Twitter C/D

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the father, the son, and the holy ghost

love how twitter blurbers are compelled to write like this, can't just say "cracker barrel getting dunked on"

With Twitter Blue, the company's new subscription service, you'll be able to pay real $$$ to get someone to actually look at your harassment reports 🤡https://t.co/bmAbBpk2UO pic.twitter.com/Px0Nf1Ilh5

— Ryan Brown 🎮 (@Toadsanime) June 3, 2021

Rich blue checks are going to purge the site

tbf it only costs three dollars a month

tbf, even if costs only a handful of cents per month, it's bullshit that they are straight up admitting that paying them will be the only way for them to take harassment complaints seriously in a reasonable timeframe

yes that is true

for $3 a month, i should be able to harass anyone i want

nobody with any self-respect would pay a fucking penny for twitter. And if you get booted much faster or more frequently for dunking on some blue-tick+ arsehole, then it's reaching the end of its usefulness for ordinary folk.

self-respect? on _my_ internet? never!

lol probably self-respect is probably wrong! but not fucking rebellious enough by half.

lol it's such wretched bullshit you don't even get ad-free for paying subscription.

The only website here there are *no* ads for people who don’t sign up for an account

Banned in Nigeria

"The Federal Government has suspended, indefinitely, the operations of the microblogging and social networking service, Twitter, in Nigeria," the Ministry of Information and Culture announced in a statement https://t.co/bCCoDFtWlu

— CNN (@CNN) June 4, 2021

So what happened to her on twitter? Reading this and thinking she said some shit and couldn't stay cool with the overreaction.

Written by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Wow. She went in. https://t.co/IsBPUh0IIK pic.twitter.com/kLjxIgZG4D

— Tomiwa Owolade (@tomowolade) June 16, 2021

You don't remember the transphobia row from a couple of years ago?

In other news, comics twitter dunking on a 16 year old for saying ppl shouldn't be shamed for torrenting comics, really cool.

I didn't know of that row, no.

Regrettable because I do think her original misstep - refusing to say trans women are women while stating that trans ppl have an important role to play in liberation - was well intentioned ignorance rather than the actively hateful TERFery of the UK press, but once she got called out on that she went the way of every other celeb that ppl have dared to disagree with.

I was wondering whether 'trans women are women' was the mantra she was referring to.

How fucking stupid can you be on twitter

That’s obviously made up and I suggest you delete it.

— Steven Fielding (@PolProfSteve) June 17, 2021

need to shout out lagoon’s restaurant bot. i cant get enough of this

https://www.twitter.com/_restaurant_bot/status/1406724062353764354

thank you friend, its a genuine viral sensation

that restaurant actually looks good, most of them i feel seem pretty mediocre, the ones people really go wild for tho are like kfc except in kuwait and also when it fucks up* and posts four selfies of senegalese soldiers instead of a restaurant

*actually google fault

is it really completely random or do you do some curation? has such a remarkably consistent overarching vibe

someone asked me how it works so i will just post those tweets tho one thing i didnt mention is i did actually put a handful of countries in there twice so 'FR', 'US', 'ES', 'IT', 'JP', 'TW', 'CN', 'TH', 'VN', 'MX', 'PT', 'KR' have double the chance of being selected just cause i like their food, otherwise yeah its random tho the data itself is biased in some ways

it starts with a list of all the cities in the world with a population above 25k, then it generates a list of all the countries included in that list, then it randomly picks a country from that list, then it randomly picks a city thats in that country from the cities list...

— br◎seph (@on3ness) June 11, 2021

, the cities list includes coordinates from all the cities, it uses the google places api to search for the city, then searches nearby for places tagged restaurant (but not lodging or gas station lol), then does a couple other searches to round up the photos...

— br◎seph (@on3ness) June 11, 2021

then uses the twitter api to tweet, glad you like it!

— br◎seph (@on3ness) June 11, 2021

should also note that if it fails to find a restaurant that has enough photos it starts the search over, which is why for instance you dont see restaurants from mainland china where google is banned, there just arent any results

— br◎seph (@on3ness) June 11, 2021

one thing ive noticed, because it will post a streetview image of the restaurant if available, is that google is so awful at finding storefronts on streetview, i swear their hit rate is <25%, i could understand if its in a place that has a vague address system but look at this its california wtf

Beachside Restaurant & Bar; 14160 Palawan Way, Marina Del Rey, CA 90292, USA https://t.co/OfWA5uZRvT pic.twitter.com/negBy5IVk6

— Random Restaurant (@_restaurant_bot) June 20, 2021

How fucking stupid can you be on twitter

― xyzzzz__, Thursday, 17 June 2021 bookmarkflaglink

Here is how the matter 'closed'.

In light of recent events. pic.twitter.com/EUdCCUdrZp

— Steven Fielding (@PolProfSteve) June 23, 2021

i've just been put in the A/B group that has algorithmic timeline forced with no way to turn it back to chronological and of all the bad site changes they've done this is the only one that actually makes it unusable

update: they reverted it after a couple minutes. i guess they're just testing it on people in short bursts to see if they continue to engage?

i did not continue to engage

thank you for your service

Crikey. That would kill Twitter for me, basically making it a weak imitation of Instagram. (Which is horrible to begin with.)

The BBC nicely conflating free speech activism and Bitcoin promotion here:

“Jack Dorsey: Unpicking Twitter boss's passion for Nigeria”

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-57568370

I had no idea Dorsey was such a Bitcoin bro. I guess I should follow him just to see what sort of BS he’s hawking next?

Did they really mean to say “unpicking”? “Unpacking”, maybe?

i've gotten it a couple more times today, sometimes it goes away with a refresh, sometimes it doesn't and then goes away after a couple minutes. given that it seems more likely they're testing something than its a bug

yeah i read that they were testing that, so dumb just let the people who want the chronological timeline have it, im sure the vast majority of just use the default

seems like they just flipped the switch for everyone at once, literally everyone on my tl is complaining now

That’s just because the algorithm knows you like complaining

i use a plugin that blocks trending topics and removes RTs from the main timeline and they are slowly breaking it ffs

only use tweetdeck imo

never put twitter on your phone also imo

yeah i got the good timeline taken away fr a while today

FINALLY!!!! A terrible wrong is being righted- a miscarriage of justice is corrected! pic.twitter.com/NrGUdwr23c

— Phylicia Rashad (@PhyliciaRashad) June 30, 2021

this has to be the ratio record

There's really only one German word that perfectly encompasses a specific feeling that hasn't been verbalized in English, you can stop asking for every dumb feeling you come up with.

i think i….. like the algo

the new taboo

lol

to me, it’s more about what’s in the tweets than the order they’re presented in

🐾 We are heartbroken over the tragedy in Surfside FL, so many hoomans perished..  Some of the survivors’ pets are trapped in the rubble too. These are Mia, Daisy and Coco. Not pictured, Binks (same condo as Daisy), another cat Hippo and a chameleon named Grimlock. pic.twitter.com/C1j7OJqX6b

— The Oval Pawffice® 🇺🇸 DOTUS Fans (@TheOvalPawffice) July 2, 2021

There's,apparently cats stuck on the 4th and 10th floors that they can't get to, and a possible dog in a crate.

no idea where to put this apart from here - they found more Japanese fake baseball players!

We found additional pages of them! If you’d not seen them, you’re welcome!
I’ve wanted to get a Mets jersey with “Balloon” for a while now… pic.twitter.com/xzB4BVs5vO

— Shane Duggan (@SB_Duggan) July 15, 2021