Worst ever festival line up?

That can't be real, surely!?

What happened to Badly Drawn Boy? He was supposed to be a massive star, now he's spent over a decade propping up the bottom of shitty festival lineups.

I mean, fucking hell, you couldn't possibly come up with a worse line-up than that. Either way, it's some expert trolling!

Last time I saw anything from BDB he was going mental and calling an audience cunts, chucking his harmonica at them

He seems really unpleasant

Badly Behaved Boy

They should have got Crispy Ambulance to headline

"Football Legends Charity Darts Match, Charlotte Church in Conversation, The Liverpool International Air Guitar Competition"

^^^ HMHB lyric

"Try to imagine your favourite bands, huge tunes, combined with a decadent Victoriana carnival, wicked fun, with a heavy dose of outrageous sideshows, and you’ll begin to get a picture of what HOPE & GLORY festival is. A festival of proper music and real anthems."

AND they've got a clay trampoline, for those who'd prefer hospital.

the fact that the twang have apparently been floating around doing their thing for over a decade now has gotten me down

'The Membranes & 25 Piece Choir'

?!?!?!?!&^&^%$$^^$^?!%>?{?!?!?

"Charlotte Church's Late Night Pop Dungeon"?

that sounds like something v different than she intended

"The Membranes will be bringing their critically acclaimed gig with a 25 piece all women choir to the Lexington on Friday June 3rd"

Looks like this is a regular thing at the moment.

that sounds like something v different than she intended

Does it, though?

"Charlotte Church's Late Night Pop Dungeon"?

her whole current tour is billed as this.
and i bet its bloody brilliant.

it very well might be! I was only focused on the "dungeon" name, my only experience with her music is when the label was trying to push her as a Josh Groban-type artist which I gather she hasn't been doing for over a decade.

Explaining the Pop Dungeon concept, Church said: “Down the dark, dark stairs, upon the bloody gallows of soft rock, through the oubliette of cheese, into the torture chamber of disco, you are welcomed to the Late Night Pop Dungeon.

“The Grand High Executionatrix, dungeon mistress Charlotte Church ,and her ten-piece ultra-metronomic post-punk-disco-R’n’R’n’B backing band will give her MK Ultra treatment to the greatest tunes that time forgot, and some that will forever haunt our collective memory. Bring dancing shoes – the floor is on fire.”

There is a festival planned for Pioneer Square in Seattle this year that has the worst lineup I've ever seen.

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr03/2013/2/28/11/enhanced-buzz-6834-1362070250-1.jpg

This would have been the worst but it was cancelled.

Wonder why.

Re previous, Hope&Glory, dunno there are a few good things in there, and the rest are mostly not awful. if you were to watch until you were ready to move on, should be OK I think.

So what is the best UK festival this year? Does one exist? Compared to a lot of European and US festivals, I find it hard to find one that caters to my music taste, isn't a totally basic commercial nightmare, isn't a total hippie dread-fest, is still fun, goes on late enough into the night, isn't massively oversubscribed and isn't way overpriced. That said, I really miss being in a field over the summer and hearing music. Is Europe the way to go?

Safe as Milk looks p good;

https://safeasmilkfestival.com/sam17

Counterflows festival always has seem great performances:

http://counterflows.com/

I'd love to go to Safe As Milk. I Doubt I could convince any of my mates to go - they're all Boomtown Fair fans. Alas, the plight of the hipster music fan living in a small city.

You have to feel sorry for The Verve Pipe, having a similar name to a far superior band.

the verve pipe must be seriously lousy

we were merely freshmahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhn
AIAHAOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

i blame dog latin

http://thequietus.com/articles/22112-safe-as-milk-cancelled

aw what?
i had a feeling something like that might happen for some reason.

Hello people how is everybody doing! Glad for being here!

fkn hell Younced why did you have to get Safe As Milk cancelled

I knew that lineup was too good to be true. It seems every time I see a UK festival with a really good lineup, it gets canceled. Happened with Jabberwocky, Temples Festival in Bristol last year, Bloc in London in 2012, umpteen ATP fests. And yet there are dozens of rubbishy things that go ahead without a hitch every year.

