HEY JEWS

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The Torah instructs a Jew not to eat (or even possess) chometz all seven days of Passover (Exodus 13:3). "Chometz" is defined as any of the five grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, and rye) that came into contact with water for more than 18 minutes. This is a serious Torah prohibition, and for that reason we take extra protective measures on Passover to prevent any mistakes.

Which brings us to another category of food called "kitniyot" (sometimes referred to generically as "legumes"). This includes rice, corn, soy beans, string beans, peas, lentils, peanuts, mustard, sesame seeds and poppy seeds. Even though kitniyot cannot technically become chometz, Ashkenazi Jews do not eat them on Passover. Why?

The Smak (Rabbi Moshe of Kouchi, 13th century, France) explains that products of kitniyot appear like chometz products. For example, it can be hard to distinguish between rice flour (kitniyot) and wheat flour (chometz). Therefore, to prevent confusion, all kitniyot was prohibited.

mizzell, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:40 (5 years ago) Permalink

I'm throwing myself in with the Sephardic camp this year.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:42 (5 years ago) Permalink

Take a Hot Dog
and make it Kosher

the drummer from the hilarious 1990's Britpop act Gay Dad (wanko ergo sum), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:45 (5 years ago) Permalink

Oh makes more sense, and yes, I know the story, but I'm wondering why go so much further than just bread, I mean, Matzah is just unleavened bread, still has wheat in it and all, it's not like they didn't have enough time to cook pasta when escaping Egypt.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:46 (5 years ago) Permalink

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

•--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:47 (5 years ago) Permalink

Which is to say, eating corn is a long ways away from letting bread rise.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:48 (5 years ago) Permalink

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

Don't eat that - EAT THIS

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:51 (5 years ago) Permalink

passover is a great holiday.
G R E A T

BUT, the Haggadahs have not arrived in the mail from my grandfather yet and I'm also getting a bit nervous about seating... also, anyone have a good veggie matzoh ball soup recipe? vegetarians certainly won't eat teh brisket.

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:55 (5 years ago) Permalink

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:58 (5 years ago) Permalink

apparently quinoa is ok.

mizzell, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:59 (5 years ago) Permalink

good to qui-know-a

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:00 (5 years ago) Permalink

Seven days of quinoa and matzah sounds . . . constipating.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:00 (5 years ago) Permalink

Can we turn this thread also into a list of all of the awesome things about being jewish in general?

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:01 (5 years ago) Permalink

1. Chosen people.
2. Latkes

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:02 (5 years ago) Permalink

3. Talmud

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:03 (5 years ago) Permalink

4. hot sabbath sex

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:03 (5 years ago) Permalink

5. Neuroses

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:04 (5 years ago) Permalink

6. control of the media/money

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

― quincie, Monday, April 6, 2009 11:58 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

This may explain my increased secularism that started around the time I became vegetarian.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:04 (5 years ago) Permalink

6. Noodle kugel

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:05 (5 years ago) Permalink

7. Tikkun olam as commandment

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:07 (5 years ago) Permalink

7. anything heimische...

suggest bánh mi (suzy), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

8. Lady rabbis (in non-Orthodox movements)

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

9. All our base

the drummer from the hilarious 1990's Britpop act Gay Dad (wanko ergo sum), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

Tikkun olam is my favorite part of Judaism ever. Concept and metaphor equally awesome.

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:09 (5 years ago) Permalink

The Golders Green and St. Louis Park eruvs.

suggest bánh mi (suzy), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:09 (5 years ago) Permalink

10. sense of humor

cutty, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:11 (5 years ago) Permalink

what's the deal with "rabbi jose" btw

CNTFACE (omar little), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:29 (5 years ago) Permalink

11. Woody Allen movies

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:31 (5 years ago) Permalink

vicky cristina barcelona?

Blackout Crew are the Beatles of donk (jim), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

12. Tongue (not explicitly Jewish I know)

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

no thx

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:34 (5 years ago) Permalink

13. Philip Roth
14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)
15. Klezmer

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:35 (5 years ago) Permalink

14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)

^^^this

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:37 (5 years ago) Permalink

13. Philip David Lee Roth

fixed

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:38 (5 years ago) Permalink

Today there's a blessing you can make on the sun that can only be made like once every 25 years. That's pretty cool.

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:38 (5 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, klezmer wildly OTM but I find Roth totally 100% repellent.

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:39 (5 years ago) Permalink

according to the brooklyn paper this is only the 3rd time in history that the sun is in the same position during passover that it was when it was first created

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:39 (5 years ago) Permalink

^^^^ awesome

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:41 (5 years ago) Permalink

going to an orthodox seder as a favor to moms, not looking forward to it (mostly because it goes well past midnight, is an hour and a half away, and i have to work in the morning)

Ømår Littel (Jordan), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:45 (5 years ago) Permalink

One sucky thing about being Jewish: Often (like this Passover), the two days of Chag run into Shabbat, which means that observant Jews (including my family) will be keeping three days straight of no electricity and such. Almost everyone always secretly cheats around the second day to take showers.

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:46 (5 years ago) Permalink

You can take a shower, I thought, you just can't dry off? What if you stood with your arms out until you air dried?

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:48 (5 years ago) Permalink

Or put on a big fluffy bathrobe?

