$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

can i pay my rent with this?

http://www.geocities.com/zoidberg_fan/episodes/images/fry_coffee.gif

iPhone dude iPhone

I IS A PATRIOT!

I'm a put a down payment on a condo

an eightball and a cheap escort!!

^lol economy u get none

i'm gonna make things right between a friend and me, and replace the musical instrument i broke

a half ounce and a very cheap escort

i did my dude wrong

are you getting married or what

http://m.assetbar.com/achewood/autaux?b=M%5ea11f09b8576e606bcb5038dfdb92fb821&u=http%3A%2F%2Fachewood.com%2Fcomic.php%3Fdate%3D07182007

just to go ahead and get it out of the way. sorry gbx

:(

you owe me

check's in the mail bro

My wife gave her first graders the writing assignment "If I Had A Hundred Dollars" yesterday. Answers included:

"Hot chocolate, an airplane and a helicopter"

"PSP, a house, a dog, a cat, a fish"

"My mom and dad"

"A hot dog"

POLL

oh dear

first graders OTM

i'm def buying 6 hot dogs w/ my check!!!

i'm gonna stock up on parents

maybe she meant like ransom them or something

i took it as more like her parents would say "hand over the hundred bucks kiddo, we got bills"

seriously, cashing it and using it for booze fund

cuz you know america number one and whatever

gonna give 300 kids two dollars

^lost blink 182 video

ok if you did that gbx that would in fact be totally awesome

yeah serious answer is she probably meant helping her parents who are definitely poor. Which is unbelievably cute and sad and sweet.

im not going to do it because fuck little kids daddy needs boooooooze xpost

blog it or it didn't happen

gbxpost

A MILLION DOLLARS!!???!?!?!?!?!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=fdqAbnGs-fw

300 hot dogs

you know, like tina fey.

http://www.schadenfreude.net/upload/2007/11/familyGuy_Meg_single1_72.jpg

I'm gonna pretend that you're the New York Knicks.

All for me, sorry, no awesome children handouts. I'm thinking clothing free-for all, maybe starting with Filene's Basement for maximum bang/buck ratio. Save enough for a mad high-dollar steak and baked potato dinner for two. Or maybe just one, too keep with the "all for me" spirit.

FUCK YOU, I GOT SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS! I GOT A MANDATE!

all I can think of looking at this thread is the part in Glengarry Glen Ross where Pacino goes "you just cost me six thousand dollars. SIX! THOUSAND! DOLLARS!"

as a side note, is it really possible that no one in the world has made the obligatory "I got your economic stimulus package right here!" crotch grab joke, or am i just watching all the wrong television networks these days.

. ?

No wait, changed my mind. I'll still do dinner if I can, but I could really use a good wool suit. Just one is all I need, long as it's charcoal and comes with two pair of pants.

This is so 2001.

do they still sell indulgences?

maybe I should use this as an excuse to try per se

Is the Crunchwrap Supreme an indulgence?

that's a penance moreliek

lol i'm lutheran

Wait, is this refund for the first or second inherited recession?

I sell indulgences. So to speak.

OK, hookers and blow--that's an indulgence, right?

absolutionly

kenan you use your $600 as a bribe for a libble invite

I pooh-pooh your childish libble invite. I have discovered stmusic.

(No, actually, I'd still kinda like a libble invite, or whatever else you got.)

i actually use stmusic. i'm glad to see that its library is gradually growing. i got an invite from a friend (lol panicking oink refugees) right after oink went under and it's gotten better recently.

jhoshea extols the virtues of what.cd but i haven't been able to wrangle an invite

pay off my cc

lol at this thread turning into "i will use my $600 to bargain for a means to illegally download mp3's"

i was lazy zinging kenan for earnestly filling out the form on the libble invite thread

http://www.helloinfo.hu/img/upload/200512/film_sorozatdvd_thewires2_ziggy.jpg

whiskey drinking duck is but a tragic dream

QP

OK TOMBOT's Fry coffee gif wins so far.

oh that duck :-/

I felt so bad for that duck, man!

Wait, is this US money? Did Bush give you this? Is it STAINED WITH BLOOD??

no, it's not US money, it's dollars that we're borrowing from China.

honestly with the way the dollar looks right now you're honestly better off spending this now and not saving since no investment you're likely to be able to make is going to match the $$ equivalent next april 15

in fact that $600 is already depreciating at a terrifying rate and nobody even has their grubby paws on it yet. I can't wait to see what the sales flyers look like two sundays from now

keytar, cheesesteak, drugs.

hmm. this will either go to student loans, or maybe finally get me a thunderbird bass.

Or a new video card so's I can play finally play "Bioshock" and "Witcher".

yeah, dealers should be getting very excited about this. hundreds of suddenly liquid customers popping out of the woodwork all at once demanding your product! basic microeconomics and the government working together for YOU

anybody who uses this to pay down debts is a terrorist btw

mutek

lol spend it in canada

i'm probably spending mine in japan

incidentally us$600 in australia would buy you a plastic fork

can give u tokyo lowdown if desired xpost

http://elainemeinelsupkis.typepad.com/money_matters/images/dollar_down_against_euro_up_against_yen.jpg

?

i'm gonna spend it in canada (thereby stimulating the economy north of the border instead of our), smuggle the stuff back into the states (avoiding paying duty on it, natch), then sell said items at a reasonable markup (and not charging sales tax or reporting the income).

THANKS FOR THE HANDOUT GWB!!!

damn chi kev you have got it all planned out.

Can someone explain to non-American why you're all getting 600 dollars?

because our government loves us very much and wants us to be happy

x-post

To make up for the fact that we are on our way to becoming a second-world country (at least).

