LOLZ in the Conference Room; I'd Like to EXCELSIOR some of that

is there anyone Bono hasn't been influenced by?

― Number None, Wednesday, October 30, 2013 5:25 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Tuomas.

― the objections to Drake from non-REAL HIPHOP people (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, October 30, 2013 5:26 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

willie joe padden was in new york, taking a well-earned break after the 89 final, when he came across the scene of a fire. a young woman was screaming for help from the top of the building- "my baby" my baby". "throw it down" sez bauld willie joe, "and i'll catch it". she demurred, in as many words. "throw the child down" he sez again, his deep voice booming heroically between the buildings, amidst smoke and screams, "and i'll catch it, god help us". the young mother remained torn but unconvinced.

willie joe pulled himself to his full height, for all the world as if he had been called all-a-sudden to an FCA muster in bundoran, and cried "i'm willie-joe padden from belmullet! i have one minor connacht title, one u-21 connacht title and five connacht senior titles, a county league medal and two gaeltacht medals!"- these he produced with great solemnity as he listed them each in turn. "there's men from here to listowel and back might drop your child from the height from me to you, but willie joe padden is not such a man!".

pressed by these claims (and, possibly, those flames) the mother felt she no longer held discretion in the matter. she flung the child (a mere blob of a crátúr, who would not be eligible even for a junior team for some decade yet) down the storeys towards the great man.

he, that master of newtonian differentiation as best practiced- from the eyes straight to the hands and never mind the computational centre at all- took his mark and leapt as was his wont in those days- like a kingfisher in reverse, diving straight up towards the falling target. his strong hands closed gentle around the child, and he hit the ground with an impact felt a street away in either direction.

as the crowd cheered in delight and disbelief, he proceeded to take three mighty steps and kicked the unfortunate infant a full seventy yards down the street.

― drugs/lies: poll (darraghmac), Wednesday, October 30, 2013 12:51 PM (36 minutes ago) Bookmark

Nice Irish twist on a classic gag.

lmao

"i'm willie-joe padden from belmullet! i have one minor connacht title, one u-21 connacht title and five connacht senior titles, a county league medal and two gaeltacht medals!

no NYer would have any idea what any of those words mean

*whoooosh*

hahaha

Nice Irish twist on a classic gag.

― grown-arsed man (onimo), Wednesday, October 30, 2013 5:58 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Successful conversion you might say

baby has to be bounced twice before he kicks it down the street imo

not if you take it on the third step, and tbf in a fire the ref would prob let you away with on or two over imo

from the Rob Ford/Crackstarter thread:

sex tape huh

― Matt Armstrong, Saturday, November 2, 2013 3:20 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nooooooooooooooooooooo

― snoop dogey doge (seandalai), Saturday, November 2, 2013 3:35 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Not the crack we want to see

― Bailey (Collins) Lover (Eazy)

(from a Hendrix thread):

Whoa, 10 years ago ILM actually took the time to answer a question respectfully even if it was a dumb one and the op was obviously being agressive out of nowhere.

― Moka, Sunday, November 3, 2013 12:43 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yea nowadays someone would be all like OI SOME BIG BELL-BOTTOMED BIRD IS A-PLAYIN THE BLUESIE-WEWSIES, IMA MAKE A 'ORRIBLE POST TO ME ILXOR CHUMS

― your face comes with coleslaw (Neanderthal), Sunday, November 3, 2013 1:10 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://24.media.tumblr.com/3c4ff114a93f1033f83d1b33281e83fa/tumblr_mkyeztVcWD1rhkwkto1_500.jpg

― pplains, Monday, November 4, 2013 11:54 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

being an atheist hipster Amish has to be a difficult life

― the doleful cant of a bigot blinded by fear and hate (DJP), Monday, November 4, 2013 11:56 AM (28 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I mean, do they even make a bubble tea for that

― the doleful cant of a bigot blinded by fear and hate (DJP), Monday, November 4, 2013 11:56 AM (2 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

whoah, where does that come from?

whoah, where does that come from?

Yes, exactly. The question that brought us to that jpg.

such a quality lol, for a theist djp is ok imo

Black person posts snappy, witty reply. Atheist laughs in the face of his computer monitor.

im so much more than that, if you'd let me be ;_;

http://frtim.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/3904056793_3dca2544db_o.jpg

lol

- Bob Marley

Maybe if you are an Atheist in Iran?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/2/24/StingConcertBudapest2.jpg/170px-StingConcertBudapest2.jpg
"I'm an atheist
an illegal atheist
I'm an atheist in Iran..."

I mean, in what world is there this false choice in the first place? I mean, couldn't all of those black, feminist, gay and transgender folks also be atheists? Let alone the even more basic question: in what world is an atheist treated with the same kinds of oppression as the groups listed above? (is this person a time traveler to Catholic Spain during the Inquisition or something?)

I know that the mentality that would go in for this kind of posturing in the first place is not worth arguing with, but sheesh, it's just more bad PR for atheists at a time when there's already plenty of that going on. As an atheist myself, this dude needs to stfu

^ very telling omission of gingers imo, verrrry telling

Gingers can't be atheists

and it's the very epitome of this strange phenomenon that we've also seen as the Christian right has started to cloak itself in the minoritarian language of the civil rights movement- a kind of "oppression envy" in which people try to arrogate victimhood so that they can have bitching rights, with no sense of the big differences in power and physical danger that stand between them and the people whose strategies and language they appropriate- it's the worst, most insulting way to rip off the civil rights movement, and you hear it all the time when hardline Xtian fundamentalists say that they are being "persecuted" etc. it's just odd to see an atheist claim this for himself- atheists at least really are a minority, but all minority experience is not alike and it's preposterous to front in this manner

um surely it's a 'hilarious' joke

geez none of the atheists I've ever owned have complained that much

See now that's a LOL...

