rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

http://i.imgur.com/7siqm.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/qeSY7.png

http://i.imgur.com/BWQ2l.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/z6zhx.jpg

gonna be an important thread for future historians i feel

feel like you could shop the open end of that p'zolo onto goatse and no one would notice

wow the p'zolo is huge. truly something to behold.

it's kind of maddening. i mean if pizza hut and these other places would just take all the $$ they are presumably putting into r&d or whatever it's called in the fast food/chain restaurant world and instead put it towards quality ingredients with the aim of making simple (if greazy) good ol' fashioned pizza, then their products would be edible, something like they last were decades ago. the drive for novelty has become increasingly silly to the point where, when i opened this thread i momentarily thought these were just some jokey ideas that dayo or another person had photoshopped. the p'zolo things just look nightmarish. are they using half-starved drug-addled homeless ppl for their test-marketing subjects or what?

even mcdonald's has more dignity

A COOL COLLISION OF SALTY SWEAT

just bought a bacon sundae fyi

did it come with a decorative piece of bacon sticking out?

this is obvious but this is a direct correlation to the emphasis on drawing hits on websites instead of reporting news/doing actual journalism - these food products (see also the pizza with hot dogs in the crust) get the restaurants press coverage, draw in consumers who just want to try the products so they can say they tried them - it's all about boosting numbers

edible memes

consume the thing that consumes you

did it come with a decorative piece of bacon sticking out?

they
give you one big slice and then a bunch of bits

wow, that bacon thing is real?!

how times have changed

I could see the bk burger artist asking his manager on how many slices of bacon to put in the sundae

holding out for a vegan version with tofutti or soy delicious and some of those imitation bacon bits

this is obvious but this is a direct correlation to the emphasis on drawing hits on websites instead of reporting news/doing actual journalism - these food products (see also the pizza with hot dogs in the crust) get the restaurants press coverage, draw in consumers who just want to try the products so they can say they tried them - it's all about boosting numbers

yeah i reckon that's so but it still seems absurdly short-sighted. but whatever. capitalism in the nineties. or whatever decade this is

The p'zolo looks, like, alive.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3355/4574468954_24ecbdb89b.jpg

cant believe the bacon sundae is real

idk ppl have been putting bacon in desserts for a while now, not that crazy that a big fast food restaurant would jump on that

yeah my best bro's fiancee sprinkles bacon in coffee.

full english breakfast smoothie

Thick, Hardwood

^ porn names

and yeah, BK bacon sundae is not super surprising to me. makes sense: further mainstreaming of "yum bacon" meme, sweet + salty has been a food trend for a while. not a bad idea, though i don't trust burger king to do right by it.

http://i.imgur.com/dcnTf.jpg

I've had bacon + ice cream or bacon + chocolate on a few occasions and it's never really been a very successful combination. It's basically just a sweet thing with a few chewy out-of-place bits of bacon floating around.

I saw the P'zolo commercial on TV last night and startled my wife by yelling "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT BULLSHIT" at the television

What in the fuck is the purpose of the apostrophe in the P'zone/P'zolo, other than to irritate me? Is there something wrong with "Pizzolo" (the word)? It's not like they're saving any syllables, really,

A made up word can be trademarked.

p'zolo live once thats the motto ni**a zolo

is "pizzone" a word?

http://www.sogoodblog.com/2012/06/08/review-pizza-hut-pzolos/

http://www.sogoodblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/pzolo2.jpg

hahaha "The P'Zolo: Better than a Hot Pocket!"

poo zoos only live once

I have never heard of a poo zoo coming back from the dead so there is that

poo zoo was the first p z combo I thought of, I should've went with the second: pussy zipper

"coprophiliac zoophile" - two words you never want to see together.

pinata zoroaster

Pazuzuzolo

I guess the name was chosen because "p'zolo!" is the sound someone makes when they bite into one and spit it out because it's too hot.

If there was a Klingon Pizza Hut, what would they call these?

pizza vuvuzelas think abt it

so who is gonna be the first one of us to actually eat a p'zolo?

i mean we all know it's gonna be me but i just figured i'd give someone else the opportunity to step up to the plate this time

* steps up to plate, looks at contents of plate, walks away *

The bacon sundae would probably be good if I were really high. The P'zone thing just looks incredibly unappealing and I don't hate Pizza Hut pizza (although it's been about a decade since I've eaten it so maybe it's terrible now).

Here is a blog post criticizing people who are snobs about a BK bacon sundae: http://www.npr.org/blogs/monkeysee/2012/06/13/154911191/how-we-talk-about-a-bacon-sundae

see if i was really high* i'd prefer something like forty pounds of chewy bread and greasy meat

*sub in "really drunk" here since i don't smoke

this is not a chain restaurant but at the county fair this year you can haz cheezburgers w glazed doughnuts instead of buns, feel like that's probably old hat to people east of the rockies

I've had bacon + ice cream or bacon + chocolate on a few occasions and it's never really been a very successful combination. It's basically just a sweet thing with a few chewy out-of-place bits of bacon floating around.

― "Holy crap," I mutter, as he gently taps my area (silby), Friday, June 15, 2012 2:47 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark

yeah this was how I felt about it. I was thinking maybe they could distill bacon and brew their sundae sauce with some bacon juice to get a more even spread of the bacon flavor.

Blame Paula Deen for that one - http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paulas-home-cooking/the-ladys-brunch-burger-recipe/index.html

strongo you oughtta switch

that vosges chocolate w bacon (and other sweet bacon foods) are a gimmick, you could just use sea salt and it'd be the same

attention, this thread is only about american chain restaurants!!!

a p'zone is like a calzone?

http://pizzone.ytmnd.com/

that cat is completely in charge!

o what sad madness the bacon trend hath wrought in its wake

keep hearing the figaro song in my head except it goes P'ZOLO P'ZOLO P'ZOLO

anyway this bacon sundae thing is really gross, the lower classes are so vile

*pops melon wrapped in imported prosciutto into mouth*

P'Zones have been around for more than ten years (they introduced them while I was working my way through CNA school there), did they stop selling them at some point?

nah we're just pretending it's new

no see P'ZOLO see

hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good sandwich tube

http://i.cdn.turner.com/asfix/repository/8a25c3920ef15683010ef214f9770177/thumbnail_14429.jpg

P'ZOLO

p'zolo I luv u

Brittany Faulkner ‏@befaulkner
@K_BO_14 I'm getting a p'zone and Michael's getting a p'zolo (pizza hut). What do you want?
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http://bizarroiloveyou.ytmnd.com/

Max Silvestri
@maxsilvestri 24h

Pizza Hut's is pretty good, but I'll always prefer how my Italian grandmother made Buffalo Chicken P'zolo.

