best sex ever vs. best meal ever

i don't mean theoretically, best sex you've ever had vs best meal you've ever had

sex but its real close

felt really awesome & invincible for like a week after the best sex but i indulged so much in best meal i had a stomach ache afterwards

in the end, food is basically more important to me than anything

i think i'm voting meal

Lot of similarities -- a marathon compared to the usual, kinda dazed and poleaxed afterward, a little sore (distended belly vs. raw dick), feeling "damn, I'm not doing that again for a few days."

This is a really hard choice.

there's a creepy dissonance here, though, since the best meals i've ever had have been in the presence of family and/or friends, and the best sex has not at least as far as i know and hope, and pray

comparing the two is like yakkles and barfanges

we should do a theoretical one too imo

best sex - easy - there were/are far more intricacies and variables involved - vs best meal - the only variable really required is having the money or going w/someone who has the money to pay for it.

my best meals have invariably ended up with me overindulging and having a food hangover for days and days afterwards.

the only variable really required is having the money or going w/someone who has the money to pay for it.

no way! good meals require a lot of stuff--good company, good setting, etc. thomas keller can cook a delicious meal but he cant make it the best ever unless thats where yr head is at.

i think i'm a lot less picky when it comes to meals.

This isn't even a question.

I'm the least food-based human I've ever met. I mean, I like good food a lot, but when I put it up next to sex, it's not even close.

something that's never been fulfilling vs. something that was tastily filling

meal

Solitary threads that effortlessly sum up the spirit of ILX.

i hope said meal didn't come from subway, dude!

clean hit

no, but the sex did

6 inches or 12?

More importantly, did you hold the cheese?

was it good for the coke dispenser machine too?

Best meal, easily. Food is way more consistent.

but the thread question specifically ignores consistency. It's about best one example of each.

sex
sex
sex

xp still food then tbh

Yeah sex for me. Far more emotion invested in good sex than good food.

years ago, before facebook opened up to the broader public, i saw in my primitive "newfeed" this girl joined the group MEAT OR SEX??? and she chose sex

and i have been thinking about this question ever since

lol

lonely hoos just thinkin baout things

Yeah sex for me. Far more emotion invested in good sex than good food.

i got very teary when i went to a fucking amazing produce stand last week!

(so: FOOD)

(in Dudley-Moore-as-Arthur voice) "Both involved a 1961 Chateau Margaux."

I love food but the pinnacles of the most intimate sex would be worth starving to death for

For the orig. thread question, specifically the best I've had -- probably sex, but it's close.

Changing the question up a little and thinking "from this point forward" -- I'd say best meal. To achieve at 47 what I managed in my 20s sexually, I'd have to go into some rigorous training. But I could meet or beat the best meal I've ever had tomorrow, and keep finding new highs until I'm 80, without having to get in shape for it. (Heart attack worries would apply to both sex and food, I guess.)

thread really got me thinking about what my best of each was, and the memories of the food are far, far more vivid.

http://www.thefatduck.co.uk/The-Menus/Tasting-Menu/

can i just

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/215/526693529_f73e690f1f_z.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1051/526693523_80dab055bd_z.jpg

it's really not close, for me - the best food I love, a lot, I mean I talk about food so much people comment on it, but with real intimacy, being that close to another human being, being able to feel as vulnerable and alive and unmasked as you do when you really get to that point

well I mean I don't like to over-tmi tmi but I think truly great sex is as close to the concept of the divine as I can really understand, that communion with a greater self into which one's petty narcissistic self collapses: that's true-life-peak stuff

http://www.foodnut.com/i/The-Fat-Duck/Fat-Duck-Bray-UK-Nitro-Scrambled-Eggs.jpg

^that's true life peak stuff

but with real intimacy, being that close to another human being, being able to feel as vulnerable and alive and unmasked as you do when you really get to that point

People unmasked are enough to make me lose my appetite.

I love food and cooking but I can't even see how this is a question.

