THE WORST NME COVER OF ALL TIME

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Hmmm, I just can't profess a *complete* hatred of the Strokes, as much as I want to. It's a kickback to my indie-disco days.

― person#0 (person#0), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:49 (twenty years ago) link

Eh, this is nothing about Strokes hatred, this is just about him looking silly. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:57 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, but to admit he's always looked silly would to be to hate on him unethically (!)

― person#0 (person#0), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 15:00 (twenty years ago) link

No, it was the one for Glastonbury one year with Carter USM on the cover. They looked like indie hoboes and were even more vomtastic than usual.

― Larcole (Nicole), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 15:04 (twenty years ago) link

Can someone dig out the mid-70s cover where they report on the Japanese rock scene with the headline "CAN YELLOW MEN SING THE WHITES?" and an entertaining 'slitty eyes' cover pic? I'm going home now.

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 15:48 (twenty years ago) link

six months pass...

a new candidate:
http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/

Jet

useless retro rock band from OZ - digusting hippies !

Why is the NME so backwards ?

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 12:31 (twenty years ago) link

"The Lairiest band in the world"? huh? like thats something to celebrate again?

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 12:43 (twenty years ago) link

or ever was!?!

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 12:44 (twenty years ago) link

my god, they are ugly.

― hmmm, Wednesday, 3 March 2004 13:28 (twenty years ago) link

i wish Campag Velocet would be on magazine covers again...

i vote for the Tony Blair one, something about his face just annoys but it's the statement intended really, and he's holding a guitar iirc

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 13:31 (twenty years ago) link

If any of you have a spare few minutes on lunch have a read of Kerrang's interview with that cunt from The Vines. It's an absolute hoot

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 13:54 (twenty years ago) link

Ken Livingstone on the decks, with a pair of big headphones on and the words KEN YOU KICK IT? emblazoned across the front page surely wins this hands down?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 14:14 (twenty years ago) link

what's "lairy"?

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 15:43 (twenty years ago) link

Lairy- drunkenly threatening.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 15:55 (twenty years ago) link

cheers

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 16:04 (twenty years ago) link

Menswear, anyone?

― JJ, Wednesday, 3 March 2004 17:42 (twenty years ago) link

I was way pissed off that I missed that Godspeed You Black Emperor cover (was in Australia for a couple fo weeks either side of it).

So, personally it would be that one.

But Red KeNME is my proper vote.

― Jim Robinson (Original Miscreant), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 17:44 (twenty years ago) link

And check out that Vines article. Brilliant, absolutely brilliant.

― Jim Robinson (Original Miscreant), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 17:56 (twenty years ago) link

I think that Livingstone cover was when Ben Knowles was editor. He was appointed by Livingstone as one of London's cultural advisors. Conicidence?

― Canada Briggs (Canada Briggs), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 17:57 (twenty years ago) link

No.

― Jim Robinson (Original Miscreant), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 18:08 (twenty years ago) link

But yes to 'conincidence'.

― Jim Robinson (Original Miscreant), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 20:18 (twenty years ago) link

Can someone post a link to the nutty Vines article? My googling is not working.

― Ben Boyer (Ben Boyer), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 20:27 (twenty years ago) link

Their Nu Metal campaign around 2001 was quite pathetic.

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 22:58 (twenty years ago) link

three months pass...

New worst NME front cover:
http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/

useless garage rock band Razorlight naked with St George's cross Flag.

I thought The Ordinary Boys would be the biggest brit trad rock duffers of 2004, they now have competition in the complete useless c-unts stakes, step forward Razorlight.

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:43 (nineteen years ago) link

I thought it said Emo2004 rocks, but remembered that silly "football" game you kill each other over.

― Chris Ott (Chris Ott), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:46 (nineteen years ago) link

hard nosed music fan who has seen everything in last few years saw this lot last night in bristol fully expecting to rename them razorshite by the end of the evening. anyway ..she said they were ace and so still refers to them as razorlite.
still, seriously cr*p cover .. and what with the latest Q cover .. theres deffo sommat in the water ..

― mark e (mark e), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:47 (nineteen years ago) link

The best one was Pat Nevin

― coco, Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:48 (nineteen years ago) link

as for NME.com - what a useless news service, Libertines daily updates zzzzzzzzzzzz

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:50 (nineteen years ago) link

The worst was 'Summer 2001 White Riot What are you fucking doing? etc -- ed.'

― Enrique (Enrique), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:52 (nineteen years ago) link

yep, it definitely needed a response from the Mekons

― robin carmody (robin carmody), Thursday, 10 June 2004 22:24 (nineteen years ago) link

"Summer 2001 Riot: racism is bad, mmm'kay?" was a particular lowpoint, but how about the post Almost Famous "NME journalists talk about themselves" cover?

