Footballers who really don't need to be on Twitter

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http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2896/premier-league/2011/01/08/2295741/glen-johnson-launches-astonishing-twitter-attack-on-paul

Liverpool full-back Glen Johnson has hit out at former Arsenal player Paul Merson, calling him an "alcoholic drug abuser" on Twitter.

The outburst, which has since been deleted from Johnson's Twitter page, was in response to criticism from Merson on Sky Sports show 'Soccer Saturday', as pundits analysed the dismissal of Roy Hodgson as Liverpool manager.

Merson said: "He (Hodgson) didn't have the luxury of a budget to spend £18 million on Glen Johnson, who can't defend for toffee, he's had to buy players from Fulham that he knew before.

"I don't think it's the players hanging their head in shame - I don't think they're good enough. Who would take their players if they were to go on sale tomorrow? Glen Johnson wouldn't go anywhere for 18 million quid."

Johnson responded on the social networking site Twitter, writing: "Comments from alcoholic drug abusers are not going to upset me and who is Paul Merson to judge players. He was average at the best of times, the only reason he is on that show is coz (sic) he gambled all his money away. The clown!"

Prince wouldn't ‘woa’ (onimo), Saturday, 8 January 2011 16:35 (fifteen years ago)

Paul Merson probably asking his PA to google "toilet seat theft jokes" right now.

Inspector Anthony Slade, Saturday, 8 January 2011 16:44 (fifteen years ago)

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/6959/picture1nam.png

Know one noes,, KNOW ONE!!

James Mitchell, Saturday, 8 January 2011 17:06 (fifteen years ago)

If only Glen's tackling was as hard and his passing as accurate as his assessment of Merson.

howie was a rock, buddy couldn't handle it (pandemic), Saturday, 8 January 2011 19:22 (fifteen years ago)

http://cg.scs.carleton.ca/~luc/KurtSchwitters--Merz-Cover-1925.png

max bro'd (nakhchivan), Saturday, 8 January 2011 19:24 (fifteen years ago)

Why doesn't he tell twitter about the press gagging order he's got that we're not supposed to no about?

James Mitchell, Sunday, 9 January 2011 06:20 (fifteen years ago)

http://www.metro.co.uk/sport/football/852573-neil-warnock-issues-qpr-twitter-ban-after-el-hadji-diouf-abuse

QPR manager Neil Warnock has banned his players from using Twitter to discuss club matters after members of the squad used the micro-blogging site to criticise Blackburn’s El Hadji Diouf.

onimotopoeic (onimo), Friday, 14 January 2011 12:49 (fifteen years ago)

fucking hypocrite

nakhchivan, Friday, 14 January 2011 13:26 (fifteen years ago)

From some interview with the guy who runs the Empire of the Kop fan site:

Can you name some one-of-a-kind Twitter accounts that you follow?
@kennethdalglish @pauldalglish @kellycates @marinadalglish @laurendalglish @lyndseydalglish The entire Dalglish family.
All he needs is four or five more followers.

James Mitchell, Tuesday, 18 January 2011 22:05 (fifteen years ago)

http://twitter.com/#!/Glenn_Hysen/status/32099577926524929

Inspector Anthony Slade, Monday, 31 January 2011 15:58 (fifteen years ago)

New favourite, better than Big Sam imho - http://twitter.com/chrisdawdle

James Mitchell, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 10:15 (fifteen years ago)

"Lots of talk about hellychoppers today. Petah Beerdsleep once gave me a lift in a Citron which felt just like a hovergrass."

James Mitchell, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 10:18 (fifteen years ago)

Jody Morris is on twitter. I'm sorry world.

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:06 (fifteen years ago)

Jody Morris is quite amusing on Twitter though. Compared to some dull footballers anyway. He does seem a bit obsessed with Tool Academy though.

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:20 (fifteen years ago)

I have started following loads of sad-sack rubbish SPL footballers. Graham Carey is the dullest man on earth, btw, closely followed by Joe Ledley.

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:22 (fifteen years ago)

Is Morris really okay? I have never really forgiven him for pissing a genuine talent up the wall and leading that nice young man John Terry astray...

