Guys who stare really ostentatiously at a girl's ass after she passes him on the sidewalk

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I have never burst into a tapdance while singing "Everything's Comin' Up Roses" after seeing a particularly phat azz.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:02 (nineteen years ago) link

Hrrrmmmmm. Do I oogle dirty dronerock boys' asslessness on a regular basis?

Oh my lord, you bet I do.

The only thing that makes me against men ass-oogling women is that I have such a horrible, awful ass. Even when I was skinny, I had an awful flat indie-boy ass. Now I'm fat, it's just saggy and gross. Sigh.

So I guess I'm just jealous that I've never *been* ass-oogled.

I guess what I'm saying is that if it's done in a flattering and complimentary way, as opposed to a threatening way, then it's really just fine.

Sometimes guys stare at you and it's all "yeah, I look good!" and sometimes guys stare at you and you want to ask one of your friends to walk you back to your house, just in case.

― Masonic Cathedral (kate), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:02 (nineteen years ago) link

some asses look better nude and some look better clothed. i need to do more field research before I can report the exact types of ass that constitute each category.

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:02 (nineteen years ago) link

My girlfriend and I are equal opportunity oglers although we don't always have the same taste, so if you ever catch me holding her hand and looking at some guy's ass, it just means that we're comparing notes on posterior esthetics. She always points out the cute guys in a crowd, which is cool 'cause then I can ogle away guilt free (as long as I point them out to her).

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago) link

Sometimes guys stare at you and it's all "yeah, I look good!" and sometimes guys stare at you and you want to ask one of your friends to walk you back to your house, just in case.

yeah, context is everything.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago) link

I tend to stare when men have shabby asses more than nice ones (ie skinny emo boys whose ass is, in width, less than one of my legs.)

Seriously! What the hell are those kids eating / snorting? Or is the emunk lifestyle condusive to very active metabolisms that burn away any fat that might accentuate one's buttocks? It was bad enough I was rocking the Dockers around a throng of kids in Opeth hoodies and black fast-food slacks - I could fit TWO legs from an emunker into ONE leg of the pants I was wearing!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago) link

I kinda like getting caught. I mean as long as you're not doing the ass looking in an overly perverted manner (stopped dead in your tacks, drooling & playing with yourself) chances are the person is going to get a kick outta being checked out. Giving a smile as opposed to acting like you were doing something you shouldn't have is key.

lordy xposts!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:04 (nineteen years ago) link

John, clearly what you must do is run up and yank her pants down.

― sunburned and snowblind (kenan), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:04 (nineteen years ago) link

i went to a yankees/red sox game about ten years ago with The Girl I Lost My Virginity To and her family, and all she and her mom could talk about were the ballplayers' asses. For some reason they seemed particularly enamored with Mo Vaughn (?!?!?!?).

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Please note: the median age of the boys in question in my last post was probably 17. I am 64.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

TS: ogling vs. oogling?

― Cathy (Cathy), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

I am pretty certain I have the weirdest ass in the world. I would prefer that people just ignore it.

― Poundstretcher (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Best of all is turning to check out the ass of the person you have just passed, and find them turning to (presumably) get an extra glimpse of your own hot glutecakes.

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

ya get me sum yanks-sox tix while yr at it thx

― terry thatcher, Friday, 1 April 2005 16:06 (nineteen years ago) link

Hmmm. (to Kenan.)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:06 (nineteen years ago) link

now giving a smile when caught, that seems creepy

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:06 (nineteen years ago) link

What about making the sex-crazed wolf face?

― Poundstretcher (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:07 (nineteen years ago) link

dude i can't get you tix! sheesh.

even if you have a nice ass.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:07 (nineteen years ago) link

jaymc why are you so...literal? i think that's what bugs people.

i mean "i like the ass in a naked context"? "naked context"? dude.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:07 (nineteen years ago) link

Mo Vaughn's got some dumps! Also, the bat wiggle.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:08 (nineteen years ago) link

sorry "nude context." even weirder.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:08 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.a-bd.com/images/products/DEM_V15Z61_256.jpg

― Poundstretcher (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Adam, when did I say I was indie?

http://www.art-ificial.com/indie/adam.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:09 (nineteen years ago) link

hahaha!

