Yippee-IA, Motherf***ers! IRRATIONALLY ANGRY PT. 2: Irrationally Angrier

Select-a-size paper towel segments are exactly the right size for my most common paper towel use cases. If it's not enough I tear off two or more at once and then it is enough. Select-a-size gives all users options; regular limits options.

The smallest size is never enough for me (I'm very messy) And I typically do a one handed grab and rip, which never rips off the size that I need.

I wrap up my used coffee grounds in a paper towel before they go in the garbage, but with select-a-size this requires two sheets which then split in the middle at the perforation leaving coffee grounds all over my kitchen. No thanks!

If I want less paper than a standard sheet I just rip off a piece; I never thought of that as a problem before.

You should stop wrapping coffee grounds in paper towels. Invite the crows they attract in for dinner.

Cleaning up after the crows requires a larger towel as well

Coincidentally I bought select-a-size last week for the first time ever and my o/h just commented on what an amazing step on the ladder of progress they were.
we're british btw

When paper towels were invented I'm sure there was research done to determine the ideal size of a single sheet, which is the size they've come in ever since, no matter what brand it is. This new format only provides an illusion of usefulness.

Select-a-size is like going to a bar and suddenly they're serving beer in six ounce glasses.

i hate select-a-size

just give me a damn square ffs

Love select-a-size. Small version perfect for blowing nose, wrapping hot dog for microwave or dabbing at something.

Ok I never understood this, what if u want to blow your nose but the big towel is next up? You obviously have to tear it off and set it aside, & ain't nobody got time for that.

What? They're not randomly placed. They're all perforated small size ones. The size depends upon how many you take.

It would make life interesting if they were randomly placed.

oh dear what is wrong with me

I guess all paper towel rolls are "select-a-size" when you get right down to it.

yeah, I am confused. Ive never heard of this and was thinking the sheets were perforated in quarters, but;

http://www.brawny.com/~/media/CPG/Brawny/Products/PAS/PAS.ashx

Um, this is just "if you want a bigger sheet, tear it off in threes"?

Correct.

Ok, stuff that uses the Statue of Liberty as an icon of NYC. (1) it's corny (2) it's ugly (3) it's not even *in* the city (I mean technically it is but it's on its own little island), (4) it's not even visible from many parts of the city

1. Statue of Liberty
2. Red Apple
3. Taxi Cab
4. Empire State Building
5. Ice Skating Rink

These are the five things that attracted millions from around the world.

1. Hollywood Sign
2. Star on Sidewalk
3. Surfer
4. Girl with lipstick bending over from GTA poster
5. Capitol Records Building

1. Sears Tower
2. No wait, it's the Willis Tower now.
3. John Hancock Building?
4. Corncob Building from that Wilco album
5. Wrigley Field.

1-5. MUSEUM OF SCIENCE AND INDUSTRY, DUH.

1. Cowboy
2. Oil Derrick
3. Rocket ship
4. Astrodome
5. A single five-pointed star.

1. Liberty Bell
2. Benjamin Franklin
3. American flag with 13 stars
4. Dying AIDS victim on witness stand
5. Statue of Liberty

1, Double-decker bus
2. Buckingham Palace (that's the long steepled building by the river, right?)
3. Big Ben
4. Union Jack
5. Ginger Spice giving the peace sign with a wink.

that's the long steepled building by the river, right?)

Buckingham Palace isn't by the river, think you're thinking of the Houses of Parliament

i am taking online training on ladder safety (loooooool). it's not a big deal, just a 10-minute module kind of thing. but the little Test Your Knowledge sections are so inane and frequently just wrong. like this:

Test your knowledge. Select True or False.

A ladder safety device is any device, including a cage or well, designed to eliminate or reduce the possibility of accidental falls.

True False

i chose "TRUE".

Incorrect.
A ladder safety device is any device, other than a cage or well, designed to eliminate or reduce the possibility of accidental falls and may incorporate such features as:

- Body harnesses
- Friction brakes
- Sliding attachments
- Landing platforms

but the statement they initially provided WAS true! if someone says "Earth is the third planet from the sun", it's true. you can't say "Incorrect. Earth is the third planet from the sun...and it has people that are forced to take online training modules on ladder safety."

http://i.imgur.com/qJUWi.png

The first one says "including a cage or well", and the second one says "other than a cage or well", so that's where you were wrong, I think? NO CAGEY WELLS.

