ILE rolling non-slam Tennis thread

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1st titles of 2008, for reference:

WTA Gold Coast: LI Na d. Victoria AZARENKA 4-6 6-3 6-4
WTA Auckland: Lindsay DAVENPORT d. Aravane REZAÏ 6-2 6-2

ATP Doha: Andy MURRAY d. Stanislas Wawrinka 6-4 4-6 6-2
ATP Adelaide: Michaël LLODRA d. Jarkko NIEMINEN 6-3 6-4
ATP Chennai: Mikhail YOUZHNY d. Rafael NADAL 6-0 6-1

anatol_merklich, Wednesday, 9 January 2008 16:06 (6 years ago) Permalink

go davenport!!

Surmounter, Wednesday, 9 January 2008 16:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

Week 2/2008, with all eyes on the AO anyway:

WTA Sydney: Justine HENIN d. Svetlana KUZNETSOVA 4-6 6-2 6-4
WTA Hobart: Eleni DANIILIDOU walk-over vs Vera ZVONAREVA

ATP Sydney: Dmitry TURSUNOV d. Chris GUCCIONE 7-6(3) 7-6(4)
ATP Auckland: Philipp KOHLSCHREIBER d. Juan Carlos FERRERO 7-6(4) 7-5

anatol_merklich, Monday, 14 January 2008 07:40 (6 years ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

Watching Sharapova vs Obziler in the Israel-Russia Fed Cup tie now, and wow is the crowd noisy! Rapturous cheering on every serve fault by Maria, tauntingly SCREAMING along with her on every shot etc. Umpire totally unable to silence them haha!

anatol_merklich, Saturday, 2 February 2008 12:50 (6 years ago) Permalink

fuck what channel? we need to sign up for the tennis channle, i can't be missing stuff like this

Surmounter, Sunday, 3 February 2008 02:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

I just go to and check whether anything is available ("Live Sports" tab -> "Tennis" button). Note: playing stuff may in general entail installing various Chinese tv apps (sopcast, tvants, uusee...). That particular tie, however, is on some Israeli sports station showing through Windows Media Player or I guess any other .wmv-showing app.

anatol_merklich, Sunday, 3 February 2008 10:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

How useful it is if you're not using Windows I've no idea. Also, quality unsurprisingly varies wildly; this Israeli broadcast is pretty decent.

Pe'er was double-breadsticked by the Shazbot right now, making it 2-1 to Russia. Elsewhere, France vs China will be decided by the doubles.

anatol_merklich, Sunday, 3 February 2008 10:28 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

Murray knocks out Federer in the first round of the Dubai tournament.

nice one you unpatriotic little shit.

Upt0eleven, Monday, 3 March 2008 17:15 (6 years ago) Permalink

he was wearing a saltire cap when he was playing, which doesn't seem desperately unpatriotic to me.

ailsa, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:01 (6 years ago) Permalink

Federer was too busy not thinking about yesterday

Matt, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:05 (6 years ago) Permalink

i was only referring to his disinclination to play davis cup.
and i was kidding about that anyway - i care no more about it than he does.

still, 'unpatriotic' was probably a poor choice of word. well done young man!

Upt0eleven, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:35 (6 years ago) Permalink

It was more the "little shit" that you coupled it with, to be fair.

Anyway, yes, two out of three won against Federer now.

ailsa, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:37 (6 years ago) Permalink

God knows why he'd want to play the Davis Cup. Who else is going to be on the team? I wouldn't want to be winning matches and carrying a team full of useless people in a tournament that has long since lost its cachet and relevance except in the eyes of really, really old tennis commentators.

edwardo, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

x-post take umbrage wherever you like it was all meant in jest, apart from the congratulatory bit. internet does not do deadpan.

But I genuinely like Murray. I also agree with the above post. I can't be arsed to even watch Davis Cup so I can't blame him if he's rather not play in it.

Upt0eleven, Monday, 3 March 2008 22:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

5 months pass...

