Breast Augmentation

Also, what are you looking to get as a result of enlarged breasts? When it comes to school days, I know from personal experience that harassment of that sort can be traumatic. (I was hassled because I was the first to develop and usually was the most heavily endowed in any group.) However, the teasing was probably less about the size of your breasts than that turned out to be an effective way to get your goat.

I'd been thinking I want them just because I want them - never had them and now there's a way I can - but Douglas, I think maybe you do have a point - maybe I am letting the 16 year old me boss the 30 year old me around...

Maybe I should just buy more padded bras.

I have nothing against plastic surgery (whatever makes you happy), but just remember that on skinny women GREAT BIG CARTOON BOOBS can look kind of weird.

That is all.

Anyway - I digress - I can see where you're coming from, but my aunt had them done though her armpit after breast cancer (giving what my grandmother, looking for the positive side of the illness, called "lovely Pride and Prejudice boobs"). She hated the drainage tube, and to be honest I think she'd have rather kept her old ones.

??????

(Is it some kind of rhynming slang?)

"Shoes," Sheila Jeffreys says, "are almost becoming torture instruments. During a woman's daily make-up ritual, on average she will expose herself to more than 200 synthetic chemicals before she has morning coffee. Regular lipstick wearers will ingest up to four and a half kilos during their lifetime." We are talking about Jeffreys' latest book, Beauty And Misogyny: Harmful Cultural Practices In The West, and she is in full flow about the horrors of what she calls "the brutality of beauty".

This is so over-the-top.

HOORAY! Welcome to society. This is your cultural birth. You are welcome here, as long as you don't say douchey things like that anymore.

for the record, my friend posted that and forgot to log out - I'm perfectly happy with my own boobs k thx bye.

-- luna (luna.c), Sunday, July 31, 2005 8:54 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Link
i was gonna say!

-- jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, July 31, 2005 8:56 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Link

looool

http://www.bigpunforever.com/9p.jpg

I think it's ridiculous to reply (to her friend) that you, a poster, like small breasts. Some like'em small, some like'em big. It doesn't so much matter what one particular person thinks, just what she feels. She wasn't going from tiny boobies to superbazookas (which, if I recall correctly very few surgeons would give her). That said, there are a lot of dangers to it (fucking up immune system, leakage, nipple insensivity,...).

I wonder what she did. Did she have'em done or not?

Let's not keep this thread anywhere close to the top. Chaki's on a personal tear to badmouth Luna. This is not a real revival.

nice work not keeping it from the top, mizzz.

uh hello, it's not luna, misery. it's her ex-flatmate.

That was not a real revival, I guess.

This is kinda sad. I dunno what's up with this whole "Luna is fake" thing, but is it really worth the trouble, Chaki?

Her ex-flatmate who...also read/s ILX?

http://www.motorclassico.com/imgs/imagens/1136743978E5bSL0ar2Kx42ZM9.gif

Is it any trouble?

http://www.emediawire.com/prfiles/2005/03/15/218865/pic004.jpg

http://www.sustainabletable.org/images/features/realfoodrevival/realfoodrevival.jpg

Oh shit, sorry. Yes, I know I just put it back on top, but still... sorry. :-(

what is dogmentashion, is that when it gets bigger
because i thought only boys could do that

^^^ Im sorry that wasn't me that was the cat

bump

say your piece up front instead of the rigamarole

^ a breast augmentation motto

we all have friends that post in the same style as us and use our computers right?

x3

Ease off, Chaki. You don't think it was really me posting to all those lingerie/stockings threads? My roommate, I tell ya, he's a terror.

ok, laurel. sowwy.

And when Ally and I get together, we totally do not talk about lingerie for one second. Nope.

laurel you live with kenan?

do you have something belong to luna
i can sniff it and find her and tell who she is

did she send NE1 her underwarez

probably

Extra big boobs jobbe on the narrow can very much have a "martini olives on a toothpick" effect. Distracting. That's right everyone, I get distracted by boobs.

that happens to me with testyculls

Breast augmentation == green beans and mashed potatoes.

im not exactly sure what abbott means, but does anyone here love gin/vodka-soaked olives?? i knew a girl who ate them like m&m's. ive never actually tried one, because i do not drink martinis, because they are for girls.

i do not drink martinis, because they are for girls.