Also I'm not sure what I'll spend mine on. Perhaps a nice pair of shoes or laser hair removal. Or a trunk full of subwoofers.

So the American government is giving everyone 600 $? In cash?

What's the story behind it?

Economy's in the toilet. Bush Administration figures if they give everyone $600, we'll all run out and spend it right away, thereby stimulating the economy.

this thread is google result #2 for "six hundred dollars"

Bush Administration figures if they give everyone $600, we'll all run out and spend it right away, thereby stimulating the economy.

Is this a great country, or what?

all caps + dollar signs = top of google search results

damn chi kev you have got it all planned out.

-- gr8080, Thursday, February 14, 2008 1:12 PM (Thursday, February 14, 2008 1:12 PM) Bookmark Link

truthfully i'm probably just gonna spend it on burritos from picante.

talk about an investment that'll get you returns

WHOOO AH!

tuomas, it is part of a very stupid plan to further delay a long-foreshadowed recession, despite the fact that said recession has already begun and will not blink twice in the face of a bunch of people spending $600 that we would normally have just paid to government in the form of income tax a year from now (and probably still will anyway).

part of a very, very stupid plan

Fixed.

yeah, doesn't this just mean smaller returns next year?

slot cars

oh man slot cars is a fucking great idea

http://www.slotcarillustrated.com/v-web/gallery/d/68265-5/Day+1+Nurnberg+140.jpg

Economy's in the toilet. Bush Mugabe Administration figures if they give everyone $600, we'll all run out and spend it right away, thereby stimulating the economy.

-- jaymc, Friday, 15 February 2008 06:27 (29 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

it's not the bush admin, it's congress too! oh wait same fuckin' diff

I AM GOING TO STIMULATE IT BABY

woah i should buy a drum set if i get all six hundred dollars but i'm married so maybe i get more

for those of us who aren't american

The stimulus law signed by President Bush on Wednesday provides what he called a "booster shot" to the economy, but the medicine might not be strong enough to ward off a recession.

The $168 billion package of personal tax rebates and business tax cuts will likely help shore up consumer spending later this year, economists say. That could minimize the pain of a possible downturn.

So they're all getting FREE MONEY in order to avoid, er, an economic downturn. Wait.

THANK YOU AMERICAS

http://www.usd.edu/smm/Drums/LudwigJrDrumsetlarge.jpg

as a guy who owns a store that sells luxury items that nobody needs to stupid people with almost no financial sense, i heartily approve of this stimulus package

do i need 14 toms, and 2 bass drums y/n?

I'm amazed you don't break away from the crazy fundamentalist states and call yourself the Republic of Funkynesia or something.

ha, you do, but not for $600.

i'm thinking of getting a nice crash cymbal, a cowbell + bass drum mount, and an extra cymbal stand. all the little things i've been missing from my jazz/new orleans kit.

No, I mean in order to avoid being ruled by someone considerably less sociopathic.

the problem is, AA, that THEY ARE EVERYWHERE

But that's $168 billion less bullets to steal oilprotect innocent countries from evil terrists!

woah i should buy a drum set if i get all six hundred dollars but i'm married so maybe i get more

You will get $1200 but surely your wife gets a say in how half of that is spent.

$1196 drum set + $4 ear plugs = 1 happy couple!

ok lolol @ que

no, it's 168 billion less to spend on sustainable energy research, space programs, or basically any type of science you'd care to name. the war department will always have plenty of cash.

dude, science is for nerrrrrrrrrrds

war protects us from people who hate freedom and stuff

i will probably be buying an external hard drive, then paying off part of my car.

BIG HOOS aka the terroristsympathizer

have you ever thought about taking up the highly rewarding hobby of playing the guitar?

ok lolol @ que

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Thursday, February 14, 2008 2:26 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

yes

Pay down debt! Woo! Woo!

I want a Wii though. :(

woah i should buy a drum set if i get all six hundred dollars but i'm married so maybe i get more

Wait are you thinking you get to spend MY half? 'Cause I'm thinking NUH UH. Wifey needs a new pair of SHOES!

have you ever thought about taking up the highly rewarding hobby of playing the guitar?

-- John Justen, Thursday, February 14, 2008 8:32 PM

Mr. Que & the Steendrivers

seriously where is this money

you have to wait in line at the white house to get it, tom

that's what all those people are doing

seriously where is this money

^^ actually terrifying political/existential question

actually terrifying political/existentialtotally valid question that no one is asking

It'll almost pay for 2 months of healthcare! Awesome.

Thought shit wasn't coming til like May?

national buy an iphone rebate

yeah, doesn't this just mean smaller returns next year?

-- Jordan, Thursday, February 14, 2008 2:35 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Link

until someone can answer this question in plain english, we're not spending a damn cent. MSNBC has had about Q&A articles about this so far and whenever someone asks "uh, hey, will this be coming out of next year's rebate?" they answer with a complete non-answer, like "YOU'LL BE GETTING $600!!!!" i guess they don't want to spook people out of spending that FREE MUNNEH.

(if it doesn't come out of next year's rebate i'm getting a midi controller with lots of knobs and new glasses. also plastic pocket protector.)

What if you owe back taxes and/or rarely actually file, do you still get this money, I'm asking for a friend.

this rebate does not consider such logistics because HEY LOOK FREE MONEY CAPITALIST DUMBOS

now that's what I'm talkin about

this shit is just going to go straight to citibank's student loans division, i don't see what the big deal is.

Hmm, maybe i should divert some of it towards finally picking up that Thunderbird I've been looking at, since I need to upgrade from my shitty entry-level p-bass clone.

look am i going to get this money if i am a tax paying non-conditional permanent resident but not yet a citizen? does my kid get it too?

The last time they did this, you had to have paid taxes, filed a tax return, and it got added to your income for the next year's return. I may as well just send it back to them in a quarterly payment.

woo..thats me! thanks!

