http://i.imgur.com/G9uHH5q.jpg
There's a Polish butcher down the block from where we moved in. I went in one day, a gentrifying interloper with a budget, to find cheap chicken thighs, twelve different kinds of kefir and a wall of candy jars. Each of the candies was completely unfamiliar to me.
I am one of those guys who has a sweet tooth and has developed it into a personality trait: the guy who gets gummys and nonpareils at the movie theater, who has a line item for sweets to match my partner's wine budget.
I asked the woman behind the counter to please put together a mix of $20 worth of the candy and to please attempt to pick two of everything for me to try. It ended up being $25. Now I have A Big Bowl of Polish Candy. That's probably not right. Much of it is not Polish, it hails from Moldova or Spain or other places whose name doesn't appear on the label. But for the sake of this exercise, I'm going to consider it A Big Bowl of Polish Candy.
Let's try some.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 03:50 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/3orPOcA.jpgSo far, so good! This ended up being a reasonably decent dark chocolate covering over a whole dried apricot with an almond in the center. It tastes even better than it sounds. The apricot was moist in a lightish honey coating and the chocolate was crumbly but melt-in-your-mouth.8/10, would snack again.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 03:53 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/vhpVdAC.jpgA total and tasty surprise!Asking for Crabs at the candy store seems a bad idea. The first impression made it seem even worse: the candy comes out the wrapper as a dull pink lozenge the size of the first joint of your thumb. When you bite into it, the pink coating is revealed to be paper thin and underneath is something that tastes like a chick-o-stick mixed with chocolate. Nutty, chocolatey, crunchy, sweet and undeniably good.8/10, am going to end up going back to this place and getting a bag of Crabs.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 03:56 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/DJMw1D1.jpgDo Re Mi Bomboane are a thin inch long bar consisting of a layer of fruit jelly over crushed (hazel?) nuts and coated in chocolate. Less delicious than that sounds; the jelly was mostly flavorless and the chocolate was low quality and maybe a bit stale.https://madein.md/bomboane/do-re-mi-bucuria6/10, not bad exactly but neither memorable nor particularly worth trying again.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 04:01 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/GznZixZ.jpgCrazy bee is a gummy lump with a gelatinous interior. They apparently come in different flavors but this one had a sharp grapefruit citrus gummy flavor and a sweet nectar center. The gummy was mellow but the center was a tad cloying; even so I wouldn't mind trying the full flavor collection.https://roshen.cn/en/product/crazy-bee-fruity/7/10, could see giving this one another go.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 04:04 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/R0WVRrC.jpgMilky Splash fooled me. I assumed it was a garden variety caramel but nestled in the center is a lump of somewhat gooey condensed milk stuff that promptly coated my throat. The taste was like rimming a stick of butter. I gagged and spat it out on the street.1/10, hard pass.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 04:07 (two years ago) link
This thread is basically me every time I visit an east London corner shop
― a hoy hoy, Tuesday, 13 July 2021 09:14 (two years ago) link
yeah I pretty much did this when I went into a Georgian store a couple of weeks ago
― imago, Tuesday, 13 July 2021 10:16 (two years ago) link
Crabs are pretty good.
Anything made by Roshen will be Ukrainian (former President Petro Poroshenko’s company).
Look for Belochka chocolates in a little green packet with a squirrel on it if you go back.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 11:48 (two years ago) link
I am so, so jealous of you. I had a girlfriend in high school whose parents were both Polish, and they'd bring back these chocolate covered plums from Poland when they'd visit, or find them at a specialty shop in LA. just impossibly delicious. thirty-odd years later I got to go to Poland and the day before flying from there to england I had enough time in Krakow to find a supermarket -- turns out these plums are an old-folks staple sweet at Christmas, and it was early December, so I hit the jackpot. sooooo good.
― J Edgar Noothgrush (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 12:45 (two years ago) link
Would eat a candy called forksclovetofu
― Hideous Lump, Tuesday, 13 July 2021 13:09 (two years ago) link
Great thread. That apricot thing sounds fucking amazing.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 15:54 (two years ago) link
For Brooklyn-adjacent people interested in visiting and getting your own haul, here's the addresshttp://www.kensingtonbrooklynblog.com/2007/11/dans-select-meats.html
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 15:59 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/xomu0zC.jpgThis is very much like the first one that I posted, except that instead of an almond inside it, the apricot has chopped candied cherries on top. I prefer the flavor of this one and the texture of the first one but I will happily take either of these. JCLC, these are clearly the same species as your chocolate covered prunes... which I think I have several of in this pile waiting for me.8/10, total keeper
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:08 (two years ago) link
Great thread.
Would love to see photos of the unwrapped candies next to the wrapper.
