Great Real Names

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Coco Crisp
Samantha Bond
David Duchovny, but only because it fits with "why won't you love me" in that song

Among ilxen, Ned and Matos and Martin and Lara have damn cool names, and if I'm remembering Ally's full name correctly, she sounds like a Barbara Stanwyck character.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:31 (10 years ago) Permalink

Zinedine Zidane.

― James Ball (James Ball), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:40 (10 years ago) Permalink

Wubbo Ockels = first dutchman in space

ps he is a dick

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 24 April 2003 07:37 (10 years ago) Permalink

posting this anonymously as these people might just google sometime

anyway.. i used to work for a multinational company which had a searchable online name and address book. So we used to have office competitions to find the best names..

So. here we go with some of the best (and these are real employees)

Nick Sex
Shirley Shallow
Tory S Gaylord
Ricardo Cunto
Eduardo Bastardo
Eric Cartman
Mindy Smelkinson

there were loads more but i can't remember them right now...

― A Nonymous (Jack Battery-Pack), Thursday, 24 April 2003 08:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, Lord Dunsany

He was a great authour, too.

― fletrejet, Thursday, 24 April 2003 10:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

I knew a dude once named Ziad Ziady. Also, my step-sister's freshman-year roommate in college was supposed to be someone named Ojabberin Zayden Powpack, but she never showed.

― hstencil, Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

As for bad names, a guy in my office just named his new son Laws0n K1ncade H3adl3y. Blech! So snobby sounding!

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

Come on down top Ukranian footballer, Semen Semenko

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

There's a lawyers office I came across once when I was lost (wrong bus route) the partners' names were Hartless and Rich.

― Anna (Anna), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:50 (10 years ago) Permalink

Spanish teacher at my middle school = AN1TA D1CK. Her husband's name = H4RRY D1CK. I. SHIT. YOU. NOT.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:51 (10 years ago) Permalink

God Shamgod
Lucky Smalls works where I do...haven't met him.

― buttch (Oops), Thursday, 24 April 2003 13:48 (10 years ago) Permalink

There's a hockey player named Miroslav Satan.

Not as crowd-pleasing perhaps, but there's a statue in Madison Square in New York of a man named Roscoe Conkling.

― Nemo (JND), Thursday, 24 April 2003 13:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

Rocco Baldelli

― Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:06 (10 years ago) Permalink

Sometimes I love my job, like yesterday when I registered a student named Bo Ning. Shouldn't laugh, but gotta really...

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:16 (10 years ago) Permalink

At uni, I knew someone named Peter Handler. He didn't even understand why people giggled when they heard his name. He was such a sweet guy, too!

― colette (a2lette), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:18 (10 years ago) Permalink

me.

― martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:22 (10 years ago) Permalink

Rufus Longstockings

-- jess

Oh, and my middle school band director was named Rufus Long.

― martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:23 (10 years ago) Permalink

martin, I like your name!

― hstencil, Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:25 (10 years ago) Permalink

Hmong names are great! Friend of mine student-taught in a school with heavy Hmong population and there was a kid named Bee Lor, who signed his name with a little cartoon bee, and I think actually did go out and learn a few things about bees, ie "bee lore." Also many Hmong kids have English names that are still literal and descriptive: the girl named "Pretty Flower [xx]"

Went to school with a girl who's last name was Sexe (p. "sexy") She was, too.

Geoffrey Stuart Cannon is such a bizarre formal name sometimes I can't really believe it's mine (heh "feeling slightly disconnected from one's own name c/d")

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:26 (10 years ago) Permalink

Oh shit how could I forget. When I was a teenager I had a friend named Pendleton Brewster Wickersham III. Nice kid too. Probably a nice guy by now, but it's been a long time...

― martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:28 (10 years ago) Permalink

and i've always thought the name Raggett was cool. like a Shakespearean vagabond er something.

RAGGETT: "Tell me where's your fancy bread.
I need it for me, and I'm called Ned."

Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, Lord Dunsany

Seconding Fletrjet on both the name and his writing.

Working at a university as I do, I've come across many a mysteriously cool name. Current favorites, with slight non-google alterations (as these are folks I am currently having to bill for late books): the very Thai (I believe) Nar1n Charanvattank1t, the quite Scottish yet somehow naughty 1an Mu1r Duckles and the prime winner, someone I can only guess is from an Arabic/Dutch family of some sort, Azareen Vandervl1et Oloom1.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

he's like the rai beefheart prince!

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

i actually really like the name Martin Skidmore. It sounds noble. Sir Martin Skidmore.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 24 April 2003 15:30 (10 years ago) Permalink

Ransom Williams, an old friend of mine. Sounds like a black detective character in a series of mysery novels.

― Scott Kos (Scott Kos), Thursday, 24 April 2003 16:29 (10 years ago) Permalink

Best with his actual rank/title: Brigadier General Sylavanus Taco Gilbert (recently fired commandant of the US Air Force Academy).

― Hurlothrumbo (hurlothrumbo), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:12 (10 years ago) Permalink

Sorry, make that Sylvanus Taco Gilbert III. Really.

― Hurlothrumbo (hurlothrumbo), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:13 (10 years ago) Permalink

Peter Peters, not sure who he is, but he was the keynote speaker at a Prayer Breakfast round these parts.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:16 (10 years ago) Permalink

Doing some data entry I ran across "Oral Honeycutt"...

― cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:19 (10 years ago) Permalink

I paid $30 for that one time...

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:20 (10 years ago) Permalink

You got ripped off.

― cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:21 (10 years ago) Permalink

I know. But I did get the clap. Sort of an added value thing.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:24 (10 years ago) Permalink

me to thread!

― slutsky (slutsky), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:36 (10 years ago) Permalink

I just saw another one: Dune Combs

Also, I saw a guy named John Hancock, which is not all that unusual, but I wonder if he would make his signature an exact forgery of the founding father of the same name.

― cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 18:13 (10 years ago) Permalink

Thanks Chris and possibly Tep (he might have meant the other martin). Can't say I'm so keen on Skidmore myself, but I'm used to it.

At work today the person who I was given as a sample that would show a particular system error was Mr Doh. I like to imagine that to say his name correctly you have to slap your forehead.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:27 (10 years ago) Permalink

hey Martin, Martin is a cool name regardless of which of us he was talking about. It's a good thing at least one Chris thinks that.

― martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:37 (10 years ago) Permalink

I like your name too, Martin. It's got a nice rhythm to it.

― slutsky (slutsky), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:48 (10 years ago) Permalink

There was a boatbuilding expert on telly today called Brian Labyrinth.

― Matt (Matt), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

old schoolmate: April Blue
friend who blogs: Gwenda Bond

― M Matos (M Matos), Friday, 25 April 2003 06:00 (10 years ago) Permalink

Best Names

i loved that thread, largely because spectra got so into it! :)

― ron (ron), Friday, 25 April 2003 06:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

There was some important politician or someone back in the mid-nineties who was called Tokyo Sexwhale. And more recently, I was looking through my old school's Friends Reunited page searching for someone and I saw this girl from the class of 2000 who was called Jo King.

― Chriddof (Chriddof), Friday, 25 April 2003 11:51 (10 years ago) Permalink

Names of a couple I encountered while data entering:

Mr Dickie & Miss K Titmus

― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 1 May 2003 09:27 (10 years ago) Permalink

sexwhale is pronounced sex - while (with just a hint of the wahl from mark wahlberg) - eh

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Thursday, 1 May 2003 10:00 (10 years ago) Permalink

THere is a Professor Bizzup at Columbia. This produced about 45 minutes straight worth of laughter, of the falling down in the street, unable to breathe kind. "Yo, class, WAAAZZZUP? I'm Professa Bizzup, fo' sheezy..." Oh my god, I'm laughing again.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 1 May 2003 13:19 (10 years ago) Permalink