― Poundstretcher (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:09 (nineteen years ago) link

---

i do not appreciate this. i am skinny, i eat lots of disgusting and fatty things. my stomach is now sagging lack an old mans but still i am skinny elsewhere. i canna help it, pls do not make fun of my self?

ps what is up w/ girls w / absoluetly no ass whatsoever? you kno the type? for some reason they are always v hot otherwise. i feel sorry for them, when i see them.

pps SHUT UP CATHY

― terry thatcher, agian, Friday, 1 April 2005 16:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Well, it has to a well exicuted smile. Not a "hey there baby" smile so much as a "ya.. i was looking at it - you caught me" smile. I have spent 10 years perfecting it.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Amateurist, I'm not sure what you're accusing me of. I realize the ridiculousness of saying "nude context", but what else am I gonna say! And I don't think this kind of literalness, if that's what is, has anything to do with my recent Noise Board skirmishes (which is the only place I know where people have talked about being bugged by me).

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:24 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm drinking tea and I brought a Pavement CD to work with me. Oh, and I'm going to see Will Oldham play tonight. In an art gallery.

-- jaymc (jmcunnin...), April 15th, 2004.

― Poundstretcher (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:26 (nineteen years ago) link

Well, it has to a well executed smile. Not a "hey there baby" smile so much as a "ya.. i was looking at it - you caught me" smile.
I have spent 10 years perfecting it.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:27 (nineteen years ago) link

(xp) Hahahaha! Nice work. That's the night I first saw Joanna Newsom!

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:27 (nineteen years ago) link

Good on ya, Thermo. I seriously doubt I'd look anything but creeeepy if I tried that. I would just look away and turn red.

― sunburned and snowblind (kenan), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:28 (nineteen years ago) link

I envy you Thermo. I think the more I'd practice, the creepier it'd get. I'll just stick with the ol' finger through the hole-in-the-hand method.

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Ha haha!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:30 (nineteen years ago) link

the ol' finger through the hole-in-the-hand method

plz leave Jesus out of this, k' thnx.

― sunburned and snowblind (kenan), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:30 (nineteen years ago) link

Hey, it's rude to be rude too.

x-posts.

― Cathy (Cathy), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:31 (nineteen years ago) link

Jesus enters into things every time I perv on women. It cannot be avoided.

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:32 (nineteen years ago) link

i like to try and guess the type of underwear a girl is wearing. If i'm ever out dancinc and a girl is wearing white trousers/skirt i ALWAYS dance close until i can confirm whether she is or isn't wearing panties.

It's just a game.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:33 (nineteen years ago) link

()ops are you catholic? just askin'.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:35 (nineteen years ago) link

Does the pope shit in the woods?

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:36 (nineteen years ago) link

I need to know before I commit.

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:37 (nineteen years ago) link

okay, just wonderin'. it would be weird if jesus entered into things every time you perv on women, and you were like jewish or something.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:38 (nineteen years ago) link

Or a Buddhist.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:39 (nineteen years ago) link

J.C. gets around.

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:40 (nineteen years ago) link

He's always hanging around with you when you perv on girls, for example.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:41 (nineteen years ago) link

I heard his movie SUCKED

― Airtube (nordicskilla), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Oops almost made me snort some partially chewed carrots out of my nose.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:43 (nineteen years ago) link

No, that's J.C. Chavez.
xpost possibly

― ()ops (()()ps), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:44 (nineteen years ago) link

post pics of asses pls. why hasn't this happened yet?

― sugarpants: kind of blurry, kind of double (sugarpants), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:44 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.staylace.com/films/graphics/girl_help.jpg

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:47 (nineteen years ago) link

Because having the ass RIGHT THERE TO STARE AT IN PERPETUITY defeats the beauty of the sneaked gaze we're discussing.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 1 April 2005 16:48 (nineteen years ago) link

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Guys who stare really ostentatiously at a girl's ass after she passes him on the sidewalk - C/D