― Carlos Santana & Mahavishnu Rob Thomas (PBKR), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:09 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/oYDo8SI.jpgA thin finger of chocolate-coated fudge with ground hazelnuts mixed into the filling. As with many of these so far, the flavors are strong, the mouthfeel is unctuous and a little goes a long way. Five minutes later, I'm still picking out infinitesimal grains of hazelnut from between my teeth. A bit of diabetic shock in green and nearly worth it.7/10, needs a warning label to eat no more than half.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:11 (two years ago) link
I will start adding pictures of the candies in the next batch.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:12 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/hlZAkbz.jpgA small chocolate covered square. When you bite in, it's tri-colored: black currant jelly up top, a thin layer of french marshmallow and a citrus jelly below that. Decent chocolate, distinct flavors for each of the jellies and a nice overall pairing but i'm not much for sheet gelatin treats without the gummy chewability.6/10, nice if you like that kind of thing
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:22 (two years ago) link
I hope you've got plums in chocolate somewhere in that bowl
― Alba, Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:29 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/30PdyNq.jpgThis little foil-wrapped button is the size of a gumdrop. Imagine a big glass jar filled with these! I had assumed this would be something soft and gentle, maybe a simple chocolate bonbon or a caramel. Instead what I got was a thin chocolate coating over a super-dense pink sugar blob of... well, i'm not sure what. Hardened nougat? Dry fondant? Suffice it to say it's hard enough where you can't bite through it with your molars so you have to chip away at it while it dissolves in your mouth. I guess this is meant to keep children busy as a suck toy/choking hazard? Truly a weird and unique candy memory but I dunno about doing this more than twice.9/10 for the packaging, 2/10 as candy, 7/10 as a one time experience
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:29 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/RiLiOrL.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/F8xqJZE.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/pB9xx6m.jpg
Lazy Cow is a thickly rectangular, chocolate-covered slab of styrofoamish wafers partitioned by thin sheets of supersweet vanilla milk frosting. Outrageously filling and a bit oversweet.4/10, all-in-all just a bit too much.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:36 (two years ago) link
This is my fav thread rn
― not up to Aerosmith standards (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:37 (two years ago) link
Lazy cow looks good to me.
forks, I'm worried for you if you've eaten these all today.
― Carlos Santana & Mahavishnu Rob Thomas (PBKR), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:44 (two years ago) link
lol i am definitely done until evening!
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:48 (two years ago) link
is there a nurse standing by
― not up to Aerosmith standards (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:50 (two years ago) link
this stuff is distinctly non-FDA approved
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 16:51 (two years ago) link
The gelatin one sounds a lot like those kosher-for-passover chocolate jelly things (which I don't much care for) - know what I'm talking about?
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:12 (two years ago) link
Roshen is a big Ukrainian company fwiw, and I notice some of those have cyrillic letters meaning they are probably not polish.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:32 (two years ago) link
I want the apricot one so bad.
― Ima Gardener (in orbit), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:36 (two years ago) link
These do seem like Ukranian candies rather than Polish ones. But they are next to each other after all.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:39 (two years ago) link
The apricot one looks like Polish.
Also, I looked up Bucuria (the "DoReMi" candy) and apparently it's Moldovan.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:45 (two years ago) link
Yeah, first one is Polish.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:49 (two years ago) link
you're right about the jelly passover candies MA; it's in the same family.
Now I have A Big Bowl of Polish Candy. That's probably not right. Much of it is not Polish, it hails from Moldova or Spain or other places whose name doesn't appear on the label. But for the sake of this exercise, I'm going to consider it A Big Bowl of Polish Candy.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:51 (two years ago) link
(incidentally the apricot treats have chopped walnut inside, not almond; my bad)
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 17:54 (two years ago) link
Great thread. I've seen a few of these in my trips to Atlanta -- the Buford Hwy Farmers Market has a good-sized Eastern European section, including its own deli/cheese/bakery cases. They have most of an aisle of Polish/Ukrainian/Moldovan/Russian/Czech/Belarusian/etc candy and biscuits.
― Profiles in Liquid Courage (WmC), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 18:07 (two years ago) link
xp - lol goddamnit, I don't read anymore!
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 18:12 (two years ago) link
Love this thread. This is reminding me of when I was fifteen and on a school exchange in Russia, and they took us on a tour of the Red October candy factory, which seemed to mostly make little bite-size oblong wafer-and-chocolate candies. It was like a kid's fantasy of being let loose in a chocolate factory; you could just reach out and grab chocolates off the conveyor belts. But they cleverly took us past the cheapest, sickliest chocolates first, so that by the time we got to the truly wonderful dark chocolate truffle wafers at the very end, we were all too full of bad milk chocolate to eat more than one or two.
― Lily Dale, Tuesday, 13 July 2021 19:04 (two years ago) link
Cant help but notice a lot of this supposed polish candy is clearly of ukranian manufacture
― fix up luke shawp (darraghmac), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 19:51 (two years ago) link
can't believe nobody has mentioned Juggalo candy itt yet
― not up to Aerosmith standards (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 19:52 (two years ago) link
If you bought it in America it’s American candy
― Clara Lemlich stan account (silby), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 19:52 (two years ago) link
if you bought it in Uruguay is it Uruguay candy or Myuguay candy
― not up to Aerosmith standards (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 19:55 (two years ago) link
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 13 July 2021 20:57 (two years ago) link
if the first picture is the entirety of the candy you bought am genuinely amazed that 25 dollars got you that amount. seems insanely expensive.