Yeah, and say that right to Mr. Connery's face, chickenshit.

Truth is beauty; beauty truth
Three parts gin to one vermouth

***

RIP original martini. I'm pouring a 40 for you.

i think you mean mr bond, & couldnt say that to his face, because he's fake

xp

i do not drink martinis, because they are for girls.

What is WRONG with you?

Wait, first: what DO men drink?

Maybe he means this abominable new trend of making fancy-ass cocktails with expensive liquers and an ounce of vodka, and pouring them into martin glasses and calling them like "Madison Avenue Sin-ammon'tini." A martini glass does not mean a martini, yuppie fux!

we drink things like beer & whiskey & rum & when we get real crazy, vodka. ive never seen a guy order or ask for a martini in my life.

xp i would honestly be embarrassed to be drinking anything from a martini glass

& when we get real crazy, vodka
& when we get real crazy, vodka
& when we get real crazy, vodka

oh come on there's a huge diff b/w gordon's & a martini, are you kidding?

my friends all get scotch which seems like "look, i'm wearing daddy's shoes!" to me.

!! I prefer a Gibson to a Martini, but I drink them often enough.

You'd be embarrassed?! A real man couldn't give less of a fuck who sees what he's drinking as long as he, himself, enjoys it.

I wonder if they will serve me a beer in a martini glass if I ask for a beertini.

i personally dont like being made fun of. i guess its a curse.

Hello, yes.

I will down scotch like 300 count downage. Damn damn damn that stuff is tasty. I like Buchannan's right now and Chivas too. Scotch does seem like a boardroom drink but I do not care. I also do not care if anyone sees me drinking drinks that are essentially candy.

YOU ARE A GIRL

i drink WATERS

i am a boy for reference

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3322023547877728768&q=girl+drink+drunk&total=958&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0

A girl? Disgusting. What's SHE doing here?

Ordering a martini.

Yes do you not think women get accused of being an old useless Naturalizer-wearing chainsmoking retirement home person if they order:

-Scotch and soda
-Whiskey and ginger ale
-Whiskey and grapefruit juice

???

Which besides gimlets and beer are the main things I order in bars?

Walking around at a party slugging from a 25% full bottle of Drambuie is pretty sweet tho.

HAVING HER PERIOD PROBABLY, UGH

MENTAL STRATION

Abbots, is that...SCOTCH? NO!! Put it back, you shamless hussy, and leave it for the menfolk when they come back from raping and pillaging and shooting things. Do it again and I'll put you on bread and Cosmopolitans for a week.

APPLE MIDORI ITSY BITSY TEENY WEENY YELLOW SUGARY MARTINI:

DO NOT WANT

WILL NOT RENEGE VULVULAR STATUS EITHER

whiskey and grapefruit juice sounds like a John Justen & Fluffy Bear-level concoction.

laurel i have told you what my mom says about gin, right?

ok, anything and graprefruit juice, actually

Yeah. Whiskey and grapefruit sounds brutal!

NOM NOM NOM

I invented it myself. I call it "The Old Person."

i drank whiskey and root beer recently b/c it was the only mixer i had in the house and it was jim beam or something gross. it was NOT AS GROSS AS YOU WOULD THINK.

Sure could go for a Woo Woo right now.

"We're Irish. We drink whiskey. Vodka is for women and fags."

kenan's anatomy lesson on the complexities of the penis v breast

I was gonna say, I associate grapefruit with my (dead) grandma.

Scotch / whiskey = drink of choice for practically every NYC girl between the ages of 22 and 35.

scotch/bourbon/whiskey + water, why don't more people just keep it simple & real?