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:23 (fifteen years ago)

I've got no idea if he's actually OK or not, he seems to just laugh at his old Chelsea mates and talk about Tool Academy all the time, and big up the St Johnstone twitter massive. @morriskid if you want to see for yourself. I only started following him because a mate of mine retweets some of his more amusing comments from time to time.

Agree about the talent-pissing, is weird to see him being average in an average SPL team.

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:29 (fifteen years ago)

Wasn't Morris accused of being a bit rakey in the dim and distant?

my Bébé just cares for me (onimo), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:32 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah, that's where it all started going wrong for him iirc.

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:34 (fifteen years ago)

Booze issues, not sure anything else, though wouldn't really surprise me. He got into a fair few scraps.

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:38 (fifteen years ago)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_yorkshire/3445187.stm

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:56 (fifteen years ago)

'Where are we going Jody?'
'To the toppermost of the poppermost, via the offie and the Crown Court.'

http://yfrog.com/h72n9yj

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:57 (fifteen years ago)

Bloody hell, forgotten he'd been at Leeds.

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 12:59 (fifteen years ago)

I am also now following Michael Duberry and wallowing in nostalgia for what might have been

Now, where's Andy Myers?

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 13:02 (fifteen years ago)

Kristofer

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 13:04 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah, I liked that too.

isn't house rubbish and Pete W mental (Pete W), Wednesday, 2 February 2011 13:08 (fifteen years ago)

Be sure to check out Michael Duberry's online clothing store for toddlers

http://www.mummysonlinebabyshop.com/

Inspector Anthony Slade, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 13:09 (fifteen years ago)

Duberry's twitter is really boring, completely obsessed with driving conditions/traffic levels between Perth and Glasgow and the carpark at Braehead (presumably when he's going to Nandos all the time).

btw, I have a mate who spells it Kristefer, which is even worse.

ailsa, Wednesday, 2 February 2011 13:57 (fifteen years ago)

Have we learnt nothing from Keysey? http://twitter.com/AdamLeventhal/status/33307339016777728

James Mitchell, Friday, 4 February 2011 08:49 (fifteen years ago)

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/02/08/article-1354825-0D15F12D000005DC-857_468x592.jpg

James Mitchell, Tuesday, 8 February 2011 13:50 (fifteen years ago)

Have we learnt nothing from Keysey? http://twitter.com/AdamLeventhal/status/33307339016777728

― James Mitchell, Friday, 4 February 2011 08:49 (5 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

not really that outrageous a habit to associate with the 'travelling community'

look its not that you listen to metal its that youre a bellend ok (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 9 February 2011 11:00 (fifteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

Imma try my best to do some damage with the time i'm given! Hopefully we will be winning when i get on!
http://twitter.com/#!/Carlton9Cole/status/41823916854878208

James Mitchell, Sunday, 27 February 2011 12:38 (fifteen years ago)

answer to the thread title: all of them, they train, watch movies, and go to nando's. that's it.

À la recherche du temps Pardew (jim in glasgow), Sunday, 27 February 2011 12:41 (fifteen years ago)

Imma try my best to do some damage with the time i'm given! Hopefully we will be winning when i get on!

So this is a bit of a match-fixing scandal here huh?

MPx4A, Sunday, 27 February 2011 18:49 (fifteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Liverpool prodigy Jonjo Shelvey's Twitter account has been suspended after he posted a picture of his penis. "Apologies for the picture, one of my mates messing around with my phone! Sorry!" tweeted Shelvey, moments before his short social media-horrifying career was prematurely curtailed.

mizzell, Friday, 25 March 2011 13:53 (fifteen years ago)

Hope Kenny wasn't following him at the time.

territory of the magic wand (Chris), Friday, 25 March 2011 14:31 (fifteen years ago)

Whoever said "it looks a little too much like him" both otm and lol.

