Sarahel's Semiotics 4U

GrubHub, one of those online food delivery services embodies the Innocent Smoothies Aesthetic:

Oh, hey. We wrote this tweet for you.
This @GrubHub order rivals the time I was dealt a Fake Jewel Card during a fierce match o' Fireball Island. http://bit.ly/ZM1wk

do innocent smoothies and related products that utilize the faux coziness also have sans serif fonts?

this is the food delivery service logo:

http://payload27.cargocollective.com/1/1/49595/2843172/grubhub1.jpg

yes, mostly

http://i.imgur.com/QaBU6cu.png

it definitely is associated with childhood and whimsy and slightly saccharine storybook narrators.

oh, the notebook paper in that popcorn ad! like classroom assignments.

it definitely derives from the "friendly face of corporate commerce" concept:

http://www.tshirtgalleries.com/wp-content/uploads/pit-pat-tshirt.jpg

of which this is a parody

army long underwear or womens stretch pants vs Ariat riding pants /???

energy drinks

http://i.imgur.com/oCjqYLN.jpg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDsAZRn2DZE

http://i.imgur.com/VPxdd2e.jpg

this one is swedish

The Reeds is definitely the odd one out in that display

http://www.censorwatch.co.uk/images/ad_pussy_energy_drink.gif

wowww

wait is that real

yeah

The name Pussy shocks and demands attention - that's the point. Inhibition is a recipe for mediocrity. This is a premium energy drink named with confidence.

...

We believe in challenging the consensus – and moving things forward. Pussy is about natural energy, it’s irreverent, sophisticated and a pleasure to drink. Pussy is NOT about being serious, chemical energy, having a corporate attitude or being predictable.

― vermonter, Thursday, 31 July 2008 16:50 (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This shit was the F-Word last night giving Graham Norton some obvious jokes to make.

― Jarlrmai, Thursday, 31 July 2008 17:25 (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Why is every product advertisement/promotion these days just total wank? Actually that would be a good name for an energy drink - Total Wank. "Yes folks, drink Total Wank! The energy drink that tastes like, er, total wank..."

― snoball, Thursday, 31 July 2008 18:14 (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

time was bro drinks just needed some extreme sports tie-ins, now they're all about fight club negs *raises delilo novel in one hand like bible*

http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

http://offlinehbpl.hbpl.co.uk/News/ORP/4E42FE4F-9490-A743-863F070F6A36F16D.jpg

front hoof resembles outsized ballsack

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

innocent cosies resemble & could presumably act as ballsack warmers

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

http://offlinehbpl.hbpl.co.uk/News/ORP/4E42FE4F-9490-A743-863F070F6A36F16D.jpg

Just got offed wrote this on thread Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating? on board I Love Everything on Jul 20, 2008

OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU

THINK ABOUT THAT FOR A MICROSECOND

THEN READ ALL THE BLURBS ON THE SIDE OF THEIR VITAMINWATER BOTTLES

THEN SCREAM A LONG LONG SCREAM
Just got offed wrote this on thread Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating? on board I Love Everything on Jul 20, 2008

OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU

THINK ABOUT THAT FOR A MICROSECOND

THEN READ ALL THE BLURBS ON THE SIDE OF THEIR VITAMINWATER BOTTLES

THEN SCREAM A LONG LONG SCREAM
Just got offed wrote this on thread Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating? on board I Love Everything on Jul 20, 2008

OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU

THINK ABOUT THAT FOR A MICROSECOND

THEN READ ALL THE BLURBS ON THE SIDE OF THEIR VITAMINWATER BOTTLES

THEN SCREAM A LONG LONG SCREAM

______
http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

http://innocentdrinks.typepad.com/innocent_drinks/2010/12/a-man-and-his-goat.html

The idea is that the goat will have kids (that's what you call a baby goat) which can be sold for meat if they are boys.. (sorry guys)

which can be sold for meat if they are boys.. (sorry guys)

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

http://www.innocentdrinks.co.uk/blog/2013/july/win-tickets-to-the-next-innocent-inspires-event

3. pauline
august 02, 2013, 07:38am

the tasty think I have even eaten was a extra large burger with extra cheese wow I felt so ull after it but still had room for my favourite drink innocent

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif

_________
http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU
OMG IN THE TOP CORNER ON THE SITE THERE IS AN ACUTE ACCENT ON THE E OF GLACEAU

goat ballsack warmers, that is

__________
http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

o my ballsack is frozen, how may i sire kids (that's what you call a baby goat) now?

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http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

fear not, innocent shall aid thee, subtle Goat! these discarded smoothie-cosies shall 'fit' your purpose most snugly

____________
http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

aye, verily! coddled soft as kid (that's what you call a baby goat) leather!

_____________
http://www.geaugaconstitutionalcouncil.org/userfiles/image/GoatBehind.jpg

well, would thou shirk from cladding in vestments torn from the skin of thine own slaughter'd Young? not in Winter, i'll say! he he he

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y109/fez_/goat.gif

VESTMENTS TORN FROM THE SKIN OF THINE OWN SLAUGHTERED YOUNG (that's what you call a baby goat)

It's Der
Scheisse!
Our Grübtoberfeast Sweeps is back! If you remember last year's, ignore these sentences and enter now. If you don't remember last year's, that's because you can't handle your liquor. But we assure you it was the best time of your life, and you didn't make out with anyone you shouldn't have.

Anyway, our writer wasted a lot of your time on that intro, so we'll spare you the German puns we had lined up and get right to the point:

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