"not as gross as I would think" = still fucking disgusting

Rumpleminze is the bomb son

I like it neat mainly. I do feel like an elderly alcoholic sitting around watching South Park with three fingers of room temperature Wild Turkey in hand.

it = loveable potent brown 80 proofs

whiskey makes me too sassy.

does vodka make you classy?

Rebel Yell makes me bold 'n' brassy. ie my friend and I have a drinking contest of it and she vomits in the bushes while I sadistically laugh. uh.

Wait, I sound dismissive: let's say scotch / whiskey are the drinks of choice for many young women in NYC, and I find this totally understandable, given the kind of persona many are trying to project.

(We should not kid ourselves that drink choices are in large part about persona-projection, hence discussion of what drinks are manly enough, etc.)

Booze Augmentation

I've really never met a liquor I haven't liked. :(

I like anything with lime, really, but the acidity does a number on my throat that's about commensurate with smoking an extra pack of cigarettes.

you have not met banana schnapps, Abbott

that's more of a liqueuuur

I had "41 Bananas" or whatever that 80 proof liquer is called but I don't remember it.

what persona does drinking sparkling rose project? i am scared to find out.

Depends on what kind it is.

not andre

an AWESOME one.

abbot and i share alcoholic affinities

I drink this a lot, bell labs.

http://www.klwines.com/Detail.asp?sku=1015268

It's quite good and cheap, too.

i never meant to suggest abbott was anything less than awesome. just that liking candy-flavored drinks is usually a sure suggestion that yr female.

and i also honestly dont get how anyone can like rose, which tastes like soured fruit juice, & has about as much punch.

GUISE,
THIS THREAD IS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT TITTAYS

Aw when I was hibernating, I had an IV drip hooked up to fermenting fruits.

"We're Irish. We drink whiskey. Vodka is for women and fags."

-- Laurel, Monday, October 15, 2007 7:39 PM (20 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Close.

"Straight gin is a whore's drink."

She might not be wrong.

Fake tittays are barely tittays at all.

Goddamnit, this might just be the most frustrating thread I've ever read at work.

Boobs and booze. Great Monday topics. Productivity THROUGH THE FLOOR.

But seriously - boobs, small or large, are wonderful things. Just wonderful.

Being able to drink whatever the hell you want to, without giving a fuck what anyone else things = being an adult drinker

Martini = Gin and vermouth, proportions to taste. Olives, twist or onion are the only acceptable garnish. It is doing a disservice to this fine, fine cocktail to call ANYTHING else a martini. Including a vodka martini. This is why there are good bartenders and not-as-good bartenders - a good bartender will make you exactly the drink you want. A not-so-good bartender will make you a drink that he/she thinks you want.

we drink things like beer & whiskey & rum & when we get real crazy, vodka. ive never seen a guy order or ask for a martini in my life.

Make richer friends.

Also, gin martinis pwn everything.

tittay simulacrum

Titties and booze both ideally go in the mouth, so we're not that far off topic.

anyone remember Sabrina The Teenage Witch's Cribs episode, where she had bottles of Beefeater stashed throughout her house?

Martinis are the opposite of candy-flavored, so you're not making any more sense than before, deez.

Hahah, RW, I've had straight gin before, but I think only since it was smuggled into the club in little bottles. Then made out with a stranger on someone's doorstep, so maybe yr mum was right.

I also do not care if anyone sees me drinking drinks that are essentially candy.

-- Abbott, Monday, October 15, 2007 7:28 PM (38 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

why do you hate me, laurel?

Breast amplification > breast augmentation.

Martini = Gin and vermouth, proportions to taste. Olives, twist or onion are the only acceptable garnish. It is doing a disservice to this fine, fine cocktail to call ANYTHING else a martini. Including a vodka martini. This is why there are good bartenders and not-as-good bartenders - a good bartender will make you exactly the drink you want. A not-so-good bartender will make you a drink that he/she thinks you want.

I want to hoist you into the air out of love.