Best meal vs. best dump, now that would be a contest.

hahaha, i literally thought of that same joke like two min ago

i totally remember mine too :/

http://www.effettonotteonline.com/news/images/stories/09_12/bleak_moments_xl_01-film-b.jpg

I can go back and have the best meal I've ever had whenever I want, and have done so several times.

I have been trying to have the best sex I ever had for years and have not recreated it yet.

Best sex.

where's your best meal?

I think the best ever meal would involve some pretty awesome sex at some point and vice versa.

where's your best meal?

I have more than one, actually.

Two can't be recreated because the restaurants don't exist anymore (RIP Maison Robert and Aujourd'hui) but I will ride eternally for:

the fusion dim sum at Ginger Park in Back Bay Boston
the lobster rolls at this hole-in-the-wall in Maine that I'm blanking on the name of, but is on the outskirts of Kennebunkport
the 10-course prix fixe menu at Graham Elliot in Chicago
ribs in Tennessee; it doesn't really matter where

as much I love food I've never finished dinner and gone "well, everything's changed now, I'm now in touch with places in my heart/spirit that I didn't even know existed"

I mean I do say things like "holy fucking Christ thank God for Paris, who'd have thought a round loaf of bread filled with runny cheese could be that fucking good" but if you'd have asked me, right then, "how many years of your life would you trade to have gotten a meal this good?" I'd say "years? forget it, maybe I'd suffer two weeks for this meal" whereas I would do prison time for the smoldering star-gone-nova change-yr-life type of sex I'm talking about

aerosmith is like seconds away from posting pictures

i don't even get what point Whiney's pics are supposed to be making

those were from my $300 meal at Fat Duck

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_O0v1GNzrYvA/SuQsaBZlLEI/AAAAAAAAAZk/NRK1t-gTo_Y/s400/best-i-ever-had.jpg

the first one looks like bubbling soap with garnish

I have to say, the Graham Elliot meal was a trip and a half and I am considering a trip to Chicago solely to eat there again.

aerosmith is like seconds away from posting pictures

was just waiting for the prompt, this press photo got shot down by three different labels

http://www.suzi9mm.com/photo/i-cry-after-giving-head.jpg

prix fixe

Do Americans pronounce it "pricks fix"? Because I would really love that.

xp "head in an elevator, sobbing it up as I'm going down"

Whoa that kid has Shirt Tails powers!

looool @ snoball

loool @ Abbott

This isn't even a question.

I'm the least food-based human I've ever met. I mean, I like good food a lot, but when I put it up next to sex, it's not even close.

You should meet me then, the true least food-obsessed human, and we can talk about…you know…something other than food, I guess.

food

But yeah, the fact that this is a question sorta blows my mind. I know everyone likes food a lot, but I'm imagining a situation where the door on the left leads to a fantastic meal, and the door on the right leads to fantastic sex, and you choose the food door. And then I'm imagining that there's a hell and that it's the version where you have to view a loop of your most mindboggling mistakes in life, and that the leading clip is you eating a meal and then shitting out that meal the next morning while your hot sex opportunity goes disappointed next door.

I mean, but you're dealing in fantasy. It's def probably much easier to imagine the hottest sex than the yummiest food.

i think it's easier to imagine an uncomplicated amazing meal than uncomplicated amazing sex

the true least food-obsessed human

irl lol

i do think it's lol that Z_S sees every meal from where he takes his first bite to when he ultimately shits it out

and just to say what I would imagine a few of us who're voting "best sex" are thinking: "best sex" isn't like, "hottest sex" exclusively; you're pretty unlikely to have it with a stranger imo, it's not about technique or hot bodies or w/e. it involves very intense emotions, feelings of love & gratitude & acceptance & being able to feel at home in your skin, something a lot of people (raising hand here) have a lifelong problem with. food can comfort and thrill but it can't look you in the eyes and communicate a feeling of acceptance. and I know whiney'll be like "lol you're gonna post pictures!" but guess what jack the board's called "I Love Too Much Information" and if you can't stand the heat get out from under the covers lol

It's def probably much easier to imagine remember the hottest sex than the yummiest food.

