Defend The Indefensible: The Beautiful South

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How does the bridge go?

Perhaps I have forgotten it.

the bridgefox, Monday, 18 August 2003 15:35 (twenty years ago) link

don't marry her is a pam ayres poem set to music

(i quite like it actually)

zebedee (zebedee), Monday, 18 August 2003 15:59 (twenty years ago) link

Unless anyone can describe this bridge I am going to continue in, or with, my assumption that it does not exist.

the sternfox, Monday, 18 August 2003 21:17 (twenty years ago) link

hmmm Jerry ... I wasn't *intending* to cover that on my new blog (yeah, hushed up and all that) but now you've mentioned it ... :).

I suppose I quite like "A Little Time". the South's later stuff is horrendous.

robin carmody (robin carmody), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 04:17 (twenty years ago) link

i can think of a few bands who could cover "song for whoever" and mean every word

electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 04:20 (twenty years ago) link

It's true - 'A Little Time' is not their worst.

the timefox, Tuesday, 19 August 2003 08:12 (twenty years ago) link

I am sorry all you haterz . . . Beautiful South are ace. And I'll tell you fer why.

I used to ADORE the Beautiful South . . . funny and witty and tunes. Good songs sung well . . . what more could you want?

Their pinnicle is the Blue is the Colour album. It is, without doubt, one of THE darkest albums ever made. But it's not dark in a dead-of-night kinda way . . . it's dark in a grey-day kinda way. You know . . . when the day is so boring, so bad, and so terrible, life looks like its viewed through a monochrome TV set with the contrast turned right down. The songs are great individually, but brilliant together, creating a kind of middle-class darkness thats far more convincing than your usual feel-my-pain Pink Floyd derived proclamations.

It least, that's what I thought at the time.

I listened to this album about a fortnight ago . . . it's still not bad. The full impact has been lost over time, but it's still good rousing stuff, especially Have Fun and Mirror, and Blackbird on a Wire is a lovely, lovely song.

Even if everything else they've done is a dud (which it isn't - Red Eyes is Back and Song for Whoever, despite the tweeness, are great songs) this album redeems them. Indefensible? Hardly.

Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 10:31 (twenty years ago) link

Johnney B: perhaps *you* can persuade us that there is a bridge in 'Don't Marry Her'

the pinefox, Tuesday, 19 August 2003 10:39 (twenty years ago) link

Yeh, I remember a middle 8.

"And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay" . . . that bit.

Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 10:44 (twenty years ago) link

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's the CHORUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the structurefox, Tuesday, 19 August 2003 11:06 (twenty years ago) link

Here is the complete lyric.

As far as I can see it contains no bridge - ie. no third element that departs from the see-saw of verse and chorus.

Admittedly, though, I cannot instantly hear a tune when I look at all of these lines. Some of them are a touch ungainly.

I do not care for the obscenities, either.

DON'T MARRY HER

Think of you with pipe and slippers
Think of her in bed
Laying there just watching telly
Then think of me instead

I'll never grow so old and flabby
That could never be
Don't marry her, fuck me

And your love light shines like cardboard
But your work shoes are glistening
She's a PhD in "I told you so"
You've a knighthood in "I'm not listening"

She'll grab your sweaty bollocks
Then slowly raise her knee
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay
And you realise you can't make it anyway
You have to wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me

Those lovely Sunday mornings
With breakfast brought in bed
Those blackbirds look like knitting needles
Trying to peck your head

Those birds will peck your soul out
And throw away the key
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the kitchen's always tidy
And the bathroom's always clean
She's a diploma in "just hiding things"
You've a first in "low esteem"

When your socks smell of angels
But your life smells of Brie
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay
And you realise you can't make it anyway
You have to wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay
And you realise you can't make it anyway
You have to wash the car
Take the kiddies to the park
Don't marry her, fuck me

the pinefox, Tuesday, 19 August 2003 11:12 (twenty years ago) link

Is it? I didn't think it had a chorus.

I thought it was lots of verses punctuated by an occasional middle 8.

If you aren't that bothered by the lyrics, you'd find it a bit tedious, I guess. But why does the absence of a middle 8 necessarily make it boring? Lots of cool songs don't have a middle 8 (or a chorus, depending on your point of view)

Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 11:13 (twenty years ago) link

Yes, they do (or, yes, they don't. cf Kogan).

But this song needs more musical variation than it has. As it stands I find it unbelievably pedestrian. That's leaving aside the lyrical problems.

the pinefox, Tuesday, 19 August 2003 13:32 (twenty years ago) link

Yeh, this song does need a little more in the tune department. The whole album is, to my mind, designed to hang the lyrics off. So the absence of a chorus comes from the absence of any chorusey lyrics. Not that that's any excuse, mind.

