Unemployed Watercooler Fridge Buzz Commiseration, Alienation and Mental Anti-Stagnation Society (DNRIYHM)

a bloke is a bloke is a bloke

And while I am complaining, I would also like to air my irritation with the "No-Yes".

This is that horrible phenomenon whereby people manage to turn down something, without ever using the word "no" and in fact, while maintaining a cheerful air that they plan on doing something they never actually intend to do. I don't know what people get out of this. The idea that they are letting you down easy? The idea that they are not-negative, and positive, and Do Things, while all the time keeping you in this kind of suspense whereby you never actually get a "no" so that you can move on and make other plans, you just exist in this quasi-space of slowly decaying hope.

If I suggest to you, that I do A Thing for you, and you don't want to do the Thing, just say "thanks, but no thank you". Do not display enthusiasm and say "yes, let's do the thing, let me have a think and get back to you" and then... slowly ghost and then not get back to me. This is the second time this has happened in a month, with different people in different situations, and in this case, I should probably send another, more firm suggestion of instead of "I would like to do A Thing for you" I should say "I would like to do Thing X for you, I expect it will take this long" but good god I am sick of chasing people to no avail.

Also, Tumblr is failing in its appointed task of providing me with more pictures of Kessler being adorable this morning, and this is irritating.

This is a Kessler:

http://31.media.tumblr.com/ecdd82beeaf46415e7c91be908f50d0c/tumblr_n40ksdiONA1rjw8sqo1_1280.jpg

...and another email from someone wanting to use my drawings in a local publication, with no mention of payment, but lots of mention of "exposure" and "promotion" and I am trying to get up the nerve to just write back and say "My rates for print publication are £30 for an original image, and £50 for a colour image" (which is probably actually incredibly low, because I've no idea what the market rates are, because everybody just expects you to work for free) and take it from there.

Because quite frankly, I've already had, this year, two rounds of people using my artwork for free because "it's great exposure" and quite frankly, at this point, I don't want more exposure. I want cold hard cash.

(Yes, ironic, considering that I was willing to work for the "no-yes" people for free but I'm running out of patience, not to mention cash.)

Went to Epping Forest yesterday, which was lovely (in the mist and the rain) but at the same time: disappointed by total lack of bluebells. Well, maybe one tiny small patch of bluebells the size of a bathtub, hiding under a bush.

Why no bluebells? Biggin Wood, locally, is a mass of bluebells!

Is this because London is always 5 degrees warmer than the surrounding countryside, so London bluebells are earlier than Essex? Or, because Epping Forest is mostly beech wood, there is so little ground cover, so no bluebells? (Though bluebells usually come out before the full leaf canopy has sprung in spring, so surely this wouldn't matter?)

Walk: lovely, but still somewhat dismayed by lack of bluebells. Where can I go (within reach of London) that has good bluebells?

if you think about something very sad and then look in the mirror you might see a blue Bell.

Only if I hold my breath.

that's a more efficient and less gloomy method than mine.

Hampstead Heath or Highgate Woods for bluebells? Might also find the last of the season's wild garlic into the bargain.

Hampstead Heath in abundance, and there's an impressive display in a tiny park/reclaimed pavement beside the Royal Free along from Belsize Park tube

I really wanted to go somewhere more exotic than Hampstead. Not that Essex is exotic but... well, ~not London~.

Wikipedia says that "The thicker the summer canopy, the more the competitive ground-cover is suppressed, encouraging a dense carpet of bluebells, whose leaves mature and die down by early summer."

One place that springs to mind is Coneybank Wood, nr. Great Missenden. There's a footpath running through the wood (it's a pleasant walk from Great Missenden to Wendover) and I remember the woods being awash with bluebells in early May 2009.

http://www.bing.com/maps/?v=2&cp=51.711544~-0.721207&lvl=15&sty=s&eo=0&q=london&form=LMLTCC

https://www.flickr.com/search/?q=%22Coneybank%20Wood%22

https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2444/3625834968_c232c89e2b_z.jpg

Early May? maybe I am simply too early.

I shall have to investigate woods and walks and train times and things.

I am trying to get up the nerve to just write back and say "My rates for print publication are £30 for an original image, and £50 for a colour image" (which is probably actually incredibly low, because I've no idea what the market rates are, because everybody just expects you to work for free) and take it from there.

do this! exposure is worthless!! make the buggers pay! [and your rates are very reasonable]

maybe I am simply too early.

