Yippee-IA, Motherf***ers! IRRATIONALLY ANGRY PT. 2: Irrationally Angrier

words/phrases that get used in an ironical way to mean their opposites, but then get so heavily used that the sense of irony is lost

always have to stop and think for a minute (= a long, long time) about which meaning of "coin a phrase" is the original

there are probably more but that's the one I most often try to put in a sentence and then find myself hurriedly rephrasing to avoid

Wait what's the other meaning of "coin a phrase"?

So I was thinking that it originally meant "to invent a new phrase" and is now mainly used ironically to mean "to drag out a hackneyed old phrase" and now on the rare occasions you hear the former usage it may even be doubly ironic in that it's used to signal something so lame and clunky that nobody else has ever wanted to say it, but I've totally confused myself about which is the original, again

don't mind me

i always say "to quote a phrase" unless i'm sure i'm the first one saying it -- then it's "coin."

Here's my two cents. If you want to quote me you're going to have to give up a coin.

also from the phrase "not trying to [do a thing]"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvYIpa1Ulvw

someone at work keeps leaving the microwave with 17 or so seconds left on the clock so I have make an extra key press to zero the timer before I can start.

This happens at my job EVERY DAY.

Mine too. We have a running joke about it.

"What time is it?
*glances at microwave*
"It's 17 o'clock."

Is there a significance to 17 seconds? I mean didn't think you could see a level of done-ness to an item being microwaved to that degree but haven't used one in a while or is it standard for the timer to go off 17 seconds early to give you a chance to get to the thing being cooked, not thinking you might be hanging around the door instead of on the other side of the room or whatever.

It's indicative of the person who left it. The microwave isn't even fast enough - this person needs their food NOW NOW NOW. Their time is worth gold, their satisfaction is the only thing that matters. Considering that someone else may need to use it afterwards is way down the list of priorities, if on it at all. Their parents probably never made them clean up after themselves.

it's not always 17 seconds (but was the last time). the button adds 30 seconds each time so if you want a non-multiple of 30 then you have to stop it.

(17 seconds = cure album title, i've just realised)

my microwave at home goes

0:30
1:00
1:30 then
2:30
3:30 etc
annoying if you want 4:00

and you have to twist the knob a long way go get it to increment 10 seconds - going to 4:00 manually takes about 4 whole revolutions. time-saving device?!?!?!

Sometimes you walk away from the microwave and you walk back and the shit is bubbling like crazy or something so you stop it before it goes any further

And then you hit the clear/reset button.

I like "in a minute," and "not even trying to hear that!"

i'm not trying to go to jail today

http://scraphacker.com/bowler-hat-lamp/

what the fuck is this fucking shit

and i thought i was going to regret packing all of those bowler hats

everything about this aesthetic makes me want to murder

That seems like a waste of perfectly good hats.

how about a fedora version?

All you need to know.

That's gonna be something to explain to the insurance adjustor once the smoke clears.

ha. this place here, london one, the black one in the left half of third picture down, is around the corner from me and has one in the downstairs window.

http://weburbanist.com/2007/10/05/cramped-urban-living-9-of-the-narrowest-city-houses-in-the-world/

(it has kind of a shop-front window despite being only 5ft wide. they change the contents of it from time to time - lego haunted houses around halloween, for instance)

• Downloaded song from YouTube video.

• Make own movie using song.

• Upload video to YouTube.

• YouTube mutes audio because song is copyrighted.

I GOT IT FROM YOU, DAD.

People who stop at such a distance from drive-through windows that they have to open their car door to do their transaction.

Saw that happen at my corner liquor store and immediately thought Oh No, he's getting robbed.

Don't know why (A) someone would rob a liquor store through the driveway (B.) in broad daylight (C) with their driver's side door open, but there you go. Just something that isn't supposed to be done.

In the gym with my locker open getting dressed. plenty of open lockers in the general vicinity. Motherfucker chooses the one right next to me

someone's got a crush on you

Hah I've done that drive-thru thing before but only because I misjudged the distance and there were cars behind me so I couldn't back up and maneuver. (I am not a good driver)

The way my heels even with the commando type sole wear down rapidly on the outside of the foot, seemingly leaving the inside almost totally unworn. Only seem to last about a month and a half.
& this is with them being reheeled by one of the 2 remaining traditional cobblers in town, who I've gone to for years. Think they wear down even faster when done by one of the heel bars around town.

Can't work out if I'm walking in a really unhealthy manner or what. & it's not like I'm doing any hiking in them or anything. Do I need to relearn how to walk or something?

http://walking.about.com/od/shoechoice/a/wayyouwalk.htm

You might be able to get orthopaedic insoles that will correct it if it really is a problem.

would those metal heel taps help? internet says that the nylon ones are better, noise-wise, but need replacing monthly.

http://www.ebay.com/sch/sis.html?_kw=SHOE+REPAIR+-+Shoe+Boot+Heel+Toe+Plates+Taps+Nylon+Proctectors+-+PREVENT+WEAR

These are heels and as far as I can tell are made out of the same substance that Commando/Ranger boot soles are made out of. So should last ages, and I would think that this place which is a father and son business should know what it's doing. I'm just getting tired of going through heels that fast, they cost about €20 a pop.