I think it's better on the album than as a stand-alone track. As a gentle introduction into the fug, it's great, but as a stand alone track, it can be a little dull.

"Don't marry her, fuck me" isn't half as good as "Don't marry her, have me", either. The latter is too shocking, too callous - the former is vague and subversive. It would underpin the albums "Where have all the morals gone?" theme better than the version taht eventually ended up on there.

Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 14:39 (twenty years ago) link

you got the former and latter mixed up surely?

stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 16:23 (twenty years ago) link

Ah yes, latter and former mixed up.

You get what I mean though. I'm a fighter, not a writer!

Johnney B (Johnney B), Wednesday, 20 August 2003 10:30 (twenty years ago) link

two years pass...
I rather like The Beautiful South - ESPECIALLY their output after "Carry on up The Charts". "Quench" is gold, "Blue is the Colour" is brilliant. Everything AFTER "Painting It Red", however, does tend to disappoint.

Also, I'm in America - where you have to turn over a lot of stones to find anyone even remotely familiar with The Beautiful South.

-Eric

The Hideous North, Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:52 (eighteen years ago) link

I am the kind of guy who might be expected to like that kind of stuff. As for whether I actually do or not, I dunno. Basically I neither like nor dislike them. They just are there. Some nice songs, but there are so many that write so much better and more harmonically and melodically interesting songs within the same genre.

The first Housemartins album was great, but after that: Nothing much.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Monday, 16 January 2006 02:23 (eighteen years ago) link

Some of their stuff is awesome. AWESOME.

Some of their stuff is crap. CRAP.

It's like a lucky dip without the cellophane.

ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!! (ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!!), Monday, 16 January 2006 02:25 (eighteen years ago) link

And by the way, "Don't Marry Her" does too have a middle 8. It's just not very flashy. It starts at 2 min. 15 sec.

-The Hideous North

The Hideous North, Tuesday, 17 January 2006 04:49 (eighteen years ago) link

ten months pass...
Esteban is the most OTMFM poster on this thread. Tom's original post is comically wrong.

My Life in the Ghost of Bush (noodle vague), Sunday, 19 November 2006 02:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Actually pretty much everybody on here who slags off the Beautiful South does so in terms of their own crapness.

My Life in the Ghost of Bush (noodle vague), Sunday, 19 November 2006 02:12 (seventeen years ago) link

DO YOU HEAR ME EWING? THE GREATEST FUCKING BAND THAT EVER LIVED YOU SNIFFY SMOTHERFUGGER!! YA HEAR ME>>>????? YOU DIE!!!! YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE!!!!!!!

Actually if you read your original post I'm sure you'd be be ashamed at its presumptuous, exuberant, bolloxicity.

Domino Man (noodle vague), Sunday, 19 November 2006 03:34 (seventeen years ago) link

At least The Beautiful South are not The Beautiful South-Martins... a tribute band I saw advertised in Newcastle

raw sweaters annoying brother (raw sweaters annoying brother), Sunday, 19 November 2006 04:01 (seventeen years ago) link

There used to be one called The Beautiful Couch in Hull.

I'd like to withdraw the vehemence of last night's statement but retain the sentiment.

Through a twenty deep screen of humourists (noodle vague), Sunday, 19 November 2006 11:55 (seventeen years ago) link

I still stand by my post from January with the rider of "keep the first album and the decent songs from Carry On Up The Charts only".

wordy rappaport (EstieButtez1), Sunday, 19 November 2006 14:14 (seventeen years ago) link

0898 is the best of the lot. First 4 are more or less flawless, after that a lot less so, I guess.

Through a twenty deep screen of humourists (noodle vague), Sunday, 19 November 2006 14:21 (seventeen years ago) link

The last three tracks of 0898 totally ruin it for me, despite the presence of "Old Red Eyes is Back" AND "36D".

wordy rappaport (EstieButtez1), Sunday, 19 November 2006 14:47 (seventeen years ago) link

six months pass...

The Beautiful South invented indie.

Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:03 (sixteen years ago) link

Or at least what we nowadays see as "indie" in the top 40, Diet Coke Zero-drinking, Tim Lovejoy-quoting ViewPigeonDetectivesKaiserChiefsRazorlightMilburn bands. Britpop as influencing modern indie is the biggest music critic red herring ever invented. 80s indie influnces + "I am soooooo drunk" lyrics + hoolie appreciation = both.

Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:04 (sixteen years ago) link

i remember quite liking paul heaton's solo album thing he did in 2001.

CharlieNo4, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:09 (sixteen years ago) link

Something about biscuits and asylum seekers, yes?

Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:09 (sixteen years ago) link

i agree with tom that the beautiful south are the worst band ever produced by britain. they're the aural equivalent of that time travelling sitcom that starred nicholas lyndhurst and the fat guy from 'bread'. or 'my hero'.
-- pulpo, Monday, 18 August 2003 09:24 (3 years ago) Bookmark Link

that makes them sound like the second best band ever thou. the best band ever would sound like "the piglet files".

acrobat, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:11 (sixteen years ago) link

The Beautiful South invented Belle & Sebastian but that's about it. Unfortunately.

DavidM, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:13 (sixteen years ago) link

There was that letter into the NME in about 1998 that was just a list of Beautiful South/B&S similarities. They lost me about the same time they claimed that "A Perfect 10" and "String Bean Jen" were basically the same song.

Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:14 (sixteen years ago) link

That's pretty small.

Mark G, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:18 (sixteen years ago) link

"Song for Whoever" may be the smuggest song ever as well. Not sure if that's "in a good way".

Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 14:21 (sixteen years ago) link

They were great when Brianna was there ("Would you still love me if I lost my legs?"= classic!) but after that I totz stopped paying attention...I hate that new chick.

django, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 16:41 (sixteen years ago) link

Indefensible? C'mon, the first four albums are full of gems. I loved the whole iron fist in a velvet glove thing. Lyrical bile presented in a public-friendly muzak style. And it sold! I just bought the BBC Sessions, lots of their best tracks. They lost me after -Miaow- though.

Mr. Odd, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 17:26 (sixteen years ago) link

Paul Heaton's, Dave Rotheray's and Sean Welch's audio commentary on the Munch DVD is one of the most entertaining I've ever heard (the videos themselves though are almost all complete shite, which kind of helped).

DavidM, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 19:01 (sixteen years ago) link

This is definitely a question that means something different in the US than in the UK. In the US they've just been another British indie band that never sold very well, but that a few Anglophiliac college kids dug. (I was one of in the early 1990s.) The voices aren't remarkably bad...I'd even say they're great compared to the competition at that level of UK import at the time (e.g. Charlatans, Soup Dragons). I still love the first record, esp. "From Under the Covers", which inexplicably utterly destroyed me when I moved far from home to college. "36D", "We Are Each Other", the cover of "Girlfriend" on the first record...these are catchy, bouncy pop. From what I'm seeing on the thread the band comes with a lot of cultural baggage in the UK, but I don't think this ever translated over here (thankfully).

Euler, Wednesday, 23 May 2007 19:03 (sixteen years ago) link

two years pass...

"Song for Whoever" may be the smuggest song ever as well. In a great way.

"too worldly to compete on /b/" (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 24 June 2009 10:23 (fourteen years ago) link

By the way, if you thought Heaton or anyone who wrote songs was the problem: http://www.newbeautifulsouth.co.uk/

"too worldly to compete on /b/" (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 24 June 2009 10:26 (fourteen years ago) link

nine months pass...

I'd kind of forgotten how great "My Book" and "We Are Each Other" are.

HI DERE, Friday, 23 April 2010 17:57 (fourteen years ago) link

My mind is kinda blown at noting Lex talking about how he doesn't mind them way upthread!

Ned Raggett, Friday, 23 April 2010 17:59 (fourteen years ago) link

this revive was spawned by a coworker IMing me "What was that song that started 'I love you from the bottom of my pencil case'?" and me going on a Youtube binge shortly thereafter

HI DERE, Friday, 23 April 2010 18:00 (fourteen years ago) link

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welcome_to_the_Beautiful_South

also I'd never seen the alternate album cover, lololol

HI DERE, Friday, 23 April 2010 18:01 (fourteen years ago) link

"prevent the hoards of impressionable young fans from blowing their heads off in a gun-gobbling frenzy, or taking up smoking"

Indeed.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 23 April 2010 18:03 (fourteen years ago) link

I am hoping that isn't a US/UK spelling thing and that they really do mean hoards of fans

HI DERE, Friday, 23 April 2010 18:07 (fourteen years ago) link

The New Beautiful South have changed their name to 'The South'.
You can find The South at www.thesouth.uk.com
Its all about the songs!

Thank you

Blecch Generation (James Redd and the Blecchs), Friday, 23 April 2010 18:16 (fourteen years ago) link


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