yeah, mitchell! lmbo
― the shitbirdification of america's youth (cankles), Friday, 24 July 2009 04:31 (fourteen years ago) link
what i like about white is that he's so far off in the wilderness, ranting away in whatever's left of the new york press, that he's easy to forget about until somebody does something like revive this thread. but whenever you happen to tune in, he's right there as crazy as always, getting crazier all the time. like a mad preacher on some staticky AM station you occasionally run across at 2 in the morning.
― flying squid attack (tipsy mothra), Friday, 24 July 2009 04:50 (fourteen years ago) link
(and get tired of as soon as the novelty wears off again)
Really, he's most amusing when two competing sensibilities jerk knees at the same time. Like Redacted, pitting his love for De Palma against his love for Dubya's war in Iraq.
― sir-mounter (Eric H.), Friday, 24 July 2009 04:55 (fourteen years ago) link
haha yes, or when demme casts denzel/altman uses digital video/etc
p.s.
G.I. Joe’s in the same innocuous class as the Laura Croft and Thunderbirds movies. It has the spirit of Saturday Afternoon toy commercials, even to the extent of extolling basic American values: the very realistic appreciation of militarism as a foundation for capitalist freedom that supplies delight in both G.I. Joe and Transformers 2. There’s more realpolitik here than in the now-overrated The Hurt Locker.*
Sommers isn’t quite in Michael Bay’s directorial class, but he has the ability to envision a nightmare and spin it into a provocative coup the Surrealists wouldn’t dare.
not sure what this means:
This Eiffel Tower image also recalls the postmodern epigraph that closes Godard’s In Praise of Love : “I will go to my grave with more visions than man has previously ever known.” The trashy secret of G.I. Joe is its ironic capitalizing on the fact that awesome, dread-filled visions don’t necessarily destroy childhood innocence. Seeing the Eiffel Tower fall is part of loving it (which could not be said of the World Trade Center). The Brothers Grimm understood. That’s why people are queuing-up, contributing to the Jackpot.
http://nypress.com/article-20189-gi-joe-the-rise-of-cobra.html
*btw he previously said, "Kathryn Bigelow's latest joins the short list of great Iraq War films" but i guess that was before everyone else started praising it, so now he has to back off lest he be forced to agree with others.
― omar little, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 19:22 (fourteen years ago) link
thanking youuuu
― Obama Death Panel (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 19:26 (fourteen years ago) link
I'm trying to remember the Armond White review I was anticipating, but I can't now.
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:38 (fourteen years ago) link
Oh wait it was his GI Joe review. I will have to savor this now.
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:39 (fourteen years ago) link
the "now-overrated" hooooo boy
― chesty la roux (donna rouge), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:40 (fourteen years ago) link
"As for acting, operatives Tatum and Wayans look great in their special Accelerator suits, surging through the air, tumbling and weaving in dreamlike acrobatics to gladden the wide-eyed part of your aesthetic sensibility."
Yes, acting.
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:42 (fourteen years ago) link
Wait there is no talk of acting in that sentence?!?! WTF?
they're not actors, they're OPERATIVES
― Obama Death Panel (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:42 (fourteen years ago) link
marvel at their operations
can't spell operative without opera and this film is pop opera at its finest. steven spielberg would be proud.
― omar little, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:43 (fourteen years ago) link
white is clearly stating sommers uses actors like bresson
― velko, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:44 (fourteen years ago) link
I like when Armond White writes in second person.
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:44 (fourteen years ago) link
crossposting from the gi joe thead cause dammit this took like 5 minutes:
complete list of other films armond cites in this review:
iron manstar trekharry potter 6 ("and the half-blooded chintz"--good one dude!)the mummytransformers 2wanted3:10 to yumadrag me to helltransporter 3torque (those last two are "superior pop art")the laura (sic) croft filmsthunderbirdsthe hurt locker ("now overrated")united 93cloverfieldmars attacksin praise of love
― wishes to be referred under the pseudonym of kronos (call all destroyer), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:44 (fourteen years ago) link
One of these things is not like the other. . .
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:45 (fourteen years ago) link
Can someone do a complete list of the critics that Armond is citing? Guessing that would be longer.
― Alex in SF, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 20:47 (fourteen years ago) link
"This Eiffel Tower image also recalls the postmodern epigraph that closes Godard’s In Praise of Love : 'I will go to my grave with more visions than man has previously ever known." Uh huh.
― if i have a child i will name it satan (latebloomer), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 21:02 (fourteen years ago) link
will gladden
― sir-mounter (Eric H.), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 22:13 (fourteen years ago) link
at this point is he doing this just to see if anyone's still reading?
― flying squid attack (tipsy mothra), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 22:15 (fourteen years ago) link
Meh, he's the only critic I remember what he thinks of any given movie more than a few weeks after it opens. Granted, it's because he's predictable, but still ...
