i'm in an airport

Las Vegas is indeed a huge, glittering dump.

Did you ever get out of LV?

I am concerned that next saturday's BOS-ONT with a 40 minute connect in DFW is going to go horribly wrong and flightstats.com doesn't give me much hope.

Sky Harbor now, SeaTac later and then again tomorrow morning, Hartsfield tomorrow afternoon. Sweet sweet upgrade for today's flight.

woah you are all over the place!

lol 4 hour delay

at chilli's though XD

Now that I'm safe and sound at home, and rested, I can relay the most awkward moment of the trip.

I had in my possession a portable blow-up toilet seat, AKA a neck support ring thingy. I had never used it before, but I've also never been able to sleep on a plane before, so I thought it was worth a shot.

As soon as I got on the Las Vegas>Philly plane and took my window seat, I dug it out of my bag and blew it up, tried it on. It was awkward, uncomfortable, and scratched my neck a little. Plus I looked like an injured dog. So I took it off.

A bit later, a husband and wife team sat down beside me. After about 10 minutes, we had not made eye contact or spoken, so in the interest of civility I decided to offer the lady my toilet seat head supporter. She graciously accepted, and then we had a minute of back-and-forth as I made lame jokes about the likelihood of passing out as you blow up the ring, and about how maybe that's how they really are supposed to work. She played with the ring for a minute and then put into her back-of-the-seat pouch.

About an hour into the flight (delayed, so it ended up being 1am-8am or so), it was lights out and everyone was trying to catch some Zs on seats that adjusted from an "L" shape to maybe a 96 degree angle. Apparently everyone else is really good at this skill, but I am not. I was restless and going crazy in the silence. The lady to my left and her husband were fucking KNOCKED OUT - without wearing the ring. I kept looking at the ring I had offered her. Was it worth another shot? But I had clearly given it to her, and said something like "Don't worry, I'll definitely never use it again, it's all yours." At the same time, she was snoring.

So I reached for it and took it back. As I blew it up as quietly as I could, she suddenly woke up. Then her husband woke up. And then there I was, trying to sleep with the ring on, and failing. I'm pretty sure none of the three of us slept again the rest of the night. I kept adjusting and readjusting, and so did she, but I'm pretty sure I heard some quiet talk about how I had the ring. They also may have been talking about my massive B.O., because I hadn't showered in 3 1/2 days by that point.

I have to go on a bike ride now. The rest of the story is about how I struggled with giving it back or keeping it, and also about how it's possible that the lady never even noticed.

haha that sounds like pretty standard air travel except i'd never offer the ring even if i didn't want to use it at that moment because hey, you never know. i HATE being locked in by ppl sleeping. this is why i prefer aisle seats, even though it's easier to sleep if you can lie your head against the window.

a portable blow-up toilet seat

Took me a few to parse this in context.

You weren't the only one.

i was curious to find out how the blow-up aspect of your ring would turn out!

http://img364.imageshack.us/img364/3160/lw2toiletoz8.jpg

soooooooo bored

sargnt88: penis
SmarterChild: Let's talk about something else.

LOL

My turn again, heathrow 5 -FK although now I have graduated to BA silver Club I get to use the lounge so I have mixed myself a complementary negroni, I have a cheese plate and I am contemplating the awfulness of BA's muzak choice.

See that's how I want to travel.

I'm now in a delayed plane, they are hunting for two missing passengers and will soon be hunting for their bags in the hold. I don't understand this, short of keeling over how do people fail to make it to the gate, clearly they are in the terminal somewhere.

drunk

mmmm negroni! wait so they have open bar where you make your own drinks?

Stuck in ATL for 4 more hours (been here for 2, earlier flights too full to standby for, interviews over early, etc etc etc). No free wifi here, but desks w/ power outlets every 2 or 3 gates. The Crown Club sounds awfully tempting - wonder if they do a day pass.

HI DERE I R HEATROW AIPRORT AGAIN

Now in Boston Logan, in the admiral's club which suck compared to the BA exec lounge. No free booze for starters, half the power points don't work and no free wireless.

Yup tza, free bar and mix your own in BA lounges. Us Europeans get some things so right.

heading out to california, via DFW, connection is 40 minutes, I am sceptical that this going to work.

Good luck Ed, hope it all falls right in line. I was never so glad to get home after that ATL flight. You can buy a large bag of peanut M&Ms on Delta now for $2, btw.

All fell into line and even the bags made it. Was touch an go when someone in Row 21 started 'exhibiting symptoms of a heart attack' as we rolled up to the gate but we dashed down to the other end of terminal B and the ONT flight was slightly delayed. Even our bags made it.

Amazing!

There was a Dell Inspiron (lappy) in the trash outside security as I was going thru.

I can't really say I blame whoever tossed it.

Waiting for my flight north from John Wayne. An hour to go. Hmm hmm.

too bad you'll have to miss enuff z'nuff/pretty boy floyd/bulletboys at the roxy tomorrow.

I weep!

ONT again to SEA. Took far to long to find petrol for the rentao car so now everything is cut pretty fine. As it stands still on the shuttle bus from Hertz.

In SFO for a few more minutes before heading to Monterey. Beautiful views of the fog coming in over the hills, and you can see what I see by checking the most recent Flickr shot

Are you in SEA for long Ed?

Only till saturday, and to be fair in Everett, visiting my girlfriend's family, she has not really been back in 10 years; other wise I would say drink's woo etc.

Had a Dick's hamburger on Broadways last night which apparently was the thing to do and was a pretty good burger.

Did you put tartar sauce on it?

Mustard, ketchup and those pickled onions and it had a lot of tasty goop on it but no tartar sauce. Good shakes although the chocolate shake at the in n out won by a nose.

i have to go to the airport tonight. I HATE FLYING.

In JFK again for the wee pecker plane to MPLS, way too early as nothing went wrong on my way down here.

I like flying but I like it more if there's turbulence. I have three action movies and Stand by Me to watch on my ipod along with 5 episodes of "No Reservations", which is good because altogether I will be in FOUR DIFFERENT AIRPORTS TOMORROW. Fuck me. Those flights damn well better be on time.

where you goin, laurel?

I like flying but I like it more if there's turbulence

Ay-yi-yi, complete opposite with me. I like flying but even some small turbulence = ARGH.

Unexcitingly, I'm only going to Michigan! By way of Milwaukee and Kansas City, I guess. Hurrah.

Also, I'm about 80% sure I sprained my ankle today (it's been iced and wrapped already), so getting through four airports to make late connections ought to be hilarious. HELLO, SKYCAB?

Why do people think sucking face on the airtrain at 8:30 am is ok?

Omg what is this foul new perfume that every person in my vicinity seems to be wearing 3 gallons of?

Almost wasn't allowed to check in after kiosk malfunction and cutting it way too close to departure time. Now on plane :) but I really wish there'd been time for coffee :(

Sitting in buffalo for over an hour bc my parents are paranoid about long check-ins. Check in, bag and security took <5 min.

Drinky time then.

Sitting in buffalo for over an hour bc my parents are paranoid about long check-ins. Check in, bag and security took <5 min.

-- tehresa, Tuesday, September 2, 2008 11:20 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

this is such an old person thing!! my parents and my friends parents are always like "well if your flight is at 1:15 you should probably be there by 11 AM" and really the only response is "lol u old"