My Child is a Genius: a thread where we document our children's attempts at self-expression

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a pictorial series by Veronica (age 5) in which Poison Ivy starts some shit and then Wonder Woman and Batgirl show up and I dunno what happens exactly but LOL
http://www.flickr.com/photos/princessparkle/8727132456/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/princessparkle/8727135186/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/princessparkle/8727134168/

four Marxes plus four Obamas plus four Bin Ladens (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 17:22 (ten years ago) link

haha, wow those are pretty impressive actually.
here's my three year old's recent self portrait
https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/488285_10200947270544499_479924352_n.jpg

tylerw, Wednesday, 15 May 2013 17:37 (ten years ago) link

Ace!

Ava's project on Un Lun Dun by China Mieville:

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7282/8743040135_85251fe027_z.jpg

Michael Jones, Thursday, 16 May 2013 09:23 (ten years ago) link

beautiful! do you guys generally keep these things around or toss them at some point? i always think "we need to archive these" and then within two days we have piles and piles of junk around the house. i guess taking a pic and storing it digitally might just be the best solution...

tylerw, Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:09 (ten years ago) link

we toss a lot of stuff she brings home from day care because i assume the teachers did the bulk of the work on it anyways

congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:04 (ten years ago) link

my wife diligently goes through anything my daughter draws and takes pictures of anything notable. even so, stuff piles up. this is what happens when your kid draws/colors for like 2 hrs every day lol

four Marxes plus four Obamas plus four Bin Ladens (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:21 (ten years ago) link

yeah my mom saved probably like 1/20 of things i did in school and it is still tons of stuff. not sure if i really *need* it in my life...i just need the greatest hits, you know?

tylerw, Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:26 (ten years ago) link

"hey daddy."

"what?"

"old balls."

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Sunday, 19 May 2013 20:49 (ten years ago) link

otm

ḉrut (crüt), Sunday, 19 May 2013 21:15 (ten years ago) link

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y161/MarkGrout/ALiceBusk_zps006f70bf.jpg

Alice, a self-portrait.

Mark G, Tuesday, 21 May 2013 13:04 (ten years ago) link

two weeks pass...

"there"? "babys"? Kid, go to your room.

(More homework fun with the 6yo).

http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3676/9000854278_186f3d0965_z.jpg

Michael Jones, Monday, 10 June 2013 14:13 (ten years ago) link

Oops. I meant "their?" Ok, kid, we all make mistakes.

Michael Jones, Monday, 10 June 2013 14:14 (ten years ago) link

This is what they made me for Father's Day (Pam's iPhone snap, the irony):

http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3751/9054689603_b7d994d4ea_z.jpg

Michael Jones, Monday, 17 June 2013 11:13 (ten years ago) link

K has started to put together what sound like sentences but are semi-nonsensical, like she's just imitating the rhythm of talking, but using mostly real words. They're usually in Hebrew, but they roughly translate to things like "Mom this walking" "Dad this walking" "Stroller we eat this" etc.

i don't even have an internet (Hurting 2), Monday, 17 June 2013 14:12 (ten years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Beatrice has written and illustrated two books! I've been meaning to scan them so ill put one up sometime soon

educate yourself to this reality (sunny successor), Thursday, 4 July 2013 04:30 (ten years ago) link

four weeks pass...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/ScreenShot2013-08-01at123711PM_zpsf53cf1f2.png

our little guy drew this one at 21 months, which he described as "mama holding you" (you meaning "me"). it almost makes me cry tbh.

christmas candy bar (al leong), Thursday, 1 August 2013 19:40 (ten years ago) link

wow that's amazing

congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 1 August 2013 20:30 (ten years ago) link

aw that is great

tylerw, Thursday, 1 August 2013 20:32 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

family portrait

https://scontent-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/q79/s720x720/1233486_10201984723284152_1428285571_n.jpg

she said "i'm a chip" so i don't know what that means. maybe that she accidentally drew her head as a misshapen oval instead of a circle.

congratulations (n/a), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 16:45 (ten years ago) link

lol hueg weiner

what's up ugly girls? (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 17:46 (ten years ago) link

hahaha

"Max's Original Starship" Vol. 3 (sunny successor), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 19:03 (ten years ago) link

n/a did someone tell her shes a chip off the ol' block maybe?

