The Wisdom of Gaffers

mcleish fascination with large mammals understandable given some of his teams' football

interesting to see who can actually tell a joke, McLeish is none too shabby, Pleat was fucken painful

first iteration i ever heard of that camel joke was the racist one my dad told me when i was a kid

permaban bobby gould

i gave up before Bobby Gould, figured it wasnae gonna get any better than Robson's

robson's 2nd joke is almost transcendentally lame <3

SHAUN DERRY OUT OF NOWHERE

dowiiiiieeeee noooooo

that's londonderry, son

Gerry Francis you've let yrself down

Craig Disley thought he could have done slightly better and the keeper makes a good save but from where I was it's hard to judge until you really look back.

Paul Hurst, Grimsby Town, March 2014.

They're a tremendous group, they keep ramming everything back down my throat and that's what I want.

Paul Cox, Mansfield Town, March 2014.

There were a lot of positives from the game, which I will keep, in terms of we kept the ball.

John Gregory, Crawley Town, March 2014.

There's two spirals in football: one up and one down, there's nothing in between.

Steve Cotterill, Bristol City, March 2014.

We just need to play consistently at a level where we win games.

Dougie Freedman, Bolton Wanderers, March 2014.

I'm very disappointed but in English football you have to pay attention to the last, last minute of the game. This is the rule of English football.

Beppe Sannino, Watford, March 2014.

I don't think that's a thought in any shape or form.

Gary Brazil, Nottingham Forest (caretaker), March 2014.

Another day in the football factory and a few more mistakes.

Mark Robins, Huddersfield Town, March 2014.

We've had our own share of things not given for us so I understand Paul Dickov's frustration, I've been him on a number of occasions.

Sean Dyche, Burnley, March 2014.

whatever you do in work or life you don't want criticism

Alan Pardew, Newcastle United, April 2014.

I don't over-think each one as it comes

Sean Dyche, Burnley, April 2014.

I believe we can win games between now and the end of the season. How many will that be? Who knows.

Chris Wilder, Northampton Town, April 2014.

All my focus at the moment is the next game to try and stay within my process.

Kenny Jackett, Wolverhampton Wanderers, April 2014.

Yet I am not here to complain, I am just here to find a solution

Jose Riga, Charlton Athletic, April 2014.

I have spoken to the referee and it always amazes when they say 'it is in your opinion'. I have looked at it 47 times on my laptop so I don't know how it is (an) opinion, that's what I am flummoxed with.

Sean Dyche, Burnley, April 2014.

dyyyyche

Everyone's very excited because we've won a game and results have gone our way, but this league's like that.

Paul Cook, Chesterfield, April 2014.

Our work ethic was not at the level that it takes to win.

I always ask for a little bit more not a little bit less

I don't think some of the individuals have learned yet to be team players and spread the winning habit.

If the impossible is going to become possible, the work ethic has got to go up, the discipline has got to go up, the sense of responsibility has to go up and we've got to be prepared to play the game that we work on all week.

Graham Westley, Stevenage, April 2014.

Once they got in the lead they had that mindset that they were desperate to hang on to it.

Mark Cooper, Swindon Town, April 2014.

If you need to show somebody somewhere in the world where they don't watch Sunderland every week, you show him this game and tell him this is the story of the season and that's it.

I don't have a word because it's not one feeling, really. It hurts, it hurts because it doesn't matter what we do, something happens. And it's not an excuse, I don't really believe in luck.

Gus Poyet, Sunderland, April 2014.

Tom Ince will be a top Premier League player, without a shadow of a doubt. He's got all the attributes and everything else.

Tony Pulis, Crystal Palace, April 2014.

The people who jeered were born stupid and won't die intelligent

Lucien Favre, Borussia Monchengladbach, April 2014

We cannot face more reality than today.

Jose Riga, Charlton Athletic, April 2014

I don't think you can look at the table and worry, because it will just give you a heart attack

Chris Hargreaves, Torquay United, April 2014.

They are in the same situation as us, just outside that bottom-four problem area.

Peter Taylor, GIllingham, April 2014.

Dyche has surely delivered on this day

The margin in the end could have probably been closer than it ended up in score terms

Graham Westley, Stevenage, April 2014.

It feels marvellous and feels like the destination at the end of a long journey; an impressive journey from a group of people who are totally motivated and committed to stand the test of what a season is.

Despite what people think, I don't scream and shout at them all the time. I talk to them about what I think is important for them as individuals and the team.

If they realign then fantastic; if they don't we talk some more and if they don't then, they disappear out the building.

Sean Dyche, Burnley, April 2014.

<3

I hope when they try and nudge him towards Holloway type zaniness he doesn't reciprocate and tells them to fuck off.

holloway is a just a thick 'jovial' cunt, not reading dyche in the same way at all.....got a bit of aidy boothroyd in him maybe? not so stupid or negative though

here's what i said elsewhere:

he's at least as quotable as david flitcroft was last season, except that he has so much more dignity and gravitas, and is also a good manager

his quotability doesn't stem from wackiness and hyperbole [a la Holloway] but from his idiosyncratic attempts to express a coherent footballing philosophy at a club that's possibly never had one before

it's kinda beautiful

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPmY1grc_nc

has this been wisdomed yet

First record ever bought?
Prince Charming by Adam Ant (right). I loved the whole rave and Madchester scene and went to The Hacienda back in the day. These days my favourite band is Kasabian.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xY9oVjTdf08

Todmorden is such a beautiful place name

Especially when he says it

nicely expressed by imago on Dyche xxp.

The less you know about degenerate places like Todmorden the better. Hebden Bridge further down the valley, is stunningly beautiful with ancient rocky outcrops and an abundance of wildlife. Ignore KLF.

It has been so difficult to not love Burnley this season. It will probably end in tears as usual. Hopefully the bright spark prick behind the scenes who used big data (zx-spectrum with a 16k ram pack) to identify Brian Laws as the best manager for Burnley has since been pumped.

there posts by me from a couple of years ago suggesting owen coyle was a promising manager although i was probably just making shit up about a lesser seen epl team based on limited viewings in the timeworn jamie redknapp fashion

anyway that burnley squad was fairly terrible and he jumped ship at the right time, what are their prospects like next year?

I saw them recently (culminating in this post Rock journalism, football discourse and British mistrust of "technique" which I'm fairly proud of)

they were very good. for half an hour we equalled them but they demonstrated an ability to 'win the big moments' - step it up when required, demonstrate solidity and a bit of thrust, always be that step ahead tactically. I know we're only Charlton but I do think they can replicate this trick on some of the more abysmal Premiership teams. they're solid, won't wilt under pressure and can score goals.