― oscar bravo, Wednesday, 14 July 2021 12:13 (two years ago) link
Yes, those are classic Polish grandmother treats:
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/proxy/j_JzS84k9SB3LXKA-7BEcVyY4zc2ACvYSJ6bq0z5vvM_MNBCCsxAPEEU-vpEyWag7ULpVnd3vtEdzkVrdbZ5TAyb4f18IfGBjQlCu0O4roQnUU0OTnhkTVYwdCpfI4ylhMmE_bX5weZGPSwSauEerVWqHz7ew15Jjfw-FyT_0SpEnDBz8i5sMpIXkLMZXnZpp7WoLXknu3XrE3cU1SY3rU7r82f3zg
― Sam Weller, Wednesday, 14 July 2021 14:16 (two years ago) link
damn, my polish grandmother would just give us unwrapped free cookies from the boat casino, claiming she'd baked them.
― it was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow card for chiellini (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 16:05 (two years ago) link
excellent thread, forks. looking forward to the next surprises. I can't criticize what my kids watch on youtube anymore -- I get it.
― it was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow card for chiellini (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 16:19 (two years ago) link
seems insanely expensive.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 17:56 (two years ago) link
the polish aisle in my local supermarket is a favourite because it's significantly cheaper than english chocolate (and often nicer). polish particularly fond on wafers and coconut things based on the stock there.
tons of polski skleps locally too, but i'm never sure of the vegetarian status of things so...
― koogs, Wednesday, 14 July 2021 19:24 (two years ago) link
(UK obviously closer to poland than the US)
I am somewhat addicted to Kucharek Universal Vegetable Seasoning but have never tried Polish sweeties, there are certainly plenty of opportunities to try them here!
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 19:48 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/4DL74lY.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/YtXJ1Dq.jpgHere's the much requested chocolate covered plums. Well, prunes really but that makes them sound a lot worse than they taste. They do indeed hold up to billing: soft, juicy fruit and reasonable quality chocolate add up to a flavorful and tangy little morsel that anyone would love.8/10, could definitely see having a small cache of these for visitors.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:00 (two years ago) link
Next time I go to Poland I’m going to have to try the ice cream version:
https://i.postimg.cc/15DSRxNk/BE85-B858-FED5-4-EDF-9-D2-A-9-BC4-EF01402-D.jpg
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:04 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/N2QFBA9.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/wzv6SQe.jpgThe taste of the chocolate-covered Pomawka Poweh soft nougat filling is disarming: lightly floral, as telegraphed by the packaging, but mostly grainy, sugary caramel with a whiff of alcohol on the tail end. It's strong with remarkably long legs and coats your throat like congealed honey.5/10, might be more into this if I could completely identify the flavor.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:06 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/6o1ep5j.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/mYqCyJn.jpgThe by-now expected thin layer of soft chocolate gives way to a coarse tile of leathery halvah-like substance, a milky and rough slab of dense protein bar. You could probably live on four of these a day.5/10, north of gross but south of enjoyable.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:10 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/SgQ9dcA.jpgSurprisingly delicate lump of puffed rice and nut butter filling in a chocolate-covered puffed rice shell embedded with tiny pellets of crushed nuts. Sort of a peanut butter flavored Ferrero Rocher with a vaguely coconut aftertaste? I'm into it.7/10, nice find!
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:14 (two years ago) link
the roshen Pomawka Poweh things are described as
"A Crème Brulee fondant filling with cacao and cognac flavoring coated with a chocolate glaze. Imported from Ukraine."
― koogs, Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:18 (two years ago) link
it’s actually “Romashka Roshen”, because Cyrillic - meaning Chamomile Roshen (those Ukrainian candy guys again)translating the names makes for some interesting results - would you say the name “Ladybug Soufflé” makes the milky and rough slab of dense protein bar above a) more or b) less appetizing?
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:29 (two years ago) link
The chocolate covered chocolate thing looks pretty good to me.
― Carlos Santana & Mahavishnu Rob Thomas (PBKR), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:32 (two years ago) link
btw this thread surprises me. for many, many years I had Polish chocolate down as bad quality stuff, based on the specimen I was offered one time. it might be time to re-examine.
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:35 (two years ago) link
“Ladybug Soufflé”
The word for ladybird (Korovka) has the same root concept as it does in Irish - ‘little cow’ or ‘God’s little cow’, so this would be ‘little cow soufflé’, which is at least 6% more appealing.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:47 (two years ago) link
I have Polish coworkers - whenever they visit our American offices, they only bring fancy boxed chocolates, never any of these exotic novelties
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:52 (two years ago) link
makes sense, was wondering why there cows and daisies on the wrapper but no actual ladybugsxp
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:56 (two years ago) link
apparently daisy is also ромашка in Ukrainian, is that correct? a very flexible word indeed!