"Max's Original Starship" Vol. 3 (sunny successor), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 19:03 (ten years ago) link

:( i didn't see the hueg weiner until now and now i can't unsee it :(

congratulations (n/a), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 20:13 (ten years ago) link

sorry

what's up ugly girls? (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 17 September 2013 20:29 (ten years ago) link

some recent chalk art.
https://scontent-b-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1240311_10202078527185208_1831922185_n.jpg

tylerw, Thursday, 26 September 2013 21:56 (ten years ago) link

seven months pass...

JAIL

PLATYPUS OF DOOM (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 2 May 2014 22:04 (nine years ago) link

BEES GO THERE

PLATYPUS OF DOOM (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 2 May 2014 22:04 (nine years ago) link

two months pass...

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Madchen, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 00:53 (nine years ago) link

A+ what are the MaMMIIs saying bottom left?

dem bow dem bow need calcium (seandalai), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 02:09 (nine years ago) link

awesome!

a biscuit/donut hybrid called “bisnuts” (stevie), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 06:34 (nine years ago) link

the mummies are thinking "what if this happened?" I think the rest are diagrams of the mummification process

Οὖτις, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 16:15 (nine years ago) link

thats so great

we've all been kids from time to time (sunny successor), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 20:30 (nine years ago) link

Love this board!!!

*tera, Thursday, 17 July 2014 04:55 (nine years ago) link

Thread I mean...

*tera, Friday, 18 July 2014 10:24 (nine years ago) link

good knowledge of madagascar, I like seeing geographical nous

ogmor, Friday, 18 July 2014 11:00 (nine years ago) link

Ok, ok, I helped her a bit...

https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3896/14608131216_b255dd891f_c.jpg

Michael Jones, Friday, 18 July 2014 13:56 (nine years ago) link

It doesn't fit with the thread's brief of "self-expression" either. Except later when she just drew bunnies all over the newspaper.

Michael Jones, Friday, 18 July 2014 13:56 (nine years ago) link

Oooh, I've got one of these where Abba really surprised me recently by copying the design on my tshirt, but it doesn't turn up well in photographs because it's thin pink crayon on white paper. I'll have to remember to try and scan it in this weekend.

how's life, Friday, 18 July 2014 14:03 (nine years ago) link

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/drawingpad_zps67a72864.jpg

little guy is taking some stabs at spelling ("squeak" and "violin"!) and he likes to draw things like bugs and pigs pouring milk into cups.

LIKE If you are against racism (omar little), Monday, 21 July 2014 17:24 (nine years ago) link

wow that is some awesomely neat lettering. great drawings too.

smoochy-woochy touchy-wouchy, (sunny successor), Tuesday, 22 July 2014 15:40 (nine years ago) link

three months pass...

Pretty! I'd frame that but I'm sappy.

carl agatha, Monday, 17 November 2014 17:21 (nine years ago) link

I did immediately! I'm super sappy :)

*tera, Monday, 17 November 2014 17:50 (nine years ago) link

that's great!

example (crüt), Monday, 17 November 2014 17:52 (nine years ago) link

Thanks! It was a very "Hey I'm a Mommy!" moment for me.

*tera, Monday, 17 November 2014 18:26 (nine years ago) link

ten months pass...

http://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5656/21403384816_a9047769a3.jpg

Οὖτις, Thursday, 17 September 2015 16:09 (eight years ago) link

a couple years old but still

Οὖτις, Thursday, 17 September 2015 16:09 (eight years ago) link

That's pretty dope.

schwantz, Thursday, 17 September 2015 16:12 (eight years ago) link

Hahaha I used to draw almost exactly that way (rockstar/celeb chicks, fat textas) when I was about 10.

I checked Snoops , and it is for real (Trayce), Tuesday, 22 September 2015 06:22 (eight years ago) link

one month passes...

