IM ON UR HOT TAMALE TRAIN BEIN CHAUFFEURED BY LOSS, or So You Think You Can Dance 5 (starts May 21)

it was noticeable a couple times last night that mary hadn't tanned her arm pit commensurately with the rest of her body, and so there was this weird, kind of bluish flash every time she raised her arms above her head.

WAHT? Boxfeet? WAHT

Facial expression wise, not so much feetwise.

also i hated it in that package when someone was going on about how many different facial expressions evan has when imo it is the same one all the damn time!

Lil C does not ramble, he is is just ... aphoristic! I think if any of you find it challenging to listen to him, then you need to take his advice and befriend some of the characteristics of the challenge. That is good advice all around. If anyone is starting a religion and needs someone to phrase ideas in a way that feels rich enough for people to really pore over and extract different varieties of wisdom for, I suggest hiring Lil C as a copywriter.

I mean honestly, I can only find a sorta-transcript out there, but I kinda liked this:

Being out of your comfort zone represents unfamiliarity and darkness. Faced with certain challenges, you have to befriend the characteristics of the challenge. You have to go and see the music, meaning you have to see with your ears. And then there is no darkness. And I saw no darkness with this routine. A lot of dancers forget there's a pocket in music, and you have to get within those instruments...

Yeah, I liked that too, but I can see zoning out on what he said if I had just performed to the point of exhuastion on national TV. Lil C should do a book of krump zen sayings or something - "see with your ears" is totally an eastern aphorism. Next time he could mention how true, honest dancing can be likened to the bright moon in the sky. Choreographers can be likened to a finger. The choreographer can point to the moon's location, but the choreographer is not the moon.

Should we expect Evan to mount a charge of the White Brigade into the final four?

I don't believe of all my expectations and predictions, this is the one that came true. (Well, I pegged Brando as final four too.)

Ughhhhhhh

at least melisser's gone

dancing with evan has become the kiss of death.

oh, Americapaws

if evan wins this thing i'll seriously have to consider suicide or moving to canada

also: last night's program mostly served to demonstrate how last year's group (and those masked dudes from america's best dance crew) are all so much more amazing than this year's crop

seriously, this is some archuleta/kris allen grandmas-creamin' BS

Glad Nigel was able to spare 5 seconds to mention Merce Cunningham. I was hoping they even bring one of his dancers to perform on the results show but that's was probably a pipe dream.

*would bring

the show began with a sad-clown Evan waving bye-bye; I should have stopped there and pretended it was a result

Only 6 weeks 'til Season 6.

six blissful Kasprzak-free weeks before they're back?

People have called Ryan Kasprzak better in technique/choreography, but since Evan has gotten so far, I wonder he would still seem fresh and bring something new to the table in season 6 if he makes it. I definitely felt the difference between siblings Lacey and Benji, and Stanislav/Faina didn't make it far enough to really warrant a comparison.

yeah my guess is better brother won't make it very far cause it took enough to get people psyched about boring brother.

I think if Ryan shows credible examples of the same style without shrugging his shoulders every three seconds, he will win over the people who want to see Evan mutilated by tap shoes.

Michael, you mean that Lacey felt like Schwimmer overload? She definitely had a disadvantage following up her bro who was an enormous personality and probably a better dancer in his style than she is (though she's more versatile I think), which probably magnified any of her shortcomings. But Ameriker didn't seem to mind, certainly not afraid of sibling reprise, since we had back-to-back finales repped by a Schwimmer.

Biggest difference between the Kasprzaks -- at least from a TV standpoint -- is that Baldo Kasprzak seems a lot more outgoing than Aww Shucks Kasprzak and thus likelier speak in multiple sentences at a time. Normally I'd say his telegenic personality would count for a lot among the voting public, but then we're talking about viewers who didn't connect with Janette.

Not only is S6 around the corner, new ABDC starts in a couple weeks. It's like some TV god decreed that not a week will pass without a dance reality program on the air.

i am ok with that, really

I kind of wonder if America was punishing Mia by not voting for Janette.

haha Ryan can serve as a referendum on whether people liked Evan for his dancing or just that quality I can only describe as "virginal"

yes! i think evan is actually getting a lot of votes on the 'aw shucks' factor, which makes me, aw shucks, really fucking sad!

I am not up-to-date with this week but I do think Evan did a more than credible job last week, certainly better than Ade's cha-cha.

(Ade and Melissa were kind of in another world with that cancer dance, though. Wow. My wife bawled through the whole thing.)

oh man, I typed this earlier but I guess I didn't post it: basically my hope here is that the finale will include the kind of demanding head-to-head guys-only routine that will make it near-impossible for anyone to vote for Evan in good conscience. (though I guess it doesn't matter as much in the finale.)

btw I know I'm a week behind but did anyone else lol at bitchy Mia Michaels riding so hard for bitchy LaurieAnn MyAssGotFiredOnMakingTheBand?

they usually do incude a top 2 guys head to head (remember that dueling princes one?). but i don't think it matters. they're gonna have to hope that ade's and melissa's voters defect to brandon or someone else bc i think if any of them go to evan, he will win.

another thing, i loved kayla but now i'm bored by her. if she could only do choreography and never her own solos, i'd like her better. her solos are just... lame.

who?
xpost

She did Jeanine and Brandon's combat war routine and totally got in Jeanine's grill during rehearsals.

The thing about Evan is that he guarantees that I'm going to vote for Brandon no matter what either of them do next week.

yeah, but i think the flip side to that is that none of evan's current voters are gonna defect.

i can't vote.
i feel like a convicted felon or something.

I actually can't tell about Brandon's votership versus Evan's -- he was only ever on the bottom of anything once, right? Hard to remember. I was sort of hoping that vote totals for women turn out to be much higher than voting for guys, but based on previous-season turnouts I guess there's no reason to imagine that.

basically if Evan wins I think they should just cancel the show

btw is that one bigger lady in the audience Kayla's mom?

grandma?
didn't she have a weird sob story?

well the grandparents who raised her were there for most of it -- they were sorta appropriately vague about what was up with her mother -- and now lately there's been a woman in a big black shirt as the Kayla's-family go-to, so...

cool, Kayla's mom likes Big Black

Re: Schwimmers - To me, I felt Lacey was different enough from Benji that it didn't matter so much that they were siblings.

their different sexes probably didn't hurt that

kayla is the tallest person in the final 4

i want to say she's my favorite except she danced to that fucking fray song

thing is, evan is a pretty great dancer, but his face is just terrible

Surprised Ellen didn't call him out on taking "performance enhancing mugs." (cue heavy laughter from the rest of the judges)

@ this point whoever wins we all lose imo

i want to say she's my favorite except she danced to that fucking fray song

Is this better, nza?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-IKuruGQ28

In the event that someone manages to interview (or, at least, ask one question) to judges, Cat, the final four dancers, what questions would you like to have asked?

ask them if they can get tyce fired. i watched the performance show yesterday and was struck again by how terrible his routines are. the going to the chapel one was ridic so formless and pointless. and it didnt really make sense given the context ~~ shouldnt it have been urgent and tense? bah he sux