X Factor (UK) 2014

by judges' houses we were already discussing whether fish or shoes was more likely to go through.

Surprised nobody's calling Fleur East as a possible winner here.

by judges' houses we were already discussing whether fish or shoes was more likely to go through.

― woof,

Ha! Poor shoes.

Surprised nobody's calling Fleur East as a possible winner here.

― Mark G

Not sure I can see it with the lack of screen time she's been given so far. She's the standout of the overs but that's not really saying much. I looked up her original audition in 2005 with Addictiv Ladies and actually remembered it surprisingly.

I like her but she's inconsistent (from the small amount I've seen) – the judges' houses Bang Bang was great but then she's a bit not-quite at other times, eg I wasn't at all sure last night (but it was an odd song choice imo & that distracted me).

& should say that though tho' the contenders are sub-par I am so happy that Gary fucking barlow has gone.

✓

"will be revealed after the break"
FUCK YOU DERMOT

Louis down to a piss-awful boyband and a group he doesn't understand what to do with.

If so, the group have got a chance.

I'm fairly certain the only reason that other boyband were brought back was to make Ejacula8 seem even better. Simon made it so clear when he was kicking them last night.

Jessie J and Maroon 5 next week. Might have to give that show a miss. Wouldn't it be good to have Ella Henderson on instead as her album is out this week and her second single already slightly underperfomed. You would have thought they'd want to actually show one of their success stories on the show. Olly and One Direction will be on soon but really that's not a lot to show for 10 seasons of the show. Even Leona has buggered off now.

Did anyone else hear Cheryl tell Stephanie "You've got it" before the sing-off?

xp

that makes sense about boyband b – I was surprised they were brought back tbh, they seemed wilful & (apparently) have an established social media power-base, ie entirely too autonomous for the syco machine.

I was hoping that this week's theme of 'I Love The 80s' would mean the 1880s.

Andrea takes the theme to mean 'I Love The Eurovision 80s'.

Ben should have sung 'Don't Dream It's Over' by Crowded House.

The Jesus and Mary Chain released "April Skies" in the 80s

Rickrolled by a flat singing twunt.

this is the worst cover version ever

be more specific, they all could be

500 miles

Slowing down a song is not some kind of world shaking move. It's how they make the backing track for a Sainsbury's advert. Why are there so many close ups on Cheryl's expressionless face?

Well, "That's Entertainment"

Fleur might suffer in the vote, for the usual reasons, though I thought she was great.

Usually hate things like Only The Young on X-Factor, but they're lovely.

The soldier guy I hate on principle, but his Proclaimers thing was actually OK! If you're gonna watch this guff - which I do enthusiastically - you've got to reframe your sense of aesthetics. You can't think in musical terms but rather bow down and consider what would e.g make a good Sainsbury's advert. And this would be a good one!

I liked the fake posh girl tonight most of all. She sang great and Fame is the best song. Theoretically, it's the same song as the Whitney one that Andrea sang, but it's human and hopeful and vulnerable where One Moment In Time is just fascist and inhuman. Big misstep to do that.

In their VT Only The Young seemed like an actual band in the way they approached how they'd arrange their song, something we haven't really seen since JLS?

Andrea's song choice seemed like a mis-step, but it's early in the series and he isn't going anywhere for a while, so there's plenty of time. Chloe is in a more precarious position, her 'Chicago' musical stylings need switching up with something else.
Stereo Dicks: eight boys in a band and all of them are white? How did that slip past? And their song choice was typical Louis / late period Boyzone.
Stevi sang his entire song flat while mugging for the cameras. I can't see how he'll not be in the bottom three, OTOH he's probably got a cloth-eared fanbase already who just eat up this Butlins redcoat / cruise ship nonsense.
Lauren is technically a good singer, but the slower the song the less of her personality comes through. There's only a limited number of times a singer can do this kind of glacial performance on XF before it starts to get boring.

i've had good times on x factor threads past, but i just can't watch this show any more. i get thirty seconds in and it feels like i'm punishing myself. keep fighting the good fight, everybody :'(.

