HEY JEWS

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The Torah instructs a Jew not to eat (or even possess) chometz all seven days of Passover (Exodus 13:3). "Chometz" is defined as any of the five grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, and rye) that came into contact with water for more than 18 minutes. This is a serious Torah prohibition, and for that reason we take extra protective measures on Passover to prevent any mistakes.

Which brings us to another category of food called "kitniyot" (sometimes referred to generically as "legumes"). This includes rice, corn, soy beans, string beans, peas, lentils, peanuts, mustard, sesame seeds and poppy seeds. Even though kitniyot cannot technically become chometz, Ashkenazi Jews do not eat them on Passover. Why?

The Smak (Rabbi Moshe of Kouchi, 13th century, France) explains that products of kitniyot appear like chometz products. For example, it can be hard to distinguish between rice flour (kitniyot) and wheat flour (chometz). Therefore, to prevent confusion, all kitniyot was prohibited.

mizzell, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:40 (6 years ago) Permalink

I'm throwing myself in with the Sephardic camp this year.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

Take a Hot Dog
and make it Kosher

the drummer from the hilarious 1990's Britpop act Gay Dad (wanko ergo sum), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

Oh makes more sense, and yes, I know the story, but I'm wondering why go so much further than just bread, I mean, Matzah is just unleavened bread, still has wheat in it and all, it's not like they didn't have enough time to cook pasta when escaping Egypt.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:46 (6 years ago) Permalink

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

•--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:47 (6 years ago) Permalink

Which is to say, eating corn is a long ways away from letting bread rise.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:48 (6 years ago) Permalink

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

Don't eat that - EAT THIS

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 16:51 (6 years ago) Permalink

passover is a great holiday.
G R E A T

BUT, the Haggadahs have not arrived in the mail from my grandfather yet and I'm also getting a bit nervous about seating... also, anyone have a good veggie matzoh ball soup recipe? vegetarians certainly won't eat teh brisket.

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:55 (6 years ago) Permalink

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:58 (6 years ago) Permalink

apparently quinoa is ok.

mizzell, Monday, 6 April 2009 16:59 (6 years ago) Permalink

good to qui-know-a

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:00 (6 years ago) Permalink

Seven days of quinoa and matzah sounds . . . constipating.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:00 (6 years ago) Permalink

Can we turn this thread also into a list of all of the awesome things about being jewish in general?

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:01 (6 years ago) Permalink

1. Chosen people.
2. Latkes

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:02 (6 years ago) Permalink

3. Talmud

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

4. hot sabbath sex

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

5. Neuroses

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:04 (6 years ago) Permalink

6. control of the media/money

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

― quincie, Monday, April 6, 2009 11:58 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

This may explain my increased secularism that started around the time I became vegetarian.

mehlt, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:04 (6 years ago) Permalink

6. Noodle kugel

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:05 (6 years ago) Permalink

7. Tikkun olam as commandment

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:07 (6 years ago) Permalink

7. anything heimische...

suggest bánh mi (suzy), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

8. Lady rabbis (in non-Orthodox movements)

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

9. All our base

the drummer from the hilarious 1990's Britpop act Gay Dad (wanko ergo sum), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

Tikkun olam is my favorite part of Judaism ever. Concept and metaphor equally awesome.

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

The Golders Green and St. Louis Park eruvs.

suggest bánh mi (suzy), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

10. sense of humor

cutty, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:11 (6 years ago) Permalink

what's the deal with "rabbi jose" btw

CNTFACE (omar little), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:29 (6 years ago) Permalink

11. Woody Allen movies

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:31 (6 years ago) Permalink

vicky cristina barcelona?

Blackout Crew are the Beatles of donk (jim), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:32 (6 years ago) Permalink

12. Tongue (not explicitly Jewish I know)

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:32 (6 years ago) Permalink

no thx

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:34 (6 years ago) Permalink

13. Philip Roth
14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)
15. Klezmer

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:35 (6 years ago) Permalink

14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)

^^^this

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:37 (6 years ago) Permalink

13. Philip David Lee Roth

fixed

This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

Today there's a blessing you can make on the sun that can only be made like once every 25 years. That's pretty cool.