Nult AGL (a hoy hoy), Friday, 25 March 2011 14:41 (fifteen years ago)

LeonKnight82

Before u chat shit ask yourself have u ever won championship player of the month

mizzell, Monday, 28 March 2011 02:33 (fifteen years ago)

RichardKingson

I've played in World Cups. How is the Irish League? RT @LeonKnight82 Talk about my career u better go get one LOL

mizzell, Monday, 28 March 2011 02:34 (fifteen years ago)

http://twitter.com/#!/LeonKnight82/status/51974335417696256

kid 606: the nultness (nakhchivan), Monday, 28 March 2011 02:49 (fifteen years ago)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leon_Knight

In March 2011, Knight suffered a Twitter-related breakdown, posing various "Before you chat shit ask yourself" questions.

you can be happy also (onimo), Monday, 28 March 2011 09:04 (fifteen years ago)

Michael Duberry, Jody Morris and the usually-quite-funny Cillian Sheridan were having a terrible #turnoffs conversation for most of last night, mostly aimed at women who drink pints, play pool, listen to rap and gamble. Mostly also consisting of Duberry RTing all of Sheridans comedy efforts. Filled my entire feed for about two hours as well.

ailsa, Monday, 28 March 2011 09:57 (fifteen years ago)

morriskid
Women who say no! #turnoffs
about 14 hours ago via ÜberSocial

death, taxes and (onimo), Monday, 28 March 2011 11:32 (fifteen years ago)

lol ironing. I'd given up reading them by then, I think.

ailsa, Monday, 28 March 2011 11:34 (fifteen years ago)

(I made that up!)

death, taxes and (onimo), Monday, 28 March 2011 11:35 (fifteen years ago)

sorta surprised jody morris can write

kid 606: the nultness (nakhchivan), Monday, 28 March 2011 11:35 (fifteen years ago)

former probation man morris will doubtless object

kid 606: the nultness (nakhchivan), Monday, 28 March 2011 11:36 (fifteen years ago)

Zing! (xpost to onimo)

ailsa, Monday, 28 March 2011 11:42 (fifteen years ago)

lol leon knight. he hardly played a game for accies

Algerian Goalkeeper, Tuesday, 29 March 2011 19:54 (fifteen years ago)

Can’t wait for the next time you post in here

scampo italiano (gyac), Friday, 4 September 2020 14:53 (five years ago)

thank you

オニモ (onimo), Saturday, 5 September 2020 16:11 (five years ago)

won't happen again

オニモ (onimo), Saturday, 5 September 2020 16:13 (five years ago)

No I meant Le Tissier does something progressively more awful every time you post in here about it! I don’t want to see what’s next.

scampo italiano (gyac), Saturday, 5 September 2020 16:18 (five years ago)

one year passes...

My Twitter Space is about to go live, to discuss my NFT project. Despite the critics, my NFTs will be the first ever that can’t lose their initial value 👊🏻

— Michael Owen (@themichaelowen) May 9, 2022

If we don’t let you sell your jpeg for less than £200, it’s always worth £200!

Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Tuesday, 10 May 2022 08:09 (four years ago)

maybe you can use them as gambling tokens on one of his virtual racehorses when it proves impossible to sell them, even when you win you lose.

calzino, Tuesday, 10 May 2022 08:41 (four years ago)

Add it to his other successes.

Delighted to see that Michael Owen IPA beer is now for sale in China and Hong Kong.
Join us in tasting our favourite IPA beer! Happy days. pic.twitter.com/KpUGtuIzpf

— Michael Owen (@themichaelowen) September 2, 2020

gyac, Tuesday, 10 May 2022 09:06 (four years ago)

one year passes...

https://x.com/Joey7Barton/status/1743331027123388893?s=20

vodkaitamin effrtvescent (calzino), Friday, 5 January 2024 21:30 (two years ago)

Why turn the replies off?

You don’t like hearing the truth.

Hearing the feedback.

Commie cowards.

Stop forcing your Woke, Racist nonsense on us.

DEI and Affirmative Action is failing.

Failing badly.

It’s doesn’t work.

Best person for the job.

Meritocracy Rules. 👑👍

— 👑 Joey Barton 👑 (@Joey7Barton) January 5, 2024

vodkaitamin effrtvescent (calzino), Friday, 5 January 2024 21:31 (two years ago)

Meritocracy rules, with a crown emoji next to a thumbs up

vodkaitamin effrtvescent (calzino), Friday, 5 January 2024 21:38 (two years ago)

Well I suppose it does explain his managerial career.

Little Billy Love (Tom D.), Friday, 5 January 2024 22:21 (two years ago)

three months pass...

Cricketers who really don't need to be on Twitter.

https://x.com/KP24/status/1777611224160588284

Hunky Tory (Tom D.), Tuesday, 9 April 2024 12:56 (two years ago)


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