Just started watching. Already they've played Cameo and The Human League in the background. Would be great if either of those bands were covered on the show tonight. Not going to get my hopes up.

Five minutes in and One Direction have already had their weekly bit of promotion.

I shouldn't be surprised that they're making my favourite decade for music seem so boring.

Stereo Kicks might be the worst boy band they've had. The backing track on the chorus was shameless just like all those One Direction performance from 2010 but somehow they even more hateable. Instead of having just one Louis Tomlinson they have four of them. Cheryl's comment about them basically not having a fanbase was amazing.

I don't know how anyone can sing If You Don't Know Me By Now with a straight face when this exists.

http://youtu.be/QlSv818d1Rk

Oh shit, they're pushing Jay James again and it might just be working. His version is currently in the top ten on iTunes.

Have I missed someone, or does Stephanie being voted off make Fleur the only non-white contestant left?

So we lose a potentially interesting singer in Chloe, but the piss-poor Westlife karaoke boys continue.

Chloe might be a potentially interesting singer but she was honking like a goose today. She really fucked it up.

did they put studio kicks together rom auditionees? they couldn't find a singe non-white guy?

Chloe sounded like she wanted out.

It doesn't matter how Chloe sang in the sing off she was fucked the moment she was going up against Stereo Kicks. Simon and the producers are really counting on something happening with these guys. Apparently on Extra Factor Louis was claiming He never wanted eight members in the band and it was all Simon's idea, even going on to blame him for why it's just not working. When asked about their future he said "I'm going to talk to the boys" They will lose at least two of those members by the end of the week.

I wasn't a massive fan of Chloe or Steph but at least they gave the show some variety. Losing the will to keep up with this show now. Like the last couple of years I'm all about wanting to see people I hate kicked out (Stereo Kicks and Jay James mainly) instead of supporting any of the finalists.

If they keep going with the Stereo Kicks thing, it might just be the one thing that kills off the golden goose. No audience likes to be felt like they are being spoon-fed. Even if that's what happens most of the time, they don't want to be told in naked terms "you will buy this".

One of the 'solo' spots from one of the stereo kickers was woeful in the extreme, the guy clearly could not sing a note.

Nala had promise but her voice was too Aluna Francis-y for X-Factor in the end. Feel like it's Platt or Fleur who'll end up on Duke Dumont singles in 18 months anyway.

Chloe was vile, glad to see her out. Can't see anything other than a PUGS victory though.

Have I missed someone, or does Stephanie being voted off make Fleur the only non-white contestant left?

During judges' houses, I was convinced no non-white contestants were going through – I'd have said Stephanie least likely of the girls, and until Fleur killed it & Welsh mother-of-two had a panic attack, I was pretty sure it was Welsh mother-of-two/Haenow/sailor. I was thinking it was some dark-hearted pandering to a smaller, older more ahem 'conservative' audience, but then Fleur and Stephanie went through so

Everything's

Fine.

Really.

Comments about lack of enthusiasm otm - I'm struggling this year. No-one I really like.

Still seeing Andrea in the final, but he might wear thin pretty soon – doesn't help that Mel seems to be an unusually incompetent mentor.

Basically see Stereo Kicks as a weird experiment that still could pull something off, but yeah Mark G maybe otm, it's so blunt & obvious no-one is really engaging. Feels like there's a mob on stage.

The obvious thing to do would be to have a 2nd poll each week on the worst member of stereo kicks, then during the next performance a sniper with a tranquiliser gun picks that member off. Obvs neither they not Louis know which member will be shot.

That is an amazing idea. I think the cardboard cutout guy would be the first one to be taken out. If he's too young to actually feature on Xtra Factor it's an easy choice to get rid of him first. Personally my least favourite member is the quiff guy who is obviously being pushed as the lead singer. His singing face is rather unfortunate. http://www.essexchronicle.co.uk/Stereo-Kicks-star-James-voice-rest-fresh-X-Factor/story-23184088-detail/story.html

James Graham has a cold by Gay Talese

I felt embarrassed for Simon after Stereo Kicks performed so badly on Saturday but he still came out with his usual "I'm excited about this band" "I can see you growing as a band" type comments. Since he put them together he's clearly trying to brainwash the public which I thought might work when they were at the six seat challenge but it's obvious there's no chance of that now. It's kind of like when he tried to push Danyl week after week in 2009 even though it was obvious the public were not going for him (Calling him worse than Hitler etc) Simon carried on each week trying to make him the star he believed he was even though he had Olly and even Joe right there in front of him.

