Lindsay Lohan: "Hot, Ready, and Legal!"

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I wish Lindsay would quit it with the spray tan.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:37 (9 years ago) Permalink

What exactly is she known for in the first place?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:37 (9 years ago) Permalink

She'd be such a moon goddess if she were pale and freckly instead of orange and freckly. Oh and the frosty pink lips gotta go, too. And the eyeliner.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:38 (9 years ago) Permalink

Ned: title of the thread, minus "legal."

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:38 (9 years ago) Permalink

How quaint.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (9 years ago) Permalink

She looks like a cat that's just sat on a buttplug. Doesn't do anything for me.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (9 years ago) Permalink

Ned how old do you sound with these comments? (Alternate: Ned how long were you in Venezuela?)

Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (9 years ago) Permalink

It does something for the cat, Adam.

Ned how old do you sound with these comments?

I always talk like this! The only think I know about Ms. Lohan was some poster for a movie earlier this year, which failed to convince me as to why she was already known.

I was there for a week and a half.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:40 (9 years ago) Permalink

She looks like the photographer has just said to her, in an Austin Powers voice, "oooooh Lindsay, you're ever so NAUGHTY!".

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:41 (9 years ago) Permalink

think = thing, etc.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:41 (9 years ago) Permalink

Mandee OTM about the pale-&-freckly. For sure.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:42 (9 years ago) Permalink

MEN CAN'T SEE MAKEUP.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:42 (9 years ago) Permalink

She was very funny in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls, FWIW.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:43 (9 years ago) Permalink

They just think that all women's lips are like that.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:43 (9 years ago) Permalink

I must admit, I thought she was a cute kid when I caught The Parent Trap on the ABC/Disney Family Movie or whatever a few years ago. But she was 12 then.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:44 (9 years ago) Permalink

So she's some sort of Disney-clone-farm troll, I assume.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:45 (9 years ago) Permalink

too old now? xp

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:45 (9 years ago) Permalink

Kirsetn Dunst in Interview With The Vampire to thread.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:46 (9 years ago) Permalink

the tan, the makeup, the clothes - no, no, no. it makes me want to kill myself! do you know what i could do if i had that kind of $ at my disposal? i'd be unstoppable! and i'd know enough to pay for a decent plastic surgeon! jesus wept!

lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:46 (9 years ago) Permalink

I wish they'd cut the double entendres and enuendo and just make the headline "HEY SICK OLD MAN, YOU WANT TO FUCK HER DON'T? DONT YOU?"

David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (9 years ago) Permalink

I was a child actor, and nobody celebrated my own passing over the jailbait threshold. What gives?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (9 years ago) Permalink

Well, i was the innkeeper in a nativity play.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (9 years ago) Permalink

Did you wear a blanket around your head like Linus?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (9 years ago) Permalink

I like how Rolling Stone now has covers that Maxim and FHM would deem too obvious.

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (9 years ago) Permalink

"Sorry. no room, Mary and joseph"

Cue rapturous applause.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (9 years ago) Permalink

Does this lust for untouchable teenage Hollywood jailbait - the kind that causes me to claw at my eyes during sleep, write "creative" letters to the police and local newspapers, use Photoshop for purposes surely at odds with those for which it was conceived, and spend hours in front of the mirror repeating various mantras to myself - dissipate with age, I wonder? Or are we subject to a lifetime of this torture?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:54 (9 years ago) Permalink

ILE rips on celebrities too much. This is my counterpost. I like Lohan quite a bit. She's decent on the acting front, can be awfully funny, and just generally has a likeability that a lot of competing teen-girl-stars don't, quite so much. She's got a style that's generally hers, or anyway doesn't seem all styled-and-crafted to blankness. Plus she's awfully cute, in a laid-back and smart-seeming kind of way. She's now surprisingly curvy, and not just in a breasty way, which is possibly somehow refreshing for a teen-girl-star. Equally refreshing is that she's not incredibly chipper and eager-to-please like most people in her position wind up being. You start imagining that if you spent time with her she'd pick on you and make lots of sly dirty jokes, as opposed to like Hilary Duff, who would be all chipper and talky and energetic. You can imagine Lohan hanging out and getting stoned and eating cookies, in a fun, healthy way, which is hard to imagine with say Duff, and hard to imagine with say the Olsen Twins except as some sort of sordid spiraling-away "It's Drugs!" thing. Plus I will totally admit it: in Mean Girls, during the Christmas dance bit, Lohan and her large thighs look super-nice. I don't mean that in a dirty or obsessed way, just that she looked nice and I was happy for her.