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, klezmer wildly OTM but I find Roth totally 100% repellent.

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:39 (6 years ago) Permalink

according to the brooklyn paper this is only the 3rd time in history that the sun is in the same position during passover that it was when it was first created

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:39 (6 years ago) Permalink

^^^^ awesome

ian, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:41 (6 years ago) Permalink

going to an orthodox seder as a favor to moms, not looking forward to it (mostly because it goes well past midnight, is an hour and a half away, and i have to work in the morning)

Ømår Littel (Jordan), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

One sucky thing about being Jewish: Often (like this Passover), the two days of Chag run into Shabbat, which means that observant Jews (including my family) will be keeping three days straight of no electricity and such. Almost everyone always secretly cheats around the second day to take showers.

Mordy, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:46 (6 years ago) Permalink

You can take a shower, I thought, you just can't dry off? What if you stood with your arms out until you air dried?

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:48 (6 years ago) Permalink

Or put on a big fluffy bathrobe?

guys i need to eliminate this business associate and im really nervous (Laurel), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:48 (6 years ago) Permalink

my dad is currently trying to make me feel guilty for not going to a sedar

iatee, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

according to the brooklyn paper this is only the 3rd time in history that the sun is in the same position during passover that it was when it was first created

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Monday, April 6, 2009

you and i both know that there is no significance whatsoever to this, though. i read it in the paper.

he sounded italian enough to give me something (the schef (adam schefter ha ha)), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:54 (6 years ago) Permalink

what did the paper say?

Ømår Littel (Jordan), Monday, 6 April 2009 17:56 (6 years ago) Permalink

14. Tallits look comfy. Not so different from a snuggy.

quincie, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:56 (6 years ago) Permalink

xxpost the significance is awesomeness

iatee, Monday, 6 April 2009 17:57 (6 years ago) Permalink

So kosher for pesach is stricter than regular kosher, right? That would explain why the jewish bagel store down the shops had a big sign saying "NONE OF OUR PRODUCTS ARE KOSHER FOR PASSOVER PLEASE NOTE" which I didn't quite understand til now.

I've said this before, but I'm fascinated by all these traditions and rituals in Judaism. It is very odd, now I think on it, but I grew up knowing absolute zero about Jewish culture. There just werent any orthodox jews in the city I grew up in. Where I live now OTOH is an area concentrated with mainly Hassids and Lubavicts (I think thats right?).

one art, please (Trayce), Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:06 (6 years ago) Permalink

having just finished six months of judaism class i'm ready to drop science at my gf's family's passover

CNTFACE (omar little), Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

hahaha... make sure you explain the whole "all the days of our lives" thing

s1ocki, Tuesday, 7 April 2009 00:12 (6 years ago) Permalink

why is that weird? provided that your point isn't simply your belief that theological declarations are weird. I mean I'm not gonna take the time to spell out Catholic theology here but the view is readily sensible within the Catholic tradition of thinking of the Church as a collective body ("body" in a organic sense, not just an extensional "set of people").

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 16:46 (2 months ago) Permalink

it's definitely weird, even from the Church's POV. that you can be saved through Christ and a part of the covenant with the Church through your rejection of Christ and the Church? that's why they call it a mystery.

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 16:48 (2 months ago) Permalink

ok yes if that's all you mean then fine, it is a mystery.gif. but Catholics talk about mystery every week.

since vatican 2 the Church does not take Jews to have rejected Christ. this is just spelling that out a little further. not up to "scientific precision" I guess but if that's the standard

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 16:53 (2 months ago) Permalink

how do they understand this in light of inerrancy of the NT and passages that seem to totally contradict the idea that the Jews did not reject Christ? it that part of the mystery?