I am gonna think about/cherish/remember awesome hot sex on my death bed, I bet, rather than food. I know "death bed" is a morbid rubric.

tbf I will probably be having more food than sex on my deathbed

theoretically i would take the best sex ever with a person of my choice than the best meal ever prepared by a chef of my choice, but unfortunately that isn't a reality -- also that wasn't the poll question!

man abbott & me are separated-by-birth types, I know for a fact that I will be rememberin' my favorite sexings on my deathbed

it's gonna be hella awkward with all the priests around tho

"last rites, aawwwwwww yeahhhhhh!"

xp - catholic priest/altar boy joke

tbf I will probably be having more food than sex on my deathbed

Totally lacking in ambition, here.

Think of Félix Faure, for example.

Il voulait être César, il ne fut que Pompée

I had my best meal ever at César

sex but its real close

This.

sex, not even close
I'll always take middling sex over great food, tbh.

in general, I'd vote "meal" cuz I'm such a huge fan of eating good food, but in keeping with j0rdan's request to compare the best in each category, sex wins narrowly because there was one session that was so ridiculously awesome that it beat out the amazingest meal I had in New York.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

trouncing

free and single vs. married/ltr

one thing that wasn't discussed is that you can attempt to eat the best meal ever whenever you want (provided you have the funds for the restaurants or ingredient). If you want to make a run at it tomorrow, you can make arrangements and make it happen. Not so for sex (unless you pay for sex which would seem to disqualify you), which imo makes the best sex ever even more special and unique.

Like, the witnessing a solar eclipse wouldn't be so cool if you could make it happen tomorrow evening on your command.

*orders solar eclipse for tomorrow evening*

*strokes cat*

this thread has inspired me however to have sex at el bulli

one thing that wasn't discussed is that you can attempt to eat the best meal ever whenever you want

I discussed this.

one thing that wasn't discussed is that you can attempt to eat the best meal ever whenever you want

i don't know if i agree with this.

aero was killin' it with OTM in this thread, I gotta say.

I mean those pics of Fat Duck dinners put me off fine dining for life (also I almost typed "fat fuck" then, and also also I keep thinking of that scene from IT Crowd where they're at a Blumentahl pisstake resto and are drinking a "wine" that is basically milk and eating forks)

i have no idea why i thought the 'sex' vote was a difficult one a year ago.

i don't know if i agree with this.

depends on what we mean by best meal ever (is it just the food itself, or is it also the atmosphere/context/whatever), i guess. but to me it still seems way easier to look up a bunch of recipes, gather ingredients, and make something, or to go back to the restaurant that once made your best meal ever and order something again, than to attempt to have the best sex ever, which depends on your partner or partners.

although, i guess if you're partner is president of the Best Sex Ever Club, it would probably be pretty easy! :)

http://i54.tinypic.com/2zgggg8.jpg
(President of the Best Sex Ever Club)

I really can't even come up with specific candidates. For either.

Molecular sexonomy.

How about having the best sex ever while eating the best meal ever? (Insert George Costanza reference here.)

i think about this poll too much prob

re-run it with weird variations

the chance to eat the meal you most enjoyed eating, again, but as if it was prepared one week later in time using the same ingredients, VS, the chance to experience dissatisfying sex you have been involved in, but from the other person's perspective

I can go back and have the best meal I've ever had whenever I want, and have done so several times.

I have been trying to have the best sex I ever had for years and have not recreated it yet.

Best sex.

― GLEERILLAZ! (HI DERE)

i nodded sagely throughout this point, and then you picked sex and i was uh no

tbf a pommel horse is pretty hard to get upstairs and into the bedroom

i think even when i was younger and less disgusted by the very idea of sex i still would have voted food

never change, strongo

I see that I needn't amend my vote from several years ago. Good sex and good food are an excellent pairing.

