people that YELP are scumbags

marmite

blood pudding

boke.

I hate all of you.

treacle maybe?

i am ok with treacle except for the fact that it is called treacle

it sounds like something you should patch your roof with.

yelp saleslady has been incessant caller for the last few weeks trying to hip me to the jive re: their god damn website and why my store should give them all my money. pimpin pimpin pimpin

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Protection_racket

http://mashable.com/2009/08/27/yelp-augmented-reality/

thread won't be the same w/o omar ;_;

It was definitely an experience. I mean, where else would the "host" be a big black man with a jacket and hat that both have the word SECURITY written across it? Only at Roscoe's!

http://mashable.com/2009/08/27/yelp-augmented-reality/

Fuck restaurants, imagine if you could just point your iPhone camera at people's genitals and a YELP sexual rating would come up. "Delicious" or "Avoid."

god i wish you could leave insulting comments beneath people's reviews! or at least click a button that would add "people thought this was: what the fuck is this supposed to be even?? (1)" why did you think you needed to write a useless three star review of a chinese restaurant in the character of a malfunctioning robot???

Yeah being able to comment on a review is a functionality that is sorely needed. Amazon implemented it a while back and it adds a lot to the site.

"I don't know if anyone who reviewed, actually was conscious when they went to __________"

been seeing lots of these reviewers lately...if you had a good experience at a restaurant they thought poorly of, they'll just assume you were drunk and/or retarded.

i would consider joining yelp to complain about people's comments

More from the same review:

"After a long wait, the doorman wouldn't let us in, thinking that my friend was "underage", at 23. Then after showing an ID, thought it was fake"

A whole TWO YEARS past drinking age and the doorman didn't immediately recognize that he was of drinking age? For shame. Also I have been to this place a million times, and they don't have a doorman. It's a restaurant with a bar inside, they only check your ID if you buy a drink/hookah.

And then the last part of the review is basically "omg belly dancers started dancing!", which is the equivalent of going to a bar with a stage and then freaking out because a band starts playing live music.

Also the guy's name is "Mace"

why did you think you needed to write a useless three star review of a chinese restaurant in the character of a malfunctioning robot???

The Pitchfork'idization of online food reviews.

can't even quantify how primal my anger is at that fuckin comment max posted

destroy anyone who talks any kind of shit at all about roscoe's imo

scumbags gotta eat

I wrote my first yelp review (a complainy one) today, but only because the customer service I had from somewhere was so incredibly bad I thought people needed to know. Their only other review was poor as well. Of course the owner wrote me about five minutes after it went up to complain to me about it, and I was like, "you're certainly faster to respond to negative online reviews than you are responding to the multiple emails I sent you over the past three months about the status of my shit".

dude there are probably other places you can just go to if you want cheese fries so bad

yes, but it was a place I sent my camera for repair, so it was a bit different.

sending your camera in for repair at a cheese fries place was probably your first mistake

people that REPAIR cameras are scumbags

The barkeep took my order. I opted for the first thing on the menu - three eggs, sausage, potatoes, toast.

"How do you want your eggs?"

"Basted."

"What? Pasted? You mean scrambled?"

"Nope. Basted. Up and done. Sunny side up. Whites done, yolks runny."

"What was that you called 'em?"

"Basted. B-A-S-T-E-D. Some cooks use a little water and a small lid. Others splash grease. Basted. Steamed. Like that."

"I'll tell the chef."

He paid attention to me. I like that.

Brunch at Cheryl's includes a Bloody Mary and coffee. The drink was robust - aromatic celery, black (I think) pepper, horseradishy heat, big on the booze, three nice green olives skewered and spanned rim to rim. Great coffee, too.

I sipped the drink. I slurped the coffee.

And I sipped.

And I slurped.

Sip.

Slurp.

Sip.

Slurp.

Barkeep asked, "Your order come out?"

"Nope."

"I'll check." He ducked into the kitchen, came right back. "Order's on it's way, sir. Would you like another drink? No? You sure? It's on me."

I had other things to do that day besides pass out, topple over and fart.

"No thanks. I'm fine."

He apologized again for the delay. But I didn't mind. Really. Well, maybe a little. But not enough to do anything about it.

Two minutes later he apologized again.

A half-minute after that someone slid the plate in front of me. My eyes got big. 'Oh,' I thought. 'This'll do!'

Nothing satisfies like a traditional American breakfast, that's what I say, and I had satisfaction promised and plated right there before me. Although the egg whites weren't completely set - just a little albumen snot left uncongealed - I pushed off thoughts of Salmonella and dug right in.

The eggs: Rich orange yolk. Needed a little salt, though. Pepper would've been nice, too - damn near essential, I think - but all I saw was shaker stuff. I dumped a little into my palm, whiffed. Yup, that's what I figured: Ground so long ago its peppery pungency had passed. Oh, well.

jesus

people that REPAIR cameras are scumbags

― Alex in SF, Thursday, September 17, 2009 4:49 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark

Not true. When I get my Lynx 14 repaired I'm going to be so grateful to tiny Japanese dude in Georgia who did it.

Unless, you know, you're telling a joke.

whiney post could rightly be polled

someone wants to be writing a hard-boiled detective novel eh?

it's like the beautiful eastern european small boobs wife thank you how delicious guy of yelp

Whiney post must be a joke.

nah dude
http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=8SFMInrsguCSuaznnqI0PQ

"0 Friends"

and his first review did not indicate what was to come:

"Great food, generous portions, inattentive waitstaff."

They seem to be getting longer and longer.

his el greco diner one is grate

http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/v226/761/1/n293700085_1991.jpg

http://static1.px.yelp.com/static/20091022/i/new/ico/stars/stars_map.png

lol that didn't work right

yelp party photos are pretty hilarious imo

i meant to post something here a couple weeks ago and now i can't find it. not even sure it was actually yelp.

someone wrote on a review of an ethiopian restaurant "i thought i would like this because i have had nigerian food and really enjoyed it." lol :(

sounds like yelp to me : /

After repeatedly telling friends I didn't want to celebrate my birthday... I crawled out from under my rock and met them out for an impromptu drink anyway. Liquid Kitty and bartender Damien... thanks for getting celebrations off to a merciless start. The low lighting, loud music, vintage porn, friendly bartenders and drink specials...

Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday extreme specials:

$3 Low Lifes = well shot and PBR
$5 medium cocktails... what ever that means
$2 PBR

- friendly locals bar
- metered street parking free after 6pm
- great specials, strong drinks
- wide range of specialty cocktails
- dark bar... did I mention loud?
- there's a back table available for a group of 15 or so
- bar was at 70% capacity on a Tuesday night, with 2 booths or so left. Start here then move else where.

Well, 27 better show me something .... or I will destroy it. Wait. What...

I need 4 advils... stat.

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what ever that means

jesus christ

http://valleywag.gawker.com/5397344/yelp%20fight-participant-i-was-trying-to-apologize

Has there already been a Yelp-centered Law & Order episode?

fwiw that lady just spent 3 days jail on 5150 watch. she is 1000% cuckoo, she used to have a bookstore in west portal that i went to once... seriously bonkers.

Has there already been a Yelp-centered Law & Order episode?

― Elvis Telecom, Thursday, November 5, 2009 3:20 AM (9 hours ago) Bookmark

kind of! but it was like yelp+4chan+redstate. +schizophrenia iirc