I have always counted on them for a decent job and doubt if they're slipping themselves. & they're recommending these heavier duty heels so I'm assuming they're good. But they seem to wear down really fast so I'm left wondering why. Didn't think I was any heavier tahn I'd been for much of the time I'd been using their heel repair service, actually lighter than some of that time.
Subsequently I possibly do need to relearn how to walk. Or alternatively find a way of being carried around then I'd never wear my heels down.

Brittle or hard materials can actually wear faster than some that seem soft but are resilient? I dunno. I have like 4 pairs of shoes that need new heel lifts myself.

Other thing is that both of my pairs of boots turned out to need new heels at the same time. I actually wound up taking off pair I was wearing, putting others I was going to take to reheel on and getting that other pair reheeled since I think they were done less recently.
Doubt if a lighter heel would be better, main reason I've been going for a Commando/Rangers type heel has been cos I think it's going to last longer.
Don't know what ideal solution is, just assuming I must have changed the way I walk or something and may need to learn how to walk more effectively. Not really getting why I'm getting results I'm getting.

& to make things even better I now have had the idiot woman downstairs complaining that water splashing from my watering plants is a reason to get her a new flat. She has actually been to the representative of the landlord who is here while the apartments are being redone and complained. I heard her this afternoon saying if he (me) doesn't stop she needed to be rehoused. & her evidence was a patch of water being absorbed into the pavement. Everything now has saucers under it.
I've now had the representative suggest I put cardboard or plastic bagging under everything and I'm just wondering what the results of that will be with rain. Me being left with stagnant water or something being tipped downstairs. & there's rubbish blowing around outside this idiot's door which I bet is also being blamed on me

I think water either hit leaves and bounced off, overshot the pot or arced out as i straightened the watering can after watering something.
I'm still stuck with this being absolutely trivial but it has now been reported which makes me extremely annoyed.

Especially since when I first came into contact with this eejit she was ordering me around what I was able to do with my balcony which the representative has pointed out is a no-no. Plus if this eejit wasn't shortsighted she may see across the square I live on there is somebody who has a number of plants on their balcony which I think is also true of a few other places along this row. But apparently she was going to get me kicked out if I didn't move my plants.
But apparently also it was downright weird of me to think it was ok to grow plants on a balcony. Sorry just makes me see red.

So in short because water splashed down onto the pavement below earlier today, the woman downstairs has announced to the representative of the letting agency looking after the apartment I live in that she will need to be rehoused. Unless I stop, letting water splash down which seems inevitable if you're using a watering can.
What's below me is pavement, not somebody's private area.
& this woman who lives below me started everything off by ordering me to move my plants off the balcony a few months back. I've since put saucers & trays under every plant out there, But she seems to think that she has authority over my usage of my own balcony. Which just has me thinking fuck off every time she says anything to me. Especially since she announced a few months back that she was going to get me kicked out if I didn't move my plants.
So I can either go and tell her to cop on to herself again which just doesn't get through to her.
Or live with a bunch of bagging lining my balcony that is likely to accumulate water which will either stink or alternatively need to be tipped onto the pavement below so seems utterly impractical. Or alternatively will need to be meticulously emptied some way that is likely to be labour intensive. & why, to satisfy somebody who is going to cause a stink anyway since I've been disobedient?
& I now may have a complaint against me that just strikes me as verging on the parodic.
What do you do to a control freak to get her to cop on to her not actually being anything remotely like your boss?

I just encountered #plurntup on Twitter

what the fucking fuck

What the shit is that?

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/47401000/jpg/_47401549_smith.jpg

http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/52009000/jpg/_52009623_jex_1009016_de28-1.jpg

and 'funny' BBC news reporters generally.

r, i c

Not to be too 'society is in the gutter', but I feel like this is a fairly recent development, or certainly that there was less of this stuff ten years ago.

ok, all these buzzfeed/upworthy links that specifically tell me how I will feel about something in advance -- "This slideshow of 27 disabled cats is the CUTEST THING YOU'LL SEE ALL DAY" "This genius boy will win you over in only 90 seconds" etc. It's just like that annoying relative who ruins his own jokes by prefacing them with "I've got the funniest joke, this is the funniest joke, you ready?"

IA at the publisher of the Slash autobiography who thought it would be cool to have ridic huge pull-quotes splashed throughout the book, and slightly skewed margins that are supposed to imply 'heyy yah whatever man it's rock n roll we don't care about MARGINS' but it mostly just looks like they fucked up cutting the pages or something

oh and TOO MANY EFFING TYPEFACES

stop it

the makers of the mustard i use have widened the diameter of its squeeze bottle hole

it is such a clumsy and obvious way to force ppl to 'accidentally' use too much/buy more that i am infuriated

ragh I hate that too!

Those plastic bags in building lobbies to put your wet umbrella in. They may solve the buildings problem, but then it just creates one for me.