pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

Either you wrote for Vox or you had a wicked jump shot

I Had to Write Click Bait To Escape Poverty... And That's Okay

All Of My Dreams Died ... And Here's Why

You Have To Read Upper Mississippi Sh@kedown's Epic Takedown of His Career

Radiohead's A Moon Shaped Pool: The 5 Most Important Things To Know

We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)
We hear eerie glissandos (you know, like when there’s a cliffhanger at the end of a Lost episode)

also, This Mortal Coil didn't write "Another Day," rock geniuses

someone tell them to up the res on the photos on the front page. whole things blurry as hell

http://i66.tinypic.com/11vsdtv.png

it's because they are in heaven

Scrolling up and down, I am born again,” Thom Yorke sang on OK Computer’s “Airbag,” which was written about a car accident, but could also describe the experience of using a message board.

lol

all album reviews should compare the listening experience to that of using a message board
so is it written, so shall it be

I had never even seen a message board before.

scrolling up and down, I am born again - best screen name ever?

a supergroup whose lineup includes some of the Bush era's most forward-thinking punk musicians: Jordan Billie and Cody Votolato of the Blood Brothers, Justin Pearson and Gabe Serbian of the Locust and the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s Nick Zinner

One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other Dept

Do you mean the faulty parallel construction?

assume he just means "the YYYs aren't a punk band" which definitely seems like something worth posting here

saddest supergoup

this is bad:
http://pitchfork.com/features/article/9894-the-dark-art-of-mastering-music/

purports to explain mastering but mostly resorts to a bunch of different bad metaphors and continually referring to it as mysterious and inexplicable

"If rock stars are the sex gods of music, mastering engineers are its druids, the ones who work methodically and meticulously, and to whom people come for mystical wisdom and blessing."

there's good useful stuff mixed in there but mostly their conclusion is that the job of the mastering engineer is to make stuff sound good, which isn't a very good explanation

there is an excellent interview with Scott Hull of Masterdisk in the new issue of Tape Op Magazine that i just got in the mail. very illuminating.

also a long interview with Don Was that is good. don't think i knew that he was now the president of blue note records.

i certainly didn't

that mastering article was so disappointing

no one knows what they do... so we wont try to explain

this fits my lifestyle and my kicky new windswept summer look.

http://wwd.com/media-news/fashion-memopad/conde-nast-traveler-pitchfork-launch-musical-magazine-spotify-10434908/

ow, that mastering article made me angry! One because, it reeks of non-musician-dumbsplains-music-stuff, and two because I actually have a hard time believing MC Schmidt doesn't know what mastering is!

Here's mastering: after a track has been recorded and mixed, you send the completed audio file to a mastering engineer. He makes (usually subtle) changes to it, including compression, EQ and overall volume/gain. The important difference between this process, and the mixing process, is that in mastering, you're working with a single audio file -- the whole song, that's already been recorded and mixed -- which is why the changes are usually subtle (but important).

Why would that have been so hard to explain in that article, like maybe somewhere in the first couple of paragraphs?

Re: "Traveler"

Yep, nothing makes me feel like I'm barrelling down the open road of summer like the line "he came out a little late / maybe that's where frustration's born"

hey dominique that's a really good and concise explanation!

L.F.W

this is still one of my favorite interviews on mastering: http://roberthenke.com/interviews/mastering.html

Here's mastering: after a track has been recorded and mixed, you send the completed audio file to a mastering engineer. He makes (usually subtle) changes to it, including compression, EQ and overall volume/gain. The important difference between this process, and the mixing process, is that in mastering, you're working with a single audio file -- the whole song, that's already been recorded and mixed -- which is why the changes are usually subtle (but important).

no offense, but let me translate that to a general audience because you lost me at "mastering":

the master is given a box containing an ocean of sound. they pour the water out onto the board with hundreds of unknowable knobs and waves begin to form over certain areas. the master makes a few adjustments, and then turns to talk to the biggest asshole musician of all time, plus his evil twin manager who does the talking. everyone pretends that everything is pretty good but could be a little better. after sending the noobs out for a restroom break, the master adds a little Oomph to the low end and a little twizzle to the high end (these correspond with sounds that bounce off of the ear lobe and the top part of the ear, respectively). the most important part of mastering is maintaining a straight face at the end of the process, after the high fives, when the master talks about what changes were made and why. this is difficult for both parties in the conversation but absolutely necessary for a good mastering job.

lol

classic behind the scenes footage of the mastering process:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJsYKhEV6o0

So what you're saying is you would have been lost at the headline of any article about mastering.

actual photograph of famed mastering engineer steve hoffman
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/48/JosephWright-Alchemist-Cropped.jpg

xpost

thanks niels!

lol dominique i was just kidding, and i agree with niels btw!

haha ok. I so rarely do anything helpful for anyone, was too protective of my paragraph

in real life laugh out loud at "after the high fives"

KM that's some top notch Clickhole style writing

I'm about to send an album out for mastering. Is there like a Yelp for finding someone good or is it all word of mouth?

Gary is great.

do you have enough money for Howie Weinberg

If your music is loud/heavy, I recommend James Plotkin.

kind of amazed james plotkin even has ears at this point. but yeah, he's great.

If your music is loud/heavy, I recommend James Plotkin.

― Don Van Gorp, midwest regional VP, marketing (誤訳侮辱), Thursday, May 26, 2016 6:03 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

kind of amazed james plotkin even has ears at this point. but yeah, he's great.

― like $500 billion in stuffed fart sales and I have an idea (contenderizer), Thursday, May 26, 2016 9:29 PM (45 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Thirded. Firsthand experience, that guy's great

another cog in the devilish strickler machine!

https://twitter.com/kickstarter/status/738028232138760192

wonder if even more of the old staff is going to start jumping ship...

Why, is there a reason? Or do you mean since the redesign?