Andy Murray wins something

Herman G. Neuname, Sunday, 3 August 2008 21:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

He has won about 4-5 career titles before...but yes, its his biggest win

xyzzzz__, Sunday, 3 August 2008 21:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

this is his third title of 2008 alone. by far the biggest though! wish i could've seen it, sounds like a fantastic match, and it's good to see him encroaching on THE TRIVALRY even if i do like nole more (lol the way fed's playing, nadal/djokovic/murray is the real trivalry).

on the WTA, dinara safina has won two big titles in a row! she is the only woman out there who is stepping up to fill the void at the top. jankovic is going to be world no 1 next week, that is embarrassing. the WTA is probably in the worst shape i've ever witnessed.

lex pretend, Sunday, 3 August 2008 22:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

also i didn't know this thread existed!

lex pretend, Sunday, 3 August 2008 22:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

Oh I know he's won stuff before but not a big tourney. It was a good match. He looks so much fitter and stronger than he was a year or 2 ago.

Herman G. Neuname, Sunday, 3 August 2008 23:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

Nadal will be #1 on 18/8. Can't quite believe Fed's slump post-SW19; loss to Simon, near-loss to Ginepri, loss to Karlovic. Thought he might have at least made a fight of the #1 ranking (his form was fine for 18 of 19 matches in Paris, Halle and London); I had this romantic notion of the baton being passed as Fed beat Nadal at Flushing Meadow (Nadal's points surge taking him past the repeating champ despite the loss). Fed will be lucky to get out of the sixteens in NYC. Does Beijing have any ranking points?

Michael Jones, Monday, 4 August 2008 00:04 (6 years ago) Permalink

yeah, it does. i think a few less than a masters event for the dudes, a few more than a tier ii for the chicas.

GOD that feels ridiculous looking at it! thinking about how much the olympics mean to, like, track&fielders and rowers and the like, and in tennis it's like...a TIER II.

anyway in other news, THIS is the 15-year-old saviour of the WTA who in the past month has taken sets from both serena and sweta, michelle larcher de brito:

she makes sharapova sound like a trappist. seriously i can't believe she hasn't been asked to stop that bullshit yet, or like MURDERED ON COURT by a deafened opponent. that's not a grunt, that's a scream with a sustain pedal on. i'm not sure i'm going to be able to actually watch any of her matches.

oh and in other news silliams has pissed on her phone at the beach:
sometimes you just long for the days before celebrities discovered how to work the internet themselves :(

(also note "enuf boring stuff" LIKE TENNIS)

lex pretend, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:19 (6 years ago) Permalink

you know, i used to watch all the nonslams cuz my stepdad taped them. then i didn't speak to him anymore. i wish i knew when they were on -- i think i'm gonna have to get on top of that!

Surmounter, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:20 (6 years ago) Permalink

they're on every week! televised or not is another qn

lex pretend, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:22 (6 years ago) Permalink

exactly, that's the thing.

Surmounter, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:23 (6 years ago) Permalink

10 months pass...

Blake was asked about the partisan crowd before today's final and reminded everyone he's half English :)

BBC giving it "Blake is just happy to be here" bollocks - dude isn't here to make the numbers up. I think I'll be pro-Blake today, as he does things like this

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 13:17 (5 years ago) Permalink

Well done Andy!

ailsa, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:02 (5 years ago) Permalink

Bit of a dull game lit up by a few stunning forehands. Shoddy line calls all day, none of which helped Blake. Well done to Murray on being the first Brit in yonks to win Queen's, which I'm sure won't lead to even more Wimbledon hype.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

I predict Murray will cave under the pressure and be out by round 3.

ailsa, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:09 (5 years ago) Permalink

he doesn't seem to be the sort to cave under pressure. but a friendly first-week draw would certainly be nice...

didn't watch the Queen's, but watched the Edgbaston SFs (Li d. Sharapova and Rybarikova d. Mirza) and a bit of the final today - Magdalena Rybarikova is a real discovery, such a classic grass-court game! Slices and volleys and good serving! she looks weirdly like Samantha Morton, too. i remember seeing a photo of her from her junior days when she lost some random final - she was posing w/the trophy and seriously looked like she was about to go bowling for columbine. so it was lucky for Edgbaston that she won today!

Haas beat Djokovic in the Halle final this week too.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:25 (5 years ago) Permalink

in other news, larcher de screamo gets a wildcard to wimbledon. FUN.