I banked this year with my tax refund: TWO six hundos! I'm going to spend it on rent somewhere for the summer.

I got shit for my federal refund this year and will (hopefully, maybe) be out of the country when my six hundred dollar comes. :(

anybody got theirs yet?

i should really do my taxes.

^^^

I thought the first ones were being sent in May?

Research has shown that most people are going to save that $600 or use it to pay off debts instead of buying something new and magically reviving the economy, so maybe it's not going to happen :-/

oh man my fuckin' philip j fry jpg went bye bye

Payments start on May 2: http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=177937,00.html

anybody who uses this to pay down debts is a terrorist btw

Infidel credit card company FUBAR'd my scheduled monthly online payment, and since I was "late", they bumped up my interest rate FOURTEEN FUCKING PERCENT. So instead of an iPod touch or guitar lessons or a DVD splurge or donating to the greater Hartford drug trade, it's a CAPITAL ONE JIHAD (w/ extra Lynndie-flavored comeuppance to boot).

Or maybe I'll just put that $$$ in my savings account and let that 1.25% interest roll up all nice and fat mmmmmmmm.

dude your bank fucking sucks. why do people stick with shitty, shitty banks?!?

uhm let me guess BANK OF AMERICA?

oh capital one.
you said it in your post.
boa has been doing that too.

I'm going to eat a steak as big as my arm and break the remaining $550 into ones on which I will sleep for 36 hours.

Nah, Capital One credit card (one of 284848482392 I have in my possession because I R AMERICAN), but NewAlliance Bank who bought out my most favorite Bank (Savings Bank of Manchester) a couple years ago, and is just as shitty as BOA, except not as conveniently located. Seriously, tho, how do I shot bank that doesn't want to fuck me rotten.

mine will be automatically applied to my back tax debt. whoopee.

Maybe we should have a thread on american banking options that don't suck a caribou's ass

Hopefully to help pay for our honeymoon.

BTW, if any spambots are lurking, hit me up backchannel and I'll gladly send you account info, balance, SSN, favorite GoBot, whatever.

american banking options that don't suck a caribou's ass

I'm convinced such options do not exist. My back, National Shitty, just started capping the number of debit card transactions I can use per month. Like a fifteen dollar fee if I use my debit card more than ten times a month. WTF?

What Tombot said.

Maybe we should have a thread on american banking options that don't suck a caribou's ass

All banks everywhere suck a caribou's ass. So far this year I have been fucked by a division of Citi and RBS, I am changing bank (probably to another bit of Citi) so I can get fucked by them.

my bank, TCF, seems all right. except one of their execs is one of the powerline guys :/

I'm convinced such options do not exist. My back, National Shitty, just started capping the number of debit card transactions I can use per month. Like a fifteen dollar fee if I use my debit card more than ten times a month. WTF?

wow this is exceptional cuntfuckery

indeed, wtf.

i like my credit union.

Anyone have any views on Citi? They have an account that will make moving to the US easier, but that move is speculation right now. Are they going to make my mouth taste like digested caribou chow?

hsbc seems ok?

My credit union doesn't hose me too badly on most things, but they did recently start charging me withdrawal fees when I use my debit card.

I just paid off and closed an hsbc credit card due to them jacking the interest up to 30% for payment being 1 day late.

Oh, see also: Chase. Refused to take my ex-husband's name off the account, massive interest rate, and totally piss-poor customer service. Buh-bye, you bastards.

No problems with BoS here. Nothing but helpful.

Yeah, my fiancee has Chase and has had huuuuge problems with their exceptionally horrid customer service.

Would you dingos take this bank shop talk to the proper thread, plz?

A Thread on American Banking Options That Don't Suck a Caribou's Ass

(jon/via/ chi 2.0, congrats!)

Thanks!

WaMu is pretty good.

xp...

Chase tried to come after me for almost $1grand in supposed overdue credit card balances + shit tons of fees etc. Thing is I never had a credit card with Chase. When I called them on it and gave them my soc# it turns out it was a different W1ll14m C0l3m4n entirely! Not even a middle initial N - and my account is under my middle fucking name.

you real name is not nick?

oh wait duh

111
333

http://img175.imageshack.us/img175/8263/smrtfd6.jpg

btw the faq says this won't have any effect on your 2008 rebate/amount owed

fuck a relief refund ... i made too much to get any! just like in 2001, when i made too little ;_;

i can REALLY say that dubya hasn't given me shit.

A+ punchline on that first post, sleep.

http://tinyurl.com/24nuw4

that dude is funny. "Coooool and comfortable."

Kai Ryssdal has the dbaggiest name ever, but his voice makes him sound like a (grating) bro!

I thought it was decided that the dbaggiest name ever was Nozzle McPussywash.

Bush says rebates going out Monday will boost economy

WASHINGTON - President Bush said tax rebates will start going out Monday, earlier than previously announced, and should help Americans cope with rising gasoline and food prices, as well as aid a slumping economy.

Democrats said they were glad the rebate checks were about to go out, but suggested that multinational oil companies were not among the businesses the stimulus package was originally designed to help.

"Starting Monday, the effects of the stimulus will begin to reach millions of households across our country," Bush said Friday in remarks on the South Lawn of the White House.

Those first rebates will be directly deposited into people's bank accounts. The Internal Revenue Service had been saying direct deposits wouldn't start until next Friday. Bush said paper checks would begin going out on May 9, a week earlier than previously announced.

"The money is going to help Americans offset the high prices we're seeing at the gas pump, the grocery store, and also give our economy a boost to help us pull out of this economic slowdown," Bush said.