Free Shakey's Atheists!

you hear it all the time when hardline Xtian fundamentalists say that they are being "persecuted" etc.

tbf a persecution complex can be a built-in feature of christianity

can be? it definitely is. same as with Judaism.

My freshman year of college in 1990 Campus Crusaders for Christ had a "persecution week," which included some dumb Christian LARP bullshit where they divided into "Romans" and "Christians" and chased each other around campus and tried to involve non-believers in their dumb games as a recruitment strategy.

hey man, any opportunity to punch someone from campus crusaders for christ should not be squandered imo

hey we're persecuting atheists in the conference room

i gotta get in on that oh shit its just larping NOOOOOO!

It was like my first week of college and I was smoking in the dorm lounge (lol old) and some ding dong was like "HIDE MY BIBLE THE ROMANS ARE COMING" so I accepted the Bible, and when the Romans came, handed over the Bible and told them where the the other CCCer had gone. Then I GROUND OUT MY CIGARETTE ON HIS FACE.

j/k about that last part. I put the lit cigarette out on my tongue and made my head spin all the way around and set the bible on fire with my mind.

I always enjoyed the redundancy of a "Crusade for Christ"

I would venture into guessing what type of music Lester would like in 2013 had he lived, but that's like a pube away from writing fanfic where Gene Shalit fucks a cartoon pony.

― obie stompin' moby (Whiney G. Weingarten), Monday, November 4, 2013 12:38 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's just a pube away
it's just a pube away

all in the blink of a pube

Hit me with your best shot
Why don't you hit me with your best shot
Hit me with your best shot
Pube Away

So won't you smile for the camera
I know I'll love you better

Pube
It will come back to you
Pube
It will come back to you

AMANDA

bad people can't make good art???

― anonanon, Monday, November 4, 2013 8:58 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I don't know for sure, but... I think that's the case! Can Thurston make good music now? Probably not. New Neil Gaiman will probably turn out fine. Is Amanda Palmer a bad person? I think if you're bothered by the things she does, the music won't make you forgive her.

― Philip Nunez, Monday, November 4, 2013 9:20 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

picasso was super nice i heard

― lag∞n, Monday, November 4, 2013 9:25 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Live stream going via the Toronto Star for this next announcement, whatever it is

http://www.scribblelive.com/Event/SinglePost.aspx?PostId=95303187&lang=undefined&ss=1

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, November 5, 2013 7:45 PM (15 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

URL says it all:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/dc-sports-bog/wp/2013/11/05/rob-fords-press-conference-tie-features-http://images.chron.com/blogs/askacat/hatcat.JPG-logo/

― Geoffrey Schweppes (jaymc), Tuesday, November 5, 2013 7:56 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

IRL LOLz

i can't stop laughing.

Ned! Entrapment!

just a bit disorienting to see the aftershocks claim more dead

unregistered didnt post in that thread and your post was a bit too tryhard-xelab

my six.byseven post, m8

unregistered's post is the best thing to come out of the whole saga mind

that doesn't quite work as bathos or self-deprecation, 'i was at a show nobody cares about' because evidently you did/do care about it, a lot

it works in terms of a relativist affirmation, 'my six by seven is as important as your vu show in 67' but that isn't 'funny' and it doesn't 'pwn' anyone

never ask for your exam paper back lj, accept the grade and move on

LJ you did at least tryhard

ha, the essence was deconstructing the idea of the 'legendary show' by chucking in something quite low-profile & immaterial (they've since broken up and reformed again) that would act against the canonical rhetoric of the threadstarter, but maybe that's more petulant than funny. analysing what is funny can be quite productive tho and i'm glad we're doing it live on excelsior

in all fairness though, six by seven rocks harder than vu

i saw myself host a private listening session here in my bedroom just three days ago. a half hour before sunset i put on Rubycon. about 15 minutes in i asked myself, "are you going to play this one all the way through?" i smiled huge and replied "of course, man!" it was dark by the time the song's 34th minute rolled around. the mixture of an epic lava lamp with an epic track orchestrated by such a master selector created something hard to describe. it will probably remain one of my top 5 musical moments for the rest of my life.

― disinclination loops (unregistered), Saturday, 6 September 2014 23:32 (Yesterday)

otm

What potentialities does excelsior have? How can it most productively strive against its own reactionary marketing & outmoded* orthodoxies?

*They're outmoded. Deal.

― 龜, Monday, January 6, 2014 2:01 PM (8 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

getting that reference might qualify it as a "too much time on ilx" post as well

lol

fyi I relegated my post to the second thoughts thread because I felt like a snob for *disparaging dj culture* (especially when said dj is THE UNSUNG SECOND GREATEST DJ OF ALL TIMES) and also I felt like an asshole for mocking an experience that obviously means a lot to gr8080 nearly a decade later. but tbh I simply cannot relate to a worldview/culture in which "some guy spun this one 20-year-old record at sunset and it gave off some rly chill vibes" can be the highlight of somebody's musical existence, on par with going to Woodstock or seeing Charlie Parker's last gig. I'm not proud of my irrational rockist impulses & I feel like I should contain them to a safe space where they won't hurt people's feelings.

but that entire thread is some bullshit, so I appreciate imago's fearless front line attacks.

(xposts)

lol i hadnt read that post before i read yours

anyway gr8s is just doing the same thing as lj except not trying to 'make a point'.....circumstances make the event, not whatever 'importance' history grants it

yeah nothing against the orig gr80 post, just found unreg's remake hilarious