Roz, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:56 (5 years ago) Permalink

The weird transatlantification of Murray's pan loaf accent has meant I can't actually hear what he's saying - it's just a series of droning noises that makes my ears stop working.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:04 (5 years ago) Permalink

pan loaf accent

is that how you talk with your mouth full of bread?

Beth Parker, Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:17 (5 years ago) Permalink

It was once more expensive and regarded as more fashionable than the then more common plain loaf. Hence, to speak with a pan loafy voice is to speak in a posh or affected manner.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:19 (5 years ago) Permalink

How on earth does Murray speak with an affected accent?! He just mumbles.

I found that picture of Rybarikova looking like she's ready to go bowling for Columbine after losing the Wimbledon juniors final!

Fortunately today was more to her liking.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:41 (5 years ago) Permalink

Haas beat Djokovic in the Halle final this week too.

!!! interesting result for sure. fed dropped out?

Lamp, Sunday, 14 June 2009 17:22 (5 years ago) Permalink

yeah...Djokovic was lucky to be in the final at all, he had to come back from 5-7, 2-5 down and save 5 match points against Florent Serra (!) in the 2nd round.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 17:26 (5 years ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...


French tennis player banned for betting found dead

Natural causes apparently.

RIP Mathieu

anatol_merklich, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 15:55 (5 years ago) Permalink

Fuckin' hell. (Though my initial shock was because I thought you meant Paul-Henri Mathieu...)

Michael Jones, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 16:00 (5 years ago) Permalink

Oh right, sorry! To avoid confusion to others: it's Mathieu Montcourt.

anatol_merklich, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 16:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

The Lex's favourite choker, Richard Gasquet avoids getting suspended after testing positive for coke.

The full findings are here (pdf): pretty lol-worthy just for the kissing descriptions and finding out that he was allegedly "contaminated" at a Bob Sinclar event.

Roz, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

hingis should've found a french waiter of her own to blame. or maybe just one of the 9494439 atp players she'd slept with.

lex pretend, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:42 (5 years ago) Permalink

her ban ends in january right? think she'll come back?

Roz, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:03 (5 years ago) Permalink

4 weeks pass...

wtf federer?! 5-2 up in the final set, somehow fails to serve it out twice and then DFs on match point in the tie-break to give Tsonga the win.

all credit to Jo-W for stepping it up right at the end, but still... that was some breakdown.

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:25 (5 years ago) Permalink

5-1 up in the third! :o

at the same time I was watching Flavia Pennetta try to choke away her match - she beat Venus in the last round, and winning this would mean a top 10 debut. 6 match points came and went, double faults on at least two of them, but her opponent was Hantuchova so it was OK in the end.

btw, Serena's post-Wimbledon record = QF loss in Stanford to Stosur and 3R loss in Cincinnati to Bammer, who now owns a 2-0 record over her. The Real Number 1!

am endeavouring to pretend the horrific Clijsters comeback isn't happening. never liked her.

best recent press conference = Marat defending baby sis by telling the press to "go fuck themselves" <3

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

obv didn't see the Fed match but am guessing that J-W just started going even more for broke than usual when down 1-5, and everything began going in.

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:33 (5 years ago) Permalink

yep and suddenly firing aces as well when he hadn't been able to get a good first serve in since like the end of the first set. meanwhile fed's serve just went to pieces after that.

also yay dinara fighting back a break in both sets to beat kimmy. would've hated it if she lost this one.

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:39 (5 years ago) Permalink

best recent press conference = Marat defending baby sis by telling the press to "go fuck themselves" <3

this whole presser was fucking classic.

Q. Now that you stopped, what about coaching her?

MARAT SAFIN: Oh, you want me to hang myself? (laughter.)

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:41 (5 years ago) Permalink

<3 <3 <3

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:43 (5 years ago) Permalink

Wow, Pennetta will be Italy's FIRST EVER top 10 woman! Both Schiavone and, before her, Farina Elia peaked at 11.

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:45 (5 years ago) Permalink

Meanwhile, Andy Murray becomes the first man not named Roger or Rafa to hold a spot in the top two since forever. More importantly, Del Potro beat Roddick.

Michael Jones, Sunday, 16 August 2009 09:25 (5 years ago) Permalink

cibu not heading into the open too well

johnny crunch, Tuesday, 19 August 2014 03:19 (1 month ago) Permalink

Cibulkova went 24-7 from January to April, then she lost that insane match in the KL final to Vekic and since then has gone 5-9.