I shouldn't think so, it's nearly May already. They'll be out now.

Maybe I just picked a bad forest! Except there were actual posters up, on the carpark billboard of "Epping Bluebells" so there surely must be bluebells in Epping forest; just not the bit I was in. I shall try another woods.

Stevie, I did do. They declined to pay, claiming they were new and just getting started and apparently the whole point of the magazine is... advertising for local businesses? I declined to do them any illustrations.

Weirdly, I got another local "community" magazine, also mainly advertising for local businesses, and it had this weird rant in the back of it, about how they were supposed to be a charity, and the printing press they run is to train and employ disabled people and apparently some people they got in to organise advertisers for them "realised how lucrative this was" and ran off with their advertisers to start their own magazine, and this is "stealing from a charity, which is just not done!" and it was all very outraged and weird and ~local politics~ and it makes me wonder if they were talking about the people that approached me? Whatever it is, it's very strange, and all quite ~local~ and kind of amusing and kind of sad in "two bald men arguing over a comb" territory.

"two bald men arguing over a comb"

No sexist comments please

One of the worst examples of casual gender based derogatory stereotyping I've seen for a while on ilx

Seriously, go fuck yourself. I'm not going to bother with a lazy zing, just get the fuck off this thread with that bullshit. You're not funny and you're not clever, you're just an asshole. This is not the place for you.

I am worried about going bald

Just cop to unconscious sexism - you'll feel better in the long run.

But I am buggering off, though.

Branwell, I am pretty sure Trent Park has bluebells in abundance, if you fancy a trip to the northern end of the Piccadilly Line.

Just got back from Warsaw, visiting the in-laws. They live in Wilanów - fascinating place. It has a palace, which is kind of the Polish equivalent of Versailles.

They also have this at the end of their street - The Temple of Divine Providence:

http://warsawtomorrow.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Temple-of-divine-providence-Warsaw-Front-Wilanow-9.jpg

And having considered for a few hours, I'm back to say:

BB - it's irritating that when you're called out on something that you just use the 'this is such a lazy zing, I'm not even going to answer this. Fuck you, seriously' response e.g. exhibit a

I don't know why men put up with overwork culture.

This is really ignorant and unthinking. The long hours culture is a massive problem that affects both men and women. You may have seen reference today to Nick Clegg's speech at the launch of the Cityfathers - a group established to try to effect cultural change in this area. It's a complicated area where men suffer as do women. I assume you'd be outraged if I said, 'I don't know why women put up with x, y z [e.g. part-time jobs, lower pay etc}]

exhibit b

kind of amusing and kind of sad in "two bald men arguing over a comb" territory is into belittling men territory, even if unconsciously.

it's a common saying and it is most definitely not 'One of the worst examples of casual gender based derogatory stereotyping I've seen for a while on ilx' and you know it.

or is it a US/UK thing like "scheme"

It's a quote by Borges abt the Falklands War

Why don't you lecture me some more about this ~reverse sexism~, and how appalling this commonly used phrase is in conjunction with the terrible systematic gender-based oppression that men and their rights face, and then we can get into reverse racism, and how terrible white people have it in the UK, and how terribly discriminated against heterosexual people are in this culture.

Or else, you can leave a conversation you have been asked to leave, or maybe just go and fuck yourself you tedious little excuse for a human being.

No, seriously. You have all of ILX to play on, and you decide you're going to come on this thread, and have this discussion here. Spare me.

Know what this thread needs?

Kessler, that's what it needs.

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyx6ptPVWj1qzk5i5o1_1280.jpg

Plenty of sayings have gone past their use-by date.

Worth me clarifying that what i was getting was 'worst examples of casual gender based derogatory stereotyping' ..it's the casual unthinkingness of it....but let's not quarrel like two fishwives.