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:48 (5 years ago) Permalink

my dad is currently trying to make me feel guilty for not going to a sedar

iatee, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:53 (5 years ago) Permalink

according to the brooklyn paper this is only the 3rd time in history that the sun is in the same position during passover that it was when it was first created

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, April 6, 2009

you and i both know that there is no significance whatsoever to this, though. i read it in the paper.

he sounded italian enough to give me something (the schef (adam schefter ha ha)), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:54 (5 years ago) Permalink

what did the paper say?

Ømår Littel (Jordan), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:56 (5 years ago) Permalink

14. Tallits look comfy. Not so different from a snuggy.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:56 (5 years ago) Permalink

xxpost the significance is awesomeness

iatee, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:57 (5 years ago) Permalink

So kosher for pesach is stricter than regular kosher, right? That would explain why the jewish bagel store down the shops had a big sign saying "NONE OF OUR PRODUCTS ARE KOSHER FOR PASSOVER PLEASE NOTE" which I didn't quite understand til now.

I've said this before, but I'm fascinated by all these traditions and rituals in Judaism. It is very odd, now I think on it, but I grew up knowing absolute zero about Jewish culture. There just werent any orthodox jews in the city I grew up in. Where I live now OTOH is an area concentrated with mainly Hassids and Lubavicts (I think thats right?).

one art, please (Trayce), Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:06 (5 years ago) Permalink

having just finished six months of judaism class i'm ready to drop science at my gf's family's passover

CNTFACE (omar little), Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

hahaha... make sure you explain the whole "all the days of our lives" thing

s1ocki, Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:12 (5 years ago) Permalink

IDGI, why would you convert? save yourself time and money and get a nicer desk chair.

display name changed. (amateurist), Saturday, 7 June 2014 01:27 (2 months ago) Permalink

or some noise-cancelling headphones, those are good.

display name changed. (amateurist), Saturday, 7 June 2014 01:27 (2 months ago) Permalink

have I mentioned in this thread that I met my husband on JDate? HE IS NOT JEWISH BTW I mean I tried to marry in but was foiled.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Sunday, 8 June 2014 16:32 (2 months ago) Permalink

wait, you're not jewish and you married a non-jew but you're looking for a shul? and you were both on jdate?!

socki (s1ocki), Tuesday, 10 June 2014 17:09 (2 months ago) Permalink

quincie contains multitudes

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 10 June 2014 17:22 (2 months ago) Permalink

I failed at keeping kosher, if that helps.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Tuesday, 10 June 2014 17:45 (2 months ago) Permalink

well looks like we'll be enrolling little V in the Sunday "Judaism School" offered by the Reconstructionist Temple I mentioned somewhere upthread (Or Shalom). I only know one other family there but their girls know V from our preschool co-op and I like them a lot so we'll see how it goes.

One odd thing that came up was that my wife was surprised that we have to pay membership fees to join the Temple. My wife grew up in a Catholic family (although she never attended church, catechism, etc.) and thought this stuff was free. I kinda assumed the Catholic Church is probably about the only religious institution that can afford to offer services for free, but I don't really know how it works with other churches. I figured everybody's gotta tithe/pay dues (how else would anything get paid for), this can't just be a Jewish thing right?

Οὖτις, Monday, 16 June 2014 20:06 (2 months ago) Permalink

That had never occurred to me, but it makes sense. Synagogues are only loosely affiliated with central organizations (e.g. United Synagogue) and I don't think they are funded by them. I assume catholic churches get money from the big church.

Hier Komme Die Warum Jetzt (Hurting 2), Monday, 16 June 2014 20:22 (2 months ago) Permalink

the Catholic Church just owns so much shit, real estate, etc. but the vast majority of religious institutions aren't like that. most aren't even centralized the way the Church is.

Οὖτις, Monday, 16 June 2014 20:36 (2 months ago) Permalink

I'm more surprised to hear that catholic churches provide free sunday school

Hier Komme Die Warum Jetzt (Hurting 2), Monday, 16 June 2014 20:37 (2 months ago) Permalink

I'm not sure they do tbh. I don't know any Catholic parents sending their kids, and asking people who grew up going to Catholic School isn't really helpful since when does a kid ever know what costs money.

Οὖτις, Monday, 16 June 2014 20:45 (2 months ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

baruch dayan emes, r' zalman schachter-shalomi passed away

Mordy, Thursday, 3 July 2014 18:33 (1 month ago) Permalink

i always heard that he used to study w/ shlomo carlebach when both were students of the Lubavitcher Rebbe at 770

Mordy, Thursday, 3 July 2014 18:35 (1 month ago) Permalink

temple we're considering joining hosted a talk from this guy, which I consider a positive sign:

now I gotta figure out how much $$$ we can actually afford to join oy

Οὖτις, Wednesday, 16 July 2014 16:59 (1 month ago) Permalink

i always heard that he used to study w/ shlomo carlebach when both were students of the Lubavitcher Rebbe at 770

I knew he was old but I had no idea

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 18:29 (1 month ago) Permalink

never realized scheduling a wedding was so difficult. Shabbat + Daylight Savings Time = good luck

bnw, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 16:36 (1 month ago) Permalink

If you've spent most of your time lately thinking about Israel/Palestine, this is a good thing to watch

'arry Goldman (Hurting 2), Thursday, 7 August 2014 04:37 (3 weeks ago) Permalink

happy jewish valentine's day!

Mordy, Monday, 11 August 2014 22:47 (3 weeks ago) Permalink

great clip Hurting thx for posting

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 12 August 2014 20:42 (3 weeks ago) Permalink


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