They're not even his act!

Not his act as in not in his category, but if he's one of the people putting the group together surely he gets a stake in them. Just realised it's probably a lot easier to put a boyband together these days (and market them) if you have thousands of solo X factor auditionees to choose from and can put them on telly every week for a couple of months.

i'm amazed that that just occurred to you!

every act is simon's act surely

I watched Xtra Factor last (Because I hate myself obviously) It really isn't looking good for a few of those boys. Louis kept going about how he never wanted eight in the band. When the host asked what he was going to do he basically kept repeating "I'll talk to the boys" When she pushed him and asked him if he had the power to make changes in the group (Obviously he doesn't) He made it sound like he was hoping a few of them might volunteer to leave. I'm kind of excited to see they handle this. They will either carry on and be out in two weeks (Following the same pattern as Kingsland Road from last year) or they will kick out three members which I'm sure will also kill them off, just like The Risk from 2011 when they replaced a member. Bad luck Simon!

Fleur's duet with Labrinth didn't quite mesh. I wonder how much time the contestants get to actually rehearse with the their duet partners?

fuck you GBP

http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120829003851/theonefootinthegrave/images/c/cc/IDNBI.jpg

Fucks sake, have the GBP got cloth ears?

nah i knew it was coming, cloth-eared vanilla ordinary bloke sob-story bullshit bullshit wanker voters

ach well at least Fleur will deservedly crush him tomorrow

If for some reason she doesn't, Simon's money is on her anyway. Ben's heading for Brookstein-esque obscurity and he hasn't even criticised anything Cowell's done.

Also I won't sleep tonight knowing that even now there are people writing slashfic involving Stevi, that rocket, and Chico...

Still have a horrible feeling Ben is going to win this.

Two hours of padding... GO!

xp FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

if ben wins i'm never watching again

This last couple of hours it's just become more and more obvious he was going to win. Good luck trying to make this guy anymore successful than Matt Cardle.

At least Ben isn't an egotistical twit like Cardle. That's one thing in his favour, like Leona, the XF process didn't really change him much as a person.

Voting figures are out. Ben was winning it from week four onwards.

One thing that bugs me more than anything on x-factor is when they sing songs that they have not understood.

I don't know if Fleur fell into that trap, and am sure it made no difference anyway, but when she added the "I want to live with you.. And you and you and you", umm this is not a song about universal love its about living with one person.

Anyway, better Ben gets the "Winners song" that fits him, now Fleur can skip it and do stuff that actually suits her. You know Alexandra Burke never much liked "Hallelujah" and dropped it Snapfish?

The winners song really seemed like it was picked for him and definitely not her. I always think the most misguided winners song was Little Mix getting Cannonball. Such an awful choice for them.

That was disappointing.

Increasingly clear watching Sunday's show what was going to happen - winner's single chosen for Ben, & I think Fleur was a bit hamstrung by having to repeat uptown funk - it was only a week ago, the surprise factor has gone, but what else could she do?

But yeah, the voting figures say a lot - clearly the producers knew what was coming and that Fleur was just *not* going to win - but then she didn't need to. There's not much in 1st and 2nd place if Syco are on your side, and the signs seem good for her. I hope she has a great career. And while I never want to hear Haenow singing again, I hope he enjoys a respectable living in entertainment after this, since he seems a decent person.

Well, Fleur's first performance of it got a big reaction, it seemed a good idea to do it again as a few people might have been prompted to see it for that reason.

The "Winners Song" always seems to be a dead albatross anyway, a song that would have suited Fleur definitely would not have worked for Ben, and they seem to have a stockpile of 'that sort of song' signed to the 'right' publisher.