It depends how decadent and filling the food was, unless you're into pre-sex purging.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE

re-run it with weird variations

the chance to eat the meal you most enjoyed eating, again, but as if it was prepared one week later in time using the same ingredients, VS, the chance to experience dissatisfying sex you have been involved in, but from the other person's perspective

― kristof-profiting-from-a-childs-illiteracy.html (schlump), Monday, December 24, 2012 1:42 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

about the only variations in my last several years:

the chance to experience dissatisfying sex you have been involved in, but from the other person's perspective, VS,
the chance to experience dissatisfying sex you have been involved in, but the other person pretends it's satisfactory only to dump all their issues on you, all at once, for maximum ammunition in a future argument, VS,
the chance to experience sex that you have been involved in, and is dissatisfying from your own perspective as well as your partner's, VS,
the chance to experience dissatisfying sex you have been involved in, and no other person is involved

I think you're looking for the "autobiography: my complete recent sexual history" poll thread

no, but there wasn't a "self-effacing half answers that all but one ilxor will find either amusing or inoffensive" thread

We're four years older lads did we cop on enough and eat at better restaurants since because it's food, 100%

i would vote sex now... i think

I would've voted for meal then. Not sure now.

I like the idea of a good Saturday lunch and taking home leftovers whereas guys can't stop sex halfway and say, "Eh, I'll finish it Wednesday."

it's called edging you prude

it's called unnecessary

You can have both.

At the same time

#livinontheedge

when you're eating, or basking in a post-meal glow when you feel like your pores are opening up and your body is telling you to rest and you can enjoy the company and surrounds, you are still basically yourself and in control. if you're eating something a stranger has cooked for you it's a v passive experience, there's no personal investment, no effort, no responsiveness or communication, no sense of immanence. the intensity of chemicals in yr mouth isn't comparable to the intensity of another person all over you. can only conclude ppl going for meal are control freaks and misanthropes

I'm usually fucking while I'm eating a big bowl of pasta and I always pass out midway wake up 3 days later and then finish up

The sex or the pasta

both, thought that was obvious

Viagra changing the erection game

Pfft it's a long way behind the garlic press in the respective fields tbh

Something we haven't broached

Variety of possible food pleasures vs the realistic range of sexual delights

Three great meals a day the rest of my life? Lotto win.

Great sex three times a day for the rest of my life? Chore by Thursday lunchtime mmmmm lunchtime

Lmao

there's a creepy dissonance here, though, since the best meals i've ever had have been in the presence of family and/or friends, and the best sex has not at least as far as i know and hope, and pray

prude

Voted meal then. Would vote meal now.

sex without a second of hesitation

i eat good meals all the time, whether i'm cooking or eating out. there are opportunities to enjoy delicious meals 3x a day. sex is a little harder to come by with that frequency, best i can do is 1x a week and since we are both usually exhausted all the time it is unlikely to be the "best sex ever"

I'll always take middling sex over great food, tbh.

― boots get knocked from here to czechoslovakier (milo z), Saturday, October 16, 2010 8:23 PM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

agree w/ this too tbh

best packet of crisps you've ever had vs mediocre masturbation

mediocre masturbation

Unfair question ye don't have real tayto

i eat good meals all the time, whether i'm cooking or eating out. there are opportunities to enjoy delicious meals 3x a day. sex is a little harder to come by with that frequency, best i can do is 1x a week and since we are both usually exhausted all the time it is unlikely to be the "best sex ever"

― marcos, Monday, 20 March 2017 13:36 (twenty-six minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Already accepted upthread as a good argument for food

cheating on your spouse after a decade of sexless marriage vs eating yr meat of choice after a decade of veganism

i have done the latter, it was pan-fried soft-shelled crab and it was one of the most delicious things i've eaten in my life.

at the time I voted I was getting both. given my current drought sex would walk this lol

still trying to figure out why out of the pictures available, Whiney chose a picture of an iPod crammed into a seashell as evocative of a great meal
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1051/526693523_80dab055bd_z.jpg

cheating on your spouse after a decade of sexless marriage vs eating yr meat of choice after a decade of veganism

― ogmor, Monday, March 20, 2017

cheating on your spouse with a tuna salad

laughing alone while cheating on your spouse with a tuna salad

https://image.shutterstock.com/z/stock-photo-asian-man-eating-salad-393177625.jpg

Well that's a bit close to the public bone

best packet of crisps you've ever had vs mediocre masturbation

Best packet of crisps easily - those KP beef flavour...

thats actually a harder q to a

Busting a nut on a pizza vs. busting a nut on a French fry

I'll take "two types of people never welcome in my house" for $500

Ilx food and bloody tea fanatics trying to fake news this but the answer very obviously is best sex.