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 20:58 (two years ago) link
I had a day on the ground in Krakow a couple years ago. I was very tired, and in a weird emotional space, and my train only got there at 3-ish and I had to fly to England the next day. For my Dad's funeral. Still, I spent my downtime in Krakow finding a supermarket so I could buy as many of those plums as my luggage could hold.
― J Edgar Noothgrush (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 22:18 (two years ago) link
Cognac and chamomile could definitely be the mystery flavor! Not sure that makes it any more palatable though...
"Ladybug Soufflé" is sort of the perfect name for that milky protein bar.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 03:34 (two years ago) link
The word for ladybird (Korovka) has the same root concept as it does in Irish - ‘little cow’ or ‘God’s little cow’
I learned this just yesterday! Someone who came to dinner at my house mentioned it.
― Lily Dale, Thursday, 15 July 2021 03:42 (two years ago) link
How do you say "...and garnished with lark's vomit" in Russian?
― Hideous Lump, Thursday, 15 July 2021 04:53 (two years ago) link
it’s the same in Dutch, come to think of it:sweet lord’s bug (“little animal”).
the Dutch word for daisy appears to be derived from sweet virgin, in reference to Mary.
(Mary is also being the “lady” alluded to in the bug’s name - German and the Scandinavian languages make this explicit)
“daisy” was originally “day’s eye” btw!
xp
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Thursday, 15 July 2021 05:20 (two years ago) link
apols for this etymology overdose, probably time for some new eye candy
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Thursday, 15 July 2021 05:22 (two years ago) link
being
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Thursday, 15 July 2021 05:24 (two years ago) link
http://bella.media.mit.edu/people/foner/Fun/gravity.html
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 05:50 (two years ago) link
I am totally going to stop at the one little euro market in town and grab some sweets, which I usually avoid because I have no idea what the hell is going on in any of those boxes. Will ask for help finding choco covered plums! Then will proceed onward to tummy ache and will blame this thread!
― mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Thursday, 15 July 2021 14:44 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/wIZZjny.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/90F0LAs.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/Jd0nCHp.jpgThis is the biggest candy in the stash; I'm posting the cyrillic info on the back for folks that can translate. It's roughly the size of a chips ahoy cookie and three times as thick. It tastes like a fruity mallomar: a thin soft chocolate shell dotted with some tiny fragments of crushed nuts over a puffy and yielding marshmallowy base that yields floral and sweet aftertaste over vanilla top notes. As with a lot of these candies, a bit more subtlety would likely make this more palatable but it's the sort of thing you could split with a kindred spirit and share a moment.6/10, a bit too much of a good thing.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 17:31 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/RC2MkuS.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/GQfn0Ym.jpgKorvika Roschen is a fingerlike slab of grainy, buttery caramel in spectacular packaging. I get the sense these would be better fresh and this one was most definitely not. Even so, the flavor intensity far surpasses Werther's, though the mouthfeel is stale.4/10, I think I got a bum steer.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 17:34 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/G73EpZe.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/7EBq7TR.jpgAmazing packaging makes the Kapa-Kym Poweh a seductive looking treat. The payoff is a finger of oily soft dark chocolate with mystery crunch crumbs and a soupçon of hazelnut/sesame flavor that evokes smokiness or - less pleasantly - burning. Not as bad as it might sound but not as good as the label promises. 6/10, the camel isn't lying but he's not all he's cracked up to be.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 17:40 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/iTFkMX7.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/X73SveF.jpgThe slightly psychedelic poppy wrapper belies the taste and consistency and presentation, which is all more or less exactly the same as the Kapa-Kym, minus the vague nuttiness. By the fourth of these candies my tastebuds are kinda fried, so maybe there's something else going on with flavor... but I doubt it.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 17:44 (two years ago) link
5/10, not much to get excited by.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 17:45 (two years ago) link
in ascending order: Червоний Мак: “Red Poppy” (indeed)Кара-Кум: “Karakum” (the Central Asian desert, so yes, camels - the sesame in particular makes this one sound very promising)Korivka: “Cow”Зефир - сладкие истории (зефир ванильный с орешками с шоколадной глазури):“Marshmallow - Sweet Stories (vanilla marshmallows with nuts in chocolate glaze)”this post was sponsored by G**gle Translate
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Thursday, 15 July 2021 18:31 (two years ago) link
I like how accurately forks’ descriptions match the candy’s name in some cases. I mean:a bit more subtlety would likely make this more palatable but it's the sort of thing you could split with a kindred spirit and share a moment <<iow>> “Sweet Stories>>
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Thursday, 15 July 2021 18:39 (two years ago) link
lol, you would think i work in marketing or something
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 July 2021 19:00 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/WYBwNcC.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/j0kNdN3.jpgChocolate covered apricot filled with a dense marshmallow. The apricot is sour, the marshmallow is a bit sickly and the overall impression is of spoiled fruit. Gah!1/10, now I am dying.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Saturday, 17 July 2021 18:04 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/CMi22UB.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/NnDpH5F.jpgFrying pan to fire: this swan sweet is thin chocolate over a block of marshmallow with the consistency and wan resistance of pork fat. Not much flavor and what's there is pretty poor. Ended up spitting this one out too.1/10, perhaps the local butcher doesn't like me?
