"if you put her in a T-shirt or you put her in a bustier, she's sexy in both. She's got double D's! You can't cover those suckers up!"

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Ze technical term for young Zhessica's brreasts is "humoungus melons".
I am an expert and haf a Phd in Boobiez Studies from California University.

― Professer von Koppafeal., Monday, 13 June 2005 02:16 (eighteen years ago) link

ten months pass...

They're probably Ds...very round...firm D-Cups...
*has pleasant feelings*

― lookthatthoseteats!!!, Thursday, 4 May 2006 23:04 (seventeen years ago) link

You're not Russian, by any chance.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 4 May 2006 23:08 (seventeen years ago) link

"conclusion: he doesn't. :)"

When Joe Simpson jerks off, Jessica has double ds.

― js (honestengine), Friday, 5 May 2006 01:03 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, wrinkleboobs.

― StanM (StanM), Friday, 5 May 2006 03:23 (seventeen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Jessica Simpson has a D-Cup. It's a little small, but it's a D-Cup nonetheless. So there.

― ChestWatch, Thursday, 25 May 2006 23:31 (seventeen years ago) link

so how do you get from preaching to a congregation to negotiating photo shoot contracts for your teenaged daughter with maxim?

in all seriousness, Joe Simpson was a Youth Minister before he said fuck it and started pimping his daughter. its pretty different from being an actual pastor or minister or other such leader of a congregation.

― grady (grady), Thursday, 25 May 2006 23:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Joe Simpson was a Youth Minister before he said fuck it and started pimping his daughter. its pretty different from being an actual pastor or minister or other such leader of a congregation.

No kidding. Youth pastors are always seemingly picked by how "with it" they are and have a knack for corny irreverence. I remember going to a Christian teens thing once and the pastor made some playfully awful sex joke, the disclaimer was that it involved a wife and husband.

and lol@ "suckers"

― Cunga (Cunga), Friday, 26 May 2006 00:06 (seventeen years ago) link

i have several family members who went to "reputable christian colleges" and the difference between telling someone you are a Theology major and telling someone you are a Youth Ministries major is like the difference between saying you're Pre-Med and saying you're P.E.

point being, its not like Joe Simpson went straight from being all Holy Joe reputable spiritual leader to saying the kind of thing in this thread's title. Its more like he went from getting his paycheck from a church to getting his paycheck from a record label.

― grady (grady), Friday, 26 May 2006 00:48 (seventeen years ago) link

Well boobies look different if you are 1.) lying down 2.) pre-menstrual 3.) on the pill. All of these things can change a person's boobs a whole cup size. I know cuz I am WOMAN. And all these guys on here who think they're experts....yeah right, like you're in Victoria's Secret with your tape measures, and you are DA EXPERTS. Women lie about boobs just like men lie about their cocks. Big enough for ya?

― Maria Snowe, Friday, 26 May 2006 02:46 (seventeen years ago) link

Do go on.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 26 May 2006 02:53 (seventeen years ago) link

"cuz I am WOMAN"

― cave people post here now? (Kim), Friday, 26 May 2006 02:56 (seventeen years ago) link

W-O-M-A-N
I'll say it again

― I Hate You Little Girls (noodle vague), Friday, 26 May 2006 07:37 (seventeen years ago) link

three years pass...

Jessica Simpson has a D-Cup. It's a little small, but it's a D-Cup nonetheless. So there.

― ChestWatch, Thursday, May 25, 2006 7:31 PM

― ☀ ☃ (am0n), Saturday, 10 April 2010 20:42 (fourteen years ago) link

Professor Von Koppafeal for mod

― cousin itt (Whiney G. Weingarten), Saturday, 10 April 2010 21:30 (fourteen years ago) link

ChestWatch for mod

― steev reich (Curt1s Stephens), Saturday, 10 April 2010 21:33 (fourteen years ago) link

I am an expert and haf a Phd in Boobiez Studies from California University.

I was waiting for the "Carnegie Mellon University" joke and I left disappointed.

― fukkin magnets (ecuador_with_a_c), Saturday, 10 April 2010 21:42 (fourteen years ago) link

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