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 16:57 (2 months ago) Permalink

fwiw i asked a professor friend in the field and he says: There is a huge literature of new readings of the NT that downplay the dualism of Jew vs Christian. Much of it relies of rhetorical criticism saying that the verse was based on a fight with a specific group of Jews and does not include Jews as a whole. Some of it is based on reconceptualization as to what a verse like that could mean to a Jewish speaker which the apostles were. There are many other strategies used to explain the texts. Texts like Revelation are the easy ones via rhetroical criticism, the lines in the Pauline texts are harder. But all of this is part and parcel of a broader modern reading of the Bible. The same was Hirsch or Hertz dealt with a score of issues including science with the net result is a modern reading of the Jewish Bible, the Catholic Church is dealing with a broad number of issues in their 21st century reading.

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:10 (2 months ago) Permalink

that seems otm. I would say that those readings go back to vatican 2 so aren't specifically 21st century but the point still stands.

think "inerrancy" is too strong an attribution to a historical text. Catholics aren't Muslims (or Protestants): the texts were written by human authors and they must be interpreted.

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:27 (2 months ago) Permalink

also re. "rejection": it is one thing to say something, and another to do something. the acts of the Jews are to be seen as in line with the NT, if not their words. putting a lot of emphasis on "belief", attitudes toward propositions, etc., is again a rather Protestant take on Christianity.

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:29 (2 months ago) Permalink

what is the status of the catholic canon? is it divinely inspired? do the pauline texts have more force than the later ones in terms of necessary fidelity?

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:29 (2 months ago) Permalink

what do you mean by "the catholic canon"? Augustine? Aquinas? Newman? papal declarations? there's not really anything equivalent to the Midrash or to hadiths.

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:31 (2 months ago) Permalink

i really meant the canonical NT

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:35 (2 months ago) Permalink

as seen by the catholic church

Mordy, Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:35 (2 months ago) Permalink

hmm then still confused, what do you mean by the texts later than Paul's?

I mean yeah the idea is that the texts are divinely inspired but that doesn't mean they're so clear that anyone who reads them will understand them right away. the latter view is what fundamentalists (by definition in fact) believe, and Catholics aren't fundamentalist.

droit au butt (Euler), Sunday, 13 December 2015 17:46 (2 months ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

my daughter's mixed media har sinai for parshat yisro

Mordy, Friday, 29 January 2016 18:48 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Sheep ❤️

petulant dick master (silby), Friday, 29 January 2016 19:23 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Oh wait those are clouds nm

petulant dick master (silby), Friday, 29 January 2016 19:24 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Mordy maybe you have thoughts on this: my daughter's gan is in a conservative synagogue, but her teacher is orthodox. I feel like sometimes the teacher is crossing the line into orthodox territory, for example telling them that boys wear tzitzit (or at least that's what K came home and told me -- maybe it was just because there's a boy in her class who wears them).

Also she talks to them a lot about "davening to Hashem" and I just feel like a threes class is a little early for that.

(1) Do you think it's appropriate? (2) Do you think it's pointless to say something to the director about it?

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, 29 January 2016 19:36 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

My girls go to a Chabad school so they're being exposed to all that and more and I've definitely had conversations with my 4yo about things we believe and how they might differ from what her morah said. I suspect my tolerance (and total acceptability) threshold for Orthodox hashkafa is much higher than yours in general, but we are not fully observant so she knows that we do some things differently than what they do at school. I feel like that some level of critical interaction about what they're getting at school is probably going to be necessary whether they continue in Jewish schools or go to the public schools (about which we are undecided). I should probably mention also that not all the Chabad teachers are Orthodox (my 2yo's is non-observant) so it's not even like they are only be exposed to one context for Jewishness at school either. Maybe they've taken pains to have it that way because they are trying to attract a broader student body, ie they don't see their target audience as homogenous even though they are definitely privileging certain Orthonorms.

Mordy, Friday, 29 January 2016 19:49 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

So I guess my answer is: I think it's probably fine but if it bothers you I imagine the conservative director will be sympathetic to your concern.

Mordy, Friday, 29 January 2016 19:51 (2 weeks ago) Permalink


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