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Saturday, 17 July 2021 18:08 (two years ago) link
wrong image:http://i.imgur.com/oe1w5ki.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Spa4UnZ.jpgAnother marshmallow bar but this one has better quality chocolate and filling and a bit more snap to the coating. There's a mix of graham cracker and coconut aftertaste. Following the prior two gutter candies, this is a vast improvement but not much to write home about.4/10, distinctly okay at best.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Saturday, 17 July 2021 18:10 (two years ago) link
Леди Ночь: “Lady Night”order more here
― ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts (breastcrawl), Saturday, 17 July 2021 18:11 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/vuXlgdr.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/aIJ2C1D.jpgBrown wad of presumable caramel, uncuttable by knife and resistant to chewing. Best I could do was scrape off the sides like a lump of wax. Flavor is used sugar. Not a good day of exploration.1/10, better as a building material than a candy.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Saturday, 17 July 2021 18:15 (two years ago) link
lady night has been canceled
tough showing for polish marshmallow
― "Rocky Top" and "Funky Bitch" are songs I never look forward to (Sufjan Grafton), Sunday, 18 July 2021 03:16 (two years ago) link
The whole ‘ptichye moloko’ (birds’ milk) genre of chocolate-coated ‘milk soufflé’ is not great, tbh.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Sunday, 18 July 2021 08:31 (two years ago) link
say more? that's a thing?
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Sunday, 18 July 2021 19:48 (two years ago) link
Yes, it’s a famous Polish sweet that has copycat versions across Eastern Europe. It’s generally lighter and less chewy than classic marshmallow.
The 4/10 one has the Bird’s Milk name and the 1/10 one, I’d guess, doesn’t have the trademark in Russia so it’s called something like Marvellous Bird, but they’re essentially the same thing.
I don’t like them at all but had a colleague who was absolutely addicted to them.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Sunday, 18 July 2021 19:57 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/0v70T1j.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/gyBBjzz.jpgA thin chocolate covered finger of extremely creamy hazelnut nougat, studded with orts of ground hazelnut. Delicious but flavorful to the point of overdoing it, coats the throat with a sugary residue.7/10, sort of like freebasing Nutella.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:30 (two years ago) link
http://http://i.imgur.com/1y92t9B.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/ZrpmKAp.jpg These Roshen Mont Blanc chocolates appear to have different fillings based by color but I only ate the one. As you can see, the design is a mountain in miniature, tipped by a white chocolate snowbank atop a milk chocolate base, studded with ground nuts and filled with a somewhat indeterminately flavored chocolate cream center. I gather this is the brand's upscale option; it's one of the only chocolates I've had from this bunch that isn't overpoweringly sweet or fatty on the tongue. It's a lot closer to mid-upper end American chocolate.7/10, definitely the choice if you're bringing a gift home to Grandma.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:36 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/rccfgc3.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/iF1dxDb.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/9QaSTAx.jpgBiting into this ivory button reveals a quarter-inch thick waxy shell surrounding a grainy lump of citrusy sugar paste. It tastes a bit better than it sounds but not by much. This may be past its sell by date.3/10, probably worth avoiding.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:39 (two years ago) link
Uh, dude, not sure if you noticed this, but that writing does not appear to be Polish
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:41 (two years ago) link
this has been gone over multiple times including the OP
― 《Myst1kOblivi0n》 (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:42 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/2OqarkM.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/66U1tKc.jpgChocolate coating over a generous dollop of macaroon-style shredded coconut with a core of the dreaded "bird's milk" marshmallow. Surprisingly that dubious treat in the center didn't do much to dissuade my enjoyment and only served to amplify the sugary flavor. Coconut covers a host of sins.6/10; if you think Mounds aren't sweet enough, this is your candy
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:43 (two years ago) link
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:44 (two years ago) link
xp - lol goddamnit, I don't read anymore!― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, July 13, 2021
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:45 (two years ago) link
some of that non-Polish for the first one:ліщина lishchyna = hazelцукерки tsukerki = sweets
― tean mean poleand cheaseang theas means hamseak feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:45 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/l7aCwUv.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/YCyszYJ.jpgWell, I knew before I bit it what I was getting into: chocolate coated "bird's milk" marshmallow in strawberry and vanilla flavors, which is not unlike gnawing on a lump of sweet congealed pork fat.1/10, this marshmallow stuff is very much for the birds.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:48 (two years ago) link
oh lol, i did the hazelnut one already. Same score too!