***

Re: boobs: A GA in my class has the Miss Chokesondick saggy braless boobs thing going on. Not so bad were it not that her nipples are always nipping and the left one is almost TWO INCHES HIGHER than the right one. My god, I can't hear a thing in that class. It's like having to stare at Alfred E. Neuman-style uneven eyes combined with Magritte's "Rape."

Turn those tittays up to 11!

I don't hate you! But you're being an ass on this thread.

Other people are just more polite than I am about mentioning it.

But maybe we could forestall the whole disagreement if there was only a list of foods & drinks that were divided by gender? That would sure simplify my next dinner party.

I am slightly less stringent in my definition of a martini drink; to me, a martini is:

1) all alcohol
2) served straight up in a martini glass

There are girly martinis and non-girly martinis; the best one (when I am drunk I will say the ONLY one) is the aforementioned gin original.

It is distracting when a woman with large boobs is wearing a low-cut shirt. Well, that's always distracting. It is more specifically distracting when they have kind of a fold between the individual L & R cleavages and their chest. Mayne you know what I mean? Like not the classic inverted letter U. more like a W somehow. Esp. is there is dewy boobsweat.

Women: Midori Sours, chocolate fountain, Healthy Choice microwave dinners

Men: Everclear-drinking contest, microbrews, an entire roast beast

It is distractingAWESOME when a woman with large boobs is wearing a low-cut shirt

No, wait, that would suck, that would mean I have to a) invite only other women, b) not eat anything myself, or c) make two whole separate meals. Sigh. If only we lived in a less restrictive society! Maybe somewhere there is a place where men and women can be free to dine as they please! I will find it, and call it...The Promised Land, and it will flow with alfredo sauce and Laphroaig.

Yeah, I'm too obvious about staring tho so I feel on edge the whole time, like a 15-yr-old stoned kid who thinks every other car on the road is a cop or can tell he's stoned.

xp

It is distracting AND AWESOME when a woman with large boobs is wearing a low-cut shirt.

Will I die if I drink some of these tasty martinis while staring at boobs and taking antibiotics?

Are you also driving?

no

http://youtube.com/watch?v=loTnVc-uhQM

Or taking birth control pills?

I love you guys.

"Straight gin is a whore's drink."

i have also heard this. but far more importantly, straight gin is nasty

be careful, esp if it is a sulfa antibiotic

why is chaki's roommate reviving all these threads?!?!?!

far more importantly, straight gin is nasty

otm. like shoving a pine tree down your throat. i love gin drinks, though.

Amoxicillin + booze & boobs will bring me death or stomach ache?

I think a hangover is more likely, don't you?

tittay simulacrum

-- milo z, Monday, 15 October 2007 20:03

a+++

far more importantly, straight gin is nasty

-- mookieproof, Monday, 15 October 2007 20:18

f---

Also, for shoving a pine tree down your throat, nothing beats retsina.

GIN SMELLS LIKE CHRISTMAS. it is a girly drink & i like it, with tonic. ok? so stop hating me.

although - "A Gin & Tonic is noted as the most frequent drink of military men, and being a former US Army officer, I would know."
http://www.styleforum.net/archive/index.php/t-13678.html

lol jeff

Oh man, jeff wins.

1st prize = free boobs

lol freeboobs r hueg

I've alway thought that my mother's generous endowment compared to my paltry allottment added up to yet another downward-mobility inheritance fuckover. I could never spend money on plastic surgery, though. I'd rather spend it on gin, and cry into my cocktail re: the raisins on the ironing board predicament.

freeballin:freeboobin::dudes:ladies

And now that I am nearing the golden years, suffice it to say, things between the collar and the belt haven't gotten any more scenic. Southerly a tad.

But no palm trees.

now i really need a drink. to hell with antibiotics

is it really true that lots of girls wear bras to bed to prevent sagging? there are so many mysteries about my own gender, like that whole foot flushing thing.

Foot...wait, waht??

how did you miss that one!?

Here's one for the ladies re public toilets . . .

ok that was surprisingly easy to find.