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Really hoping someone does archive all these. I asked over on oreo pizza: WTF if there was a comprehensive history of the pointless novelty pizza, but got nowhere. Where did it all begin? And when will it all end? Pizza is like the ultimate goof-proof junk food meal; it's transparent to everyone involved that these gimmicks are just attention-grabbing marketing hooks as discussed upthread, but since both customers and pizza magnates know it, can't they just, like, stop?

all it takes is one novelty hit like a chicken mcnugget to make it worthwhile.

but that's just a wad of chicken. they don't do anything WEIRD to it, besides the thing they do to make it into a wad.

what if they ground up leftover pizza into and formed it into a waddy extrusion that could be breaded and fried into a nugget?

i think i would try the p'zone if someone else ordered it and paid for it and put it in front of me. i would *try* it, not necessarily finish it.

oh, have i got news for you

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2599/4017063511_cf6ab72970.jpg

fuck, pizza rolls are good.

there are pizza-flavored potstickers that are pretty yummy, but they are asian frozen foods alchemy, not novelty fast food alchemy.
http://pds9.egloos.com/pds/200808/09/03/b0007603_489da987dc4c6.jpg

take excess cheese product, freeze in pacojet containers --> parmesan sorbet!

doctor casino I invite you to my thread pizza commercials from asia

pz'YOLO

You are now watching the throne
Don't let me eat a P'Zone

you know how many p'zones I own?

this might not count but i tried one of taco bell's new "cantina bowls" today. i imagine it's still terrible for you since it contains both guacamole-product and a creamy sauce, but it made me feel less like death than i usually do after eating there.

Cinnabon 'Pizzabon' - http://kotaku.com/5936215/cinnabons-pizzabon-the-snacktaku-hideous-abomination-review

http://cdn.cstatic.net/g/500x/http://cdn.cstatic.net/images/gridfs/502a60b885216d0e61004b91/the-pizzabon-cinnabon-pizza.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/g3upx.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/vIDJH.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/WM4b9.jpg

KFC literally serves you a bowl of hot vomit

:(

post some pix of real chinese food to make up for the queasy feeling I now have

I like:
mashed potatoes
gravy
corn
friend chicken
cheese

So why does this make me feel so bad inside?

Actually I think it's because the slightly transparent gravy looks like snot/bile and now I'm going to unbookmark this thread blech

friend chicken :)

KFC famous bowels

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfan5MacmsI
http://www.avclub.com/articles/av-club-taste-test-special-the-bowl-at-the-howling,2130/

pretty sure i scrolled through this thread than the encyclopedia dramatica 'offended' page

so disgusting

/more quickly than/

http://i.imgur.com/WM4b9.jpghttp://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0MzSeqFbaZY/TpzchghicMI/AAAAAAAAAAk/GC23OaCxtAI/s400/Royal+Trux.jpg

yeah i find it marginally easier to spend 10 seconds looking at the rtx cover

the thing on the left is presumably eaten by many thousands of people whereas even neil hagerty and jennifer herrema at their worst probably wouldn't eat the thing on the right

stevie not taken in by all that funky narration, a+ post

feel like we kinda dropped the ball on this thread this year so good revive

is it just the sweetcorn that makes the thing on the left look so much like a bowl of shit?

did sweet sixteen ever come out on vinyl? love that album so much...

taco bell calls its desserts "sweet treats"

no lie though I've been meaning to check out the new 99 cent grillers

http://i.imgur.com/5zoeS.jpg

The new dessert menu includes a new cookie sandwich which features two triangular chocolate chip cookies, filled with vanilla cream - available for $1.29. The menu also includes a churro for $0.99. These items will complement the company's existing dessert range, which includes caramel apple empanada and bite-sized Cinnamon Twists.

my goodness

http://i.imgur.com/w5krf.jpg

what the hell this honestly can't be the size of what you get for 99 cents

http://i.imgur.com/KSzCy.jpg

mcdonalds snackers are more expensive and nowhere near that big

http://i.imgur.com/vYH6e.png

http://i.imgur.com/XHXwJ.png

Frutista also the name of the font that ad is set in

today is the day that I learned that BK actually has a triple whopper out

http://i.imgur.com/y5V0l.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/OJAoU.png

reminds me of when I visited montreal in high school and we all found out that the mcdonalds there had a big mac but with three patties - of course we all got one, and were like, damn, canadians be gettin down on some freaky shit across the border, so amazing that literally you can just cross this magic line and all of a sudden you can buy a big mac with three patties and it's actually cheaper too (this was before parity)

Wow; I'm gonna have to get on that Triple Whopper. I once ate a Double Whopper a day for about four months straight. I regret nothing.

of course wendy's has a triple stacker too

http://i.imgur.com/mAHwy.png

mcdonald's sadly lagging behind

waiting for the mckie d's brass to be like... fuck it... we're going to four

four patties

*gasps are heard in the board room, somebody faints*

The McColon Filler

I love how there were probably hour-long meetings in the Wendy's marketing department about the wording of that ad. "No, no, we HAVE to say 'hot off the grill'; studies show it'll increase our sales 7%."

Dave's Hot'N Juicy Hamburgers sounds very erotic

Especially since he's dead.

http://i.imgur.com/hY8B0.jpg

I am told that this picture depicts a 'langostino lobster bite' from long john silvers

alls I gotta say is whomever invented Fried PB&J clouds deserves to die hideously

that sounds delicious

those lobster bites look fine but any form of fast seafood is obv evil

btw mc rib is back.

I had one two weeks ago

those lobster bites look fine but any form of fast seafood is obv evil

spoken like a man who has never dined at NORDSEE

truth be told, i've enjoyed plenty of battered sea fare that may as well have been "fast food".

battering and frying is probably the best or second best way to enjoy seafood tbh

You are now watching the throne
Don't let me eat a P'Zone

― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, August 21, 2012 9:01 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

underrated post btw, all I acn think about now when I hear that song

my friend just informed me I actually had a famous bowl in 2007

iirc Wendy's lets you double the meat of anything for real cheap. I knew a dude who got double triple burgers all the time. He was cool.

And then his heart blew up.

haha thanks re: p'zone line, it basically took over the song for me too

http://gawker.com/5972629/subway-quietly-unveils-creamy-sriracha-sauce-at-select-locations

tbf sriracha + mayo is a p classic combo

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/07/ibrahim-langoo-brain-kidney-kfc_n_2425917.html

I was at a best buy tody and saw this: http://i.imgur.com/r9nNq.jpg

all digital technology should employ an autoreplace that retypes PIZZA in that typeface

https://twitter.com/McDonalds/status/289059261479280640/photo/1

lookin forward to this

http://gawker.com/5979826/taco-bell-ceo-confirms-cool-ranch-doritos-locos-tacos-coming-soon

And Taco Bell doesn't plan to stop at Cool Ranch flavor neither. According to insider reports, the chain is currently testing a chile-lime flavored Flamas Doritos shell with the hopes of launching a mix-and-match variety pack in the near future.

so fucking excited!!

man, we went to get our locos tacos last week and I tried one of those griller things as a side-dish to my tacos. fuck that, locos tacos or nothing.

I've never been to this legendary Taco Bell in Chicago. How sad!

http://www.yelp.com/biz/taco-bell-chicago-5

That is amazing.

Frito-Lay announced the release of Taco Bell Doritos, which will taste like Taco Bell Doritos Loco tacos, which taste like Doritos.

http://www.latimes.com/business/money/la-fi-mo-doritos-taco-bell-chips-20130131,0,1915559.story

that's giving me a headache

so as far as I can figure, it tastes like...nothing? they cancel each other out right?

Scientists Warn That Taco Bell Doritos Could Possibly Create A Supermassive 'Taco Bell Black Hole,' Swallowing Up The Entire Earth

"This is how wormholes are created! Are they insane?"

Error: Taco recursion too deep. Stack overflow.

hahaha

(From that yelp review)

"This place is taco heaven with workers that are "nacho" run of the mill crappy fast food employees."

Guilty lol.

http://i.imgur.com/67tB4a8.jpg

gauntlet: thrown

It took me a long time to figure out that that was not a knitted burger

http://www.examiner.com/images/blog/EXID15166/images/oscar_the_grouch_from_sesame_street(1).png

Sandwich with fried chicken as the bun? Didn't Carl's Jr already do that? Or is that deep-fried bread?