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:49 (two years ago) link
All the ones I think look good you hate :(
― Carlos Santana & Mahavishnu Rob Thomas (PBKR), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:50 (two years ago) link
Though I guess on some level they all look good to me.
🖼🖼Biting into this ivory button reveals a quarter-inch thick waxy shell surrounding a grainy lump of citrusy sugar paste. It tastes a bit better than it sounds but not by much. This may be past its sell by date.3/10, probably worth avoiding.
― tean mean poleand cheaseang theas means hamseak feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:54 (two years ago) link
fun thread! forks, what's a 10/10 candy iyo? I'm curious what your base of comparison is
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 18:56 (two years ago) link
10/10 over the counter chocolate candy for me might be skor, three musketeers, mounds? It's not great candy but it consistently hits the spot and that's more the scale I'm grading on, not gourmet chocolate.
I really do think a lot of these are stale as fuck, so bear that in mind and bump up the score accordingly if you find them on sale fresh in the wild! Would love this to be the rolling "i tried unfamiliar candy" picture thread for comparison scoring.
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:06 (two years ago) link
(every day i do this, i get a slight stomach ache... even though I'm only eating half the candy at this point!)
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:07 (two years ago) link
second showing for Леди Ночь/Lady Night, second 1/10let’s declare a marshmallow moratorium
― tean mean poleand cheaseang theas means hamseak feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:08 (two years ago) link
I would support that!
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:09 (two years ago) link
Look, I really don't know what your point is, and I'm not going to bother to "read" your "replies," but I know the Cyrillic alphabet when I see it.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:35 (two years ago) link
ЛОЛ
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:41 (two years ago) link
O'ryllic?
― Yours in Sorrow, A Schoolboy: (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 19:42 (two years ago) link
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, July 28, 2021 3:35 PM (twenty-four minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
Is this a serious post?
I can't tell anymore around here.
― Carlos Santana & Mahavishnu Rob Thomas (PBKR), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:04 (two years ago) link
skor, three musketeers, mounds
is this a serious post?!
― "Rocky Top" and "Funky Bitch" are songs I never look forward to (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:23 (two years ago) link
what over the counter US mass-produced chocolate candy is your 10/10?i would add reese's to that list
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:24 (two years ago) link
NB: it's a steep grading curve for that stuff; i am not out here heavily stanning 3 musketeers! But it's what I buy if I get chocolate craving at a cvs.
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:25 (two years ago) link
I haven't had a 3 musketeers in years maybe decades, but Skor def punches above its weight iirc
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:33 (two years ago) link
adding reese's makes it more relatable. feel like none of the other 3 will crack the top 3 as 10/10 standbys when steve harvey throws it to the board.
― "Rocky Top" and "Funky Bitch" are songs I never look forward to (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:34 (two years ago) link
selection of mounds over almond joy and 3 musketeers over snickers does help us calibrate our levels, though
― "Rocky Top" and "Funky Bitch" are songs I never look forward to (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:37 (two years ago) link
'select 3 items from A Big Bowl of Polish Candy' will be a new branch of psychoanalysis
― "Rocky Top" and "Funky Bitch" are songs I never look forward to (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:41 (two years ago) link
I think there's a widesoread belief over here that American chocolate is weird and terrible.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:52 (two years ago) link
Well…
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:53 (two years ago) link
I'm wondering if these 'Polish' candies might be a little sweet for American tastebuds.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:54 (two years ago) link
If there's one thing your average American chocolate lacks, it certainly isn't sugar.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:55 (two years ago) link
these are all WAY sweeter than I'm used to!
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:57 (two years ago) link
the man alive special: https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0007/9744/2107/products/npblossomgel_400x.png?v=1620405350
― tean mean poleand cheaseang theas means hamseak feasts (breastcrawl), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:57 (two years ago) link
anyways you're right in noting that i don't like peanuts or almonds in my candy as a general rule
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:58 (two years ago) link
If there's one thing your average Eastern European chocolate lacks, it certainly isn't sugar.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 20:58 (two years ago) link
I grew up in Scotland, where the concept of something being too sweet doesn't exist. I mean this stuff should probably be illegal on dental health grounds at least:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tablet_(confectionery)
btw pom:
Tablet is almost identical to Québécois sucre à la crème.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:02 (two years ago) link
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, July 28, 2021 4:52 PM (five minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
― pomenitul, Wednesday, July 28, 2021 4:53 PM (four minutes ago)
definitely true at the level of a Hershey's bar, but you can, of course, get nice US-made chocolate
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:02 (two years ago) link
I think Hershey's is US chocolate to people outside the US.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:06 (two years ago) link
I've never tasted it.
you can, of course, get nice US-made chocolate
Oh yeah, you can nice US-made anything (or very nearly). I was thinking in terms of the typical, ubiquitous stuff.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:06 (two years ago) link
As for sucre à la crème, yeah, it's blindingly intense and I'm all for it – just not more than maybe twice a year? I'll definitely try Tablet when I get the chance.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:07 (two years ago) link
Anyway my Eastern European candy/chocolate challop which I'm allowed to state point blank is that 95% of them suck and are only worthwhile as exotic artifacts. The desserts are where it's at.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:08 (two years ago) link
absolutely, just want visitors to know it's okay to eat the fancy chocolate lol
isn't Hershey's not technically chocolate or something?
