Sunderland 'Til I Cry: EFL and beyond 19/20

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Who was ready last weekend? I mean, Fulham weren't

imago, Tuesday, 6 August 2019 09:44 (one year ago) link

West Brom looked pretty slick vs Forest. Huddersfield were unfortunate last night.

Obviously looking forward to the Cocu / Rooney coaching team Derby are aiming to line up before the window ends.

ShariVari, Tuesday, 6 August 2019 10:03 (one year ago) link

lol all three relegated prem teams lost right?

do unfortunately think sunderland will smash l1 this year

nxd, Tuesday, 6 August 2019 10:57 (one year ago) link

I'm ready... it's our fuckwitted backpassing to rookie goalkeeper, english cb that isn't! But despite a mixed performance and still looking toothless/clueless in the last 3rd. Diakhaby's lightning pace and Grant's cool as a cucumber, totally confident penalty strike tells me mid table is doable!

calzino, Wednesday, 7 August 2019 15:04 (one year ago) link

Bradford Park Avenue sack their new management team (appointed in May) after two consecutive 5-0 losses.

Is the first week a new record?

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Thursday, 8 August 2019 09:53 (one year ago) link

There was famously a same day sacking years back but I can't remember who

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 8 August 2019 09:56 (one year ago) link

Rosenior, brilliant

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 8 August 2019 09:59 (one year ago) link

Norwich's climb from the nadir was triggered by the insta-sacking of Gunn after a 7-1 opening day defeat to Colchester

imago, Thursday, 8 August 2019 10:26 (one year ago) link

Robins had a nervous breakdown and walked after an opening day 4-0 home drubbing against Bournemouth. The chairman said he was a brilliant technical manager who lacked people skills and cited his refusal to high 5 the jovial Jermaine Beckford on the training ground as an example of this.

calzino, Thursday, 8 August 2019 10:35 (one year ago) link

You can probably trace a fairly steady decline for Colchester since that 7-1 too.

Tim, Thursday, 8 August 2019 12:46 (one year ago) link

Beating someone 7-1 and having them immediately nick your manager will generally have a depressive effect, as will having your stadium miles out of town in a weird car park

imago, Thursday, 8 August 2019 12:50 (one year ago) link

Our pre-season optimism lasted around 35 minutes into a display of deep ineptitude against a rubbishy Macclesfield; by halfway through the second half my drunk mates were reduced to complaining that the yoof are not as good at singing songs as we all were in the old days (NB not true at all in my estimation but wevs) then we spawned an 87th minute winner and joy was very nearly unconfined.

Tim, Thursday, 8 August 2019 12:51 (one year ago) link

Ah yes, Macclesfield - dear old Sol is ready

imago, Thursday, 8 August 2019 12:53 (one year ago) link

Won't (strike thru) Will always be fooled by an unbeaten preseason, and then feel all optimism drain away in first 20 mins of match 1.

calzino, Thursday, 8 August 2019 13:02 (one year ago) link

Yeah. After the first game is much too early to be giving it the "gotta grind out points in this league" gubbins also.

Tim, Thursday, 8 August 2019 13:06 (one year ago) link

Just passing Elland Rd ont bus and have a gigantic bamford head peering right at me at the traffic lights :x

calzino, Thursday, 8 August 2019 13:20 (one year ago) link

Some lovely old buildings in Holbeck tbf

calzino, Thursday, 8 August 2019 13:24 (one year ago) link

"Most of my constituency know I am not a football expert but it's my job to take up concerns when they are expressed to me and I have had a confidential briefing.

"I want to be satisfied that the sale was done by the book. The fans deserve to know that the sale of their football club has been done by the rules. I am not making a judgment."

The Examiner understands Mr Sheerman has not been in touch with Huddersfield Town directly to discuss his concerns.

A Huddersfield Town spokesman said: "The sale of the club has been ratified by the FA and the EFL as is part of the process."

lol the legitimate concerns of barry sheerman. just for some clarity our club used to be fully owned by a full on scumbag capitalist who utilised zero hour contracts and outsourcing to ruthlessly destroy his business rivals on the depleted high streets of the UK. And now the club is 3/4 owned by some amoral ambulance chaser who looks like a class a cunt as well. barry sheerman is the first mp to declare himself a professional lobbyist and now admits he doesn't know the difference between the Hudds and S Weds shirts after humiliating himself in a pub a couple of years back.

calzino, Thursday, 8 August 2019 22:23 (one year ago) link

Did somebody say...'surprise package'?

imago, Saturday, 10 August 2019 15:57 (one year ago) link

you've totally cursed it now.

calzino, Saturday, 10 August 2019 16:11 (one year ago) link

"We'll go for it," he told BBC Radio Suffolk. "Too many people come here and don't try to play but we'll go for it. We're playing rock and roll football."