I love the basic-baiting of this question, call it what you want but if you're vehement you're wrong

That is true. But seeing how serious people get abt their tea here, this question is a doozy tbh.

for some best sex ever and best meal ever may be the same answer

http://www.youtube.com/vLKhJnKrf9M

https://youtu.be/vLKhJnKrf9M

for some best sex ever and best meal ever may be the same answer

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armin_Meiwes

idk if it's sad or not that I already know who that is without even opening the article

While in prison, Meiwes has since become a vegetarian.

<3

best Rich Tea vs best Chocolate Digestive

Out yacuncha

oh I see, you're a Chocolate Hob-nob kind of person

There's probably the Heston Blumenthal of sex out there, sea-shell with an iPod inside and half-month's-rent to enter and all.

And then the flipside of that, having lived with a gal who was a great cook and worked at Whole Foods (employee discount!), and the homemade meals were, on the right night, as transcendent as anything, and homemade with love.

ok, some people in this thread have obviously had way better sex than i have

i am no longer the true least food-obsessed human

i still don't think it's even close, though

it isnt

i stand by the excellent points i made upthread

food < sex < shitting

I feel aerosmith's posts itt

dlh doing at least two of the big three all wrong imo

put something in my digestive system and my only thought is how quickly it can be gotten out tbh

speaking of, but still slightly off-topic, it would be neat to route a loop of string through the mouth, down the esophagus, through the digestive system, and out the ass, then all the way back again - like a pulley system. then, finally, it would be possible to "eat food" by attaching it to the string, pulling it into the digestive system, then pulling it out whenever you want, either out the back end or through the mouth. could be sexy too

imagine stringing up some pearl onions, or shit kebabs

karl,,,,, thanks

hieronymous nosh

:D

16 people make me feel sad for them but that’s patronizing and it takes all kinds

i got my wish

https://i.imgur.com/zJW5Ywx_d.jpg

16 people make me feel sad for them but that’s patronizing and it takes all kinds

― El Tomboto

if it helps i find the notion of "good sex" literally incomprehensible, it's not a question of "regret" at this point, more like "sure, if you say so dad"

soda gets the fiver

like

i can imagine me eating the best meal ever and its a nice thought, lovely, ill have what hes having type of thing

i can just about imagine me having the best sex ever and no matter the prospective partner in this scenario the fact remains that itll include me and it ruins it rly

Common denominator fella

But also youve given yr guy a rest which is all well and good

Do the same with this subject srsly

As specific as my fantasies get, I can’t actually imagine having any real life sex be as memorable as, say, frying and eating an egg.

I find ppl who are really into sex slightly less tedious than ppl who are really into weed. It’s like, okay, chill already, we’ve all heard of both sex and weed.

It pleases me that if asked two years ago I would have chosen “meal”, but not now.

would have said sex no contest til I tried nashville hot chicken pringles

Attaboy

Also ppl i know who are super into sex are p low key abt it

Not sure what infidels youre hanging w silbs

That attaboy was to ma77ykin5 obvs

i've reversed my opinion on this

a really great meal is super fun but it doesn't give me the same high as after really great sex

Distressing discovery: what would have been a really great self-indulgent meal just a couple of years ago now tends to just leave me bloated and disgusted. It's probably a function of age.

That is terrible news. Anytime something you love isn't fun anymore, yes, probably age, but maybe the silver lining is there's something else out there that you'll be able to enjoy now you're seasoned enough.

i like almost everything better than food