KFC did the Double Down, although this appears to be a flakier breading

Oh right, KFC. I'll bet the real ones aren't so flaky. It kind of qualifies as trypophobic / trypophilic.

I saw a thing on nat geo or somewhere about a guy covered in benign growths that looked exactly like that

i've never actually had a shamrock shake. I'm gonna fix that tomorrow

ugh it's fucking made of mint??

made of, cmon, it's a flavor

put some toothpaste in yr milk and you'll approximate the flavor

it's gross

different mint types, this is more like creme de menthe

creme de gross

You guys don't like mint ice cream? Huh

Not unless you put some chocolate in it

you are savages

also, that haagen dasz line with the minimal ingredients has an awesome mint flavor

that creature IS a double down... a Zinger Double Down
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssgQ7mueuyQ

oh my god

lord have mercy

UM HELLO

I just searched for Shamrock Shake to talk about how excited I am that it's that time of year again. SHAMROCK SHAKES ARE DELICIOUS YOU WEIRDOS.

I had one last week I felt mugged

They can vary from place to place. I mean, I have like one maybe two a year but some are amazing and others? Not as amazing. I'm sorry you had a disappointing shake experience.

http://www.salon.com/2013/03/17/modern_chicken_has_no_flavor_lets_make_it_in_a_lab/

good article

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/la-dd-sausage-double-beef-burger-mcdonalds-china-20130321,0,2182161.story

I clicked on the link and one of the banner ads was...

Cut 9 pounds of stomach fat every week by using this 1 weird old tip

In this case, that 'weird old tip' would be 'Don't eat the new sausage double beef burger at McDonald's China and you'll avoid injesting 9lb of meat'.

https://www.facebook.com/DDBahamas

http://i.imgur.com/DcTa6A3.jpg

;_;

http://i.imgur.com/dUdf6po.jpg

the glaze makes it look like it's crying

Would eat. Two of them.

come, glazed warrior, join your sister in the pits of my stomach! (in brian blessed voice)

i imagine brian blessed addresses all his breakfast foods like they are worthy adversaries.

My recent coworkers roam the hallways on Friday mornings, the days most likely to have donuts or assorted pastries in common areas. These beasts would not survive the hunt.

Damn that looks good.

http://www.fastcompany.com/3008346/deep-inside-taco-bells-doritos-locos-taco?utm_source=twitter

crunch

these are some of the scariest looking pictures of food i've ever seen.

OTM whoever posted Oscar the Grounch. these foods look like they're going to start talking to me. or that they're made of plastic.

i've had a double-down sandwich before but the way it looks in that video still is so creepy.

deep inside that taco

Well, I'm sure glad they finally figured out how to do the dt, cuz that thing is awesome.

ugh shamrock shakes are terrible and i love mint ice cream

Dlt, crap

doritos locos tacos make me irrationally angry

I felt the same way about Cool Ranch almost 30 years ago.

Folks, please pour one out for the legendary BURGERPIPE -- Burgerpipe - The Burger Of The Future Is Here Now!

http://www.theslant.com/jam/images/burgerpipe.jpg

Cool ranch dlts are yum. Yes, I'm calling them by their insider name from now on. Which also makes me realize I might like a blt taco.

http://i.imgur.com/HIGQVFp.jpg

http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2013/04/reality-check-pepperoni-and-bacon-pizzaburger-from-boston-pizza.html

I would eat a burgerpipe.

(I nearly posted 'I'd eat the shit out of a burgerpipe', but that would have been weird)

Yeah, I'd like to suck on some of that!

Would it be considered bad manners to eat the burgerpipe directly as it's coming out of the burgerpipe tube? Like lying under an ice cream dispenser and letting the ice cream go straight into your mouth?

http://i.imgur.com/cqcSwW4.jpg

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2013-05-17/taco-bell-adds-waffle-taco-in-battle-for-breakfast-dollars

wot no syrup??

“It’s one of the harder day parts to win because you have to get consumers to come in and try the new coffee, try the new breakfast sandwiches. And honestly, it’s trying to teach your consumer to operate in the mornings and try something a little different”

lol i love the idea that we just don't understand but could be taught to eat breakfast tacos

doesn't a part of yr glorious country have a weathered breakfast taco tradition already? i think the idea that people can be taught to like a food isn't all that weird (like 50% of burrito places in the uk will, somewhere in the packaging, or on leafletage, or on the wall, explain what a burrito is); the idea that taco bell are in the business of doing so momentarily sounds weirder but isn't really (p sure people had to be taught to drink 'baja blast' flavour mt. dew)

tacos, no, burritos, yes (they have them at mcdonalds even)

'so what do you pair it with… a nice baja blast?'

there is actually an article about that uk burrito conundrum at the same businessweek site, that place must be gold to m. yglesias

also treats important issues like WHY CANT WE EAT EGG MCMUFFINS AT NITE

it's a specifically texas thing i think

http://www.gouramanda.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/DSC_00541.jpg

also it appears businessweek have done an article about chipotle in the uk at least once a month this year. fantastic

Norden is among the growing ranks of Britons with an appetite for burritos. A handful of young restaurateurs have introduced stuffed flour tortillas into the U.K. culinary mainstream by stressing the fun or exotic nature of Mexican fare. Fast-casual eateries like Chilango, Tortilla, and Benito’s Hat are expanding in London and other nearby regions where beans are usually served on toast and the Cornish pasty is the handheld food of choice.

Benito's Hat

That is the most British name for a Mexican restaurant.

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTuAu4w0i6QjN6VctSFXJnCLFfgeIoI5U5W-SzcdQ-7xTxhQHk-qA
(l-r: Benito, Harry)

srsly tho why is USA so happy to integrate immigrant food traditions whereas the UK still has trouble understanding pizza

'integrate'

seems like they prefer the foods of places they colonized and we like the food of our immigrants.

well, at least co-opt, deracinate, and mass-market

xp

seems like they prefer the foods of places they colonized and we like the food of our immigrants.

ding ding

there are complex geographic-as-in-socioeconomic and geographic-as-in-climactic reasons that people eat the foods they do the places they do, the mexican population of america is more than 50% of the total population of the u.k., a burrito is not a natural kind, etc, etc

britons only eat platonic solids?

well, a pasty is roughly tetrahedral if you squint

burritos are too natural, i thought you were a dead listener

srsly tho why is USA so happy to integrate immigrant food traditions whereas the UK still has trouble understanding pizza

I had a v. un-curry-like curry in a major US city in 1999, brb starting a thread about how American food is all idk canned tuna in Campbell's soup (the tomato variety of which seemed to be a major component of said curry)

great britain has never colonized a place where curry was part of the food tradition there ; D

i'd ask what on earth you mean by that but i suspect a major wake-up-sheeple component to the explanation

well Americans don't think Italians "understand pizza" either, if I follow yr post correctly

hey thomp: wake up!

http://www.businessinsider.com/ice-is-dirtier-than-toilet-water-2012-10

:(

co-worker: Ice in the conference room.
ILXor: Yeah, I'd like to suck on some of that!
co-worker: o_O

<ILXor goes to conference room, sees it's ice from a fast food joint not ice made in clean sanitary conditions>

ILXor: Noooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol

nice.

nice

baby

haaaaaaa

an excellent "callback" as i believe they are called

http://i.imgur.com/i487uqQ.jpg

What the hell am I looking at there? Liquid pizza and spaghetti? Is it a drink? A topping? I NEED ANSWERS DAMMIT

I hope it's just extra garlic butter for your pizza and extra marinara for your pasta, but even that doesn't make me feel much better.