I hear crazy names all the time, as I work in customer service and sometimes fundraising. One woman was named Eustachia. Like, the canals in your inner ears. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 1 May 2003 13:27 (10 years ago) Permalink

Casper Weinberger

― buttch (Oops), Thursday, 1 May 2003 13:38 (10 years ago) Permalink

ardys outhouse

― kephm, Thursday, 1 May 2003 15:41 (10 years ago) Permalink

Yakima Canutt (John Wayne's longtime stunt double)

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Thursday, 1 May 2003 16:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

I know a Casper Weinberger! He lives down the street from me. My favorite names of people I've met:
Shasta Beasterfield
Kentor Olaveason
Kyke Andel
Fern S. Furniss
Dr. Peppers (my lit prof)
Guy Hatzenbeuhler
Zola Roach
Steve Stevens – I love those echoic names. I understand it when it comes from a woman marrying a man (ie Fern Furniss above), but if the kid's last name is Stevens, why give his the first name of Steve? He's stuck with it for life.

― Fivvy (Fivvy), Thursday, 1 May 2003 17:10 (10 years ago) Permalink

Also I know a Doug Smith, an overly plain name, but his middle name is ZEBULON.

― Fivvy (Fivvy), Thursday, 1 May 2003 17:22 (10 years ago) Permalink

Chriddof, when my family lived in Hong Kong a few years ago, there were these high school kids that had a band called Tokyo Sex Whale. They were pretty good for a high school band.

― Nick A. (Nick A.), Thursday, 1 May 2003 17:24 (10 years ago) Permalink

Skipping 707 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

^^^winner

― kate78, Monday, 18 March 2013 17:56 (2 months ago) Permalink

that is great but I am still very partial to Airwrecka McBride

― Darth Icky (DJP), Monday, 18 March 2013 17:57 (2 months ago) Permalink

LJ Cummings

― mister borges (darraghmac), Friday, 22 March 2013 15:20 (1 month ago) Permalink

Um from here on out I demand that everyone spell my name Airwrecka. TIA.

― go to party leather (ENBB), Saturday, 23 March 2013 01:38 (1 month ago) Permalink

― r|t|c, Saturday, 23 March 2013 01:54 (1 month ago) Permalink

There's this academic researcher named "Kiel Ova." Awesome.

― Poliopolice, Saturday, 23 March 2013 03:23 (1 month ago) Permalink

http://www.discogs.com/buy/Vinyl/Gamelan-Gong-Sekar-Anjar-And-Gend%C3%A8r-Wajang-Quartet-Under-The-Direction-Of-Dr-Mantle-Hood-The-Exotic/94572707?ev=bp_titl

DR. MANTLE HOOD.

― i guess i'd just rather listen to canned heat? (ian), Monday, 25 March 2013 19:09 (1 month ago) Permalink

Martinus Josephus Maria "Tiny" Kox

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiny_Kox

― ProAm Chomsky (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 03:28 (1 month ago) Permalink

Hey I have a Mantle Hood album, actually - Music of the Venerable Dark Cloud. Pretty cool gamelan stuff.

― ProAm Chomsky (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 03:37 (1 month ago) Permalink

d'brickashaw ferguson

― Spottie_Ottie_Dope, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 03:39 (1 month ago) Permalink

constant mews, monash university

― Esteban Buttiérrez (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 28 March 2013 20:44 (1 month ago) Permalink

department of feline studies

― i've a cozy little flat in what is known as old man hat (Hurting 2), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:13 (1 month ago) Permalink

ED BALLS

― the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:18 (1 month ago) Permalink

hee hee

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:19 (1 month ago) Permalink

my boyfriend's boss' fiance is a public defender who was defending a woman whose name appeared on the legal documents as "LA-AH"

and as the story goes, he asked her how the name is pronounced, is it "LAY-uh" or "luh-AH" etc

to which she replied "It's pronounced LADASHAH"