Found this the other day, Veronica gettin some important work done in her room, apparently.

https://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5772/22737921349_94e324ea28_n.jpg

Οὖτις, Thursday, 19 November 2015 18:10 (eight years ago) link

lol

Οὖτις, Thursday, 19 November 2015 19:26 (eight years ago) link

one year passes...

it's the little details in my daughter's drawings, like, you know, the evil-looking taco with a monocle

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C4E0RnaVMAEaubW.jpg

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 16:27 (seven years ago) link

Hahaha

I hear from this arsehole again, he's going in the river (James Morrison), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 21:59 (seven years ago) link

Classic

It's always (sunny successor), Saturday, 11 February 2017 01:21 (seven years ago) link

omg

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 11 February 2017 05:12 (seven years ago) link

King Taco is not amused.

DJI, Saturday, 11 February 2017 05:25 (seven years ago) link

I want a Fancy Lord Taco Esq tshirt please

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 11 February 2017 05:27 (seven years ago) link

Baron Von Tacoschmitt

Οὖτις, Saturday, 11 February 2017 05:40 (seven years ago) link

one month passes...

It is really, really great when someone comes up to our kids and says "Can you sing me a song?" and they start singing Ode to Joy in almost-intelligible German.

Rachel Luther Queen (DJP), Friday, 17 March 2017 14:34 (seven years ago) link

also, I need to take a picture of the latest wall drawing that occurred before we confiscated all of the crayons because... it's kind of compelling

Rachel Luther Queen (DJP), Friday, 17 March 2017 14:41 (seven years ago) link

the other day Veronica had a school assignment to make a book about something so she made a book about ... books. The different parts of a book, what books are for, how to take care of books, different kinds of books, etc.

Οὖτις, Friday, 17 March 2017 15:33 (seven years ago) link

lol @ DJP!!!!

Also "I want a Fancy Lord Taco Esq tshirt please" otm.

the world's little sunbeam (in orbit), Friday, 17 March 2017 15:48 (seven years ago) link

Veronica is so meta.

DJI, Friday, 17 March 2017 16:13 (seven years ago) link

a father's proudest day is when his daughter makes her first piece of Star Trek TOS fan art

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C7Pgvu7VwAAMiyB.jpg

Οὖτις, Monday, 20 March 2017 17:52 (seven years ago) link

Really cool figure drawing!

DJI, Monday, 20 March 2017 18:28 (seven years ago) link

My two-and-three-quarter-year-old has begun punning and making up jokes. Sample quips:

[We pass some tulips]
"I have tulips, daddy. [points to mouth] On my face!"

[Partner is telling her story of how, before we owned them, our cats were strays rescued from a nearby car park.]
"No mummy - they were rescued in a cat park!"

[She's having toast for breakfast]
Partner: "We need to go to the post office, to post these letters."
Marin: "We could post them in the toast office!"

I mean, okay, that's not "genius", but.

Dysphagia Nutrition Solutions (stevie), Wednesday, 22 March 2017 16:14 (seven years ago) link

sounds pretty genius to me

niels, Wednesday, 22 March 2017 16:53 (seven years ago) link

MSM decided to make her own homework the other evening. Took a blank piece of paper, wrote out the instructions, wrote out some examples of how to do it, then did it, on the other side of the paper. I guess the assigned homework was unsatisfying, like Monday/Tuesday crossword puzzles

Not the real Tombot (El Tomboto), Wednesday, 22 March 2017 18:30 (seven years ago) link

two months pass...

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/a78vv0csp40rhad/IMG_6502.jpg

to me this is a fairly obvious reworking of picasso's "las meninas" series of paintings, for example

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/6dfp38mepesnpyl/f32674a94700096de2e9b1f76c8827b9.jpg

which of course were in turn versions of the velasquez painting:

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/21szybsc0ra0cs7/velazquez.meninas.jpg

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 12 June 2017 07:22 (six years ago) link

I believe your child is a genius

niels, Monday, 12 June 2017 08:21 (six years ago) link

thank you

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 12 June 2017 08:41 (six years ago) link

agreed!