I'm kinda hoping it is a drink.

Imagine how refreshing it would be on a blazing summer's day to visit your local convenience store and pour yourself a big cup of ice-cold liquid pizza. Walking out onto the street, big fat drops of condensation form on the side of the cup and you hold it to your forehead, relishing the feeling of the cold, cold fluid against your heat-prickled skin and savouring the scent of pepperoni and oregano drifting from the cup's open top. Finally, you can't restrain yourself any more and you bring the liquid pizza that you've been craving all day to your lips and take a big hearty gulp. Liquid tomato, cheese and onion surge down your throat and you feel the chill of it hit your stomach and radiate out across your torso.

You're standing there on the baking sidewalk in the midday sun, liquid pizza in hand and your thirst quenched. Life is good. Life is good.

barrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrf

well done

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/04/pizzaghetti-sloche_n_3380688.html

blame Canada

that convenience store chain Couche-Tard dreamt up a pizzaghetti-themed version of its frozen Sloche beverage

'douche-tard' morelike amirite

couche-tard has become a gag around our house in the last few days; hope it sticks.

Is Couche-Tard like a 7-11? The name essentially means night owl.

well, yes, 7-11 is also a convenience store.

right, but the name has to do with them being open long hours

That commercial for pizzaghetti is amazing

"Couche-Tard has a history of whipping up weird variations of the popular drink, like wonton, swamp and beef."

fuuuck these ppl

when has wonton ever been part of any drink

Actually, it appears that the flavors aren't actually the flavors advertised. Pizzaghetti is really Strawberry-Kiwi.

Which makes even less sense?

Fraise-ki peut

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sloche#Flavors

All Sloche flavor names are humorous and often gross, a marketing decision aimed at pleasing a mostly teenager crowd. The brand mission was described as: "To satisfy their need for sensory gratification and protest against authority, parents and society.

so you see...

The marketing is puerile but the flavors are conventional; disqualified.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=k5yo5UGsU2Q

it's pretty chaste marketing. but it stil creeps me out!

Couche tard, iirc, is the French version of Mac's, which has an owl mascot :)

wtf trolling w slushys wtf 'here at couche tard it's April Fool's day every day'

extra garlic butter for your pizza

what the hell

do people put butter on pizza

unacceptable

yeah that is gross and I even like pineapple on pizza

about time this devolved into a pizza thread

I mean jfc I'm all for occasional gluttony but do people not realize that adding even more grease to a super-greasy food is diminsihing returns?

Papa John's pizza comes with a little container of garlic butter. I have dipped my pizza in this butter, back when I used to order from Papa John's. u_u

the point is the garlic, butter is simply its vessel

it is also incredibly delicious and the reason i prefer papa johns always

Anyway Steve Martin was making "pizza in a cup" jokes way back in The Jerk, so like way to be late to the game, trolling Canadian convenience whatever.

Garlic is the one true God, and melted better his only prophet.

is garlic butter a condiment to grease up your pizza bones?

by "pizza bones" i mean "crusts"

hah, pizza bone sis a great euphemism for crusts

pizza bone sis was the worst Pearl Jam/Soungarden related band imo

if crusts are "bones" does that make stuffed crust pizza osso buco?

Fraise-ki peut

― Lectures of Pelé (Michael White), Wednesday, June 12, 2013 11:17 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark

c'est impec!

http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinchack/american-fast-food-items-that-arent-about-to-apologize-fo

#20!!

we don't have dunkin donuts here : (

i have had 1, 2, 3 on that list

I've had none of those things. I was in the presence of a Doritos Loco Taco last weekend though. I have also manually out fries on a burger.

its really weird to see these absurd DD menu item rollouts every 3 months, it used to be a regional coffee shop, you could get a muffin maybe or the munchkins (donut holes) and that it, now they're like maniacal food perverts coming up with all sorts of new obscene permutations of breakfast food

the newest market-tested breakfast whatsit is an egg and bacon sandwich on a glazed donut

Idea: The Cronitos Locos Taco -- A taco in a cronut sprinkled with dorito dust.

http://gawker.com/wendys-stops-rogue-restaurant-from-selling-9-patty-t-513257252

wendy's shutting down independent scientific inquiry! can we really make any progress on fundamental issues if food laboratory researchers have to spend all their time securing grants and running studies for their corporate cronut donors?

Idea: The Cronitos Locos Taco -- A taco in a cronut sprinkled with dorito dust.

patent this now imo

The Bakronaut -- a bacon cronut drizzled with sauerkraut and launched into space

http://www.thatsmags.com/beijing/blog/view/15475

its really weird to see these absurd DD menu item rollouts every 3 months, it used to be a regional coffee shop, you could get a muffin maybe or the munchkins (donut holes) and that it, now they're like maniacal food perverts coming up with all sorts of new obscene permutations of breakfast food

― ⚓ (elmo argonaut), Friday, June 14, 2013 10:02 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I was just saying this the other day. STICK TO COFFEE AND DONUTS FFS.

was really into the pancake-sausage-bites while those existed tbh, was sad to see them go

xp the hell with that, feed me more of your sick concoctions, DD!

man i could really go for a concoction right now

i've got a lot of time for these

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ikool_wv0o4/T9kbBVp656I/AAAAAAAAVz4/HlLhwtqEJ_8/s1600/BK_BBQ_Sandwiches.jpg

cue exploding heads of barbecue purists everywhere

followed by exploding hearts of fast food aficionados

idgi is that a pork patty and a porkburger, or is just the memphis one pork

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NO8V72pDw1o

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/

this is my favorite blog

Embarking on what CEO Emil Brolick called a “holistic, highly integrated brand transformation,” Wendy’s has begun a three-year plan intended to extensively remodel its stores, image and menu. This week’s adoption of an updated logoand new packaging and crew uniforms is one element.

The Right Price, Right Size Menu is the primary value product.
Wendy’s released audited results, including a -0.2% decline in same-store sales for Q4 and a 1.6% increase for full-year 2012. The quarter was hurt by the Mozzarella Chicken Supreme LTO in November, which “did not resonate with consumers as strongly as we hoped,” Brolick said. But he said the company is “very pleased” with initial response to the Right Price, Right Size value menu introduced in January. That menu—which freed Wendy’s and its franchisees from the previous 99¢ price point—will be the “dominant focus” of the chain’s value marketing, Brolick said. The new menu provides higher margins.

But Wendy’s won’t shy away from premium-price menu items. It will introduce its latest menu addition in late March, expected to be the Grilled Chicken Flatbread sandwich line it has been testing over the past year. Brolick ducked a question about a Flatbreads introduction during this morning’s earnings call.

Brolick said Wendy’s expects to have “image activated” (i.e. remodeled) 301 domestic restaurants by the end of this year. By the close of 2015, 1,331 of its 6,100 North American stores will have been updated under the three-year plan. This year, the chain expects to close more stores than the company and franchisees will open.

While Burger King manically adds new items by the dozen, McDonald’s and Wendy’s next week will introduce new mid-price chicken sandwiches with little risk because the tortilla and flatbread platforms have been tried and proven successful elsewhere for years.