Ohhh THAT kind of flushing. Right, I do that.

people wear their bras to bed?

ive done the foot flushing thing, u feminist fucks.

hahahahahahahaa

Do urinals flush? The only times I've used them, I've been too drunk to notice.

you use your elbow to flush urinals

Flying reverse roundhouse kick

prehensile cock

in america, the perfect tittay will plug the toilet

reprehensible cock

believe it or not laurel, men do shit. but we coat the seat with toilet paper first.

Calling something a martini simply b/c it is in a martini glass would be like calling ANYTHING you drink out of a pint glass a beer.

I am not knocking anything else that might be served in a martini glass - I had several gin deliciouses (basically, a gin lemon drop) on Friday night, and was perfectly happy with my results (drunk). Cosmos, gimlets, gibsons, etc...they're all different, and, as such, have different names.

On another topic, a gin delicious is the best drunken plural ever...

I'LL HAVE THREE GIN DELICIOUSES PLEASE becomes I'LL HHAFF THHHREEE GIN DELISHISHISHESH PLEESH

xp our poo smells of cigar smoke and cedar

All said while staring at the bartendresses tittays.

"Vodka gimlet" is surprisingly hard to say after getting outside a few of 'em. I often have to mentally rehearse and steel myself for the pronunciation.

I think you're missing the "all alcohol" bit in my definition, B.L.A.M.

I missed the "to bed" in Bell's post and I was all "I don't know what kind of magic chest you have, but yes, some women ..."

I know. I'm just being a stickler.

http://www.breastaugmentationvirginia.com/articles/images/Breast_augmentation_BAV5.jpg

now if they could only get it where Bombay Sapphire pours out.

this thread is rad in directly inverse proportion to the not location specific thread

This is not a real revival.

oh it was so very real.

Are you pissed off because she wouldnt fuck you, or something?

now if they could only get it where Bombay Sapphire pours out.

I think you have to kill the Beholder squeezing out first.

lol maybe you should read the ilx heaven thread, trayce. i'll be awaiting my apology.

"Vodka gimlet" is surprisingly hard to say after getting outside a few of 'em. I often have to mentally rehearse and steel myself for the pronunciation.

dude you just need more practice! i believe.

Lotsa people've doubted Luna's existence all thru history

!!! !! !!!!!! !! !!! !!!!!!!!!! !!

-- woodstock, Monday, August 1, 2005 12:52 AM (2 years ago)

Hendricks ans Noilly Prat please, with an onion.

Dang Perry you are wrong because a manhattan is not a martini.

i thought a manhattan traditionally wasn't served in a martini glass?

I think manhattan yes and the very similar old fashioned, no.

i mean manhattans are frequently served in martini glasses today, but i thought originally they were not

i've had them in non-martini glasses

go ahead and get them augmented. a man likes to be able to feel some jigglyness when he reaches up there.

a.) They lose their jiggability when they get augmented.
b.) How tall are you?

when he reaches up there

More like how old are you amirite?

they don't lose that much jiggability, although that depends on if they are saline or silicone.

I've had Manhattans in non-martini glasses as well (rocks glasses, highball glasses, etc.)

xpost

also, the history of a "martini" and what denotes one is similar to the lore of "cocktail."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manhattan_%28cocktail%29

A Manhattan is also frequently served on the rocks in an old-fashioned glass (lowball glass).

I wonder if they will serve me a beer in a martini glass if I ask for a beertini.

-- nickalicious, Monday, October 15, 2007 3:26 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

LOL
i will drink anything as long as it is not sweet
maybe v slightly sweet but only v slightly, as flavour

anyway

http://www.kirurgia.ee/global/breast1.jpg

least sexy boobs ever

I don't understand how you can have a martini without the olive. I like about a dozen olives in there.

Ditto for martini without The Gin.

I try to sit at the bar and fish extra olives out of the garnish tray when the bartender isn't busy. Helps if you know the bartender.

Someone, a friend, soaked a whole bunch of lychees in vodka for two weeks.......NOM and extra dranked after like ten of them!

dateline worthy: if luna had scammed people out of money via a fake internet persona in order to afford fake breasts.

