Sam's weekly 50p and how to waste 50p: The football betting thread

Took advantage of bet365's Champions League offer in style last night- place a bet pre-match and get a risk-free in-play bet. Put over 0.5 first half goals and decided to wait and see whether that won before deciding what to do in-play (thought I might have to recoup my loss). Goal duly scored so decided to go for a high odds one with my free bet - nothing ventured, nothing gained - so banged it on Sergio Ramos to score any time at 11/1. Nice wee balance going into the World Cup now :-)

£45 off a £3 accumulator. Good start to a long and profitable season.

Guy next to me put £150 on a skinny dog. Proper gamblers are nuts.

Igor Vetokele's equaliser in the second minute of injury time for Charlton at Huddersfield sparked a remarkable £24,243.69 pay-out for one 50p Football punter.

Do I have this right?

Most seats at 2015 General Election

Labour best odds 4/5 (William Hill)
Tories 11/8 (Sportingbet)

Assuming no ridiculous UKIP swing...
to win £1000 I'd have to put either £555 on Labour or £421 on Tories. So if I do both I win £24. Which sounds shit for a £976 bet - but 2.4% tax free is better than any ISA earns in a year.

Do I lose if it's a tie?

You have your sums right, but as you surmise you'd effectively be putting £976 against the election being a tie at very short odds.

Besides, there are much easier ways to make risk-free profits from the bookies. You could make more than £24 every day for months if you have £976 you don't need straight away.

how so?

'Months' is bullshit, actually. Maybe up to two months if you did it every day. Matched betting - matching free bets you get at bookies with lay bets you put on at Betfair. There's at least a grand of free money available across the various bookies, though it can be a bit of a chore. I just do it when I'm going on holiday or something and need an extra couple of hundred.

Today I clicked on this icon at ladbrokes that said if you get four out of a five-fold accumulator staked you get a refund on your bet. This is my bet and these fucking tossers haven't refunded shit.
Swansea 1-1 Sunderland Match betting Swansea 1/1 £ 0.00
Derby 4-1 Bolton Match betting Derby 8/15
Wigan 1-3 Bournemouth Match betting Bournemouth 1/1
Swindon 2-0 Barnsley Match betting Swindon 4/7
Preston 1-0 Coventry Match betting Preston 8/13

fucking wankers.

I think it's refunded as a free bet rather than a balance credit.

How do you claim this free bet? I have zero credit on my account and it was fucking guileless Swansea that caused all this shit. I mean it is only 3.40 but it hasn't appeared as free bet credit either.

my account / free bets

Tfw you get home and have a quick scan at the live-scores and 4 out of 5 on your acc is currently winning.

there I fucked it up, one equaliser and one a goal down.

Way to justify that 8/15 home banker status Blackburn - you set of cunts.

I'm going to petition my club to recall Payne, because you are an amateur set-up.