McDonald’s McWrap is another idea it borrows from its European operations (where beef and shrimp varieties also have been offered), although tortilla-wrapped sandwiches are hardly innovative: Wraps are core items at most QSR and fast-casual sandwich shops. Wendy’s Grilled Chicken Flatbread Sandwiches uses a platform that has been a staple at sandwich-category leader Subway since 2008.

QSR?

quick-service restaurant?

tortilla flatbread platform

sandwich-category leader Subway

god bless you h4a

tortilla flatbread platform

Wendy’s Grilled Chicken Flatbread Sandwiches uses a platform that has been a staple

that blog is amazing

grilled chicken flatbread stapled to a platform

america needs to riot & demand[i]http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/McD_Poland_ChickenBox.jpg[/img]

lol i mean
http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/McD_Poland_ChickenBox.jpg

So you push a plunger on the top and it converts the live chicken inside to nuggets or what?

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/BBQ-Chart1.jpg

http://tacobell.wikia.com/wiki/Taco_Bell_Wiki

http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20081221002418/tacobell/images/d/da/Final1_copy.jpg

Foreign releases
In some markets outside of the United States, all references to Taco Bell in Demolition Man were changed to Pizza Hut, and therefore, Pizza Hut is said to have won the Franchise Wars.

wow, they have no idea about the truth

http://i.imgur.com/WTnpA2X.jpg

With condiment USB stick and wireless dessert.

omg I wish I'd known about that gross-ass chinese mcDonalds, I should have told my friend who's in Xi'an for 2 weeks to find a McDs and try it. Though on second thoughts, I *would* like to have another date with this person so maybe that would be cruel.

the kfc north america menu has remained stable for decades. i remember the introduction of the big crunch and the zinger and wraps and they seem dated now in a landscape of new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants. the only innovations over the last five years have been: no bun chicken, frozen corn mashed potatoes chicken in a bowl. kfc china decided to throw out the menu and start over again. i think the old beijing wrap was the first serious attempt at localization and it was a mild innovation and i never had much faith that hardcore localization would work, rice porridge for breakfast, black pepper beef on rice.... in their advertising, they started going with distinctly chinese themes (i always see the ad for the girl yearning for a taste of her sichuan home and finding it in a kfc wrap). the kfc model now is, like, all the benefits of the american fastfood experience (courteous chirpy girls at the till, open all the time, bright lights, delivery, one of the few places to hang around in a modern city, relatively inexpensive, omnipresent, 24 hour a day delivery) with the dullness of american fastfood replaced with a version of chinese food culture that is recognizable by locals.

mcdonalds china is, i think, still mostly about selling the experience of mcdonalds: mass american culture modernity and drivethrus and something distinct from chinese restaurant culture and a certain sophistication that's necessary in chinese urban life. maybe the localization is an attempt to push expansion in third tier cities, unexploited markets that kfc has managed to roll into and make a lot of money in. i dunno, rice in a bready wrapper is fucked up on the same level as quebecois combining spaghetti and pizza.

i'd like to try a p'zolo but i'm put off by the setup of most pizza hut restaurants, which is still dim lights and pleather banquettes and waitresses. if i'm ordering from pizza hut, i'm usually ordering a pizza to be shared in a communal setting and it doesn't seem right to order a round of p'zolos on top of that.

the only innovations over the last five years have been: no bun chicken, frozen corn mashed potatoes chicken in a bowl.

you appear to have forgotten...

http://www.randyclemens.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/doubledown.jpg

I remember reading that the double down was actually somehow less unhealthy than a lot of their other options.

So much american fast food and even "fast casual" food seems like diminishing returns vs. calories added to me. Like after a while there's only so much cheese AND mayonaise AND fried breadcrumbs AND bacony flavor you can cram into a thing.

no bun chicken = double down in that post

still can't believe i drove across an international border to eat a fastfood chicken sandwich with no bun.

xp to Hurting OTM

I'm decidedly not a food snob and firmly believe that if you want to eat something, even if it's "bad," you should go ahead and eat it and fuck the haters, but for me I can't imagine that the gross feeling after eating a Doubledown would be worth what it actually tastes like. Just the thought of how greasy my mouth would feel is dreadful.

and fyi I will gladly take a bus and then walk a half mile to go to Taco Bell when the mood strikes, so it's really just about personal preference and, yes, diminishing returns on the particular type of food.

http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2013/07/the-year-in-hot-dog-innovation/277507/

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/science/dogecosystem.jpg

http://sportsrapport.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/white-castle-chicken-rings.jpg

Have we discussed the rise of the chicken ring yet?

I have not yet seen chicken rings for sale. But it's all just reclaimed, bleached chicken corpse meat pressed into shapes, right? Strip, ring, dinosaur, star, etc.

1) not american 2) i see this as something that has filtered upward from non-chain restaurants, not really a food laboratory invention. the lebanese donair and pizza place on my block in edmonton had a donair poutine, a donair pizza, a poutine pizza and a donair poutine pizza. this is in the same territory: pizza + poutine + shaved beef. most indie pizza places that do poutine pizza retain the tomato sauce, which recalls poutine italienne, but pizza hut takes the concept further by replacing tomato sauce with starch gelatinized beef gravy.

http://slice.seriouseats.com/images/2013/06/20130626-poutine-pizza2.jpg

http://slice.seriouseats.com/archives/2013/06/reality-check-pizza-hut-cheesy-beef-poutine-pie.html

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/science/hotdogpic.jpg
hot dog seems excited to be with two ladies

Faster Faster KILL KILL KILL

http://c767204.r4.cf2.rackcdn.com/3016377b-e8ee-4b21-b2bd-17f8ba8dcffc.jpg

39 megapixel burger

the kfc north america menu has remained stable for decades. i remember the introduction of the big crunch and the zinger and wraps and they seem dated now in a landscape of new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants. the only innovations over the last five years have been: no bun chicken, frozen corn mashed potatoes chicken in a bowl.

uhhhh i ate the bones

http://taiwanonymous.blogspot.ca/2008/07/cartilage-kebab-at-kfc.html

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2013-07-22/product-test-taking-the-pizza-plunge-with-neverwet#r=hpt-ls

http://25.media.tumblr.com/c164d8bea1581cf4f4d399826d6d4f22/tumblr_mqcplhUt821qzoj6fo1_250.gif

Once the novelty wears off, it becomes hard to imagine coating your clothes or shoes with the stuff.

Are you joking? I would coat all of my shoes in NeverWet. This guy must not walk in the rain very much.

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/

this is my favorite blog

― i wanna be a gabbneb baby (Hungry4Ass),

thanking u h4a, every new post is a revelation

haha i love that LTO in a burger context can stand for something besides lettuce-tomato-onion

also the endless pre-coverage anticipating the Wendy's pretzel burger

it's like the royal baby of burgers

the fancy lettuce on it made me feel guiltier about taking the lettuce and tomato off and throwing it back in the bag.

dude!

whats up?

the price of vegetables

i don't care if it's mesclun. years of picking off iceberg stumps and peruvian midwinter tomatoes have trained me: pop the top and discard all excess vegetables.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/07/28/article-2380308-1B080039000005DC-23_634x683.jpg

Somehow that makes me want to be a vegetarian even harder.

if i was just veggie for ethical reasons i would totally eat in vitro meat

B-b-but the cow didn't consent to having her stem cells harvested!

But a good hamburger is not 100% lean. Do they have a plan to grow in-vitro fat to get that good 80/20 mix?