It's always (sunny successor), Tuesday, 13 June 2017 13:53 (six years ago) link

to be clear he did not paint the last two

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 13 June 2017 13:56 (six years ago) link

oh hahaha I really though he did the second last one. Yay for my BFA.

It's always (sunny successor), Tuesday, 13 June 2017 14:05 (six years ago) link

it's an understandable mistake to make, because my child is a genius

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 13 June 2017 15:11 (six years ago) link

three weeks pass...

there's been a bunch of stop motion movies and bread making and art at camp this summer but my favorite thing lately is this perfect band logo she wrote on our kitchen whiteboard

http://i.imgur.com/xmVT3Zl.jpg

El Tomboto, Sunday, 9 July 2017 02:42 (six years ago) link

THE DERPS!!!!

Right column Leftist (sunny successor), Friday, 14 July 2017 02:48 (six years ago) link

also look who's learned how to use powerpoint

http://imgur.com/7o6TcDV

El Tomboto, Monday, 17 July 2017 19:07 (six years ago) link

imgrrrr

http://i.imgur.com/7o6TcDV.png

El Tomboto, Monday, 17 July 2017 19:08 (six years ago) link

four months pass...

Ben made a new track: https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/unravel

DJI, Friday, 17 November 2017 16:22 (six years ago) link

eleven months pass...

Ben made another one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KC-_C8RKf38

DJI, Saturday, 27 October 2018 17:06 (five years ago) link

one year passes...

A couple more Circuit tracks from Ben:
https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/glide
https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/glide-part-ii

DJI, Thursday, 12 December 2019 19:21 (four years ago) link

four months pass...

This week Ben made this wild track in Ableton:

https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/void

There’s enough material in there for like 4-5 tracks!

DJI, Sunday, 26 April 2020 04:11 (three years ago) link

two weeks pass...

And another. This one is really pretty.

https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/dune

DJI, Thursday, 14 May 2020 00:13 (three years ago) link

two months pass...

And another one. This is a little chillstep/ambient-ish:
https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/dreamscape

DJI, Thursday, 16 July 2020 20:13 (three years ago) link

three months pass...

Owen has been getting into 80s metal. Here he is trying out the pedal I got him for his birthday:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQYl9uqmc0I

DJI, Wednesday, 11 November 2020 03:38 (three years ago) link

Wow! But... think of the neighbours!

Michael Jones, Wednesday, 11 November 2020 12:09 (three years ago) link

i take it the mask is a homage to agata from melt banana

koogs, Wednesday, 11 November 2020 15:10 (three years ago) link

In San Francisco we wear masks in our own houses. 🤣

DJI, Wednesday, 11 November 2020 16:41 (three years ago) link

this kind of goes in the darnedest things thread, but kinda here too. check this out. one of my kids is 9 years old. as we're biking towards the river to get a special lunch today (his class has to quarantine this week - but he's not at risk since he was already quarantining for the previous two weeks as a result of a trip to egypt with his grandmother!) he says this:

"daddy, if they could make everyone live forever... then money would be worth a lot more, right?"

i'm like.... wtf. i.. yes? i think?

"because people would need way more of it, because their lives would be so long. but there would be the same amount of money"

fuckin shit, i think that's right! kind of??

"so then everything would cost less"

i'm losing you, i've always been terrible at this stuff

"so we could buy a computer for like £100"

basically my son is a 9 year old economics genius who is going to figure out how we can all live forever and get computers for £100 each

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 18 November 2020 17:27 (three years ago) link

Best part about 500 year lifespan? £100 computers!

DJI, Wednesday, 18 November 2020 17:41 (three years ago) link

one pound for every five years is a tough average

Four Seasons Total Manscaping (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 18 November 2020 19:27 (three years ago) link

one month passes...

Ben made another soundtrack-ish composition:
https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/horizon

DJI, Saturday, 2 January 2021 22:45 (three years ago) link

two weeks pass...