Can you still lactate after fake boobage?

Well, not you specifically, but the augmented being?

That should certainly be googleable data. I'm on it.

I'm sure you can, if based only on rrrobyn's diagrams

depends on where they make the incision

I thought generally speaking the answer was no? But that you don't know until you get pregnant and try it -- I guess the...severing? disruption? (or conversely, preservation) of the milk ducts isn't an exact science.

Go figure, something invasive and (mostly) unnecessary that is solely performed on women isn't particularly well researched for the drawbacks that don't affect the patient's supposed sex appeal.

xp ahh, thanks, Beth. Does that come with a gin martini?

If the nerves around the areola were not cut or damaged during surgery, you may be able to nurse fully or partially. Nerves are vital to breastfeeding since they trigger the brain to release prolactin and oxytocin, two hormones that affect milk production. Your chances of breastfeeding also improve if your milk duct system is intact.

Oh god, there's reasons beyond suckling I wouldn't want nerve nippular damage.

thx for the research Beth!

I always think "What if that lady in Grapes of Wrath had a boob job? Would she have been able to breastfeed that man to keep him alive still? Or would the most jaw-dropping moment in all of high school English be the ending of 'The Necklace' instead?"

It's like a pornographic "Gift of the Magi": she gets implants to make herself more desirable, thereby increasing her chances of getting hitched and/or pregnant...and then can't save a member of the set she was trying to attract.

The GRAPES of wrath indeed

(you see the milk glands are all bunched up like widdle grapey wapes, or bindles of chicken fat.)

Out of desperation I once tried to cream my coffee with my own breast milk. Took about a cup to do the job. That stuff may be sweet but it's way nonfat.

I don't believe you.

I mean I am militant about milk in coffee and also unusually hippie-ish in my feelings about bodily fluids but I don't think my own breastmilk would be an option. For me.

It's true. I nursed my kids for 4 years straight, so I had a ready supply.

You'd do it too, if you got up and there was no freaking milk for the coffee.

xp What, in the freezer?

in her breasts!

yep, time to go home

also lol "nippular"

wow. i prefer half & half in my coffee, do i even want to ask what the diy equal of that would be?

Gallons. Whole tittiesful.

On the bright side, you don't have to add sugar.

Or colostrum.

I conveyed the milk directly from glandular structure into coffee cup, by means of a rolling thumb/index finger action.

I hate it when there's no colostrum in the morning.

Wow I really do not want to write my resume.

Wow I really do not want to write my resume.

-- Laurel, Tuesday, October 16, 2007 9:02 PM (Tuesday, October 16, 2007 9:02 PM) Bookmark Link

hi dere, wait until you have to write cover letters.

Oh, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to give my resume to people I know at various publishing houses and let THEM rep me. At least that's the plan.

i'm thinking about bagging the european tour and getting out of chicago for the winter. if i don't land something quick there's really no reason to stay here.

but that's for another time, back to titties and coffee.

If you get a firm enough implant you should be able to set your coffee cup right up there, no problem.

Or even implants, plural.

yes, that is what everyone wants in a breast

We all need extra storage space.

My kitchen is woefully lacking in counter space. The implant option makes a lot of sense.

If you get a firm enough implant you should be able to set your coffee cup right up there, no problem.

anyone remember those stretch armstrong dolls from the 70s? maybe you could get implants made out of that stuff?

You could mold actual cupholders! A chest console!

i keep reading implant as eggplant

They're very similar.

You could mold actual cupholders! A chest console!

that's exactly what i was thinking.

spare change, beat-up old ipod, loose cigarettes...

Gives a whole new meaning to "cup-size."

I'm a 36 Venti.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/a/ae/GC_A_Place_For_My_Stuff.jpg/200px-GC_A_Place_For_My_Stuff.jpg

ILX: A storm in a C-cup

HA

lol, laurel told deeznuts off for being an ass on the tits thread.