OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?

I propose an entryist campaign of ILXors applying to write for rockfreaks.net, then we can subvert the system from within

wait does it really say "good great music" on the site itself? if so, genius

ah it's Danish. I suppose some unfamiliarity with English can be forgiven. But still DEATH TO THE ROCKISTS

great music varies- some of it is good

From a college newspaper review that's not worth vilifying by linking, but I love this faint praise:

If you are a fan of staid, indie melodies and retro-modern beats, then Angel Olsen's new album "Burn Your Fire for No Witness" is probably for you. Although by no means warm or exciting, Olsen's newest compilation is a testament to the fact that heartbreak can help create the most interesting music.

it says "realized that good great music exists in each and every genre"

xp bit of a Marilyn Hagerty vibe to that one

that sentence really hedges its bets

The Angel Olsen one is amazing. Had to google for the whole review. I like this sentence: "That being said, Olsen's music is not the type you dance along with in the car."

some days i feel like the only person in the world who isn't on the retro-modern beats bandwagon

http://s29.postimg.org/6m3s3v093/image.png

just imagining someone mixing meat loaf and goth in a pot

http://s14.postimg.org/k4vs1pa8x/av2.png

yes, that's typically how it happens

avclub routinely has some of the worst writing around.

Lmao that headline

with one weird song

Not the worst piece of music writing ever, but an example of how writers find all that counting and math stuff very difficult at times.

You can now watch a clip of them performing “Losing My Edge” below and check out the 38-song tracklist.

The Long Goodbye:
01 “Dance Yrself Clean”
02 “Drunk Girls”
03 “I Can Change”
04 “Time to Get Away”
05 “Get Innocuous!”
06 “Daft Punk Is Playing at My House”
07 “Too Much Love”
08 “All My Friends”
09 “Tired / Heart of the Sunrise”
20 “45:33 Intro”
21 “You Can’t Hide (Shame On You)”
22 “Sound of Silver”
23 “Out In Space”
24 “Ships Talking”
25 “Freak Out / Starry Eyes”
26 “Us v Them”
27 “North American Scum”
28 “Bye Bye Bayou”
29 “You Wanted a Hit”
30 “Tribulations”
31 “Movement”
32 “Yeah”
33 “Someone Great”
34 “Losing My Edge”
35 “Home”
36 “All I Want”
37 “Jump Into the Fire”
38 “New York, I Love You But You’re Bringing Me Down”

http://www.stereogum.com/1667153/lcd-soundsystem-announce-live-album-of-final-concert/news/

i came across this allmusic review earlier today:

Music for Films, Vol. 3, is a set of mismatched pieces by Brian Peter George St. John le Baptiste de la Salle Eno (aka Eno). They are from his voluminous works for cinema, installations, shorts, and other related media. The disc contains 15 short pieces (only one is over five minutes). In that regard, there is a distinct similarity to his new wave pop music from the '70s. This CD is, however, all instrumental, largely electronic, and distinctly Eno. Despite their dissimilar origins, these tracks have definite cohesion. Eno injects avant-garde timbres and metallic textures into each composition. The flow is smooth, the atmospheres are vast, and the soundscapes are vivid. This is a very cool montage of Eno's work.

http://louderthanwar.com/in-defence-of-frank-turner/

a URL which delivers and then some

crikey... that's TERRIBLE.

Author Bio
ian-critchley
"I hate writing about myself as a writer so instead I got UK singer/songwriter Mike Morris writer / editor to do me justice: [Ian is] infectious and full of emotion, much like a high tempered fever going on a verbal rampage which will only end in tears and laughter. Never one to step shyly into a subject that no other man would touch with an infected ten foot pole! Fearless and a little brash at times but always honest and a damn good read!"

Yay?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/1/18/Mike_Morris_TV-am_Headshot.jpg/220px-Mike_Morris_TV-am_Headshot.jpg ??

not really music writing tbf to the lad

One reader of John Robb’s ‘An Open Letter To Frank Turner’ (view here) that was posted on this website commented

lol

Frank really has more in common with Ghandi then he does with someone like Thatcher, so go fuck yourself.

"Go fuck yourself" - Ghandi

I don't know if that's the same guy as Gandhi though.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_I5jWivtqr-k/TNGsuCNmS7I/AAAAAAAAAM4/5N1kka2Vjgw/s400/Makeup+of+garbage+graph.png

If we place the article somewhere on this graph it would most likely be in the same spot as glass on the Y axis and roughly about the same distance along on the X, though in the opposite direction.

I need to say again, this is one of the most terrible pieces of writing of any kind that I have ever read. It is truly the defence that the execrable Turner deserves.

was gonna bump Frank's v own thread for this on the grounds that it indeed isn't really music writing... but something drew me towards this one instead

"wank-bond-villain-looking villain, Adolf Hitler"

new display name btw

it's certainly punk grammar

BUY WANK BONDS

Man, if you could buy bonds in wank... imagine the shorts trading on the those.

sad. every clueless girlfriend/cool record dude cliche on one page. what if pomplamooose wrote record revieews

http://alltherecords.tumblr.com/

basically just raises my feminist hackles. yes i have feminist hackles.

But she's not a music writer? Does that really belong here? It just looks like she's having a bit of fun.

This project was my idea, inspired by maybe one too many glasses of wine last weekend, when I was in charge of changing the music. “I can’t believe there are so many records here that I have never listened to. I should try to listen to all of them. And then write about it.” So here we are.

it's in public. it's music writing. a bit of fun is fair game. i don't care if someone is an amateur. i was an amateur for years.

BE COOL ITS JUST A BIT OF FUN

it's in public. it's music writing.

if this is the criteria, then I nominate all Youtube comments

honestly that site probably gets read more than most 'professional' music writing because of its shareability (read: buying into clichés of how women experience music compared to men)

i only skimmed it cos who gives a fuck but the amount of art of pretend ignorance etc going on was bad enough on its own

faux-naive bloggy voice

oh yeah that's the one

https://31.media.tumblr.com/4c0ab27bcc2166acb1a62f7213bf3943/tumblr_inline_n1xwdcUmcR1sauz6x.jpg

the copy of INFINITE JEST and the iPhone and the coffee all in the frame is just too much

yeah but look a Richard Wright book included in sight of the camera

haha that leapt out at me too

coffee, though, really? It's a pretty popular beverage iirc

an iphone, how dare she

they must've spent hours setting up that shot, those fucking [i'm not sure, insert whatever "owns an iphone and drinks coffee and has a copy of infinite jest on bookshelf implies in 2014]

Oh hey, we have finally reached the point where "I don't even own a copy of Infinite Jest" is the new "I don't even watch TV".