pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

"sorry this is probably giving it much more thought than it wants"

i'd say the review was a success. made ya think - made ya think!

I'm down for hearing some PC Music, if anyone wants to post a link. I just thought the review said very little about the music itself and read more like a press release from OK Computer or something.

lots of music in the PS thing on PC that i linked to above:

http://pitchfork.com/thepitch/485-pc-music/

Maybe that slightly anachronistic Eurodance style is simply their preferred aesthetic delivery agent for their brand of distilled funhouse mirror euphoria?

I also think PC Music have breathed life into *something*, although I'm not sure what. Max Tundra was roused to recruit Daphne & Celeste (awesome song btw) almost certainly as a result of their activities

I like the misuse of auto-tune in these. It seems weird that auto-tune isn't mentioned at all in any of those articles.

You auto-tune the vocals to get them perfect and then you run them through again, crank up the displacement, and the result is that cool tape-warping effect.

i liked the review

is it autotune or melodyne? i think pc music seems more melodyne

new Pitchfork Review is out. best kenny rogers review ever!

https://scontent-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/11136776_10153906021667137_3064343674909503890_n.jpg?oh=d175808040ff4018088110842e380ca3&oe=55DE562E

recently looked up this weirdly brutal review of a perfectly fine record, hard to believe it came from 2012 rather than the early 00's.
http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/17136-mumps-etc/

Don't know where else to put this.

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/17499-destroyer-dream-lover/

"The saxophones on "Dream Lover" are not mournful, but exuberant. They don’t wander in, like a lonesome lush looking for last call. They leap out, as does Bejar, who’s at his Falstaffian apex. He’s romantic and rakish, singing about wind-swept adventures with his dream lover in that recognizably world weary voice, while peppering in a few bashful profanities. The music ascends toward a joyous conclusion, the saxophones squalling in indefatigable glee."

Isn't one of those saxophones actually a trumpet?

http://i493.photobucket.com/albums/rr296/Elomere/unforgivable.jpg

fuck people writing out their daydreams to describe music
vision ain't sound motherfuckers get a real job

lol i had no idea pitchfork prints a magazine now, did everybody here bitch about it for several days

I don't get how "minimalist" and "chaotic" are opposite

That was the most annoying phrase! Using the term "minimalist" just confuses things, like if that word was omitted you would have "PC Music sounds chaotic but is sneakily deliberate to the last distorted note" -- a totally clear statement.

The review has a lot of bad constructions like that. There will be several clear sentences and then things like:

if anyone’s really in drag here, it’s humans pretending to be avatars—the total elision of soul.

which is just clunky and awkward, and creates problems for itself by using terms like "drag" and "soul" which have specific connotations, like minimalism, which the writer just ignores because they like these provocative words more than communicating clearly? I dunno. I liked the phrase "chopped-up, anti-melodic spatter of brand names and robot garble" -- sounds like something i would like to listen to.

xp I'm not sure Falstaff is who that reviewer thinks he is. World weary?

http://pitchfork.com/news/59755-water-company-challenges-jay-zs-water-is-free-tidal-comments/

From The Pitch: "The Blues is, for all intents and purposes, dead. No one under the age of fifty writes about it or talks about it anywhere prominently."

don't trust anyone over fifty

http://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2015/05/beer.jpg?w=720&h=480&crop=1

That Pitch quote reads a lot better within its context: a long empathetic piece about the life and legacy of B.B. King

that quote is kinda true too.

Where exactly do people under 50 "talk prominently"?

also, AU CONTRARE: http://thoughtcatalog.com/devon-hartman/2014/11/you-have-to-stop-what-youre-doing-right-now-to-watch-this-dog-sing-the-blues/

"Where exactly do people under 50 "talk prominently"?"

taco bell. urban outfitters.

aol chatrooms

at least they tell me they're under 50

well maybe I'm wrong but it seems like their own contributor Amanda Petrusich received a fair amount of attention for 'Do Not Sell At Any Price', and his written a good bit on the blues-on Pitchfork.

Yeah but she's 53

Has music writing period created a bill Simmons like character since ... Chuck klosterman? Serious q

Who it should be noted doesn't even write about music

Any more

We're in a doomed and dying industry, no one cares about your opinion and good taste is worthless; people rely on those already in their network for recommendations, or maybe a spotify compilation. The functional purpose of music writing at this point is news writing, celebrity writing, and that's ... Literally it. At least as far as a large audience is concerned. All you can really do is be a good enough writer that people want to read you on those grounds by building your own micro audience

I don't know that I even 100% believe that but i think having any expectations beyond that could only lead to disappointment

have you considered law school?

Not even for a second

Im being a lil flippant ppl care about your opinion and good taste isn't really worthless, it's all just scaled down drastically

Virtually no one, not actually no one

The functional purpose of music writing at this point is news writing, celebrity writing, and that's ... Literally it.

I think this is otm actually, which is why so much "music" writing these days has little to nothing to do with actual music and mostly has to do with the artist's narrative/story arc (to which music is an incidental element)

which bugs me personally but it is interesting in terms of audiences and how they consume music - the stories that interest audiences are no longer really in the songs themselves, they're in the career arcs of the performers (which can be made up of songs + other stuff)

maybe it was always that way, to some extent, and it's just been accelerated/taken to extremes given the explosion of digital content idk

The functional purpose of music writing at this point is to create places on the internet where an artist's name appears, and then trick people into clicking on it

ok but why people click on it is only partly about the music, it's more about "I am interested in the story of this person's life"

then why are 95% of music features about boring people?

whiney, do you think deej would make a good lawyer, y or n?

well, boring is relative

xp

i don't think any judge would tolerate his constant defense of "why are you all attacking my client all the time?"

lol

i think his persistence and semantic focus would make him a good lawyer