Yeah, if Ristic hasn't given birth yet then I don't expect Djokovic to snap out of it at the USO.

lex pretend, Tuesday, 19 August 2014 06:36 (1 month ago) Permalink

wow some really terrible line calls in murguruza/peng

johnny crunch, Wednesday, 20 August 2014 20:36 (1 month ago) Permalink

man giorgi is so frustrating

johnny crunch, Friday, 22 August 2014 17:39 (1 month ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

Venus/Lucic is such a special final. Mirjana's first final since Bol 1998. Insane to think they were teen prodigies together.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 September 2014 16:45 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

And a very special outcome. Mirjana!!!

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 September 2014 18:23 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

yesterday's final really got me thinking about how Venus/Mirjana finals should've been one of that generation's finest rivalries. And how their respective families and teams really shaped their talents into such divergent careers. If Mirjana's dad had been the Richard Williams type...

Bencic was absolutely stellar in thrashing Sweta today. She can put that BH exactly where she wants to with such consistency, and she can conjure up angles wt full stretch. FH is much improved, as is the second serve.

lex pretend, Monday, 15 September 2014 09:38 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Also, this tennis handshake happened. BZS, never change

lex pretend, Monday, 15 September 2014 16:11 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

impressive serving from vaidisova in her first comeback match

groovemaaan, Tuesday, 16 September 2014 19:06 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Rumours are swirling that Li is going to retire. NOOOOOOOO!

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Thursday, 18 September 2014 08:07 (1 week ago) Permalink

sad but 100% expected tbh

lex pretend, Thursday, 18 September 2014 08:16 (1 week ago) Permalink

it was in the offing as soon as that chinese academy took carlos back really

lex pretend, Thursday, 18 September 2014 08:17 (1 week ago) Permalink

Vaidisova's temper hasn't changed!

lex pretend, Thursday, 18 September 2014 18:04 (1 week ago) Permalink

Na's retirement confirmed

uxorious gazumping (monotony), Friday, 19 September 2014 03:31 (1 week ago) Permalink

Not surprising but still :(

Roz, Friday, 19 September 2014 04:40 (1 week ago) Permalink

Ashleigh Barty's also retired (or "taken an indefinite hiatus") at just 18. That does come out of the blue, though it's not as if she ever showed a great deal of drive about her career anyway. All those WCs wasted, lol. She was on the way to a great doubles career though. I expect she'll be back in a few years.

lex pretend, Friday, 19 September 2014 06:14 (1 week ago) Permalink

Oh god, I just realised that Li's last ever point was THAT DF down MP after the overrule. What a very...Li Na way to end a career. Also very Li Na: ending her career on the first day of the tournament created for her.

I saw her last ever match in person!

lex pretend, Friday, 19 September 2014 06:29 (1 week ago) Permalink

Suarez Navarro is so good for the game, hope she keeps up her form

Matt Armstrong, Friday, 19 September 2014 07:22 (1 week ago) Permalink

bye Li Na. really glad she stayed on to win that 2nd slam instead of retiring last summer or whenever it was rumoured before

cerealbar, Friday, 19 September 2014 15:37 (1 week ago) Permalink

Niculescu wins Guangzhou: the most dominant title run of the year! No more than 4 games lost in each match <3333

lex pretend, Saturday, 20 September 2014 07:18 (1 week ago) Permalink

Dimitrov's Spotify playlist!

lex pretend, Saturday, 20 September 2014 17:37 (1 week ago) Permalink


Roz, Saturday, 20 September 2014 20:38 (1 week ago) Permalink

On board with this "Goffin is the male Halep" narrative. Gamewise and career trajectory-wise, it all fits. Initial minor hype after promising result as a youngster; two-year stall during which they didn't even look impressive; sudden massive breakthrough and multiple tournament wins out of nowhere, both playing every shot and rally with so much confidence and purpose. Anyway, Metz title (beating Tsonga en route), 34 wins in his past 36 matches, he's coming.

lex pretend, Sunday, 21 September 2014 14:33 (1 week ago) Permalink

Just noticed Goffin won Metz and that should put his ranking up to 32. He still looks adorably boyish and I think maybe he's too modest in scale to really get much higher than this but this is kinda heartwarming.


oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Sunday, 21 September 2014 14:43 (1 week ago) Permalink

I had that window open a long time, what can I say. Other than "Goffin is still cute lololol."

