Internet Dating

what set them off? 'hey good lookin what you got cookin'???

ime that kind of blocking is not bullshit but just sth you have to get used to and accept. they don't owe you their time or a response and on some sites blocking may be the most efficient way to take someone out of their search results that they're not interested in seeing again. may seem harsh but think of it as someone at a bar who just isn't interested in talking. anyway getting used to doing this same kinda thing myself, n not agonizing over the writing of polite rejections or w/e, has made using okc much much more viable for me over the years, idk.

Yeah, I can see that. Just new to this, and hadn't encountered it anywhere else on social media. But, DC, your comparison makes sense.

(My initial messages are always either a) boring, "hi there" or "hello" or "we're a match here, how about that?" pablum or b) a genuine question based on the profile, because I suck at this medium. But I have met a few nice ladies to talk to.)

the numbers don't really favor men seeking women, and it opens the door to being treated dismissively, which feels bad.

on the flipside, as a man talking to women, you are way less likely to get gross or abusive messages than a woman would be talking to a man.

in conclusion, everyone feels dehumanized by these programs, to varying extents.

I've never done internet dating, but have heard many many horror stories of men getting abusive after being rejected, and whether or not their initial messages are polite/friendly/"normal" seems to have no bearing on how they react. So it is a lot *safer* for women who aren't interested to block and move on.

(Also as general advice, I'd be far more inclined to respond to your type b messages than type a.)

YMMV, but when I was dating I appreciated a clear signal that someone was definitely not interested in me. Just rip off the Band-Aid and avoid wasting the time of everyone involved, y'know? Lots of fish, etc.

It worked for me... but I marvel at my luck, tbh

every woman i know who's had internet dating experience has felt overwhelmed by the number of replies women receive, too. seems like for every random reply a man will receive, a woman will receive one hundred.

many women explicitly complain about receiving first-contact form-letter spam from men as well, mailed in bulk to up their odds

https://www.wired.com/story/bumble-grindr-and-hinge-moderators-trauma/