So there.

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:55 (9 years ago) Permalink

Also it's important to note that I like her hair and her freckles, which I agree should not always be oranged-out.

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:57 (9 years ago) Permalink

I'm not dissing her, Nabisco! I do really, really hate the spray tan, though.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:58 (9 years ago) Permalink

yay nabisco!

she is like a safe Carmen Electra. Now I realize that making Carmen Electra safe takes away most of the fun, but, you know. I'm not complaining.

kyle (akmonday), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:59 (9 years ago) Permalink

i think hillary duff is brilliant. still haven't seen mean girls, so i'll withhold my opinion on which of them should have 'won' (there was/is beef btw HD & LL, right?) my point was, RS LIES.

g--ff (gcannon), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:59 (9 years ago) Permalink

I think this isn't so much anti-Lindsay as it is anti-"Rolling Stone again summing up a young female celeb by the fact that they can now be legally fucked"

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:00 (9 years ago) Permalink

"and boy are they hot for it!"

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:00 (9 years ago) Permalink

Oh come on. Like Lindsay Lohan is going to read this thread, wipe away a tear, and sniffle about how we pick on her too much?

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:02 (9 years ago) Permalink

I think the girl should just seriously rethink her look because if I were as hot as her I'd do SO MUCH BETTER.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:03 (9 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, I like that she's "ready." Do they ask her?

"Lindsay, do you think you're ready to have sex?"
"Yes, I am totally gagging for it."
"Can we quote you on that?"
"Yes, please send headshots and resumes to 18339 Alameda Avenue..."

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:03 (9 years ago) Permalink

her voice is a bit "40 year old divorced smoker"

cutty (mcutt), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:04 (9 years ago) Permalink

I think my point w/r/t The Parent Trap was that I liked her pale-and-freckly stage, and even though I've still found her very charming as an actress in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls, I could do without the sleazy looks that have accompanied her rise to adulthood.

Virgin/whore complex to thread.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:04 (9 years ago) Permalink

yeah her voice is totally classic! she must have started smoking at age 6.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:05 (9 years ago) Permalink

This is all very bemusing.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:06 (9 years ago) Permalink

i'd like to C on her T's

cutty (mcutt), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:06 (9 years ago) Permalink

Is this where we start talking about Bring It On Again?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:07 (9 years ago) Permalink

cutty, dude, UNCALLED FOR.

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:07 (9 years ago) Permalink

i don't think that she comes across as particularly intelligent, and i think that her style is a pretty generic, slightly toned down version of tacky hilton/richie/reid chic. perhaps the dirty joke thing comes from the fact that she seems like she'd be filthy if you got her in the sack. the one thing i'll give her is that she successfully oozes the dirty sex vibe like only christina aguilera can. better, actually... xtina has always seemed a bit forced to me, like she'd be all "come on do it to me, baby" but then scream bloody murder if you tried anal.

lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:07 (9 years ago) Permalink

The fact that some stylist fucked her up for some RS cover isn't in any way indicative of her style.

roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:07 (9 years ago) Permalink

I agree with you, J. She was paler and frecklier toward the beginning of Mean Girls, no? There should have been a short-skirt dance sequence earlier on. Also: she was really likeable on SNL, too.

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:07 (9 years ago) Permalink

there should have been more slo motion and short skirt dancing in general, really.

TheRealJMod (TheRealJMod), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:08 (9 years ago) Permalink

what did i say wrong? ;)

cutty (mcutt), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:09 (9 years ago) Permalink

Do people really say stuff like "come on do it to me, baby"?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:09 (9 years ago) Permalink

treesh perez hilton wishes he was a very new development

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Saturday, 12 April 2014 00:42 (3 months ago) Permalink


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