Bush's emphasis on fuel and food prices differed from other comments he's made since signing the economic stimulus legislation, intended to aid the economy by boosting overall consumer spending — which accounts for roughly two-thirds of the nation's economic activity.

Bush has suggested the rebates could trigger a spending spree. "When the money reaches the American people, we expect they will use it to boost consumer spending," he said last month.

By saying expressly that people could use these one-time checks to pay for such necessities as food and gas, Bush underscored the deepening challenges facing the economy.

Democrats were quick to pick up on the change of focus.

"It's galling to think that taxpayers' stimulus checks will be lining the pockets of OPEC. The sad truth is that the average American family will spend almost their entire stimulus check on higher gas prices this year," said Sen. Charles Schumer, D-N.Y., chairman of the Joint Economic Committee of Congress.

OPEC is the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries.

"Unless the administration gets OPEC to increase oil supply, American consumers are going to be in for a scorching summer of $4 gasoline with no relief in sight," Schumer said.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif., agreed that people "need this rebate to cope with the rising cost of gas and groceries." She said that, while the rebates would help to get the economy moving, there was a need for a second stimulus package "and we have begun some conversation with the administration and Republicans."

As he had earlier in the week, Bush used the word "slowdown" to describe the state of the economy. He has denied that the nation is in a recession, although many economists say it is.

"It's obvious our economy is in a slowdown. But, fortunately, we recognized the signs early and took action," Bush said.

The rebates — up to $600 for an individual, $1,200 for a couple and an additional $300 for each dependent child — are the centerpiece of the government's $168 billion stimulus package, enacted in February. Roughly 130 million households are expected to get them.

Bush made the comments before boarding his helicopter at the start of a day trip to Connecticut.

People must file a tax return for their 2007 income to be eligible for a rebate check.

The IRS now says all checks for those who filed tax returns on time are scheduled to be deposited or mailed by July 11.

The economy — burdened by the collapse of home prices, a financial and credit crisis, and now rising energy and food prices — grew at an anemic 0.6 percent in the final three months of last year and is believed to have gotten even weaker in the first three months of this year.

The government will report on the first quarter's performance next week.

With the economy faltering, the nation's unemployment rate has climbed to 5.1 percent, the highest since September 2005, when it suffered from the devastating blows of the Gulf Coast hurricanes. Job losses in the first three months of this year neared the quarter-million mark.

Foreclosures have surged to record highs and financial companies have taken multibillion losses on mortgage investments that soured. The situation has sent a tremor through Wall Street and has sent the administration, Congress and presidential contenders looking for ways to provide relief.

schumer you moron

paying for gas lines the pockets of companies that sell gas, not fucking opec nations, oh wait, opec = terrorists, gas companies = fortune 20

http://www.big-money-marketing.net/images/chris-cash-cars.jpg

lol spammers

"When the money reaches the American people, we expect they will use it to boost consumer spending"

whoa how did he know i was planning to use my $600 to boost consumer spending? mindreader

i am going to bury my $600 in the woods and wait for it to decrease even further in value.

My $300 will almost replace what I actually paid in taxes lol.

god I hope I don't get audited

it will go towards my massive credit card bill from getting my car fixed or possible future dental work

^^^bingo

does anyone know how the delivery dates of the rebate checks are determined w/r/t when i'm gonna get my $$$$$$$$$~~6large~~$$$$$$$$$$$

100 is large to me btw : D

Check this: http://www.irs.gov/irs/article/0,,id=180250,00.html

When you get it depends on the last 2 digits of your ssn and whether you go went for direct deposit on your last refund.

ayo may 9, hurry the fuk up

yeah !! in time for my birthday

so whats this "up to" six hundred dollars??? how little do you have to make to qualify for the maximum?

There's a calculator link on that schedule page, gr8080.

Yeah, I'm wondering that too. I'm hoping for 600 and I'm probably going to get 60 or something.

How much does XBOX 360+GTAIV cost? That's all I want, I swear. My rebate check is going to line the corporate videogame fatcats.

My rebate check is going into my savings account, where it belongs.

According to that calculator, I'm getting $300. Thanks U.S. government. Now I have to get the 20GB hard drive instead of the 80GB. I thought you were cool, Uncle Sam.

Fuck a July 11th.

lol sense of entitlement

TRY GETTING A JOB KIDDOES

I HAVE A JOB BUT IT COSTS ME $10 IN GAS EVERY TIME I HAVE TO GET THERE

ALSO I WANT RECORDS AND VACATIONS AND NEW CLOTHES

ya rly telecommuting plz

I'm so glad I don't ride the subway at rush hour, I don't even want to know what it looks like now that it costs $70 to fill up

My tongue has been planted firmly in cheek for the past 20 minutes, but I don't know the proper emoticon. Thanks for that, Uncle Sam.

no way i'd kill myself so fast if i worked from home.

who are you gonna hand out cookies too over the phone HOOS?

hanging up on racists not as fun as kicking them out. :(

xxp

No you were serious and you deserve belittlement

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/126/318542190_479a442275.jpg

lol suckers:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/194/527389010_f171dcd437_o.jpg

</braggin>

52 through 63 June 20

WHAT THE SHIT i'ma be suckin down instant coffee while yall fuckin around with ya 20gb hard drives

Nah, I'll be drinking Nestea too, I don't get mine until a week before you.

I mean NESCAFE. Nestea if for people with 80gb hard drives.

Tom, how will you have a missed connection without riding the subway at rush hour?

According to that calculator, I'm getting $300. Thanks U.S. government. Now I have to get the 20GB hard drive instead of the 80GB. I thought you were cool, Uncle Sam.