― open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:27 (1 month ago) Permalink

the sad thing is that I've heard that one before

― the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:28 (1 month ago) Permalink

(wah-wah)

― i've a cozy little flat in what is known as old man hat (Hurting 2), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:29 (1 month ago) Permalink

-ah (pronounced "Hyphenia")

― i've a cozy little flat in what is known as old man hat (Hurting 2), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:30 (1 month ago) Permalink

see also: Female (which rhymes with "Emily", apparently)

― the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:30 (1 month ago) Permalink

can i start signing my gov't name "&rew"

― open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:32 (1 month ago) Permalink

yes plz

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:33 (1 month ago) Permalink

i really want to change my name to airwrecka

i can't get over it

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:34 (1 month ago) Permalink

AIWRECKA YOU FACE!

― i've a cozy little flat in what is known as old man hat (Hurting 2), Thursday, 28 March 2013 21:35 (1 month ago) Permalink

my boyfriend's boss' fiance is a public defender who was defending a woman who got a pickle stuck in her cooter

― No, not sinister (Austerity Ponies), Friday, 29 March 2013 13:26 (1 month ago) Permalink

Do place names count?

Whip Ma Whop Ma Gate

― Madchen, Friday, 29 March 2013 14:20 (1 month ago) Permalink

constant mews

oh wow, I've always found Constant Lambert's name pleasing but this is even better

― susuwatari teenage riot (a passing spacecadet), Friday, 29 March 2013 15:59 (1 month ago) Permalink

Melody Drinkwater

http://melodydrinkwater.com

― you're going home in a crispy ambulance (cajunsunday), Friday, 29 March 2013 16:12 (1 month ago) Permalink

my boyfriend's boss' fiance is a public defender who was defending a woman who got a pickle stuck in her cooter

― No, not sinister (Austerity Ponies), Friday, March 29, 2013 9:26 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so shoplifting?

― johnny crunch, Friday, 29 March 2013 16:29 (1 month ago) Permalink

o so there is a snopes entry on that, i took story on good faith from the source but now idk

http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp

― ampersand cooper black (elmo argonaut), Friday, 29 March 2013 16:37 (1 month ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

Barkevious "KeKe" Levon Mingo
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barkevious_Mingo
I am so drafting this guy with my last pick on any team that has IDP

― gr8 tr∞lls i have known (forksclovetofu), Friday, 12 April 2013 21:43 (1 month ago) Permalink

i've heard rumors of a person named luba whose friends call her "lube"

― Pat Finn, Friday, 12 April 2013 21:53 (1 month ago) Permalink

― hoda nkotb (Stevie D(eux)), Friday, 12 April 2013 22:24 (1 month ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

I am at work doing some student data analysis atm. One of the kids is called:

― хуто-хуторянка (ShariVari), Saturday, 4 May 2013 15:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

h/t to sh1p http://www.bizjournals.com/baltimore/blog/morning-edition/2013/05/dick-hug-remembered-as-champion-of.html

― 乒乓, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 12:01 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

lol at ocean plaza.

when i worked in bbc there was a girl who worked there called "media". spelled that way and all.

― Tioc Norris (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 12:03 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

lol what no that is awful

did she at least try and have it pronounced medea...?

― r|t|c, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 12:13 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

no she introduced herself as media. it was seriously weird.

― Tioc Norris (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 12:28 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i like pluralized names, that is a trend i could get behind

did you ever think 'hey, it would be ironic if a serial killer made art using your body parts?'

just me then.

― Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 13:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Ew, graphic media.

― Madchen, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 14:54 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

I liked this piece about "NPR names":
http://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2013/05/why-do-npr-reporters-have-such-great-names/275493/

― jaymc, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 14:59 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

a guy whose actual surname is 'semen'

― the Quim of Bendigo (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 20 May 2013 07:21 (Yesterday) Permalink

New person in our office with surname Van Kuyk pronounced like ... well, yeah.

― Madchen, Monday, 20 May 2013 07:52 (Yesterday) Permalink

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