Kessler making purple sex faces.

https://31.media.tumblr.com/31c30717b9c7412f11c2f40643bb097f/tumblr_n40cfmqX9H1qmmuqeo1_500.jpg

Kessler looking like a demented creature from the pits of hell...

https://24.media.tumblr.com/7f55b2526f574b8b4ff95c58e17b746f/tumblr_n4gc8bh2W61qgze9ho2_500.png

Haha, yes, this facial expression just about sums it up, Danny boy.

https://31.media.tumblr.com/8ca84c3c7b124c63d72ef56ba368f485/tumblr_n3n8iaPLyj1qfh80oo4_r4_250.gif

This is toxicity in its purest form: someone asks you about something questionable that you said, and your response is to cast aspersions at THAT person and their motives, and proceed to make the entire thing ALL ABOUT YOU and how wounded you are by these terrible allegations that something you said might have been ableist, rather than just saying "OK, yeah, sorry I could see how that could read badly, I'll try to be more careful."

― "righteous indignation shit" (Branwell Bell), Friday, February 7, 2014 9:29 AM (2 months ago)

It's raining Kesslers, hallelujah, it's raining Kesslers...

https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2814/12394739164_ff8e34fece_o.png

giving the pathetic trolling exactly the attention it deserves, BB your beau reminds me of one of DuJour and googling it I see I'm not the only one!

DUJOUR MEANS POST-PUNK!

(I like it)

There's also been EXTREMELY good news in the Cornish community tonight.

"At Midnight, Kernow Becomes an Offically Recognised National Minority of UK on par with Wales, Scotland and Ireland"

(x-post)

Yeah:

maybe just go and fuck yourself you tedious little excuse for a human being

really deserves to be applauded.

To celebrate, let's have some Du Jour dance moves from Kessler...

https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5301/5640442078_368f6f86c0_b.jpg

A cowlicked dude in need of a comb...

https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3283/2832362756_b8bf50907d_b.jpg

Hey BB I had a rich hairline like that Kessler when I was 26, since the male pattern baldness sequence began it far less impressive. Huh? how come people don't smile at me anymore? Oh yeah it is because I am oppressed obv !

Be more Kessler: grow sideburns!

I blame Brandon for this. If he hadn't joined sodding Interpol and made me go see them my delicate sensibilities would never have been exposed to the dangerously masculine quiff of Kessler and my mind would remain unbesmirched. Damn you, Curtis! *shakes fist*

His bro wrote for Select in the 90's, didn't google that just have a spergerish memory for useless information. Ted Kessler.

~Ironically~ said bro writes about ~men's issues~ for the Torygraph now!

(I didn't google that either; little Kessler tweeted one. It was actually a rlly lovely piece, to be fair)

((It's weird that I was aware of big Kessler for years because of Select, Q, etc. without connecting that they were related. But then again, I never had any reason to pay attention to anyone in Interpol unti big Curtis joined.))

(((not going to speculate on my tendency to fancy hott little brothers)))

Kernow Bys Vyken!

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/cornish-people-formally-declared-a-national-minority-along-with-scots-welsh-and-irish-9278725.html

xps
I did wonder if they were related! (Otherwise people our age and older think of *Secret Army and the spin off when Kessler is mentioned)

*UK late 70s WW2 Belgian resistance drama that Allo Allo was a pisstake if (the colonel was in both funnily enough)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secret_Army_%28TV_series%29

I saw it when it was shown on UK Gold some years ago and couldn't believe my eyes when Cliff Claven from Cheers turned up in it.

anyway sorry for interrupting about tv you probably weren't aware of BB.

WAHT.

By the end of this series Kessler and Brandt are closing in on Curtis, as their investigation into a murder in France has led them to the name 'Monsieur Maurice', which is Curtis's pseudonym. Brandt and Kessler pay their first visit to the Candide to locate him. Kessler's interest in Curtis poses a significant threat to Lifeline, and so it is agreed that Curtis will return to England. However Kessler begins a troop encirclement of Brussels in order to trap him. Curtis manages to escape to Switzerland by posing as bus driver for a local Hitler Youth group that is travelling out of the city on a day trip.

Of course I am now imagining various members of Interpol chasing each other around Switzerland while dressed as bus drivers for Hitler Youth groups.

No, wait, that's mine own private re-write of the programme, called Secret Machines Army.

No, seriously. You have all of ILX to play on, and you decide you're going to come on this thread, and have this discussion here. Spare me.

― Branwell Bell, Wednesday, April 23, 2014 11:17 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Fucksake, how many threads are 'yours' now? Its fucking tedious.

Do you fancy daniel kessler? thats fuckin fascinating. post pictures of him in every thread going and then cry when people post in one of 'your' threads.