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XskwWPbXC5A/UEKM-VS2AKI/AAAAAAAABHs/C_aJ63HTroM/s200/Toffiffee1.jpg

delicious stem cells

that's new?

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/BK_GarlicMeatBest.png

so far, american fast food restaurants seem resistant to the idea of multiple animals represented on a hamburger. i think. right? at least a chicken burger slammed onto the top of a hamburger would seem bizarre.

i've heard there are mcdonalds where you can straight up order a mcgangbang and they'll make it for you

but the making of it seems like a pleasure which you wouldn't want to deprive yourself of

pork accents, ok; full pork representation alongside beef or chicken, no go

Look at the garlic slices on that thing. Jesus.

http://i.imgur.com/5K9PHap.jpg

http://www.boston.com/business/news/2013/08/06/taco-bell-expanding-test-waffle-taco-breakfast/VawV1fjUCPzxmYOuPFBklK/story.html

staring slackly at this like it's an indecent gif in the nsfw thread

one of my fave tortas is one with ham, chicken and beef on it. mmmm.

i hate that this is generating discussion of whether or not a waffle taco is a good idea in general. waffle sandwiches of any kind are undeniable, like at lucky j's in austin or at my house, but of course taco bell are going to make a terrible version of it.

I deny waffle sandwiches.

Thrice!

do they make it so it holds that shape??

(please let the answer be yes, a thousand tiems yes)

gross. Aren't waffles sweet?

have you ever had a waffle

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/EpicBurger_CronutBurger.jpg

have you ever seen a cuter cronut burger

Oh barf.

http://www.cnfood.cn/infouploadimg/1209/1347591031.jpg

http://i2.s1.dpfile.com/pc/6d2014e91974cf847735ff6861a650f8%28700x700%29/thumb.jpg

okay. because it actually looks edible in the promotional materials.

I've been in Beijing for 24 hours and seen the poster for that (with the cool dude in the half-white, half-black outfit) in probably twenty separate locations.

Your mission is clear.

Went for the green rice-wrap burrito object instead. Not bad!

I had that too and thought it was awful

i just walked by a mcdonalds and thought about this thread and my obligations to the ilx community but decided on something else because it's a black hamburger.

i think reading burgerbusiness is making me jaded

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=15146

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/Bostons_PizzaBurger.jpg

Boston’s plans to support the Pizzaburger introduction with a social-media campaign that includes a contest playing off the online dating trend.

just... nope

my god

http://i.imgur.com/BhyOaO3.png

βurgerβusiness is absolutely my favorite blog on the internet btw. thanking u canks

SsurgerSsusiness

Like Tina Turner singing “Proud Mary,” Slater’s 50/50 never does anything nice and easy. It does over the top. Consider that its namesake burger patty is 50% ground beef, 50% ground bacon. So when the six-location, Anaheim Hills, Calif.-based chain decides to do breakfast, you know it’s going to be—like Tina’s rendition—nice and rough.

Pro Yelping.

the pizza burger has been out in canada for a while. it's kind of like a betty crocker cookbook or home ec recipe type of thing. the burger is like steamed meatloaf. it's not bad.

http://cache.5ikfc.com/imgs/kfc/2013/08/baopiannenniubao.jpg

this is an interesting concept but i think sandwiching more toppings between burger layers would improve it immeasurably.

does that say 'the flavor's got nowhere to hide'??

it should. but it just says: LAYERS OF FLAVOR / JUICY, TENDER AND DELICIOUS.

Beef up, stupid!

burger king fryburger is available here.
i have been eating too much burger king this week, cuz it's cheap and close to Issue Project Room. i get two double cheeseburgers & a spicy chicken crip, it is under $5 and filling. then i go down the street and drink abt a gallon of water.

spicy chicken crip saywhatnow

Spicy Chicken Blood nixed by the FDA, it was a big deal on Burger Business.

Spicy chicken blood?! Sounds more like an ingredient for a hoodoo spell. I remember the good old days when MSG was enough.

lol

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=15414

“One out of every two Burger King guests orders our classic french fries and we know our guests are hungry for options that are better for them, but don’t want to compromise on taste,” Alex Macedo, Burger King President North America, said in a release announcing the product rollout. “When it comes to what we eat, we know that small changes can have a big impact. We see Satisfries™ as one of the biggest fast food launches and are excited to bring this great tasting french fry to our guests.”

damn i really want some Satisfries™

http://www.qsrmagazine.com/competition/pizza-s-arms-race

incredible pull quotes in this article about the race to be the "chipotle of pizza," too

“This new generation, Millennials, they’re used to getting everything their way,” Grier says. “It’s just a customized world they’ve grown up in; they haven’t known anything different. They’re used to directing what they want because of the technology they’ve grown up with, and having those options and choices … we think is a big win.”

“We cater to all walks of life, all demographics, all genders, and up and down the socioeconomic scale,” Andrew says. “What’s cool is people get to be individualistic; it’s all about being yourself, and I think today that’s been more and more accepted as people want to express themselves even outwardly.”

“We think the paradigm shift to lunch for pizza is a major element in the success that we are having and will continue to have,” Zuckerman says. “Because when you can get an item like pizza—which is America’s favorite, basically—at lunch without having to take 45 or 50 minutes total, but you can actually order a pizza, choose all your ingredients, and then have it go oven to you in three minutes or less and be quality—not roller grill oven, but high-end, stone-hearth oven—people appreciate that.”

the chipotle of pizza is actually not the worst idea i've ever heard

yeah, guac + sour cream + corn pizza sounds really tasty actually

ketchup on the side

wpro tip: you can already order a pizza with whatever toppings you want from any pizzeria #lifehacks

http://gawker.com/5807591/grilled-cheese-sandwich-gets-10-million-in-venture-funding

i just

i don't even

fuckin a

We think the paradigm shift to lunch for pizza

PIZZA FOR LUNCH WE'RE REALLY OUTSIDE THE BOX ON THIS ONE PEOPLE

All those years having pizza for lunch and I never once realized that I was DOING IT WRONG.

Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening...but can you handle pizza at SUPPERTIME?

When pizza's on a bagel, you can eat pizza anytime.

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/

i've been away, god it's good to read burgerbusiness again

for some reason a lot of recent posts are talking about 'builds'

Cinnamon on a burger. I hadn’t considered it, but two burger spots—Kuma’s Too and Milwaukee Burger Co.—create Burgers of the Month for October that work cinnamon into their builds. Check them out. Not surprisingly there are a few Oktoberfest burgers among the monthly specials, but several joints—Grill ‘Em All and Kuma’s Corner among them—that peg specials to Halloween. By the way, Grill ‘Em All surely is the first to top a burger with a “savory pumpkin-sage polenta cake.” It might be the only place that would do that, which is why its customers love it.

it's really great - apparently gouda is "the trendy burger cheese of the moment" (their emphasis)

The October Burger of the Month at The Oinkster in Los Angeles is The Nick Offerman "American Ham" Burger, saluting the "Parks and Recreation" star. The build is a 6-oz burger patty topped with shaved ham, two layers of Gruyère cheese, hot-sweet mustard, mayo, and house-made bread and butter pickles on a sourdough bun.

where are they getting their information from

do you suppose they guard their sources closely, to retain their edge

i am into both gruyere and gouda as potential burger cheeses

i'm generally into gruyere and gouda as anything cheeses so grain of salt

i am into grains of salt

do you put those in your build

was really distressed by the latest burger business post

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=15720

Pretzel Burgers Can’t Save Ruby Tuesday
Pretzel-bun burgers may be all the rage, but they couldn’t keep casual-dining chain Ruby Tuesday from a double-digit debacle. Fast. For its fiscal quarter ended Sept. 3, 2013, the casual-dining chain reported an 11.4% plunge in same-store sales at company restaurants.