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 August 2019 18:49 (one year ago) link

presumably if other people like it, that's a bonus

seven against feebs (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 August 2019 18:50 (one year ago) link

Richards gone. Would have been nicer to have done it during the close season but we said that last year too.

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Monday, 12 August 2019 12:10 (one year ago) link

Siewart gone.. never thought this golden era of 1 win in 8 months or whatever the fuck it was would ever come to an end!

calzino, Friday, 16 August 2019 21:49 (one year ago) link

You get beat again? 2-1 down last time I looked

PMS change (Noodle Vague), Friday, 16 August 2019 22:15 (one year ago) link

yeah finished 2-1, fucking Cavelerio finished us off! lots of talk of the players despising the manager, our chairman was on the verge of sacking him after the league cup defeat the other night. Always had a feeling it would be all downhill after Wagner went. Or at least normalis negotium as pom would say!

calzino, Friday, 16 August 2019 22:32 (one year ago) link

just for Bacuna's dopey assist for the Mitrovic opener - I seriously never want to see that cunt play for us again, and him looking like a L2 player and giving the ball away umpteen times a minute. While we were in the prem our recruitment was fucking shocking.

calzino, Friday, 16 August 2019 22:44 (one year ago) link

there are reports he was sacked on wednesday, but the chairman told him: seeing as he'd already picked his team for tonight he might as well stick about for another game before getting pumped.

calzino, Friday, 16 August 2019 22:54 (one year ago) link

Pușcaș looks like an excellent signing for Reading.

ShariVari, Sunday, 18 August 2019 12:41 (one year ago) link

As I say that he misses a one on one under no pressure whatsoever.

ShariVari, Sunday, 18 August 2019 12:42 (one year ago) link

damn, you can get a shit hot Romanian international striker for €8m these days. I wish our shitty scouting dept knew this last season.

calzino, Sunday, 18 August 2019 15:25 (one year ago) link


calzino, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 09:43 (one year ago) link


imago, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 09:48 (one year ago) link

Looks like dear old Oldham are in a spot of bother, largely flying under the radar AFAICT amid the massive pits of bother that Bury and Bolton find themselves in.

Luckily for the Latics they're playing us this evening and there's nothing we like to do more than donate three dumb points to crisis clubs.

Tim, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 09:55 (one year ago) link

I still can't get past my tribal hatred for Oldham whose fans were very shitty when we were the crisis club and our ex-player Wijnard tormented our dysfunctional defence. Also fuck them for the time they gave a contract to vehicular homicide scumbag Lee Hughes. Hope they go bust!

calzino, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 10:19 (one year ago) link

I've nothing against Oldham but I'd just as soon see them slide ignominiously out of the league as see them go bust in a blaze of Bury-style publicity. (They would be the first team that had been in the Premier League to do so I think?)

Tim, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 12:02 (one year ago) link

I haven't checked but I bet not many clubs have spent as many consecutive seasons in League 1 as Oldham have in the modern era, and if hadn't have been for that meddling amateur Scholesy ....

calzino, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 13:52 (one year ago) link

What is this new Bolton bullshit

Aston "Family Court" Barrett (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 20 August 2019 18:07 (one year ago) link

they were just calmly preparing to field an XI of children as they normally do and some spoilsport postponed the game!

calzino, Tuesday, 20 August 2019 18:58 (one year ago) link

Squeaky bum time in the most exciting footballing action of the day. I imagine "C&N Sporting Risk, headed by Henry Newman and Rory Campbell" are running round the office printing off bank statements.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 23 August 2019 21:57 (one year ago) link

Reminds me of the collapse of Hereford United where the scumbag owner didn't turn up for refinancing in court as he was "stuck in traffic" and the company was immediately dissolved.

mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 23 August 2019 21:59 (one year ago) link

Bury FC Crisis: Company which bought £7m debt for £70,000 and now wants £1.75m for it, reportedly owned by partner of daughter of club owner Steve Dale. Jaw-dropping detail in the wreckage of this football club.