7yo daughter, on being told she couldn't have a telescope fish as a pet as they're a high-pressure deep sea fish and various other reasons, so she made her own, called 'Boggles'. pic.twitter.com/v3vnyGPya6

— Caustic Cover Critic 📚 (@Unwise_Trousers) January 20, 2021


My daughter made a nightmare fish

Tsar Bombadil (James Morrison), Wednesday, 20 January 2021 07:26 (three years ago) link

A+++

Madchen, Wednesday, 20 January 2021 08:43 (three years ago) link

Amazing!

Ray Cooney as "Crotch" (stevie), Wednesday, 20 January 2021 13:18 (three years ago) link

V cool

DJI, Wednesday, 20 January 2021 15:58 (three years ago) link

love it

the serious avant-garde universalist right now (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 20 January 2021 16:06 (three years ago) link

one month passes...

Owen with some shredding:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nroBCI13KAI

DJI, Saturday, 6 March 2021 23:39 (three years ago) link

I’ve been terribly lax contributing here for their early years, but since these kids are parented by two ilxors, they are sort of your kids too. They are 13 and 10 now, and without grasping their full provenance, they decided to cover the Strokes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccqW1M6LkUA

Kim, Tuesday, 16 March 2021 17:51 (three years ago) link

excellent!

na (NA), Tuesday, 16 March 2021 18:09 (three years ago) link

also excellent to owen!

na (NA), Tuesday, 16 March 2021 18:10 (three years ago) link

Kim - that is so great! I wish I could get my boys to play together. They are a bit too arguey these days to make that happen.

DJI, Tuesday, 16 March 2021 18:57 (three years ago) link

Ha! Yes, it’s a real struggle. They both like very different things and were just playing over each other and, just tired of the racket I said either play something together, or take turns, and that little magic moment was the result. Time will tell if it ever happens again.

Owen has some real skills!

Kim, Tuesday, 16 March 2021 19:13 (three years ago) link

good kids all round

G.A.G.S. (Gophers Against Getting Stuffed) (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 16 March 2021 21:18 (three years ago) link

four weeks pass...

Ben made another one of his evolving videogame-soundtracky pieces:
https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/glass

DJI, Tuesday, 13 April 2021 15:26 (three years ago) link

Aw, nice!

Michael Jones, Tuesday, 13 April 2021 16:51 (three years ago) link

Beautiful! Love the banger buildup at a minute-and-a-half

Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 14 April 2021 09:33 (three years ago) link

my son just told me a great name for a locksmith would be “sure lock homes”

he swears he made this up himself

Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Saturday, 24 April 2021 15:54 (two years ago) link

Ok now he just made a trance banger (with chill coda): https://soundcloud.com/user-351496707/rain

DJI, Wednesday, 28 April 2021 00:50 (two years ago) link

three months pass...

Ok, not my kid, but our bass player’s daughter wrote a great modern protest song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HO_b2iZxt08

DJI, Thursday, 12 August 2021 21:50 (two years ago) link

oh wow!

kinder, Thursday, 12 August 2021 22:51 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

Ben has been toiling away for years making Geometry Dash levels, of varying levels of quality. Finally, this week, he got one rated (which means it will be seen by way more people), and he's already had thousands of people play it!

https://i.imgur.com/nZ4auQ8.jpeg

DJI, Saturday, 2 October 2021 15:21 (two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Pulled Angel Dust out of the rack to find it contained the drawing Marin did after I taught her how to sing Epic a couple of years ago pic.twitter.com/cIVOca3YZQ

— Stevie Chick (@stevie_chick) October 20, 2021

Apparently that's me on the left

it's it, what is it

Critique of the Goth Programme (Neil S), Thursday, 21 October 2021 09:28 (two years ago) link

amazing

b-b-but surely Epic is on The Real Thing

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 21 October 2021 10:12 (two years ago) link

Haha yes of course but I don't have The Real Thing on vinyl!

ok i'll allow it

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 21 October 2021 10:24 (two years ago) link

it
it
it it it it
it it it it
it it it it
it
////////

When Young Sheldon began to rap (forksclovetofu), Sunday, 24 October 2021 15:19 (two years ago) link


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