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 10 June 2004 22:33 (nineteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

the worst ever:

http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/img/cover_030704_L.jpg

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Tuesday, 29 June 2004 15:39 (nineteen years ago) link

i see they have appropriated a Smash Hits-ism from 20 years ago.

the amusing thing is that NME covers never had that sort of design EVEN WHEN THAT SORT OF DESIGN WAS FASHIONABLE THE FIRST TIME; their covers then were very plain-looking, serious affairs. and is that a reference to "the new Darkness"? whoever can they mean ...

― robin carmody (robin carmody), Tuesday, 29 June 2004 17:29 (nineteen years ago) link

two months pass...

new worst ever cover

http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/img/cover_140904_L.jpg

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 14:51 (nineteen years ago) link

oh my god!! it really is turning into q. that's ridiculous.

― piscesboy, Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Is that today's? Good fuck. (PS. What score have they given Embrace?)

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:05 (nineteen years ago) link

yes, it's this week's NME:
http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:08 (nineteen years ago) link

That looks like something you'd buy from The Works.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:10 (nineteen years ago) link

That really is bad. Who the hell doing their graphic design, Bazooka Joe?

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:21 (nineteen years ago) link

I knew DJ Martian would revive this thread, he's the ILX equivalent of 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells'.

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Tuesday, 14 September 2004 15:56 (nineteen years ago) link

Not only is this the worst front cover, it's the worst NME issue ever. Absolute gormless garbage.

If a publisher launched a new weekly music magazine - they would wipe the floor with competition so weak as the NME.

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Wednesday, 15 September 2004 12:51 (nineteen years ago) link

no they'd sink after just two months. NME has it's name to fall back on.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 15 September 2004 12:54 (nineteen years ago) link

i dunno, depends on the demographic. none of us old cunts are buying it: how much does 'nme' really mean to Ver Kidz in WH Smith?

― HKM, Wednesday, 15 September 2004 12:58 (nineteen years ago) link

(PS. What score have they given Embrace?)

One out of 10 *cackle, wheeze*

― DJ Mencap0))), Wednesday, 15 September 2004 13:03 (nineteen years ago) link

If a publisher launched a new weekly music magazine - they would wipe the floor with competition so weak as the NME.

Do you have this fucking sentence on your desktop so you can c+p it in every time a thread about the NME pops up?

― DJ Mencap0))), Wednesday, 15 September 2004 13:05 (nineteen years ago) link

at least they could have used a different number. even 1002 would be more interesting. but i suppose that upsets symetry.

― frankE (frankE), Wednesday, 15 September 2004 13:27 (nineteen years ago) link

one month passes...

I think this week's could be a winner. Features a terrible photo of Kings Of Leon with the horrible strapline of 'YOU BIGGER, BETTER NME STARTS INSIDE!', which is true, because it definitely doesn't start on the cover.

Also, the new 'Tracks!' section doesn't work. Even though it quite easily could, as a million blogs have proven. They haven't sorted them properly - you can't tell straightaway what's a proper single, what's a download or what's simply getting radio play. It seems to completely ignore 'illegal' downloads in favour of iTunes or Napster stuff, unsurprisingly.

― James Mitchell (James Mitchell), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 00:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Ugh.

http://microsites.nme.com/thisweek/img/cover_191004_L.jpg

They've sort of rejigged the insides as well. As in taken what they'd obviously spent months on for their last redesign, and changed some of it about a bit. Like emboldening the font they'd use for headlines for the 'Go Postal' page (ie 'Angst') and putting a border around it. Except now the letters page is called 'The Letters Page'.

I count at least four plugs (including one full page) for 'SUBSCRIBE NOW! GET EIGHT ISSUES FREE!'.

This has to be the last stage before it gets to the 'shrink it down to A4 size and make it glossy like Smash Hits' point that killed Melody Maker. Now that the whole Strokes/White Stripes fuss has died off, it's got to be losing sales again, right?

― James Mitchell (James Mitchell), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 00:35 (nineteen years ago) link

SUBSCRIBE NOW! GET EIGHT ISSUES FREE!

...except we'll fold soon so you wont.

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 01:02 (nineteen years ago) link

if america ever decides it gives a shit about the kings of leon i am going to be sooooo mad. they won't though. they won't.

― manthony m1cc1o (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 01:11 (nineteen years ago) link

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Temporarily locking this one as the conversation is also going on here: Has The NME Got Good?

― Matt DC, Wednesday, 7 March 2018 13:44 (six years ago) link

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