— David Conn (@david_conn) August 23, 2019

EFL did some cracking fit and proper testing on this Dale fellow.

calzino, Friday, 23 August 2019 22:11 (one year ago) link

Steve Dale has been telling some media that a deal has been done. The potential buyers have told James Frith MP that's not the case. Yet. #BuryFC

— Chris Hall (@chrishallitv) August 23, 2019

calzino, Friday, 23 August 2019 22:35 (one year ago) link

we've had quite a few momentously big scoring win lose draws against Bury in my lifetime - including 0-6, 6-0, 4-4, 3-3 in the last couple of decades. I love Gigg Lane as well despite only going there twice. Good luck Bury.

calzino, Friday, 23 August 2019 23:15 (one year ago) link

we are going through the longest period of terrible football and sustained losing since that 70's period that some older fans with a slight touch of grandiloquence refer to as The Great Decline. When the designated disabled area is abandoned by the contemptible prem daytrippers that took over it like a fucking disease - i'll be happy to get a season ticket again, because half empty stands is the only environment that works with the kid. At least yesterday our useless caretaker manager realised Elphick is an old slow liability that is finished at this level, probably finished at L1 level (where we are headed) as well so a complete waste of a wage. It reminds me of when we signed Unsworth when he was an old knackered useless bastard as well.

calzino, Sunday, 25 August 2019 09:33 (one year ago) link

I've often complained to stewards that there should be an autism friendly section of the ground, and they agreed. But shite football is the only real solution for empty banks of seats.

calzino, Sunday, 25 August 2019 09:42 (one year ago) link

he always looked like face from crimewatch did this cunt, never trust anyone who spells Gary with 2 R's and wears wooly cardigans in the summer.

calzino, Monday, 26 August 2019 13:19 (one year ago) link

BREAKING: Bury FC Crisis: The proposed purchase by C & N Sporting Risk is OFF; owner Steve Dale was given until 5pm today for it to complete or the club would be expelled from the Football League, so this really could be the end.

— David Conn (@david_conn) August 27, 2019

it looks like Bury will be gone within the hour.

calzino, Tuesday, 27 August 2019 15:02 (one year ago) link

Ugh, I feel very bad for the Bury fans suffering at the hands of a bunch of stuff outside their control.

Having said that, there's a piece of me that would be irritated by their being saved at the last minute, rewarding them for massively overspending to buy promotion last year (my lot finished one point outside the play-off places, remember). I try to keep that piece of me under control because ultimately it's the Bury FC community that loses its club, and it's hardly their fault they enjoyed last season on the never-never.

Presumably the ground will be disposed of as part of an insolvency process? That's quite an important factor in any phoenix club starting up.

Tim, Tuesday, 27 August 2019 15:13 (one year ago) link

Just in time to play Exeter in the cup!

Tim, Monday, 28 December 2020 23:21 (one month ago) link

"The performances and results have not been of the level expected since Tony Pulis was appointed," chairman Dejphon Chansiri said in a statement on the club website.

"There are also other issues which have had a bearing on this decision."

James Beattie is still in counselling after getting headbutted by an angry and naked Tony Pulis in the showers after a bad result at Stoke over a decade ago, some witnesses described it as something akin to the horrific naked man-fighting scene in Women In Love. Perhaps he might have let the towel drop again whilst expressing anger!

calzino, Tuesday, 29 December 2020 00:25 (one month ago) link

two weeks pass...

I always have very low expectations of our transfer window action. But being linked with a 34 year old tugboat of a CB who was involved in a scandalous drink driving incident before rocking up at L1 franchise fc and a flop "flatter to deceive" midfielder who got found out last time he was on our books is a real blow during an injury crisis that has seen us frequently putting out u-23 sides and often getting narrowly beaten by ex prem sides that should have totally arseholed us. Oh well.

calzino, Monday, 18 January 2021 23:07 (one month ago) link

surely keogh would be literally a month's cover for your, what, 3? 4? crocked CBs, and then goodbye again

imago, Monday, 18 January 2021 23:11 (one month ago) link

yeah it's just a desperate temp move I suppose, but I demand at least one sexy signing with an eye on the future ffs- Duane Holmes is definitely not that. Even that troglodyte rookie-manager Rooney has got his number in no time at all.

calzino, Monday, 18 January 2021 23:19 (one month ago) link

mind you saying that we got promoted to the prem with the predictably useless flatter to deceive merchant Rajiv van La Parra starting every week, so anything is possible!