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:09 (two years ago) link
You'd have to go to Scotland to try it, no-one else is insane enough to make it and feed it to their children.
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:10 (two years ago) link
Proper link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tablet_(confectionery)
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:12 (two years ago) link
I'll be on the lookout for it once I get there – it's a question of when not if.
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:12 (two years ago) link
I've never had Tablet or sucre à la crème but the image in that wiki article looks a lot like burfi, which is the only Indian sweet I really like
― rob, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:12 (two years ago) link
tablet sounds like the babyface candy stuff upthread
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:13 (two years ago) link
ILX struggles with Wikipedia links that feature closing parentheses, so you have to copy/paste it.
2xp
― pomenitul, Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:13 (two years ago) link
Fuck me, that link doesn't work either. Anyway, you can feel your teeth rot as you eat it etc. Indian sweets are even worse though!
― Wouldn't disgrace a Michael Jackson (Tom D.), Wednesday, 28 July 2021 21:13 (two years ago) link
Evan ate a bunch of these leftovers and lived to tell the tale
― When Young Sheldon began to rap (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 12 October 2021 01:23 (two years ago) link
Indeed! Not so bad. Lots of various waxy textures iirc
― Evan, Tuesday, 26 October 2021 16:17 (two years ago) link
I got a bag of wrapped candies from the Swedish company Sockerbit. They’re good! Much better allocation of sugar than the last pile so I can eat a bit more in one sitting without feeling poisoned.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Monday, 17 January 2022 21:41 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/fw6UCGh.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/ZrjiAxM.jpg Gingerbread Caramel - Outrageously strong gingerbread flavor, tastes just like one of the gummyish corners of a tray of fresh gingerbread. Absolutely outrageous, totally delicious. Would eat a pile of these without noticing, probably lucky that I can’t immediately find these for sale on their own on the website. 10/10.
http://i.imgur.com/W5X373Y.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/Ql6WNA0.jpgFransson’s Polkakola - Peppermint taffy with a slightly creamy flavor and consistency. Nothing exciting but the freshness and natural taste made it a treat. 8/10
http://i.imgur.com/1CVO5Sk.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/UBxIWjd.jpgGrahn’s BRAVO - Thinner-than-Starburst-sized individually wrapped bits of flavored toffee. The Gräddknäck flavor is vaguely ginger and coffee, the Lakrits is a pungent but not unpleasant licorice and Choklad is exactly what you would expect. The size and relative kick of flavor makes me think that a jacket pocket full of these would be great to have for blood sugar emergencies or to pacify kids… or just me. 7/10
http://i.imgur.com/KZBhpKC.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/lbKKsf7.jpgKick Original - Billed as “My Soft Licorice Toffee” on the wrapper, it delivers exactly that. Creamy after chewed and without the tannic leather flavor I associate with lower quality black licorice. It’s not going to win any converts but if you like that flavor, this is a great option. 7/10
http://i.imgur.com/dLVeiBn.jpgKolafabriken Lemon Toffee - Harder than many of these other taffies but possessed of a subtle, enjoyable citrus flavor. There’s lots of different flavors, but this is all I had at the moment. 7/10
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Monday, 17 January 2022 21:42 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/txevX5E.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/w7Xq2nx.jpgHem-Kola - Starburst-sized wrapped squares of toffee. Hasselnötter original is caramel, Chokolad is chocolate. Both are fine and would easily surpass most of the “original” big bowl but in this company it’s middling at best. 6/10
http://i.imgur.com/YBHcBgW.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/w5Qc27W.jpgMarianne - Thin white peppermint shell over a chocolate shell for the red ones and over caramel for the blue ones. The blue ones are fine but it’s the red ones I love. The temptation is to crunch these, which makes them into lightly chocolate flavored peppermint candies but trial and error has taught me to breath them as lozenges to suck on. The peppermint is mild and sweet and eventually gives way to a now mostly liquid core of chocolate that gets much more flavorable now that it’s body temperature. I just bought a quarter pound. Blue ones are 6/10, Red ones are 10/10
http://i.imgur.com/bvj1Wjv.jpgPim Pim Klubba - Mellow strawberry flavor lollipop. Super-dense candy, not a chewing lollipop but a legit sucker. Not bad, but not the way I prefer to consume candy. 6/10
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Monday, 17 January 2022 21:43 (two years ago) link
does removing this from Poland kill the interest? Who woulda thought.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 20 January 2022 23:23 (two years ago) link
I've a swedish colleague that occasionally brings back marabou bars. The black saltlakrits are particularly great. I've read and enjoyed these updates.