― sir-mounter (Eric H.), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 22:49 (fourteen years ago) link
but i mean, throwing that godard quote in there, it's just trolling really. who does he think his audience is, besides people who tune in to watch him be crazy?
― flying squid attack (tipsy mothra), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 23:51 (fourteen years ago) link
he's the glenn beck of film critics
― Obama Death Panel (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 23:53 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah, Mars Attacks is the great one.
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 01:04 (fourteen years ago) link
Isn't Will Gladden the third string QB for the Seahawks?
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 12 August 2009 01:24 (fourteen years ago) link
the very realistic appreciation of militarism as a foundation for capitalist freedom that supplies delight
fuck this sentence, fuck this guy
― heavin' flho (s1ocki), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 01:52 (fourteen years ago) link
"yeah, Mars Attacks is the great one."
I thought you liked the Hurt Locker.
― it's like i have a couple worked up orc dicks under my arms (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:01 (fourteen years ago) link
slocki what part are u objecting 2
― a narwhal done gored my sister nell (cankles), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:06 (fourteen years ago) link
i do, but it's no Mars Attacks! xp
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:08 (fourteen years ago) link
I bet you just like it less now that it's been overrated.
― it's like i have a couple worked up orc dicks under my arms (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:25 (fourteen years ago) link
kinda like the president amirite
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:33 (fourteen years ago) link
heyo
― BIG HOOS's wacky crack variety hour (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 03:38 (fourteen years ago) link
That sentence isn't really all that risible, because I can imagine GI Joe's audience being cool with both guns and money.
― sir-mounter (Eric H.), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 04:02 (fourteen years ago) link
Armond's nuts, cuz i understand there is no one named Joe in that film.
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 04:11 (fourteen years ago) link
― a narwhal done gored my sister nell (cankles), Tuesday, August 11, 2009 11:06 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
i guess the idea that that shit is "innocuous" and awesome... i didnt not take that sentence as a critical read... then again it is really fuckin humid in here
― heavin' flho (s1ocki), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 05:13 (fourteen years ago) link
GI Joe IS innocuous and awesome
― a narwhal done gored my sister nell (cankles), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 05:19 (fourteen years ago) link
YOOOO JOE!
― if i have a child i will name it satan (latebloomer), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 05:34 (fourteen years ago) link
that sentence doesnt really "do" anything critical, it just sort of sits there hoping for you to disagree
― max, Wednesday, 12 August 2009 11:34 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah exactly
― heavin' flho (s1ocki), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 12:54 (fourteen years ago) link
when i first encountered armond i dont think i had ever read a critic whose POV was completely unpredictable to me. i didnt have any idea what he'd say about a movie. he would often come at it in such a way that i was sorta floored--almost having fun with the idea of interpretation itself--that many, many times he forced me to reconsider films i thought i knew/understood from the ground up.
of course, this only worked a few times and once you're on to the trick it kinda loses its power.
― ryan, Wednesday, 12 August 2009 13:21 (fourteen years ago) link
he used to be different, really.
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 12 August 2009 13:33 (fourteen years ago) link
As I read it I kept running into parts i wanted to quote and respond to but I really don't want to waste the time. This wasn't written by a real person it was written by someone living in Michael Bay world.
― Adam Bruneau, Wednesday, 12 August 2009 21:12 (fourteen years ago) link
I probably wouldn't dislike Armond White much at all if he didn't have his bizarre vendettas against successful movies. Like the dude loves to celebrate trash/genre pictures/crowd pleasers, but he can't stomach the occasional schmaltz of a Pixar movie?
― Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 13 August 2009 04:46 (fourteen years ago) link
His vendetta is against critically acclaimed movies though. Whether or not you or me liked or saw a movie means nothing. Did Johnny Critic love it? Oh you bet Armond's gonna contrive a reason to fuckin' hate it.
― it's like i have a couple worked up orc dicks under my arms (Alex in SF), Thursday, 13 August 2009 05:06 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah the next (first?) Pixar movie that critics despise will be Armond's favorite animated film ever.
― Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 13 August 2009 05:14 (fourteen years ago) link
Oh sure. Heck if revisionist critics retroactively decided they hated Up, he'd turn it its biggest booster overnight.
― it's like i have a couple worked up orc dicks under my arms (Alex in SF), Thursday, 13 August 2009 05:25 (fourteen years ago) link
Armond is at his best these days championing commercially invisible filmmakers like Julian Hernandez, who (rounding off) none of you have ever seen or will see.
― Indiana Morbs and the Curse of the Ivy League Chorister (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 13 August 2009 13:20 (fourteen years ago) link
a reason to be excited for Cars 2.
― da croupier, Thursday, 13 August 2009 13:25 (fourteen years ago) link