-- Z S, Saturday, 26 April 2008 00:06 (1 hour ago) Link

wtf kind of 80gb coffee-making weather detecting hard drive are you buying that costs $600??

ebay, dude. ebay.

what

<i>a half ounce and a very cheap escort</i>

If the commentators on the Eliot Spitzer case are correct, what would cost at least $1000 in NYC can be had in DC for $200 or $250.

I might make an Ikea run. But gosh I'm so enthusiastic about the idea.

I'm so enthusiastic about the idea.

The gov just put it on your tab.

wtf kind of 80gb coffee-making weather detecting hard drive are you buying that costs $600??

Maybe SSD?

hit newegg.com, dude, where you get the best stuff. i just got me a little card thing lets my pda-phoney-whatsit get on the innernet n' not cost me nuthin'

GOT MINE

probably going to spend it on a plane ticket next week, sadly not one to tokyo

DAER GOVERNMENT,

WHERE MY MONEY BITCH?

check your ss# date?

i think mine's coming on the 9th.

9th at the latest, but I hoped it would arrive early.

and the longer it takes, the more paranoid I get that they're looking over my returns

shit doesn't even get sent for another month

hi where is mine

Where is it? I have a low number and everything! GIMME!

lol I don't get $600

how does your social tell you?

The lower the last two digits, the sooner you get MONEYZ.

Bought wireless headphones.

They sound like shit and I'm bringing them back.

THANKS GOVERNMENT

Stimulus Payment Schedule for Tax Returns Processed by April 15

Do not buy wireless audio equipment at all, ever. It's goddamn hard enough to make wired audio equipment sound good.

i think im only getting $300 since my gross income was so low..... :(

going to be so pissed if i only get 300

You only have to break $12k or something to get the full $600.

Z_S if you have a ps3 i will swap xbox360 plus unopened GTAIV for it.

imagine being able to afford records and clothes and vacations. wows.

WOOOO SIX BILLS IN MY CHEKCING ACCT!!!!!!!!!!!
BUYING ALL THIS BEERS & BURRITOS 2NIGHT

you are a great american.

I got a check today. Now I can pay for 2 months of healthcare.

I also got a Jury Duty notice. Coincidence?

need for deposit for new fucking apartment

got

bought a ticket to shanghai. haha i gave my money not to an american airline but China Eastern

If I had them withdraw the money I owed, will I get DD

My bank is processing the deposit. And I was thinking of getting a DVD recorder (not TIVO). Does anyone have any recommendations?

what SS# are they up to?

I got mine today and I'm 24! Friends with much higher numbers got their's a week ago. I think it's bullshit.

I'm using my money to move to Canada.

i thought the SSN thing was only if you were getting a paper check?

DIRECT DEPOSIT

Last two SSN digits: Payments will be transmitted no later than:
00 through 20 May 2
21 through 75 May 9
76 through 99 May 16

MY GOVERNMENT LIES

i paid $600 to my credit card. hope it helps out that mortgage mess, dudes.

i might spend my $600 on taliban-sourced afghan heroin just to spite the US govt. i might also spend it on pizza. either way i bet i turn up to work on Monday with crusty vomit stains on my jeans.

you have by the end of the day, IRS. get depositin'

then fuck, i need to check ye olde bank ledger.

NOT THERE YET.

i have checked every day for the last two weeks!

oooh between the 600 and finally getting my perkins check the other day (yes, 1 week before semester end!) i am rolling! but now i will pay rent and bills and be poor again.

hahahaha my wife told me yesterday we weren't getting ours until August, which is BS I just checked the website, we should have by next week

a) she was fucking with me
b) she already has the money and is leaving me
c) she just got confused
d) ???

Definitely b), and she probably bought the drums you wanted just to spite you.

upon learning that this money should be hitting my bank account i immediately went to ebay and started pricing guitars i don't need.

that's what bushie is counting on you to do.

i dont think i got mine yet
i did get my ny state refund yesterday though

Maybe I should put my imaginary $600 towards an imaginary down payment on the half-million dollar studio condo I'll never be able to afford. THE AMERICAN DREAM RITE!

that's what bushie is counting on you to do.

yeah i know. but it still seems better than my original plan of stimulating the economy a half gram at a time.

i just gave 500 of it to my credit card company. OOOH YEAH

i don't like the silver hardware but i like the black on black pickguard and i really regret selling my jaguar.

http://i3.ebayimg.com/01/i/000/ee/9f/1f56_1.JPG

I got my money and bought a ticket to Seatlle.

fuck it, i'm blowing it on pizza.

i'm spending mine on GASOLINE

1200! Another great reason to be married (and vote Republican!). And not even be an American!

definitely hide it from your spouse like mrs. que did.

spending it on gas will ensure it reaches terrorist countires more quickly than my heroin plan. and yet it's me that'd be breaking the law. go figure.

xpost bell labs booooooooooo^^^^^

I'm spending mine on a fez monkey and a set of crayons.

i'm spending mine on GASOLINE

Probably a more sound investment than anything else out there.

whree the fuck is my money

i might spend my $600 on taliban-sourced afghan heroin just to spite the US govt.

When the Bush regime paid out that $300 stimulus years ago, at least one person drew up a list of deserving charities standing in opposition to the Prez's agenda. Has anyone done anything like that this time around?

i want a guitar too... probably an awful idea but i WANT one!

mine will go to tax debt.

yaaaaay.

haha I have a coworker whose $7000 refund AND his $2400 stimulus is all going right back into the IRS to pay off 2006

I didn't make enough last year to get the $$$. I am incredible.

Mine should be here by now, right? My and the wife's SS numbers are passed by now, and we got direct deposit last time we got a refund - and paid this year by direct deduction. I have no idea where my loot is.

fuck it, i'm getting a 360 and gta4.

