The Wisdom of Gaffers

everyone has given me a positive yes.

Gareth Ainsworth, Wycombe Wanderers, March 2014.

Scoring goals is the hardest job in football, it wins games and at the moment we haven't got enough people who want to do that. I look and I think 'who really wants to be the one that scores a goal?'. Who wants to go and score the goal and be the hero in front of the fans at home and score the winning goal?

Richie Barker, Portsmouth, March 2014.

Tremendous credit to the boys - it's their hard work and perseverance, and them believing in what I'm saying.

James Beattie, Accrington Stanley, March 2014.

We've been the course and distance before

We looked to nullify them as they looked to nullify us.

Nigel Adkins, Reading, March 2014.

But the good thing about the Championship is that we have a fantastic game coming up next weekend at Derby.

David 'Ned' Kelly, Nottingham Forest (assistant), March 2014.

There are so many adjectives to describe how I'm feeling

Lee Clark, Birmingham City, March 2014.

It's not necessarily an easy situation to continually keep winning.

Kenny Jackett, Wolverhampton Wanderers, March 2014.

The second goal, just before half time was absolute comedy for me. Our corner, and then they score from our corner. You work that one out.

Gareth Ainsworth, Wycombe Wanderers, March 2014.

We would love to do that for the course of 90 minutes but you know at some stage the opposition's going to try and stop you or help you in some way.

Nigel Worthington, York City, March 2014.

I'm a winner. I want to win so bad.

i'm a airplane. i want to fly so bad.

I need three or four Sam Stantons in the team and I haven't got that.

I need three or four Duncan Watmores in the team and I haven't got that.

Terry Butcher, Hibernian, March 2014

We've slightly forgotten how to win a game

Justin Edinburgh, Newport County, March 2014.

I've had a chance to see Munich a few times, I watched them at Arsenal and they are a good team

David Moyes, Manchester United, March 2014

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b03yfqjb/Some_People_with_Jokes_Series_2_Some_Football_Managers_with_Jokes/

Extraordinary television.

Our chef is fantastic - he's open to new ideas

Sean Dyche, Burnley, March 2014

Bryan Robson making me laugh for the first time since he left management

yh the robson one is beautiful

jesus christ you can't get iPlayer within the Pale????

ban iain dowie

yeah for a second there i was hoping it'd be the joek with the punchline "that's easy, Joist wrote Ulysses and Girder wrote Faust"

but no such joy

mcleish fascination with large mammals understandable given some of his teams' football

interesting to see who can actually tell a joke, McLeish is none too shabby, Pleat was fucken painful

first iteration i ever heard of that camel joke was the racist one my dad told me when i was a kid

permaban bobby gould

i gave up before Bobby Gould, figured it wasnae gonna get any better than Robson's

robson's 2nd joke is almost transcendentally lame <3

SHAUN DERRY OUT OF NOWHERE

dowiiiiieeeee noooooo

that's londonderry, son

Gerry Francis you've let yrself down

Craig Disley thought he could have done slightly better and the keeper makes a good save but from where I was it's hard to judge until you really look back.

Paul Hurst, Grimsby Town, March 2014.

They're a tremendous group, they keep ramming everything back down my throat and that's what I want.

Paul Cox, Mansfield Town, March 2014.

There were a lot of positives from the game, which I will keep, in terms of we kept the ball.

John Gregory, Crawley Town, March 2014.

There's two spirals in football: one up and one down, there's nothing in between.

Steve Cotterill, Bristol City, March 2014.

We just need to play consistently at a level where we win games.

Dougie Freedman, Bolton Wanderers, March 2014.

I'm very disappointed but in English football you have to pay attention to the last, last minute of the game. This is the rule of English football.

Beppe Sannino, Watford, March 2014.

I don't think that's a thought in any shape or form.

Gary Brazil, Nottingham Forest (caretaker), March 2014.

Another day in the football factory and a few more mistakes.

Mark Robins, Huddersfield Town, March 2014.

We've had our own share of things not given for us so I understand Paul Dickov's frustration, I've been him on a number of occasions.

Sean Dyche, Burnley, March 2014.

whatever you do in work or life you don't want criticism

Alan Pardew, Newcastle United, April 2014.

I don't over-think each one as it comes

Sean Dyche, Burnley, April 2014.

I believe we can win games between now and the end of the season. How many will that be? Who knows.

Chris Wilder, Northampton Town, April 2014.

All my focus at the moment is the next game to try and stay within my process.

Kenny Jackett, Wolverhampton Wanderers, April 2014.

Yet I am not here to complain, I am just here to find a solution

Jose Riga, Charlton Athletic, April 2014.

I have spoken to the referee and it always amazes when they say 'it is in your opinion'. I have looked at it 47 times on my laptop so I don't know how it is (an) opinion, that's what I am flummoxed with.

Sean Dyche, Burnley, April 2014.

dyyyyche

Everyone's very excited because we've won a game and results have gone our way, but this league's like that.

Paul Cook, Chesterfield, April 2014.

Our work ethic was not at the level that it takes to win.

I always ask for a little bit more not a little bit less

I don't think some of the individuals have learned yet to be team players and spread the winning habit.

If the impossible is going to become possible, the work ethic has got to go up, the discipline has got to go up, the sense of responsibility has to go up and we've got to be prepared to play the game that we work on all week.

Graham Westley, Stevenage, April 2014.

Once they got in the lead they had that mindset that they were desperate to hang on to it.

Mark Cooper, Swindon Town, April 2014.