calzino, Monday, 18 January 2021 23:34 (one month ago) link

oh we did sign some young striker who apparently Bowyer was in for as well, and that is a development signing tbf - but I doubt he'll get further than the bench at some late point this season. #exPremClubProblems

calzino, Monday, 18 January 2021 23:52 (one month ago) link

Tom kings goal

— Macaulay Tuffin (@TuffinMacaulay) January 19, 2021

kieth chagrin (NickB), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 19:50 (one month ago) link

All kicking off at Leamington. Mike McGrath sent off for Kettering after a physical altercation with the referee , took it out on the changing room then decided that wasn't enough is tried to get back on the pitch to have another go at the ref before the stewards got control and gave him to the police.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 20:36 (one month ago) link

Just seen the video - the ref calls him over for something, he's clearly got a cob on and goes to square up but the ref has his arm out pointing and McGrath meets it with his chest, then slaps it out of the way so he can get closer.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 21:14 (one month ago) link

Leamington spar

kieth chagrin (NickB), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 21:23 (one month ago) link

In the meantime we went in 1-0 up at half time, then had a player sent off for something invisible to the naked eye that was claimed to be leading with the elbow (but not enough for anyone to claim for it). We then went down to 9 (apparently for speaking to the ref) and responded by going 2 up. We have no strikers on the pitch.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 21:35 (one month ago) link

gritty fare

imago, Tuesday, 19 January 2021 22:05 (one month ago) link

Derby must pay sacked captain Richard Keogh £2MILLION after he won an appeal over his dismissal following career-threatening knee injury suffered in drink-driving crash with team-mates in October 2019

I just hope this fellow can be a calming influence on the younger lads

calzino, Tuesday, 19 January 2021 22:44 (one month ago) link

Also congratulations tonight to Tom King, Newport's keeper, who scored with a goal kick against Cheltenham.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:20 (one month ago) link

it's in the tweet a few posts back if you haven't seen it yet

kieth chagrin (NickB), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:28 (one month ago) link

Haha sorry managed to miss that by being too involved in FA Trophy fixtures.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:30 (one month ago) link

no problem, i shouldve said what the tweet was anyway

kieth chagrin (NickB), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:31 (one month ago) link

looks like it caught a bit of a gust and then bounced in just the right place

kieth chagrin (NickB), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:32 (one month ago) link

Yeah, the Cheltenham keeper doesn't look like he's done anything particularly wrong.

It's a bit blowy out mind.

In a coda to the Leamington game, play was held up for two hours late in the second half due to a total electrical failure in the ground.
Mike McGrath's regular job is an electrician, so you can imagine the conspiracy rumours

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:48 (one month ago) link

Thought you couldn't score from goal kicks, is that a rule change

ukania west (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 21 January 2021 11:17 (one month ago) link

lol Derby fans when we re-signed Duane Holmes the other day: good bit of business - I'd drive him to Hudds etc..

and then when they found out we got him for free: “Absolute joke of a club at the moment. Ridiculous.” and “That’s ridiculous, another 700K write off for the only successful permanent transfer brought in by Lampard.”

calzino, Tuesday, 26 January 2021 09:12 (four weeks ago) link

Touches on the fact that Lampard's decent season with Derby leaned heavily on loanees, he didn't leave anything much for the next manager to build on

ukania west (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 26 January 2021 13:05 (four weeks ago) link

Not going to preempt the FA investigation but it looks like we've been caught falsifying player contracts...

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Wednesday, 3 February 2021 20:29 (three weeks ago) link

Circle, grimace emoji, send

imago, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 20:30 (three weeks ago) link


would a nit be nice? (NickB), Wednesday, 3 February 2021 20:30 (three weeks ago) link

it can always be worse, like for example Wimbledon who rumours suggest are about to employ the Cowley brothers ( ̄x ̄;)

calzino, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 20:35 (three weeks ago) link

wtf their own legend our U23 coach Jason Euell has applied and so has Powelly how fucking dare they

mind you if the Cowleys are safely employed when Bowyer is fired next week I'll breathe easier

imago, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 20:37 (three weeks ago) link

The short version is that it came to light over the acrimonious transfer of The Shop to Grimsby.