CMON I FILED MY TAXES IN LIKE FEBRUARY WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUU

ch-ching!!!!!

i bought a couple used rap cds. thats it so far.

hey, that thing still going on tomorrow night?

yes

fuck

hey, that thing still going on tomorrow night?

-- chicago kevin, Friday, May 9, 2008 4:17 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

yes

-- deej, Friday, May 9, 2008 4:20 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

but dont arrive between 1030 and midnight. before or after is fine. theres always a line now on saturdays

fuck a line!

Got mine today, into online savings it goes

I should probably get around to filing my taxes.

42" LCD

North Korea

1200! Another great reason to be married (and vote Republican!). And not even be an American!

-- admrl, Friday, May 9, 2008 1:36 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark Link

YEAH except add another $300 for baby. woo!

bought tickets for ATL/CHI trip in june/july.

bought an eeePC

didn't even really need one, but the "want" has stayed steady as the bank account has waxed and waned, so i figured it was a legit non-impulse buy.

ATLxor brodown imminent

Cali refund + fed refund - amt owed on last year's late filing = $6K all in joint acct for furniture & groceries prob. No $600 rebate tho.

digital slr, thank you very much.

come onnnnnnnnnnn, iRS

yeah seriously! my cc payment was due today and i kind of just assumed i would have it by now so i paid too much.

My tax guy didn't have my back. I wasn't getting a refund this year, and he didn't ask my banking details for the $600 to be direct deposited, so I have to wait for the check next month. I had about five other reasons to start looking for a new tax guy anyway.

If filing or preparation fees were deducted from your 2007 Refund or you received a rapid refund, you will be receiving a check instead of a direct deposit. Please see the Paper Check section of the Payment Schedule.

would this apply if you filed through turbotax or something? they didn't deduct fees from my refund, i just used them to free efile...

this is so frustrating, i keep getting this message from https://sa2.www4.irs.gov/irfof/IRServlet?app=IRACTC

We are sorry. Specific information about your Stimulus Payment is not available.
Possible reasons include:

* Your payment may still be coming, but has not yet been sent. Information will be available here as payments are sent based on the last two digits of the primary SSN shown on your 2007 tax return. Specific information about your Stimulus Payment will not be available until about one week before your payment is scheduled to be sent. See the complete Payment Schedule below for more information.

* Filing and/or preparation fees were deducted from your refund or you received a rapid refund from your preparer. You will be receiving a check instead of a direct deposit. Please see the Paper Check Payment Schedule below.

* You did not file a tax return for 2007 or your return is still being processed. Additional information about filing requirements is available.

* The information entered did not match our records. Be sure to check the information you entered. You may Re-Enter your information as necessary.

Remember, to qualify for the Stimulus Payment, you must meet the eligibility requirements. Please allow 6 weeks after filing your tax return before checking on the status of your Stimulus Payment.

Please note, our phone representatives will not have more information about your payment than is shown on this website.

Carbondale, IL here I come.

My Bloody Valentine + Amtrak to Chicago

mine will apparently be arriving on the 4th of july. america. a place for americans.

purple mountains

srsly what the fuck does that even mean

fuck because i filed through turbotax they are mailing the check and not direct depositing it. which means it will probably never show up at my house since the mail dude likes to not deliver my mail for weeks at a time and about half of the stuff i am supposed to get in the mail gets lost (still never seen grandma's birthday card or my dental insurance card! yes i have complained about this a lot) whatta country.

same thing happened to me. in fact, my efile through turbotax screwed up my direct deposits for some reason for my returns (bank rejected them, don't know why). new check ain't coming until midsummer. i am so broke!

the weird thing is that my efile was free so nothing was deducted out of the amount. this makes no sense:
Filing and/or preparation fees were deducted from your refund or you received a rapid refund from your preparer. You will be receiving a check instead of a direct deposit. Please see the Paper Check Payment Schedule below.

the state file was like $30 or something but i paid it with my credit card? so what the fuck irs.

That's weird Bell - I efiled w/ Turbotax (cost me like $15 I think, I do business taxes and stuff) and mine's supposed to be deposited today.

And lo, there it is - in an account I was supposed to close out a few months ago due to identity theft issues. Yay for procrastination.

weird! i don't know what is going on then, i just assumed that was the problem since from the laundry list of reasons it seemed the most likely. OF COURSE i can't get any actual explanation.

did you call the 800 number?

no the
Please note, our phone representatives will not have more information about your payment than is shown on this website.

deterred me from trying to call them.

oh, my message was different - it actually suggested calling. i didn't read the entire list of points in the message you quoted.

fuck because i filed through turbotax they are mailing the check and not direct depositing it. which means it will probably never show up at my house since the mail dude likes to not deliver my mail for weeks at a time

strange that we live a thousand miles from each other yet seem to have the same mail carrier.

I thought it was also interesting that we are supposed to save the form that tells how much we get "as you will need it for your 2008 tax return".

it sucks! i didn't receive any mail at all for over a week and spent hours trying to get ahold of someone at the post office. it turns out the mailman "misplaced" our key. right.

it turns out the mailman "misplaced" our key. right.

we don't even have a key! all the mail for the three apartments just gets shoved in a mail slot. unless it's too big (like say, a 7" mailer or an lp) in which case he just leaves it on the steps where it's usually stolen.

also, we don't get mail delivery on saturdays.

i had my piano tuned and had some minor maintenance performed on it.

it sounds so great now!

haha http://www.howispentmystimulus.com/

“I used my $600 to bail myself out of prison, along with $6900 more.”

Nick, 28, Welder
Ephrata, PA

I got A LETTER yesterday saying my check is coming by FRIDAY. How efficient.

I bought a guitar amp with my tax refund, no idea what I'm gonna do with this six hundo yet. :\

i'm pretty sure i'm never getting my money ;_;

if you really think that it's been sent, report it stolen. the irs sucks, but they'll do something about it. al had to do that with his tax return this year.