Despite all my rage I'm still just a well in a cage

yeah, a friend of mine clued me in a few minutes ago. sigh. the question made me so irrationally angry that i immediately sent it to friends and family. and now **I** am the fool, because now everyone knows that i didn't notice that it shifted from "including" to "other than", AND i've revealed that i thought a cage or well is a ladder safety device! how is a cage not a ladder safety device? i'm never going to be allowed to use ladders again.

Buckingham Palace isn't by the river, think you're thinking of the Houses of Parliament

Hmmm. Well I'm not sure why you all make the Queen live in the Houses of Parliament, but what do I know.

also, i have some bad news about those buses...

I'm wondering how many ladder deaths occur due to a inflated sense of safety from using cages and wells. Anyway, a dad from a family at my high school died from falling off a ladder at home. Ladders are dangerous.

What is a ladder well?

It's that thing where you put a ladder in a well for the sake of stability. The heights you're capable of reaching in this situation are often compromised by the depth of the well. Similarly, the efficacy of using a ladder in a cage is often adversely affected by the savagery of the creature being kept in the cage and its ability to scale a ladder to eat you.

^

T/F: You should build a moat around your ladder for defense purposes.

Ok I should have figured out ladder cage.

Incorrect. You should build a moat around your ladder for cautionary purposes.

moat can be a verb, apparently. you can moat a ladder.

Clearly Z S you are not fit for the American workforce.

xp You can ladder a moat, too! What a country!

Ladder cages seem like they make the apparatus less safe. Like, one could get lazy and just lean back on the cage while climbing, eventually snagging something and falling to their deaths.

But, at least being able to lock the end of the cage would keep bodies from falling on the other crew members, so I give them credit for that.

North Carolina driving IA: at dusk a lot of drivers turn on only their parking lights. They're not daytime running light, but yellow/red parking lights. But why?? Why not just turn on the actual headlights when you're driving in the dusk? What is gained by the incremental artificial lighting?

And I'm proactively IA about people going "I've never seen that" as though that means it's not happening.

I've never heard anyone say that.

I see it all the time and it makes me IA too. People do this a lot too in the day time but when it's rainy, which is even worse.

I've seen it too.

I was just thinking about weird regional differences like that. How in Missouri, drivers on a rural highway will ease on to the shoulder and make their right turn from there while we Arkansans still turn from the road, making everyone behind us slow down.

Thank you nickn and pp. pp, I actually figured you'd understand.

Some other NC crap: the NC dept of transportation made a couple of widespread dubious changes since I was here a few months ago, first, adding flashing yellow arrows (meaning turn left when oncoming traffic allows) for left-turn lanes that previously had no arrows at all, only solid red/yellow/green - more distracting and confusing than helpful.

The other is putting traffic circles at rural intersections instead of stop signs. People around here seriously haven't mastered 4-way stop and have never even imagined a traffic circle so meeting at one is cause for worry. Really I'm not used to traffic circles either so I ponder and doubt whatever action I take at one. My brother said the one by his house is the site of fender benders a few times a week.

I've seen the parking light thing, too. Actually when I was learning to drive, I was taught to do that!!! It wasn't until daytime running lights became a thing that I figured it would be better to just put the lights on all the way since everybody else does it (because they have daytime running lights).

• Sort of with you on the flashing yellow arrows, sort of not. I accept them as a distant cousin of those old flashing caution lights you'd see at the intersection of a bypass and Main Street in some podunk town. Better than green because it emphasizes caution. Better than red since you can actually drive through it. Distracting as fuck though.

• Traffic circles are awesome. There's nothing stupider than having to come to a dead stop at a four-way in the middle of nowhere. Dumbasses will get the hang of it eventually.

I used to see the parking light thing more often before daytime lights came along. Always reminds me of the trolling lights recreational fishing boats use at night, with the blue on one side and the red on the other. One of those things where the intention is well-meaning, if not completely useless in fact.