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Sunday, 21 September 2014 14:44 (1 week ago) Permalink

Garcia is so damn talented. And for all that she's a known choker, she's just won third set TBs on consecutive days against Venus and Aga. GET MORE CONSISTENT THO, these wins looked wonderful but I also see your string of losses preceding Barthel, Gibbs, BZS, Begu, Babos...

lex pretend, Monday, 22 September 2014 09:55 (1 week ago) Permalink

Ivanovic retired down 5-7 5-6 lol

also I just noticed that Gajdosova has won 12 matches in the last 2,5 weeks

groovemaaan, Monday, 22 September 2014 11:33 (1 week ago) Permalink

I saw Goffin win all of five games vs Monaco at the Olympics two years ago and he looked out of his depth with nothing remarkable about his game. Late bloomer.

Michael Jones, Monday, 22 September 2014 11:50 (1 week ago) Permalink

lmao a Serena/Cornet re-rematch in R2 of Wuhan. You'd think that it'd be Serena Vengeance Time but then you'd have thought that at Wimbledon.

lex pretend, Monday, 22 September 2014 13:30 (1 week ago) Permalink

Really excited about a potential Gajdosova renaissance. I mean, sure, she's a brainless ball basher, but damn it, I like her and she's dealt with a lot of shit and playing her way back in smaller tournaments and getting lots of wins warms my heart.

Sweta is a set up over Sharapova. COME ON.

Gotta say I think Radwanska may be in for a lean 2015.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Monday, 22 September 2014 13:40 (1 week ago) Permalink

Cornet technically 3-0 over Serena in 2014. Wut.

lex pretend, Tuesday, 23 September 2014 10:53 (1 week ago) Permalink

Serena out of sorts, other top players flopping terribly... Wozniacki to finish 2015 at #1 without a Slam, you read it first here.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Tuesday, 23 September 2014 12:56 (1 week ago) Permalink

the next 12 months are going to be hilariously awful.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Tuesday, 23 September 2014 12:57 (1 week ago) Permalink

wow, timea has beaten sharapova in straight sets! so good to have her back.

groovemaaan, Wednesday, 24 September 2014 08:35 (6 days ago) Permalink

She was working in a hotel this time last year apparently! Hadn't seen her for so long. Still the same - wonderful BH, iffy FH that accidentally gives people fits with its junk, sort of like Pironkova. She played excellently.

lex pretend, Wednesday, 24 September 2014 08:58 (6 days ago) Permalink

what an amazing comeback story for her this year

Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 24 September 2014 09:00 (6 days ago) Permalink

shut up toni nadal pt 94903422

lex pretend, Wednesday, 24 September 2014 15:17 (6 days ago) Permalink

Petra up 3-0 over Hypechard in a couple of minuts :D :D :D. Come on Petra, finish this before you get too sweaty.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Saturday, 27 September 2014 07:21 (3 days ago) Permalink

Bouchard really should just stand back, hope, and moonball. That's really all she could hurt Kvitova with.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Saturday, 27 September 2014 08:06 (3 days ago) Permalink

Only danger Petra faces vs Bouchard is getting bored bc it's so easy. Was pretty funny when the commentators commended Bouchard for finally getting more than three games in a set vs Petra. Little milestones!

lex pretend, Saturday, 27 September 2014 08:37 (3 days ago) Permalink

the Murray final was hilarious today. So bad and then 2-6 down in the TB he suddenly decided to be aggressive. Finally wins a title in 2014!

Benneteau meanwhile falls to 0-10 in career finals, though I'm happier to see Kei rebound from the USO final.

lex pretend, Sunday, 28 September 2014 13:58 (2 days ago) Permalink

Errani's first serve percentage in the third set vs Nara today was 91%. She won 9% of those first serve points. Stats very much in character

lex pretend, Sunday, 28 September 2014 14:50 (2 days ago) Permalink

lol @ the beijing crowd laughing about gulbis' forehand technique

groovemaaan, Tuesday, 30 September 2014 14:03 (4 hours ago) Permalink

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