I got A LETTER yesterday saying my check is coming by FRIDAY. How efficient.

-- Dr Morbius, Wednesday, May 28, 2008 12:41 PM (33 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Yeh, I got one yesterday saying the same thing. While it does seem silly, and I am eager to mock inefficiencies, I think it's meant to be a safeguard against stolen or lost checks.

uh i got that letter on may 12, saying i would have my check by may 16. i still don't have the check. i called the irs yesterday about a different issue and they said they were mailing our check this friday and we should have it within two weeks. the point being, don't put too much credence in what that letter says

god we're getting a paper check and our last ssn numbers are SO HIGH. all the way to july for us:(

although i strongly suspect if i got that check today id be saying in july something along the lines of i wish we were getting a $1500 check this month

So I owed the USG money. They sent me a bill w/ a 1% late fee attached since I was stupid enough not to pay when I originally filed. I sent them a check. They cashed it. Then I get my stimulus check a few weeks later (a week after I got my COMING FRIDAY teaser) w/ the amount I owed deducted. WHAT THE FUCK GEORGE.

Where's the bank bitching thread, as predicted I want to bitch about Citibank.

A Thread on American Banking Options That Don't Suck a Caribou's Ass

indeed, mmm caribou arse

Yeah, ours had our final tax bill deducted too. I don't see how last year's taxes and this year's bribe have anything to do with each other!

RAAAAAAARRRRRWWW

I'm still waiting!

You and me both.

and my soc. ends in 20

I got mine of Tuesday, but I'd already spent most of it in pre-windfall anticapation.

^ true American

I'm tempted to actuall call the IRS (HA) about this, but given I owed last year, maybe now we'll be square for next year. Tho thinking about calling reminds of those halcyon pre-911 days when my then-roommate would light up a joint and call the IRS to bitch about how the income tax was unconstitutional and then not give supermarkets his personal info when signing up for a frequent shoppers' card and got one under the name LYSANDER SPOONER.

I'M STILL WAITING!!!! and after last weekends shennanigans i really need it. there are records to buy and shows to see and drugs to score and beers to drink.

and i should probably get some groceries at some point.

kevin otm; I got mine and am using to pay off my secured credit card so i can take back the money from the secured account

if i miss this simply saucer show i'm gonna be pissed.

finally received letter saying i'll receive the check on the 20th... we'll see how that goes

WHERE THE FUCK IS IT

will go towards my massive credit card bill from getting my car fixed or possible future dental work

-- bell_labs, Friday, April 25, 2008 8:47 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

it went towards 2 dresses from APC, a pair of shoes, a pair of jeans, and sushi

Ha -- I rec'd a SECOND check yesterday, "reimbursing" me the amount of owed taxes I paid prior to them sending out my first stimulus check w/ my owed taxes deducted from the original $$$$$$$ SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS $$$$$$$ despite me having paid the owed taxes well in advance (more than 1 month?) prior to the check being cut. GOVERNMENT IN ACTION AWRIGHT

Tom, you shd just walk over and ask.

el tomboto discovers the downside of working for the NSA: once theyve got you...theyve got you.

Can someone make I'M HELPING buttons / temp tattoos for folks that actually spend their stimbux on goods & services?

mine came yesterday, blew it on cheap beer and expensive burgers. that's not really blowing it though.

STIMULATIN'!!!!
xp

Check came yesterday. Can't cash it because it needs two signatures and my wife is out of the country. It will end up paying retroactively for a crown my wife recently had installed in her mouth. Easy come...

Once I get this it will pay off THE LAST OF MY DEBT and I will do a requisite I AM NOT IN DEBT post, so wheeeeeee

Congrats, fct. It's a whole new land, a good land, where cattle can grow fat on the wholesome grass and the meadowlark sings to the noonday sun.

Ha -- I rec'd a SECOND check yesterday, "reimbursing" me the amount of owed taxes I paid prior to them sending out my first stimulus check w/ my owed taxes deducted from the original $$$$$$$ SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS $$$$$$$ despite me having paid the owed taxes well in advance (more than 1 month?) prior to the check being cut. GOVERNMENT IN ACTION AWRIGHT

Woohoo! I guess I'll get a second check too! I thought that "we're deducting the amt of tax you owed" was bullshit if we'd already paid it.

ok so that date you get it based on your ss# did yall actually get it on yalls date?? cuz mine is june 27 but i wanna make sure i get it in time to pay the damn rent

it might. it might not. the gov's wheels grind at their own pace and there's no hurrying them.

mine was supposed to roll out in the second wave but i still havent gotten it yet

Sheeeit, I got mine back in May and I barely remember it, it was gone so fast...

I rec'd my first check within 7-10 days of the date I was sent (which I don't think was the date tied to my SSN).

I kind of thought that L-T was out of the $600 refund bracket.

I'm in the $350 bracket, I think.

cuz mine is june 27 but i wanna make sure i get it in time to pay the damn rent

-- and what, Tuesday, June 24, 2008 2:52 PM

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/614QGEkNBvL._SL500_AA240_.jpg

I'm just like wtf I used DD for my tax refund this year and my ssn ends in four nine so WHERE THE FUCK IS IT

I had budgeted only $1200 coming in to us ($600 + $600) until sunny reminded me that Beeps gets $300. So wow. $1500 on its way!