Ruby Tuesday's Spicy Jalapeno Pretzel Burger
Ruby Tuesday’s Spicy Jalapeno Pretzel Burger
The dive came despite the chain’s biggest menu rollout in the last seven years. On August 12, Ruby Tuesday introduced eight new products, including four burgers on pretzel buns, three Crispy Flatbreads and a tempura green bean appetizer. Six weeks of TV advertising that included national cable plus spot advertising in select markets backed the launch.

President-CEO James J. Buettgen called the results “disappointing and did not reflect where we believe we can take the business as we execute our repositioning strategy.” He offered several explanations including the popular “economic issues continue to provide significant headwinds” tack. Buettgen also suggested that a lower average check due to lower pricing for new menu items was a not-unexpected culprit.

“The new items are all priced at or below average, so the pretzel burgers are from $8.99 to $9.49, the flatbreads are $6.99 and $7.99, and the green bean appetizer was $5.99. So on an absolute menu level, or within the categories that they’re featured in, they’re attractively priced items,” Buettgen told analysts. “And we knew going into the rollout that we are going to see some level of check decline to the degree we got strong preference on the items, and that was part of our effort to showcase a more casual and approachable items, but also to give more value and affordability to guests.”

However, when pressed for details, CFO Michael O. Moore explained that only 1% of the 11.4% sales drop was due to check while 10.5% reflected guest-count decline. Added Buettgen, “Keep in mind that our guest declines have occurred over a number of years and will not be reversed overnight. Having said that, we believe we are on the right strategic path and that our efforts will lead to sales and guest count growth over time.”

The Bacon Cheese Pretzel Burger
The Bacon Cheese Pretzel Burger
While Moore noted that only the last three weeks of its first fiscal quarter benefited from the pretzel burger rollout, he was hardly optimistic about the current quarter. “We anticipate same-restaurant sales to be down high single-digits in the second quarter, with sequential improvement in the third and fourth quarter, including positive same-restaurant sales in the fourth quarter, reflecting traction from our new menu offerings and marketing campaign.”

He noted that more than 20% of diners ordered at least one of the eight new items on a menu with more than 60 dishes. He called that “significant and certainly a big step in the right direction. The initial high preference demonstrates how appealing the new items are to our guests.”

The menu revamp will continue with the “new food platforms and items that we have in test,” Buettgen said. Reflecting lessons learned from the introduction of lower-price pretzel burgers, the “products that we have in the queue are at a range of price points, some comparable to those we’ve rolled out, others that are more expensive and more premium,” Buettgen said. Those products will get advertising support more evenly spread out across all 12 months, rather than front-loaded in Q1 as it did last year.

Todd A. Burrowes, COO and Ruby Tuesday Concept president, outlined changes made or planned to improve the brand. These include improving music programming “by offering more of a contemporary mix of rock, pop and Top 40” and exploring changes in lighting and décor “to more accurately reflect our brand positioning.”

Finally, the sees a solution in making its employees more “genuine.” Burrowes said the chain will be “testing an enhanced service platform that enables team members to share their personality and passion for our brand by connecting with guests in a more natural and genuine manner. What I mean by this is that we’ll encourage our team members to make real connections with each and every guest in a fun and friendly atmosphere.”

really hope ruby tuesday can make it out of this slump.

goooooodbyyyyye ruby tuesday

Someone should offer to buy them out, but with the stipulation that they change their name to Cocksucker Blues.

"Oh honey, look, there's a new Cocksucker Blues in the mall!"

"OK, gang, team lunch on Friday at Cocksucker's."

Stones should totally franchise

Beggar's Banquet buffet
Loving Cup bar & grill
Goatshead Soup erm soup
Sister Morphine rehab

I will always like Ruby Tuesdays for all the times it allowed me to get drunk at the mall.

lol @ VG

lol Soup erm soup

have to say i've tried a number of different pretzel bread burgers the past few months and the only place that really justified it for me was steak and shake, really nice build

Steak & Shake rules. Love their Halloween quintuple chocolate shake or whatever it's called. Really wish there were some locations on the east coast.

bill wyman owns an upscale-TGIFridays ish called Sticky Fingers in London iirc

how's his build

gonna have a pretzel burger today @ lunch, i've been inspired by this thread

where are they getting their information from

do you suppose they guard their sources closely, to retain their edge

i used to date a girl who worked for the n4tional rest4urant associ4tion; as far as i could tell a lot of her job entailed finding out what the trendy burger cheeses of the moment actually were

i won't lie, it seemed like an awesome job

Bathroom themed reastaurants have come to America (apparently started in Japan or Taiwan, per comments, despite what the CNN doofus says).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDOktxE2nPU&feature=youtube_gdata_player

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/20/opinion/sunday/maam-your-burger-has-been-paid-for.html

You could chalk it up to Southern hospitality or small town charm. But it’s just as likely the preceding car will pick up your tab at a Dunkin’ Donuts drive-through in Detroit or a McDonald’s drive-through in Fargo, N.D. Drive-through generosity is happening across America and parts of Canada, sometimes resulting in unbroken chains of hundreds of cars paying in turn for the person behind them.

http://www.brandeating.com/2013/09/news-papa-johns-new-mega-chocolate-chip-cookie.html

http://i.imgur.com/ZiRHyFn.jpg

http://www.facebook.com/pizookie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8umVKXfcutA

http://i.minus.com/i7ZB78R66q80s.gif

I just don't want dessert from a pizza place, ever, and wish they would stop trying with their weird "it's a pizza shaped cinnamon bun slathered in icing!" ideas.

i don't care what shape it's in i'm always available to eat a cinnabon

Love that blog burger business.

hate that canada misses out on some of the more awesome sounding weird shit from the states.

i don't care what shape it's in i'm always available to eat a cinnabon

I would eat a Cinnabon out of the treads of a combat boot, I just don't trust pizza places to not fuck that recipe up. Always sounds like something a stoned employee did just before closing with a can of Pillsbury dough and a bunch of packets of sugar.

Also, to be honest, I almost never want dessert after pizza because I'm already aware that my actual meal was already 100% junk food and I am full of grease, bread and sweeteners as it is.

I just don't trust pizza places to not fuck that recipe up. Always sounds like something a stoned employee did just before closing with a can of Pillsbury dough and a bunch of packets of sugar.

and his dick, if the tales of late night fast food restaurants I've heard are even half-way accurate.

having made some crazy good canned cinnamon rolls lately i think the provenance of the pizza-place dessert is not that important

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=15853

i have never had a mcrib :/

“fewer more impactful items"

What a horrible phrase.

http://i.imgur.com/i7fW4bf.png

that was great

it's hard out there for the most successful restaurant chain in history, lay off guys

HIS OPINIONS ARE HIS OWN!

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=16072

drudgesiren

“Have it your way” is Burger King’s longtime slogan but McDonald’s is testing build-your-own-burger customization and new premium-price burgers in Southern California, according to a story today by Nancy Luna in the Orange County Register (OCR).

At a recently remodeled restaurant in upscale Laguna Niguel, Calif., south of Los Angeles, McDonald’s waitstaff in black or in white chefs aprons welcome customers at the entrance. The restaurant offers three new high-price specialty burgers as well as the option to choose custom toppings from the list on an iPad menu. The OCR reports that the test is taking place in an Illinois McDonald’s as well.
McDonald's recently improved its Quarter Pounder line. Will its customers let it move farther upscale?