He wanted to see his contract because he was sure there was a clause in it that said if there were no fans then his contract was void so asked the FA for it. When he got it back from them that clause had been scored out and acceptance initialled, only his initials weren't in his handwriting and he says he don't know about it.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Wednesday, 3 February 2021 21:46 (three weeks ago) link

Glenn Murray, the Sir Captain Tom of professional football, scoring goals in his 90s to raise money for the NHS

Scampi reggae party (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 6 February 2021 15:27 (two weeks ago) link

Lol I can still remember those heady days when Murray was arguably one of the hottest young talents in the shitty leagues, at Dale I think.

calzino, Saturday, 6 February 2021 15:50 (two weeks ago) link

Definitely a good idea to sell him and buy Benteke thanks pardyoo

ukania west (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 8 February 2021 14:21 (two weeks ago) link

Our lot had got to Barrow last night before the game was called off, poor sods.

On the plus side, I have been enjoying looking at Barrow's club badge. Submarine! Bee-arrow!

Tim, Wednesday, 10 February 2021 11:19 (two weeks ago) link

when they have their big derby game against Morecambe coming up I hear they often deploy their club submarine into the bay to spy on the Shrimps training ground through the periscope.

calzino, Wednesday, 10 February 2021 17:20 (two weeks ago) link

are we sure that's a submarine and not a Lemmings level?

Mommas, don't let your scampoes grow up to be bacon fries (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 10 February 2021 17:26 (two weeks ago) link

League 2 is totally a Lemmings level.

Tim, Wednesday, 10 February 2021 17:49 (two weeks ago) link

On derby days they could replace the bee-arrow bit with one of these

Tim, Wednesday, 10 February 2021 17:50 (two weeks ago) link

It was a picture of a shrimp kebab but fuck doing that again.

Tim, Wednesday, 10 February 2021 17:51 (two weeks ago) link

apparently we have signed Ravel Morrison on a free who has had roughly as many managers in the last decade as he has played games in the last few seasons. probably a dud signing but at least he pissed off Big Sam and has a shitload of talent if he can be arsed putting in some graft with a relegation battle.

calzino, Wednesday, 17 February 2021 22:06 (one week ago) link

So our league has just been Null and Voided but we can still play in the Trophy because the NL proper hasn't.

Makes perfect sense.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Thursday, 18 February 2021 19:49 (one week ago) link

Bloody hell!

imago, Saturday, 20 February 2021 18:31 (five days ago) link

(to calz' lot)

imago, Saturday, 20 February 2021 18:32 (five days ago) link

But also to aldo's lot :(

imago, Saturday, 20 February 2021 18:37 (five days ago) link

Yesterday's development is that Gloucester are pushing that they might go to court to ensure they are promoted because they're currently first - although they have played more games than everyone else and would be 5th I think on average points terms - and have thrown out bitchy public statements at the club's who voted for it. I'm sure it has nothing to do with going shit or bust on the money front this year to try and get promoted.

Of course there is a special irony in them doing it this season, when the rugby team have been a complete disaster and have only got their act together once the league decided there would be no relegation and took the pressure off them.

Well *I* know who he is (aldo), Saturday, 20 February 2021 21:18 (five days ago) link

that 2nd Duane Holmes goal was sublime and it is extra pleasing because he is a homegrown town fan who most of us had dismissed as s lightweight with no end product and he's a very nice chap as well. lol some Derby fans seem to be taking it as proof that he couldn't be arsed playing for Rooney, who can blame him tbf.

calzino, Saturday, 20 February 2021 21:41 (five days ago) link

Just watched that goal calz absolute beauty

The Scampo Fell to Earth (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 20 February 2021 21:49 (five days ago) link

good day for the old warhorse Frasier Campbell as well he scored a scruffy goal, had one disallowed and got two assists, led the line like a good-old-fashioned-pro™. He gets lots of unfair stick but as a 33 year old often playing twice a week you can't really ask for more from him.

calzino, Saturday, 20 February 2021 22:55 (five days ago) link

Feel like Frasier fucked himself career wise on more than one occasion but fair play. 40 year-old James Coppinger scored a pearler of a free kick for Donny today

The Scampo Fell to Earth (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 20 February 2021 23:15 (five days ago) link

lord, he's been at Donny Rovers since they still played at Bell Vue! My brother used to work for the dodgy fucker chairman that plotted to burn it down for an insurance job. When my brother left his employment in a huff he later found out the dodgy crook had paid someone to break his legs but they must have been as shit as the arsonist he hired because it never happened!

calzino, Saturday, 20 February 2021 23:29 (five days ago) link

beware championship defences...beware 🤡

calzino, Wednesday, 24 February 2021 21:11 (yesterday) link

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