You can spend hers and she'll never even know!

wait is the ss# date when you get it or when they send it out?? daaaaamn

1/3rd on magic books/dvds
1/3rd on credit card debt
1/3rd in savings

@and what - Payments will be mailed no later than (and received a few days after):

i'm with tom in the WHERE THE FUCK IS IT dept.

flying to the mainland today w/ ticket paid for with mine

im in the june 20 group and i got my check yesterday now i have $600 in my pocket sup

im in the june 20 group and i got my check yesterday now i have $600 in my pocket sup

same except i bought dinner last night and paid for my pictures and bought some more film this morning. and i'm grilling steaks tonight. gonna party on a tuesday like i never have to work another wednesday in my life.

right on
im thinking maybe records

i started to but i'll wait until i get paid next week. there's a lot of shit i want to buy.

just got a letter saying i should receive it by 7/5 :) :) :) :) :)

FUCK TRAFFIC TICKETS

The letter hath arrived. Pass that check on.

I had budgeted only $1200 coming in to us ($600 + $600) until sunny reminded me that Beeps gets $300. So wow. $1500 on its way!

-- Pleasant Plains, Tuesday, June 24, 2008 2:14 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Link

i guess Beeps will be paying for my new iphone!

i did, in fact, wind up buying a boatload of records.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/07/02/nation-buys-porn-with-sti_n_110457.html

lololololololol

just got a letter saying i should receive it by 7/5 :) :) :) :) :)

-- am0n, Monday, 30 June 2008 23:05 (3 days ago) Link

got that too and shit is like twisting the knife...goin' on a road trip tomorrow and barely have enough $ for gas, woulda been great if the check was here today, but nope, i'll have the money after the weekend, when i don't need it nearly as much. plus I filed w/ direct deposit and had originally assumed i'd be getting this 2 months ago. and fuck, why send a letter a week beforehand? JUST SEND THE FUCKING CHECK IN THAT ENVELOPE ALREADY.

my friend only got $300... how is this possible? she has a pretty low income.

http://www.passiveonlineincome.net/image/finance-money.GIF

If your taxable income was under X (like $10k) you only got $300.

what some dude said.

herro dere checky

Finally it has happened to me
Right in front of my face
My feelin's can't describe it
Finally it has happened to me
Right in front of my face
And I just cannot hide it

Meeting Mr. Right, the man of my dreams
The one and only true love or at least it seems
With brown coco skin and curly black hair
It's just the way he looks at me, that gentle lovin' stare

Finally you come along
The way I feel about you it just can't be wrong
If you only knew the way I feel about you
I just can't describe him oh no no

CHORUS
CHORUS

It seemed so many times he seemed to be the one
But all he ever wanted was to have a little fun
But now you've come along and brightened up my world
In my heart I feel it I'm that special kind of girl

Finally you come along
The way I feel about you it just can't be wrong
If you only knew the way I feel about you
I just can't describe him oh no no

CHORUS
CHORUS

Finally
Ooooooooh finally yeah yeah
Oh

RAP: True love, a feelin' I never knew
Until you came into my life and now it's real
I never knew that I would find the time
Before you I thought love was blind

And my life was coastin' out my emotion
Too strong for words, you're set for devotion
A-pushin' me from mutual attraction
True love, the chemical reaction

Then my actions
Reflect those of a way to makin' this a better love
A never ending plan like man and wife
Flavourful to my life like a spice

Summon me to death, you're my big mean of protection
My one and only source of affection
So I'm puttin' all games behind me
I've been lookin' for the key to love and I've found it finally

CHORUS (to fade)

wow, i just got a letter from the IRS copping to the fact that they never sent me my stimulus check.

"we are required by law to mail the economic stimulus payment by dec. 31, 2008. we could issue the check by this date so you will note get the payment based on your 2007 tax account. however, you may be able to claim a credit on your 2007 federal return."

that's not quite as fun.

whoa

can we do this again?

we could issue the check by this date so you will note get the payment

i meant "we could NOT issue the check by this date so you will NOT get the payment" obv. so weird, i got the annoying letters saying "we will mail your check out soon!" and then nothing.

I think we are doing this again. You know since it worked so well last time.

i am checking all these threads to see if i posted about buying something with my stimulus check cause i don't remember getting it

bump

lol

bump

― I want to change my display name (dan m), Wednesday, March 25, 2020 9:28 AM (eight months ago) bookmarkflaglink

lol

lol

https://scontent-dfw5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/131979026_5661034237240841_4200980080725444965_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=W-MY5Aqhw4MAX_meJ7p&_nc_ht=scontent-dfw5-1.xx&oh=44120fe0dbeb310ffa963ab205c7b7a8&oe=60072CE7

Thank you, CNBC. No, sincerely: thank you. I don't know what I'd do without u, boo.

lol bulking up you emergency AND retirement saving with $600

thanks to this i'm gonna be able to retire three days early!!!!

I'm using my $600 to upgrade my cyanide tooth to a more fast-acting model.

"BULK UP your emergency savings, and get that retirement savings THICC!"

CNBC: the best use of your stimulus check is to immediately turn it over to a bank. The bank is getting a bit worried about your ability to repay that credit they extended to you. This is bad for their peace of mind.

i'm going to donate it to congresspeople so they can help us even moar

love this ilx-specific sad lol thread bump

i have not received my six hundred dollars yet

Plz 2 join the 'have not received my six hundred dollars yet' club. Membership fees are only six hundred dollars.

Mine’s getting direct deposited into a bank account that no longer exists. I can’t update my bank account # with IRS because trump and the GOP don’t want the executive branch to properly function

just got mine, partner did too, but she still hasn't received the 1,200. anytime she calls the IRS about it they 'transfer' her to a line that hangs up on her. tbh im amazed she can even get ahold of an actual person there to begin with

how much
she said
with six hundred dollars i'll do it

$1400!!

i will be receiving the balance of my "two thousand dollar check" on wednesday march 17

Still no $600
Still no sign of forthcoming $1400
America, why hast thou forsaken me

canst thou claim at least the $600 as a refundable tax credit?