McDonald’s recently improved its Quarter Pounder line (above). Do its customers want it to move farther upscale with BYO customization? That’s the test.

The BYO and specialty burgers—the SoCal Style, Hot All Over and Grill Thriller—all use the regular Quarter Pounder patty but are priced at $5.79. That takes McDonald’s up to fast-casual pricing: a 7.5 oz. BYO burger at fast-casual chain Smashburger is $5.99.

The OCR says the options include more than 20 toppings and sauces, such as white Cheddar, guacamole, caramelized onions, grilled mushrooms, creamy garlic sauce and applewood-smoke bacon. Other than guacamole, these seem to be foods it has on hand for other menu items (for example, the garlic sauce is sued in the Chicken & Bacon McWrap).

Tray liners promote the burgers as “Real. Freshly Grilled. One of a Kind,” the OCR says.

Not Fictional. Recently Unfrozen. One of Millions.

but… creamy garlic sauce… on an ipad… with waitstaff…

Building your burger around the quarter pounder patty is like building your house over a fresh sinkhole.

do they not still have angus burgers or whatever, why not glop some aioli on those

angus was phased out and all the premium offerings involve the quarter pounder platform

http://ww4.sinaimg.cn/large/7410164egw1eab2yumbjgj20ng0j4ac8.jpg

Help me out, is that pork belly?

is that a character with flames normally on top of it or did they add that in on top of a more basic platform

No it's chicken thighs xp

That's the character for spicy

It doesn't normally have a flame on top

辣

Here is the character for fire

火

Here is the character for fire depicted as four dots boiling something (I like to think of it as a cauldron)

煮

do they not still have angus burgers or whatever, why not glop some aioli on those

― j., Friday, November 15, 2013 12:15 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

put a donk on it

I think you guys would be interested in the new spicy pork mcbites

http://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/2013/11/14/fast-food-watch-mcdonalds-debuts-pork-mcnuggets-china

http://i.imgur.com/hrAvqyH.jpg

I think you guys would be interested in the new spicy pork mcbites

http://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/2013/11/14/fast-food-watch-mcdonalds-debuts-pork-mcnuggets-china

http://i.imgur.com/hrAvqyH.jpg

New Spicy pork mcbites

So good I post it twice

"Because we discovered you can blast more meat off of the seemingly stripped clean bones of a pig than we had previously thought."

i want flames to put on english spicies

ugh yeah when you realize all these "bites" are mechanically separated meat they get a lot less appealing.

machines mince meat efficiently

so you are not separated from the flavor

that is injected back into the reconstituted wads

http://i.imgur.com/GQ762lU.jpg

Really excited for this. Can't wait to go to my local Olive Garden's and give it a test drive!

slipshod build

https://www.technomic.com/Pressroom/Releases/dynRelease_Detail.php?rUID=262

7. Every daypart is a snack daypart: As the snacking lifestyle goes mainstream, diners are paradoxically less interested in snack menus per se. Millennials see dollar and dollar-plus menus as the snack menu. LSRs are paying more attention to snack-size handhelds and car-friendly packaging; they're also stepping up their game with grab-and-go or market-style offerings. As FSR customers move away from meat-and-potatoes meals, operators are catering to the snacking-and-sharing ethos with pairings, trios and flights from all parts of the menu—from soup trios to beer samplers to retro popsicle-flight desserts.

Starches are staging a comeback—from ramen to buckwheat noodles to pasta made with unusual ingredients. Rice bowls (and jasmine rice, basmati rice, brown rice) will be big, in part because of continued fascination with Asian fare and in part because of an association with healthfulness.

Waffles as a base or side make traditional savory items like chicken seem edgy.

7. Every daypart is a snack daypart

gospel

As the snacking lifestyle goes mainstream

keep snacking weird

Every daypart is a snack daypart

Win yourself a cheap traypart

Share some greased tea with me

good daypart to you

shall we grab-and-go a snack-sized handheld?

There's no separate beverage industry thread I assume?

http://adage.com/article/news/pepsico-coca-cola-creating-cola-future/245457/

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ba1OrDsIQAEeAbw.jpg:large

Holy shir

seriously jealous of NYers right now, you always get all the good food

Yeah just read up on it, only available at the NYC whopper bar

Do you think they sell by the slice

Glad to see that sometime between conception and execution they got rid of their usual wilted-ass, poorly chopped lettuce. I assume it's still slathered in expired, hot mayonnaise though.

guys my neighborhood pizzeria had not one but two pizza-restaurateur trade mags sitting out when i went there last nite

http://i.imgur.com/UseGGqr.jpg

i read Pizza Today for a while, it is so awesome:

http://i.imgur.com/4sNtszz.jpg

http://www.pizzatoday.com/
http://www.pmq.com/

http://thepizzainsider.pmq.com/2013/12/make-your-own-pretzel-crust-pizza.html

omg

http://www.burgerbusiness.com/?p=16269

Agree

Had a pretzel bacon cheeseburger a few months ago and it was awesome

Wendy's has the best fries of any fast food place besides Arby's, maybe, also

And also agree with BK Fry Burger as worst burger idea of 2013

Needed at least three times as many fries

Plus BK has absolutely the worst fries of any fast food joint

i assume you are not talking about satisfries, which are extremely satisfrying.

Man I've never had satisfries

But in general Burger King's surface to potato ratio is out of alignment

It's closer to a steak fry or potato wedge than a shoe string

Feel bad for BK, they're clearly in decline

Which is too bad because the Whopper is a quality burger

And I love their innovation

But it could be the end

BurgerBusiness.com doesn’t do taste tastes or reviews so this choice doesn’t reflect an opinion about how good the burger may have been.

Glad that they're reaffirming their commitment to being a nonpartisan publication. Rare to see these days in this overcharged media backbiting atmosphere of contemporary American politics.

you will prob not be satisfried if you are a shoe string fundamentalist

That sounds like heathen talk

http://i.imgur.com/A8BT3He.jpg

Amazing innovation here

http://www.cookdoor.com.eg/menu.aspx?groupid=6&groupdesc=SEA%20FOODS

Grilled viagra?!

this whole thread is wonderful

http://www.qsrmagazine.com/reports/2013-year-review?page=2

Perhaps no item captured the public’s attention this year quite like the pretzel bun. These salty-sweet rolls have been carriers at some regional and casual eateries for years, but the Pretzel Bacon Cheeseburger at Wendy’s this summer pushed them into quick service in a major way.

“We were able to discover an artisan bakery that could produce a great product and still supply 6,200 restaurants,” Lynch says, noting that the brand first succeeded with flatbread offerings. “We tested [the Pretzel Bacon Cheeseburger] in three markets in January, and people began talking about it on social media.”

Sonic followed suit by adding hot dogs on pretzel buns, dubbed Pretzel Dogs. Wendy’s went on to put chicken on its bun, and Dunkin’ Donuts rolled out its Pretzel Roll Roast Beef Sandwich.

“The pretzel bun and other creative bread carriers are an offshoot of the artisnal trend that has been growing,” says Mary Chapman, director of product innovation for Chicago-based restaurant research and consulting firm Technomic. “People are interested in trying different types of breads, and these pretzel buns have a great taste and texture.”

2013: year of the bun

The bun can be an overrated part of the build

But you definitely can't skimp