OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?

i'm reading this right now. dude is opinionated as fuck! fuck you, bitch, jackie and roy rule!!

http://www.amazon.com/Biographical-Guide-Great-Jazz-Singers/dp/0375421491

tapes 'n tapes

they are a real band? I thought markers made them up

A Guide To Great Jazz Singers should be one of those joke books where all the pages are blank.

great record

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=so-nEdceows

I know that Ziggy Stardust was like one of David Bowie’s personas, right? I’m digging the cover of this album, he’s standing next to a bunch of garbage with his guitar and wearing an amazing jumpsuit (which kind of gives him a FUPA on the back cover.) The lighting is dim, it looks like it just rained. I think this record is trying to tell me a story. I’m finding the second half of the name of the album a little cumbersome. “And the spiders from Mars.” Wouldn’t it be better just to call it “The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust?” Doesn’t everyone always just refer to this album as Ziggy Stardust? No one ever mentions the spiders from Mars, but maybe I’ll feel differently after hearing this album, as I’ve never listened to it! The bottom right hand corner of the back cover says “To be played at maximum volume,” which I appreciate. I like little details like that that make you feel like the artist or the band are talking directly to you, the fan. I don’t know if he thought about it with that much detail, but I’d like to picture David Bowie thinking about some kid sitting in their bedroom in 1972, staring at the picture of him kind of looking androgynous and daring, and calling himself Ziggy Stardust and deciding, “I better tell them to play this at maximum volume, because they need that advice.

did Lex write that

ha I thought that was a parody, but no, she's still at it

this person called up a professor at Cornell University and interviewed them at length for a 2,400 article that is entirely about Iggy Azalea not 'shouting out' Charli XCX on the verses of "Fancy"

http://thinkprogress.org/culture/2014/05/29/3443070/why-doesnt-iggy-azalea-give-charli-xcx-a-shout-out-in-fancy/

Halfway through the piece, literally every question is, "Yes, but why didn't she shout out Charlie XCX?"

"if Charli XCX had been in charge of Cornell University and had given you your job, wouldn't you want to tell people that?"

lol

Feel bad for that Cornell prof, like someone with real questions about race, authenticity, and hip-hop could have done at least an interesting interview with him around Iggy Azalea. Instead he got this weird Charlie XCX stan demanding justice.

I love how bad that is, my only complaint is that it isn't long enough. I want to see ivy league professors pushed to breaking point

stay tuned next week, when they sit down and watch every Icona Pop interview on YouTube and count how many times they mention Charli XCX

I want to see more journalists using their powers to troll profs into bringing their exorbitantly-valued expertise to bear on one inane & misconstrued situation over & over again

Haha

Can you imagine how many times that writer's coworkers and friends have heard a rant about this?

"It seems especially weird to me that Charli doesn’t get a shout-out in this song, given that Iggy is a rapper paying homage to all this classic rap."

lmaoooo amazing interview

fp Travis Gosa for not repping "Superlove"

i just keep thinking, if i were charli

why doesn't Iggy Azalea say "we want hen fap" on 'Fancy'?

What's with all those songs Lennon and McCartney wrote for other people where they don't spell out 'B.E.A.T.L.E.S.' in the bridge?

This piece is blowing my mind.

she says "called up" but the really long responses and tone deaf questions and the fact that it doesn't sound like a conversation kind of points to email interview

What is thinkprogress anyway

It's a lefty news site

it's the journalism section of the Center for American Progress, a prominent liberal think bank.

think tank, I mean.

wow, that's fun

So am I fired up over nothing? I just think if I were Charli I’d be so annoyed that this song is huge and her name isn’t huge, too.
I think we’re both dating ourselves here.

prof must be thinking "well i guess if you want to be a public intellectual, you gotta start somewhere" poor guy

i still don't understand why a white woman jacking an African-American artform should be obligated to shout out another white woman

Totally the most puzzling part of the piece, most hilariously captured in this statement by the interviewer:

Well, Charli is Tai. I think Iggy is savvy enough to know, what with all the appropriation controversy she’s already stirred, that it would be a very bad idea to cast Charli as Dionne.

Headline writers at ThinkProgress, realizing comic inanity of article, give it the headline "‘I’m The Realest’: The Authenticity Of Rap’s Newest Superstar, Iggy Azalea" to reflect the article they were hoping would get written.

I still don't understand why Iggy shouting Charli out is going to help her get famous more than a "Featuring Charli XCX" credit is

I don't know, it's probably somehow related to the imagined rules of shout-out etiquette that this writer believes have been universally applied throughout the world of hip-hop for the last 35 years.

I want to give a shoutout to FunkMaster Flex and all the DJs across the world
I want to give a shoutout to my nigga Lupe, I want to give a shoutout to my nigga Suge Knight, to my nigga Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg
I want to give a shoutout to um,um, what's them niggas, Outkast
I want to give a shoutout to them crazy niggas in parts of the world that I never been too
I want to give a shoutout to the Eskimos, I want to give a shoutout to the submarines
I want to give a shoutout to the Army, Air Force, Navy, Marines
Know what I'm saying? Y'all playing my music in the submarines and the boats; play that shit know what I'm saying?It's called travelling music, bustin' ya ass style. Yo Big Baby Jesus; It's One Love.
I give a shout out to all the women, I give a shout out to all the babies, all the munchkins, all across the world playa. I want to give a shoutout to all the school teachers. I give a shout out to um,um, Charli XCX

wait until she finds out big sean is uncredited on "problem"

This thing is incredible.

i want lots of articles like this. would read them all day.

Why doesn't Geddy Lee shout out Aimee Man on "Time Stand Still"?

nobody wants to hear Geddy Lee shout iirc

He shouts like an ordinary guy

fact checking cuz to thread

wrt to the blog rock article, via ned http://www.cantstopthebleeding.com/guest-editorial-why-must-grantland-puke-all-over-my-rich-cultural-heritage

http://www.noiseporn.com/2014/05/music-piracy-remain-illegal/

Let me be clear: this IS theft. I’ve consulted with several attorneys about it and they concur.

I realize Clap Your Hands Say Yeah only sold a few tens of thousands of records, but every single person who bought one of those records went on to work in the tech industry.

Excellent

Surely there are more important things to worry about in a world rife with war, natural disasters and noise pollution compliments of Avril Lavigne

This zing makes me think he's been working on this article for about ten years now, revising and revising, killing his darlings