― Ssäm Sauce | Martha Stewart (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 21 January 2022 00:03 (two years ago) link
no, this is gold. xp.always wanted to try maleco pastellfiskar.
― The 25 Best Songs Ever Ranked In Order (Deflatormouse), Friday, 21 January 2022 00:05 (two years ago) link
I find the soft, salty licorice things smell faintly of urine, like the sheep kidneys in Ulyesses
― Andy the Grasshopper, Friday, 21 January 2022 00:53 (two years ago) link
This thread is great... thank you for sharing these candies.
― visiting, Friday, 21 January 2022 01:05 (two years ago) link
i am avoiding the salt licorice stuff tbh; i've tried them once and it was like eating shoe leather in curdled piss. not something I'm looking to repeat.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Friday, 21 January 2022 01:52 (two years ago) link
lol
but do u like regular black licorice?
― bad milk blood robot (sleeve), Friday, 21 January 2022 01:59 (two years ago) link
standard licorice, when either mild or particularly raw anise, is fine by me. That licorice thing upthread was pretty tasty!
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Friday, 21 January 2022 02:36 (two years ago) link
as long as i have your attention: where can i get grab bags of foreign candies online? Or better yet, buy them for me and then send them to my home. I will eat them for your amusement.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Friday, 21 January 2022 02:53 (two years ago) link
https://www.candywarehouse.com/international-candy
??
― bad milk blood robot (sleeve), Friday, 21 January 2022 03:45 (two years ago) link
not sure if they sell samplers tho
Not so much. Once Omicron blows over, maybe I can start going to places in the city.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Friday, 21 January 2022 03:50 (two years ago) link
Polkakola is my favorite name, but I would love to try the Mariannes.
― peace, man, Friday, 21 January 2022 12:20 (two years ago) link
my mom got me 6 months of universal yums for xmas and the first month is polish. i haven't opened it yet, though.
― towards fungal computer (harbl), Friday, 21 January 2022 12:34 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/MSaBkyc.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/pzTuRKK.jpg
This elegant looking, ballet branded block of candy is sold as kinda premium chocolate and it mostly lives up to the price hike: silky chocolate, ground hazlenuts, no chemical aftertaste or overly harsh sugar flavor. Sort of a milder, richer Ferraro Rocher. 7/10 would eat again but could probably get better for the money.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:04 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/0dAwh1C.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/fs8BcK9.jpgAnother sort of hazelnut whipped, airy chocolate center, somewhat sweeter but without chemical aftertaste. 7/10, good and better than a lot of prior offerings in this thread but a little undistinguished.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:13 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/aesbaPb.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/qvjNHUn.jpgChocolate-enrobed lemon creams. As you might imagine from past reports, the lemon is outrageously sweet and somehow creamy. It avoids the dreaded evocative scent of floor wax, but really only barely. Its tastier than I'm giving it credit for but the INTENSITY of the goddamn thing is such that half of one might be a better snack. Eating a whole one (and they're the size of your first pinky knuckle) coats your throat in saccharine citrus. 6/10, a little goes a long way.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:16 (two years ago) link
are you ready for the next one? I wasn't.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:17 (two years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/wtpyXW3.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/F6GFEYF.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/ocEAjxm.jpg
At $12 a pound, wrapper and all, the Boletto Premium was the most expensive item in the candy counter and, if not for this thread, I surely would've skipped it. But curiosity set in, so I got one. Imagine my surprise upon opening this treat to discover that the external advertising was all too accurate. This thing looks just like a mushroom and slips out of the cellophane with a pre-moistened glisten of lubrication. Alas, it turns out to be made out of the aforementioned and generally disgusting "bird's milk souffle" marshmallow, a dense and coagulated lump of oversweet hog fat. The "head" is covered in thick milk chocolate and the "stem" is inexplicably crawling with a generous smattering of poppy seeds and then split up the middle. This is presumably to allow for sharing but the effect is near-pornographic. 1/10, everything here is a bad idea and i feel bad for eating the little bit that I did.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:26 (two years ago) link
Oh no.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:27 (two years ago) link
Creamy mushroom souffle, hat covered with chocolate glaze, leg sprinkled with poppy seeds.Unfolding the wrapper you will see just a 100% copy of this fungus)Very original design.A wonderful idea.Incredibly delicate taste.
Unfolding the wrapper you will see just a 100% copy of this fungus)
Very original design.
A wonderful idea.
Incredibly delicate taste.
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:33 (two years ago) link
I don’t think it’s meant to be sweating like that.
― Scampo di tutti i Scampi (ShariVari), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:44 (two years ago) link
it was not very inviting
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 February 2022 23:48 (two years ago) link
IRL LOLs, thanking u
― bad milk blood robot (sleeve), Thursday, 17 February 2022 00:18 (two years ago) link
harbl, you need to post pix
― i cannot help if you made yourself not funny (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 17 February 2022 01:24 (two years ago) link