 (nine months ago) link

The #SuperBowlLIV half time show proves that Western culture is not simply secular it is raw paganism.

#TheNuts

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:55 (nine months ago) link

sorry for c+ping the official taliban gavin peacock twitter account

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 18:58 (nine months ago) link

Non-footballer who I hate because of his crying baby face: Andre Agassi

babby bitter (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 18:58 (nine months ago) link

he also brought shame to the bald community.

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 19:02 (nine months ago) link

_/der/ Lothar Mattheus, from just before the wall fell, fanned on by a Germans hating grandad_


Did you enjoy his crushed face when Bayern lost in the CL final as much as I did?

You are all wrong, Beckham is a cunt.


Yes! But not as much as Ronald Koeman literally wiping his arse with Lothar’s shirt after beating Germany in the ‘88 semis!

Also, Becks is a cunt, but I couldn’t hate him as a player.

Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 21 February 2020 19:45 (nine months ago) link

i hate that he moved to mls at, what, 32 years old?

frederik b. godt (jim in vancouver), Friday, 21 February 2020 19:53 (nine months ago) link

he also didn't do that well at real

was cracking for united right enough

frederik b. godt (jim in vancouver), Friday, 21 February 2020 19:54 (nine months ago) link

parable of the talents and all that

frederik b. godt (jim in vancouver), Friday, 21 February 2020 20:01 (nine months ago) link

I swear Gavin Peacock announced he was going to become a priest before he'd actually decided what religion to be born again in

Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:01 (nine months ago) link

Taliban turned him down maybe

Dunty Reggae party 🎉 (Noodle Vague), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:04 (nine months ago) link

Patrick Bamford 👇

Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:07 (nine months ago) link

his family was the shipping company with no fucking ships that Grayling awarded huuuge contract to!

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 21:20 (nine months ago) link

Back in the day, it would have been pretty much the whole of the classic Arsenal back four: Keown top of the shitlist and Nigel Winterburn close behind. Ben Thatcher was always a horrible cunt, too.

Ngolo Cantwell (Chinaski), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:29 (nine months ago) link

Keown looks like a Hitchcockesque character who has committed murder, got away with it and is just winging it for now to see if he can get away with it, pure hateful, murderous oblivion in those eyes but always smarmy and charming for the cameras. Looks like a pure Tory cunt as well.

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 21:38 (nine months ago) link

Gascoigne. The mawkish sentimentality. The tortured genius crap. Joining Rangers. The flute playing - which he did more than once. That elbows out sticking his hands in people's faces running style he got away with for years. Fuck him.

Load up your rubber wallets (Tom D.), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:52 (nine months ago) link

100%

waster cunt delighted to have gotten away with as much as he did while he could just be a cunt, and a big sadheaded cunt now no cunt cares the desperate cunt

a poster boy for every englishman who runs around fucking shit up without malice but with extreme fecklessness

BSC Joan Baez (darraghmac), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:57 (nine months ago) link

Aye. Total arsehole. The massive injury that he got trying to do gary charles illustrates the measure of the man.

Remaining in Tyneside: Shearer. Classic number 9, also an artless brute

frederik b. godt (jim in vancouver), Friday, 21 February 2020 21:58 (nine months ago) link

Shearer is allegedly a boorish bullying cunt off the field iirc

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 22:00 (nine months ago) link

Never liked Gascoigne or Shearer, and generally despise geordies tbh. Try taking a young autistic boy to Flamingoland and see how much your patience with wahay the fucking lads endures!

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 22:03 (nine months ago) link

I'd love to think of Keown as capable of something as classy as a Hitchcockian murder, but I think he's more your glass some poor unsuspecting bastard down the boozer and piss on them as they writhe on the floor kinda guy.

Shearer is a nasty bastard, but you'd have to pick him, wouldn't you? He makes me think of David Warner in that regard.

Ngolo Cantwell (Chinaski), Friday, 21 February 2020 22:06 (nine months ago) link

Not that one (he's too handsome).

Ngolo Cantwell (Chinaski), Friday, 21 February 2020 22:17 (nine months ago) link

some cunt took his head off once!

calzino, Friday, 21 February 2020 22:27 (nine months ago) link

ffs people, Gerrard.

Load up your rubber wallets (Tom D.), Saturday, 22 February 2020 09:45 (nine months ago) link

Phil Collins is good again

calzino, Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:05 (nine months ago) link

Pat Nevin really pisses me off on the world football show + 5live. I can remember back in the 90's the NME ran a really borderline racist piece on him saying Hey look this is a footballer who likes "real music" i.e. Joy Division etc.. not like these other mutts in football who listen to George Benson, Motown, R+B etc...

calzino, Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:10 (nine months ago) link

Ander Herrera

in twelve parts (lamonti), Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:30 (nine months ago) link

Phil Neville, a genuine fucking moron and creep

in twelve parts (lamonti), Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:33 (nine months ago) link

all those Nevilles can fuck off including Neville Neville!

calzino, Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:35 (nine months ago) link

didn't mind him as a player but oh god McManaman as a co-commentator

thomasintrouble, Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:35 (nine months ago) link

oh Neville Neville is dead... but he can still fuck off!

calzino, Saturday, 22 February 2020 10:38 (nine months ago) link

Jamie Vardy

ymo sumac (NickB), Saturday, 22 February 2020 12:37 (nine months ago) link

Sammy lee
Barry venison
Graeme sounness

ymo sumac (NickB), Saturday, 22 February 2020 12:55 (nine months ago) link

The Negative Tintin himself, Kevin de Bruyne

empire of the shunned (Matt #2), Saturday, 22 February 2020 12:57 (nine months ago) link

Can't deny Messi's skill but he's still a cunt, love to see him fail every time Argentina get to a major tournament

empire of the shunned (Matt #2), Saturday, 22 February 2020 12:59 (nine months ago) link

thomas müller is insufferable

groovemaaan, Saturday, 22 February 2020 13:05 (nine months ago) link

I could spam the fuck out of this thread with my mental rolodex of died in the wool STAUNCH at birth savage brutal Huns but that's too easy and they're all essentially products of their environment just like I am.
Instead I'm going to pick on a clown who bought into that We Are The People bollocks. Nacho fucking Novo. If there's a snidier wee waste of fucking cells I'd hate to see it.

Non, je ned raggette rien (onimo), Sunday, 23 February 2020 10:00 (nine months ago) link

seven months pass...

Van Dijk thing is kinda grim and interesting lulz but I can't believe how much Pickford has upped his cunt quotient this season

Notes on "Scamp" (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 18 October 2020 17:47 (one month ago) link


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