The problem is that "really good lineup" =! "commercially viable", in fact you could argue that the better the lineup the less viable it is. I can't say I'm surprised that Safe as Milk is cancelled either.

think things like this are just not going to be possible in the UK in the foreseeable future without sponsorship or (presumably increasingly scarce) arts funding. uncertain if SAM was funding itself in any way aside from ticket sales but I doubt its partnerships were providing much revenue, or that Newcastle (where the organisers are from and which cut its arts budget by 100% a few years ago before walking that back in some way) is likely to prop up a festival taking place in another country

conversely Big Ears in the States appears to be supported by a mixture of craft beer companies and wealthy liberals with bottomless wells of cash: http://bigearsfestival.com/partners/

Also I hate to say it but Prestatyn as a location is wtf. I wonder why they thought they could succeed where ATP had failed with more or less the same business model.

And it's in April which is a funny time to be standing outside watching music.

Still, such a shame. I love festivals but I don't like the idea of spending a lot of money on something that isn't up to scratch. I look at US and Euro lineups and feel so jealous. Maybe Europe is the way to go after all. Get a holiday out of it too.

xp I went to a Bugged Out Weekender there in 2000, my memory was that it was busy enough but their website differs

November 17th 2000 was the date of the Bugged Out Weekender at Pontins Holiday Camp, Prestatyn. The cast was beyond stellar: Underworld and Reprazent live, The Chemical Brothers, Dave Clarke, Felix Da Housecat, Green Velvet, Richie Hawtin, Carl Craig, DJ Hype, James Lavelle, Jon Carter, Gilles Peterson, Roger Sanchez, Slam, Justin Robertson, X Press 2, Lottie, Craig Richards, Yousef, Harvey, Mark Rae, Jacques lu Cont, Mr Scruff, Bent, Rob da Bank…the list goes on and on. Even Doves played an acoustic set in the pub run by the Heavenly Social. Thing is only 1500 people (half the capacity) turned up meaning that at best you were able to dance to the Chems without being crushed or see the whites of Karl Hyde’s eyes as he performed but at worst there were sometimes only a handful of people dancing in some of the rooms. Looking at the line-up it still makes us think, ‘What the fuck happened there then?’ But I guess Prestatyn in North Wales was probably not the best choice, it was inflicted with biblical weather in the weeks leading up to it (in fact it was almost cancelled due to flooding). The train system was also fucked that month with regular trips from London to the area taking nine hours. Still, there were still a lot of good memories from it – the best being the spirit of the people who did make the trip – with the NME summing it up perfectly by calling it “a spiritual success”. We take solace in that when we recall that we lost our shirts (pants and socks) that weekend…

zero memory of Underworld playing oddly but the midnight-6am run of Hawtin > Green Velvet > Dave Clarke was nuts

goose island is owned by inbev and four roses is owned by kirin

i wonder if there's anything mailchimp won't sponsor

let's hope not!

here's hoping big weed wants to support everything in 5 years

how do 21 pilots play every festival? also weezer. do they have different bands like the blue man group who play for them? also, i am going to this because these are all of my favorite bands:

It’s time to round up your crew, book your flights and start planning your Pineapple campground kingdom! The fifth instalment of Big Pineapple Music Festival returns to the lush hinterland of Queensland’s Sunshine Coast on Saturday 27 May, with camping available from Friday 26 May.

Birds of Tokyo • Peking Duk • SAFIA • Northlane • Cloud Control • The Veronicas • City Calm Down • LDRU • DZ Deathrays • Horrorshow • Vera Blue • Harts • Alex Lahey • BOO SEEKA • NGAIIRE • Polish Club • Sampa The Great • Bootleg Rascal • Jack River • Nicole Millar • Pierce Brothers • Citizen Kay • BEC SANDRIDGE • Fortunes. • Moonbase • Lastlings • Benson • Winston Surfshirt • Ocean Alley • West Thebarton Brothel Party • Gold Member • Hey Geronimo • Bearfoot • In2natioN • Buck Dean And The Green Lips • High Tropics • Arpier • The Hi-Boys • DJFRO

okay, fine, i'm not going. i like alternate universe festivals though where i don't know who anyone is. winston surfshirt!

okay it looks like frank ocean/chance the rapper/21 pilots/weezer just travel the world together. they must have the same agent.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lw4uf1cdB3g

rock fest vid blowing my mind right now

'crowbar' and 'sidewise'... there's no way these are real bands

areal o'hanlon used to be the compere on some bbc stand up show on saturday nights after motd in the 90s, even as a child easily amused by any sort of comedy i found him a bit bad and boring.

xpost it's "Crobot" in this video

Crowbar are very real and very awesome