thread to slag 2nd tier burner music / "progressive" "house" / vaguely ethnic thx system outdoor bro / yoga ho soundtrack blandness

i need a place to vent.

Here here

thank u

there is a big club here staffed with youths who have park city connections and fabulous instagram accounts and they play a lot of this kind of thing and it is SOOOO BORING. i'm sure some of it uses synthesizers and drum machines but it all just sounds like the most airless 100-track ableton session output with no musicality to speak of. and these people put out mixes of this stuff that are multiple hours long!

i will try to avoid naming names itt but goddamn it it's just horrible.

oh and they have a funktion one system! *makes jerk-off motion while rolling in trust fund money pit*

I'm going to need some names so I know who to hate correctly

haha ok then.

you're flying someone in from vancounver for your party and ... this is who you choose? really? like, i'm already asleep

https://soundcloud.com/flowsessions/flow-sessions-058-niki-sadeki?in=nikisadeki/sets/niki-sadeki-guest-podcasts-4

and that's the best of this kind of thing. there are some local djs i could name who are playing that but much more abysmal, but i am trying not to shit where i eat. it seems like at least 50% of dance music people here are into this sound.

it's not like i hate it i guess? but i can't dance to it, there is nothing happening! splashing around a minor key ominously for five minutes does not make me want to move my body!

*cough*

theblockslc dot com

*cough*

i will never be asked to play there and i don't caaaaaaaare

also, i know race and aesthetics in dance music is complicated, but come on.. this stuff is absolutely whites only in spirit. take a look through the ig account and it's also like, all the sons and daughters of the ceos of backcountry dot com and health care / pharma companies. rich people are really boring and they like really boring music.

Mid-pandemic we went on a camping trip, and were driving through a small Wisconsin town when we saw some people twirling fire batons and blasting music in a park. We pulled off and hung out for awhile, and the music was less this than half-time vaguely Middle Eastern dubstep. Sort of like if you took trip-hop and fake bellydancing music and put it through the EDM filter. I think it was probably part of virtual Burning Man?

Anyway for awhile I stood around wondering if I could produce something that clean if I had to, and decided that yeah possibly if I availed myself of all the Splice/Kontakt/Battery prefab stuff that's available nowadays. It's pretty cheesy stuff, but those hippies were having a great time.

yes, that sound is a part of this continuum! my boyfriend knows some fire dancers, and they are lovely people, but their events tend to have this kind of thing going on and it's hard for me to handle.

i once went to a show / private party they had deep in the suburbs. cookie cutter new construction deep in mormon land, etc. we go into the house and are introduced to the owners, a man with a long goatee and bald head and a woman who i can't describe well now beyond saying she was a good-natured bellydancer. we're hanging around their formite kitchen island and in comes this scraggly looking dude from the patio door, he is distraught and has the energy of a methy street person, he is expressing frustrations to the woman and then he goes back outside. he is the dj for the night, and half-time vaguely Middle Eastern dubstep was what he played. the end.

i have more tolerance for the trashy edm bellydancing music than for the classy progressive 'well-produced' house/techno tbrrwu

maybe by serially posting in this thread i will be able to let go of some of my animus towards music and scenes i'm not into.

Maybe because to the untrained ear the classy stuff is too close for comfort to the stuff you really like? :)

Similarly, I always think about the line between the trashy stuff and the 'cool'/critically acclaimed stuff that also samples a lot of Egyptian percussion, eg TSVI. There's definitely a difference, but you could also play a lot of what I consider 'the good stuff' for a burner crowd and I imagine/hope it would go over.

you raise good points

one thing a friend of a friend said years ago that sticks in my mind is, "at the end of the day, it's all just party music."

Roza Terenzi - Modern Bliss on planet euphorique
From Robbie Pires, 5 Months ago, written in Plain Text.

Subverting the patriarchy through postcolonial trust fund feminist journalist dj mix clang covid 2021 content creator in ozbekistan I worked hard for everything I've got, mondo man only do pills once a year at glastonbury and went to return to the source kids gone to university I'm so proud of them they fell in love with a Peruvian expat we commissioned a wagon of fondue to celebrate, got their corporate twitter bio no more than 160 characters a man with a podcast "was completely floored" by the real world part 2822831511334 100gecs2thisguiltyland bacon scraps, joint dictatorship of woke mussolinite gamergaters but I don't feel safe among white people for my own reasons I thought I could tease roadmans arse with my tongue and they would not twig that I worked as a scammer at cambridge Christ's blood as money what did the medieval papacy think of sodomy, union bureaucracy from below in and against prophet Joseph do ruku and sajda to the republicans turkish singer owns everyone at troll game very italian to stab your kid for being a superstar, please permit for me to be a high functioning intellectual of polite society with profound grandiloquent thoughts I don't think the printer union was saying that in 1926 mate, sat in a wetherspoons with the existential bombshell dawning on you that the English and their descendents have no cuisine king Salman with intersectionalist characteristics Miley Cyrus was traumatic conversion therapy that made you a raging heterosexual your phd indicates you want to maintain the world get hooked on crystal meth and drop out you are a cartoon get nate silver to back your predictions defeated by data science tyranny date a bird with contemptible friends smash the wine cabinet when your mates are enraged have shards of glass stuck in your testicles instead of skid marks on your pants have an illicit affair with your school teacher under the palm trees more underground offshoot of James Palumbo old Etonian biggest liberal democrat donor has a peerage in the house of lords ministry of polish we must care for each other person loses their purpose for life I'm so sad can only eat and defecate you love me don't you.

3/10.

yeahhhh gonna flag that post

i mean it's a very accurate review of this trend.

ah, ok, point taken, I was unclear on context there

I'm no Neil Kulkarni but I can try.

lol